{ two }

🥀🥀🥀

🥀🥀🥀

Amarra had been weirdly quiet and down while they were eating and chit chattering, and this didn't go unnoticed by Abuzar. He couldn't help but wonder as well, is it because she was still unable to get over that jerk and move ahead?

Sundala and Taha decided to leave since they had to get their wedding cards on their way back home and it was getting late. Bidding them a goodbye, Amarra wore her sneakers and turned to tell Abuzar that she was leaving too when she found him wearing his button up shirt above the white T-shirt he was wearing.

"I'll take you home." He said walking towards the rack, getting his sneakers.

"No need. I'll go by myself." Amarra quickly shrugged her hands, getting closer to the door.

"I'm still gonna drop you off." Abuzar tied his laces, rolling his eyes, as this always had to be a topic of debate for them whenever she would come over.

"You don't have to, really." Amarra still pestered him to win over this time.

"You expect for my answer to change at this?" He got up, pulling on his shirt, as he opened the door.

"Gosh. You're so stubborn. It's literally just ten minutes away. I can go by myself." She complained once again but still made her way outside with him following right beside her.

"And I can just walk by your side, giving you free company for those ten minutes." He gave her a smile, the deep crescent shaped dimple appearing on his right cheek, as he shut the door.

"I love your dimple." Amarra once again was in awe staring at it. She had always, ever since she met him, complimented him on his dimple everytime he smiled infront of her.

And this always caused Abuzar to grin wider, causing his cheek to further dig down in the crescent shape.

"And now you're gonna ask, 'Can I touch it?' Yes sure miss." He bent his neck forward at her level, the smile still happily plastered on his face.

Amarra was flustered by his sudden change in mood, as he would usually not let her touch it and stop smiling at this demand of hers. Except for a few special occasions, he let her do it for just a second.

"Really? Okay, one second rule!" She clicked her finger in it for a second, and quickly retreated it back, grinning.

"Ab chalein?" He straightened up as they both made their way outside the building.

They walked step by step in silence, enjoying the way like on an evening stroll and catching up with the street lights.

Amarra was deep in her thoughts as Abuzar glanced at her from time to time, knowing she wanted to clear up her head by herself, he decided to be her silent companion for now. Amarra heaved heavy sighs while dragging her feet on the pavement, her past paving it's way back into her mind, as her heart got dragged into the mess too. And once feelings are involved, a person becomes helpless to their ownself.

/PAST/

3

4 years ago.

It was again a freezing cold morning for her, but today her insides were filled with warmth since the one and only boy she had fallen in love with was coming over to her house with his parents to ask for her hand in marriage with him.

Ishaq Yabani, the guy she met at college in America. He was the first Pakistani guy she came across there, his desi looks with his deep accent could confuse a person about his identity though. He was quite known for his academic success there, and going to the same tuition as him was how they met each other, he was from senior year while Amarra was in her junior year.

Living in an open surrounding, she was led astray by him approaching her over and over again, and soon she felt that the heat rushing to her cheeks at his compliments and her heart beating fast everytime she met him were actually the feelings of love. His confession to her at college had her fly over the moon, as she talked to her mom about him. Who had told her to follow the right way, and if he sincerely loves her, then he shall come with his family with a marriage proposal. That's what led to the exciting day of today.

However, that very morning she heard loud noises coming from her house, as she heard her dad shout, "Call the ambulance!"

Different bad scenarios rushed to her brain as she ran down the stairs, to find her world stop for a moment. Her mom. She was lying on the sofa, pale and lifeless.

"Dad! What happened to mom? Mom?" She tried shaking her mom, to be answered with nothing but silence.

That day, she lost her mom due to a sudden heart attack. The people called as doctors, they couldn't even save her. Amarra had begged them, bawled her eyes out, but that worst day of her life had to dawn the misery upon her, nevertheless. Afterall, no soul can change the time of death of a soul belonging to the Higher-One, if He decides to call upon it's end.

Days passed by, as she kept herself locked in her room mourning for her mom. Sometimes crying for her to come back, sometimes begging for just a hug, and sometimes just lifelessly staring into space.

The worst part was Ishaq had completely disappeared and never contacted her. She had messaged him that day, telling him she was at the hospital, her mom was in a critical situation, but he never replied. Although, he should've been there to at least console her, to tell her it'll be fine, to give her a shoulder to cry on, wasn't that what all lovers do? For the people they really loved!

When she went back to college, another bomb was dropped on her as she got to know Ishaq had left. She didn't know where to, but all she heard was he went back to his country. She again tried contacting him through emails or whatever means she could, but to no avail.

