{ four }

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Amarra bit on her lip, the awkwardness killing her on the inside as she walked on the grass step by step with the woman, who was supposedly his mom according to the early morning encounter.

Abuzar had disappeared as soon as their class had ended and she'd noticed him being in deep thoughts and slightly shaken up by the woman's appearance. Walking out of the building, she had met the woman standing by the gates who had passed a knowing smile to Amarra and that's how they ended up walking to the rose garden park together.

"So, you've known him since 3 years you say?" The woman began once again as Amarra nodded.

"He never really talked about his family or anyone. So are you, not to sound rude, but his biological mother or just an Amma who raised him up?"

Amarra finally asked the question which irked her ever since the morning.

The woman stopped by near the roses, as she looked at them with fondness.

"He never talked about me?" Her smile faded. "I am his biological mother, dear."

"Oh." Amarra felt her head swirl around once again, she didn't know if she should believe in this woman's words or the words which Abuzar had told her.

"Do you know why he referred to me as dead?" The woman questioned, picking one of the roses out.

She knows? "No.."

"He's always going to be delicate like this..."She stared at the rose as if referring him to it, "Plus he's got his looks from me." She suddenly switched the topic to his looks.

He does? I can't really tell....

Amarra gave the woman a puzzled look.

"He's like a rose, beautifully grown and delicate, but if you look carefully, something more...something deeper is inside." She said holding the rose in her hand. Amarra stood there still confused.

"Something more?" She murmured staring at the rose as well.

"Even though the rose is beautiful, you can see the thorns it grew to protect itself, but it's unaware of what hurts itself. Blinded by thinking that all the past is aware to him and shall be kept inside. But not actually knowing it'll kill him in the inside..." She continued grazing her hand over the thorn. Amarra didn't understand what she was saying or who was she referring to?

"What is that supposed to mean?" She was never good with these round theories and she just wanted her to come to the point.

"He had a very rough past. His childhood would probably sound like a nightmare..." The thorn prickled the woman's finger as she watched the blood ooze out of it without even hissing. Amarra, not finding any other source to stop it, broke a rose petal out of the rose in her hand, covering the cut with it.

"He looks absolutely fine and happy though..." she wondered out loud as she'd never seen Abuzar out of place or ordinary but only as a positive soul. That's what she loved about him, how he was always so energetic and positive in any situation and how he always helped her out without wanting anything in return. Sometimes she did think, how she was so emotionally dependant on him whenever she would face breakdowns, but what about him? Didn't he ever face anything painful, maybe his life was so full of positivity that he never needed any support. But was she wrong? Did he always wear a mask to hide it from her?

"I see you to become a huge part of his life." The woman held her hand, guiding them under the shadow of a tree, "let me tell you the tale of my boy then."

It all started when she agreed to marry one of the famous politicians of the country, Ashvar Shoaib. She herself, Sunbal Aadil, was the only daughter of the owner of the most important import business there. What she didn't know was, she was going to regret the decision all her life when she found him to be a drunkard who would hit her every night. She wanted to run away from him. However, God had other plans for them as she was blessed with a son, for whom she decided to survive in the hellhole.

Naming him Abuzar Shoaib, she wished for him to never become a person like his dad. A cruel devil.

What she regretted more was, she couldn't even save her son from the evil doings of his father. She was helpless. Since all her own parents saw was the society. They refused to take her and her son back in just because, what would people say? So she struggled to live. To survive with her son. She watched him beat her son if he got too drunk at night, but she also watched him love him in the daytime when he was in his senses.

Abuzar was a kid, but he had developed an understanding of his dad's life, locking himself up in his room at night so he wouldn't get beaten up. One day, they went on a car trip. Their first ever ride together, when he was 12. Maybe, that first time was supposed to be the last to finally fulfil Sunbal's wish of setting her free from him. The car crash ended the life of his father brutally, as Abuzar barely got any injuries, while Sunbal ended up with a broken arm.

For Sunbal, that day was a dream come true for her. She celebrated it. She was over the moon. She was finally free. But for Abuzar, he had still lost his dad. He couldn't care about what kind of person he was, since he'd still been a dad for him when the sun shone. He still brought toy cars for him to play with. He still was his dad, who loved him.

Sunbal decided to pursue modelling career and that's when the son and the mom started growing apart. She started living a carefree and open life. Not giving Abuzar the attention he needed anymore, so he learnt how to survive alone in the world. She got involved with different types of bad people. And soon, she was used by them. That ended her up in a huge debt, and when the actual image of the late Ashvar Shoaib got viral, her career was completely over being known as his wife.