Why was everyone leaving her?

First her mom, then Ishaq too. She didn't have any friends there.

Friendships there weren't her type, because she couldn't fit in their culture. Even if she tried to, she couldn't. Since she still had the believes in her heart which her mom had taught her, and she would never break them off just to lessen her loneliness.

The only reason for her to stay strong was her dad now. She had to be a strong daughter for him to keep going. They only had each other now. Her dad still couldn't watch her grow weaker day by day as he rarely saw her smiling now, he often heard her crying at night in her bedroom too and he finally decided to leave the place which caused so much sorrow to their hearts.

They came to Pakistan after a year, as Amarra hoped she could start anew in her motherland without any further heartbreaks. She got an admission in a university here, and was finally going to begin the new journey in her life.

Unfortunately, that hope also didn't last for long when her dad told her that he was going to remarry a woman here. Reasoning, he couldn't possibly take care of her alone. She needed someone like a mother figure. More like he couldn't survive alone while she was a grown-up girl who could definitely not take care of herself.

That was the day she had a huge fight with her dad for the first time, as she ran out of the house in her loose strawberry trousers, and an oversized hoodie with a strawberry on it again.

She didn't know of her surroundings, she just continued to run as the path infront of her continued getting longer and longer, leading her somewhere, purposely.

Her tears had dried out, as she stopped running when her surroundings turned too dark, realizing she was in an old alleyway.

Shifting her eyes around, she heard some loud noises coming out from the right. She reluctantly stepped ahead and entered the street bazaar which also had quite nice cafes and a large grocery store, which was basically the main stop for the locals to buy groceries.

People were sitting in the open air, on the dirty plastic tables and chairs as Amarra made an 'ew' face looking at the guy packing up a burger in a newspaper while sauce dripped from his hands.

Gosh! Where had she come to?

The silent cafe and the brightly illuminated store on the other side seemed to look more peaceful and clean so she moved towards it.

She was getting odd looks from the people around her, making her feel uneasy of her surroundings.

She was being watched by a big fat uncle sitting on the other side, probably waiting for his order to arrive, and the fear finally found her.

Quickly, taking quick steps, her panicked gaze turned around the area in the darkness of the night. She doesn't even know which way she came from? Her heart started thumping in her chest loudly as she crossed the grocery store, and found some sign boards near the cafe. Finally deciding to go towards the right direction, she wiped the sweat formed on her forehead from the sleeve of her hoodie.

As she was about to walk away, the door to the cafe opened and she tilted her head to find the very unexpected human to be walking out of the place, with a girl beside him.

She wished she had never turned back and should've walked away from there, but maybe doing the opposite was the right choice since she didn't have to live with curious questions and unread emails all her life.

"Is..haq!" Her voice came out in low stammering tone. The girl by his side had her arm wrapped around his.

"Babe, this girl....I guess she just called you." The girl nudged him.

Amarra was on a rampage inwardly. She felt her heart clench in despair as the thought of turning away and running as far as possible hit her.

Their eyes met that instant. And she knew, she couldn't go away without getting the answers. She needed to know why, why did he disappear all of a sudden just when she needed him the most? Why did he never tried contacting her? And why was he with another girl right now? Why were they meeting like this after a whole year? Did he ever care? Were all those love confessions, compliments, marriage proposal, all of it fake? Was the love between them even real?

"I don't know her." He instantly shifted his clearly shocked gaze back to the girl by his side, his hand folding inside his pockets.

"You don't know me? For real, Ishaq?" His name rolling out of her tongue stung her in the inside. But she was going to face him today, staying strong, no breaking down!

She tightly fisted her hands under the long sleeves of her hoodie, slowly stepping towards him, under the lights.

"Ah, stupid me!" He laughed nervously as she stood right infront of him now, her brown orbs trying to hide all the sorrow and pain, he had left her with. "She... was actually an acquaintance of mine in my college, at the States."

"Oh, so you met her in the US?" The girl with him gave her a judging look, her eyes roaming around Amarra's casual outfit.

"Acquaintance?" Amarra gave him an unbelievable look, not knowing whether she should laugh at him for acting like he doesn't really know her, like he never confessed his love for her, like he never proposed her to marry him.

"Yes, meet her. She's my wife." He started off with the introduction, to keep himself on the safe side, so that Amarra doesn't utter something about their past. Not caring once about her feelings. Not caring how all her questions came clashing down, at that single word he muttered.

Wife. He got...married?

Amarra stood there blank. Everything around her seemed to have been blanked out, as his words kept repeating in her mind, hitting her like a truck every single time.

"You go sit in the car, I'll join you in a minute." Ishaq handed the car keys to his called wife, as she nodded, leaving.

"Amarra, Listen." He exasperated, heaving a deep grateful sigh, now standing directly infront of her.

No, you listen! You're the one who needs to listen to the sound of my shattering heart. How could you just.....?

"How have you been?" He asked so normally, as if they were in a position to ask that right now.

"Why....why did you disappear?" Her voice felt so small, so broken, she couldn't even recognize it herself.

"I know you must've many questions and complaints for me, but let's talk it out some other time. I've to go right now. My...wife, she's waiting for me."

He was acting too casual, he was acting as if he didn't even remember them anymore, which hurt her more.

"So am I another girl now?" Disbelief was all she could feel now.

"Amarra. I feel like you're still living in the old days of our college when we were immature and named the feeling of infatuation among us to be love. I've moved on, have my own family now, and I wish for you to do the same as well. I know it was my fault for leaving without a notice, but life is unexpected afterall. I hope you could forget me and let's live our own lives peacefully now." His tone was dripping with sweetness as always, but the words he spat were venom to her heart. She let out a sarcastic chuckle at his response. What? Infatuation?

When a person refuses to believe and accept the pain being pondered on the heart, mind creates a barrier to stop the flooding thoughts from hurting you.

Her laugh, was a sign that she wasn't ready to accept anything anymore. As she continued laughing, Ishaq was left in an awkward situation as his wife calling him on his phone made him run away from her, confusing her odd behaviour to a psychotic disorder, just like the others around, except for the pair of hazel green eyes, who had been watching her since earlier. He was licking his ice cream, being seated infront of the grocery store right beside the cafe they were standing by.

She crouched down on the floor, hugging her legs, as the tears prickled down her cheeks, the laugh slowly turning into sorrowful mourning.

Life was playing a cruel game with her. Everything crashed down altogether. Her mom left her all alone. Her dad decided to marry another woman, replacing her. Just like she was replaced in Ishaq's life. That moment she realized one thing, Love isn't true. No one loves anyone endlessly like shown in those romantic movies. The red roses she loved thinking they represented love weren't actually the representation of love but just an attraction to inflict their tiny thorns into your life and cause pain to you.

Since happiness never lasts for long just like the rose petals rot after a while, while the pain lasts for longer or maybe forever, just like the thorns never lose their edge.

"Hey, strawberry." She finally gave in to the voice she had been trying to ignore, as her light brown eyes slowly lifted the heavy eye lashes up, which looked much longer and heavier due to all the crying, making her eyes look ethereal. She sniffled in, rubbing the sleeve of her hoodie over her red nose.

"Wanna have some ice cream?" He offered her a strawberry flavoured packet, as she stared at it for a long while, trying to grab her surroundings.

Sitting on a clean bench outside the store, she held the ice cream in her hand, which had started to melt slowly. He stood by the wall near the bench on his one leg, while shaking the other one up and down, his eyes still on the unknown strawberry girl.

"Why are roses red?" She questioned, her eyes following the drop of melted ice cream dripping on her finger.

"Roses are red...." he went into a deep thought hearing her hoarse voice finally say something. "Because violets are blue." He flicked his fingers, proudly grinning.

Soon, the silence broke as Amarra broke down into a warerfall of tears once again.

"Why me? I can't handle all this pain anymore. I don't want to live like thi-"

Her teary light brown eyes met the pair of hazel green ones as her next words disappeared into her mouth. He was crouching down infront of her, as she froze on the bench.

"Because you're a special soul sent to this world which is a test for all of us. Never say that you can't handle the pain given to you since He never burdens a soul more than it can handle." He pointed at the night sky, indicating to their Creator. "Just stay strong until the end, and you'll get the reward for all the hardships, either in this world, or in the eternal one."

His words hit her so deep in the heart, that she felt a feeling of trust, the feeling of being loved, the feeling of being someone who actually had a worth, because she had Allah watching over her all the time.

He held the melted ice cream from her hand, keeping it on the side of the bench. "Saari ice-cream zaya kardi meri." Almost scoffing, he found a tissue after rummaging through his jacket's pockets, handing it to her for cleaning the mess her hands were in.

"Za-ya?" Holding the tissue, she used it to wipe her eyes instead of her creamy hand.

"You were supposed to clean your hand with that, Miss strawberry."

He stood up to look for another tissue in his pants pockets. "Kia museebat hai!"

"Mai pee leti hun!" Her words had his mouth hung open as he gave her a shocked look.

"You understand Urdu?" He hoped he hadn't muttered anything stupid infront of her, as he crouched down holding his head, while she licked the ice cream on her hand. What the actual chirya?

"Thori thori." She said in such a cute accent that he couldn't help but chuckle. How can someone look and act cute after having a whole breakdown in the middle of an open bazaar?

"Woah. You have a dimple. A deep crescent shaped one." She moved forward, slightly tilting her head to get a side view of his profile.

"I love it. Can I touch it once please?" Her request had him slightly taken aback, as he held his cheek, hiding it behind his hand.

"Why should I let you touch it?" He asked in a serious tone, maintaining some more distance between them.

"Because.....you're my hero!" She finally smiled. She freaking smiled as Abuzar's lips broke into a satisfied grin looking at her. If he could make that beautiful smile appear on her face by this, then why not?

"Only for a second." He pointed a finger at her, as she frowned but nodded anyways.

"Wow!" She grazed her finger over it as Abuzar slightly flinched due to the touch of their skin.

After sitting there for a while, Amarra decided to go home, but how would she find home? Fiddling with her fingers, she looked around the area as the cafe had already closed.

"You aren't going home? Let me guess! You either ran away or lost your way here!" He presented his two fingers as the two options as she gave him an amazed look. He's smart, but could she trust him and tell her it was actually the latter.

"I...got lost." She muttered after some time.

"Where do you live?"

The question she feared to be asked.

"The blue house in this area." His eyes widened in shock, the reaction she didn't like receiving upon revealing it. Her dad had gotten involved in politics when they left the States, as he sold his property there to a Pakistani politician in exchange for a high seat provided to him in the politics. And now they lived in the special Blue house provided to all upper class public employees.

"It's not far from here. Let's go." His tone and expressions were too stern unlike before.

Although, that was the day Amarra had lost trust in all her closed ones, but she still followed him with that broken trust, with a hope of some left out positivity in her life.

On their way, they crossed by a park which had a small rose garden of it's own. "I found the answer to your question." Abuzar stopped in his track, gazing at the roses in the garden, shimmering under the moonlight.

"Roses are red because that's the colour which represents love and pain too. These roses have a scent of affection but also the thorns of pain. Because love isn't always always pretty and romantic. Sometimes it might get too hard for you to handle, it might cost you a lot of pain but you know why people still choose to feel this?" He walked into the garden to pick up a rose, as he then came towards a baffled Amarra, her eyes growing large with curiosity. "Because it is a price so heavy, that you pay even when there is no gain."

Presenting the rose to her after making sure there were no more thorns on it, he passed her an assuring smile, the assurity she needed to stay strong and never stop loving herself, never let her trust break fully, to always stay prepared for any test which befalls on her.

Getting in view the large sized blue house, she felt relief wash over her.

"Thank you. May I ask, what is your name?" Curiously, she asked him not knowing whether she would be able to meet him again or not, but she was going to remember him forever for what he did for her today.

"Hero. I'm your hero, right? Just remember me as that." He shrugged, his eyes shifting from the blue house to hers. "I'll get going then, Miss berry." He looked like he was in a hurry to run away from the place as he jogged his way out of her sight without hearing her response.

Hero? Oh my Gosh!

Amarra cringed at herself for saying that earlier. She must've been drunk! Well, at least she didn't say something as cliché like prince charming. A small smile made it's way on her lips as she sniffed in the rose.

A week passed by with her not talking to her dad and ignoring him. Soon, she realized that was going to be of no use, since she'd just worry her dad by being a burden on his life. She had no right to stop him from making his life decisions, maybe it was for the best.

So she agreed, she couldn't watch her dad being lonely so she got this upon herself. The evil step-mom and a nutty step-sister.

However, another positive happening in her life was; finding her hero in the same university she had gotten admission in, Abuzar Shoaib. She got quite famous in the university being known as the new "Goddess" from the States. She didn't really like the unwanted attention, but the wanted boy who had caught her attention was quite a help for her since the beginning.

Before she knew, he had become one of the important people in her life as her best friend, to whom she shared everything about herself, since she knew he would never judge her and his comforting words would always bring a positive impact on her.

Even though, at first he would always stay distant from her whenever she would approach him, but soon, he gave in when he found her breaking down infront of the same cafe one night. When she once again poured her feelings out to him, how she missed her mom, how she wasn't being treated right, how nobody loved her anymore. He could see a glimpse of himself in her, he felt her ever so deeply and he couldn't watch her breakdown like that.

However, Amarra never asked or knew much about him or his past. Neither did she ever try asking any further as he didn't seem to be comfortable talking about it ever. When she asked him about his parents and he told her they were dead, she never tried to question him again since what use was it to remind him of the pain again.

/Present/

Amarra felt like either digging a whole in the ground to bury her heart in it, or shift her crazy brain into her knee for getting all these stupid thoughts again. It's been years, why does it still matter to her?

Letting out another deep sigh, she looked up to find a lemon tree in a house's open garden area they were passing by. She jogged away as Abuzar got surprised by her sudden energetic burst. Jumping on the thin fence, she held the branch of the tree, which shook the leaves off on it, also causing her to stumble in her dangerous position.

"Tum pagal ho?" Abuzar hastily grabbed her arm, carefully pulling her down on the ground.

"Nai tou!" She swivelled her head from left to right to get off the leaves on her hair, as the lemon in her right hand proved her success. Her hair brushed against his face in the process, the scent of roses filling in his nostrils.

"Pagal nahi ho tou kuch kam bhi nahi ho." He stepped away, scratching the tip of his nose as Amarra played catch catch with the lemon, it was a good distraction.

/❦︎❦︎❦︎/

"Where are you coming from at this time?" The voice made Amarra pause in her steps. The woman Amarra tried her best to never cross paths with, but living under the same roof always made it hard for her.

Why do you care? She wanted to shout.

"A friend's place." She dryly replied, continuing to walk towards the stairs.

"How would I know if it's not a club or a bar." The tall woman, Tara, again was testing her patience as Amarra swiftly turned around to give her a serious glare. The clouds roared outside, indicating a thunder and the next heavy downpour of the sky.

"Your dead mom must've let you hoe around there in the states, but that's not how we live here, my girl." She sipped onto her tea with a smirk plastered on her lips as she saw Amarra angrily making her way towards her.

So she hasn't seen how she lets her own daughter go around wearing inappropriate clothes with random boys, while she has the audacity to question her mother's upbringing?

"What did you just say? How dare you talk about my mom like that!" Amarra raised her voice at the woman as the silence in the house made it echo. Her dad made his way outside the bedroom, shocked.

"What's going on here?" He said in his authentic tone, fixing his glasses on.

"Dad, this woman just insulted my mom." Amarra pointed at the lady, her tone still bursting with rage.

"Amarra, is this a way of talking to your elders, especially to your mom. Apologize to her right now." Instead of hearing his daughter out, he sided with his wife, who had him wrapped around her finger.

"Why should I? She was the one who badmouthed my mom! Your...your first wife." Amarra's resentmemt increased. That's why she hated being here.

"Amarra, I said apologize. Since when did you become so mannerless!" Her dad raised his voice at her as she flinched.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I forgot all my manners, I guess I should again start going to KG and learn the basics, starting from who should apologize for their mistake first." Vexation dripping her tone, as her dad gave her a displeased look. "Or learn from this woman how to-"

"Amarra!" A loud slap sound resonated the silent hall, as Tara loudly gasped. Amarra held her cheek, her face tilted towards the right, still in the state of shock. Her dad raised his hand on her. Tears spilled from her eyes as she turned towards him, the hurt in her eyes so evident, he regretted his action that very instant, but he knew nothing could be turned back now. "Amarra my dea-"

"I...I hate you, Dad!" Her voice trembled with outrage, as she ran outside, without taking a look back, without caring about the heavy downpour outside, without caring that she was getting drenched. She as always let her legs guide her to any place which could sought solace for her.

She hugged her knees, shivering profusely, her teeth clattering, as the rain had no sign of stopping any time soon. With her shaky hands, she held the phone close to her ear dialling the voicemail 1.

"Hey, berry!" The soft voice from the other side had her feel like burst opening once again.

"A-Abuzar. I-" Her lips quivered, as a loud involuntary sob escaped her mouth.

"What's wrong?" Abuzar who was busy doing his assignment, got up on his feet as soon as he heard her trembling voice. "Amarra."

And she broke into loud sobs as Abuzar barged in his room to grab his jacket.

"Amarra, where are you right now?" He asked maintaining his calm tone, as the heavy rainfall outside caused him to worry for her more.

"I- I don't know." She shuddered, feeling lost.

"Stay there. I'll find you. I'll be there. Just wait...for me." Not being able to think any further, he sprinted outside his apartment, forgetting to grab the umbrella as he himself got drenched in the rain, unbothered by it. His only thought being, he had to find her, she needed him right now.

/❦︎❦︎❦︎/

/Author's Note\

My poor girl🥺

And well, y'all must've found some suspicious feeling coming out of Abuzar here, the mystery will be revealed soon😏🐒

So, let's get into the next chap right away, cuz I'm giving

✨double update✨ today!

(Although, this chap is already 5k+ words, the longest I've written in this book!)

___᪥___