Although, Abuzar didn't need to bother about it, since he had debated with her on this topic for years. But he couldn't watch his mom die under the pressure of the debt and dirty looks so he had to get involved with those people to clear off the debts. However, he had left home that very day, clearly telling her that she had also died for him the day he lost his father in the car accident.

Amarra found fresh tears dripping down her eyes as she heard her end the story of his past. How can a person be so positive after living through such a hard life? While she had always been oblivious of the pain he still must be carrying in his heart.

The small scar on his forehead which he always hid under the strands of his hair falling on it, always running away from the topic of childhood memories, never talking about his parents, she had found all the answers to the unanswered questions today.

How stupid of her to never notice! How selfish of her to always cry about her life to him when he had actually gone through worst! Could she really be called his best friend now? What kind of friend was she when she never actually cared about asking his feelings or pain?

"Abuzar, mera beta." Sunbal stood up from the grass, as Amarra juddered when she found him standing near the garden. His gaze, dark and unknown. His rock like expressions, never seen before. He was angry, but broken. One look and she knew, he heard it all, once again, reopening his past chapters.

/❦︎❦︎❦︎/

'Please come back, Abuzar. Please. Don't go. Don't leave me alone.'

She forced open her eyes, almost panting, as if she was actually running behind him to stop him. It was the worst dream. A worst nightmare.

Amarra stood up from her bed, walking towards her table. Staring at the vase of roses, she'd kept on it, she refilled the water in it for the fifth time today.

She had not seen or met Abuzar after that day. It had been five days, and she had never ever felt as helpless as now.

How she thought that the pain she felt when she lost contact with Ishaq was killing, how she thought the news of her father remarrying was the worst, how she thought finding out she was replaced in Ishaq's life so easily caused her heart to break forever, but all those were actually nothing compared to this feeling of helplessness.

He didn't come to uni. Missed calls, no response. Messages, delivered, no reply. Apartment, empty. His signs, none!

Where could he be? She had no idea.

Running to the convenience store every night, she hoped she could find him there. Going to his apartment every afternoon, she knocked hard on the door in hope he'd open it shouting a "Do you wanna break open the door?" Shouting his name loudly as well so he could just call her a "phatta hua speaker".

Doing all the tiring stuff but never getting tired of it, living in hope of finding him everyday, she realized one thing she was scared to admit.

She had fallen in love with him.

Not only because she missed him too much, but because he actually meant and mattered to her a lot more than she had known or thought in his presence.

Praying for only his well-being was what she did every night. Abuzar Shoaib was actually like the rose of her life, which she was scared to lose even when it wasn't hers to keep.

Her prayers were finally answered when she saw him entering the gates of the uni, by which she always waited for him everyday. He was again empty-handed, but that didn't matter today.

"Abuzar!" She ran towards him, tears brimming in the corner of her eyes, a wide grin plastered on her face looking at him walking in completely alright. "Where the hell were you? And phone kia gutter mai gara (gira) ae ho? I was so worried sick! You don't even know how much I-- Nevermind, I'm going to smack you and cut you into pieces and throw your meat out for your chiryas to eat the next time you ever play this stunt on me, hero!" She finished her rant, saying in a warning tone as he stood there in complete silence.

"Speak up! Where have you been?"

"I wanted to hide away for a while. I just...couldn't face you anymore. I know you must've many questions to ask me, so I ran away. How pathetic, ain't I?" He let out a low sad chuckle, looking away. She'd known his story, but she still didn't know how he had survived alone through those times. What had he done to feel less lonely.

"I wish you could be me for one day then maybe just maybe you could also see what I see when I look at you." Maybe just maybe then you will realise I love you more than words will ever be able to describe, better yet they haven't made words to describe what you mean to me, "When I see you, I see my best friend, my support system, my cheerleader, I see the one who's always there for me even when nobody else is, better yet wants to, but you, you're always there. You're always there when I need a best friend, a shoulder to cry on and a laugh." She stepped forward, staring directly into his hazel green eyes, glancing through the pain they had held in them. But I couldn't be there for you.

"I'm....Amarra. I'm sorry. I just...don't know anymore. I shouldn't have left like that. I'm really sorry. I didn't want to worry you for no reason." He was rambling as Amarra felt her heart constrict once again. He still cared about worrying her about himself, when he needed at least someone to lend him a shoulder, to share his pain, but since he'd never done that ever since young, he didn't know he actually needed to let it out to be able to set free from it.

"Knowing that you're there for me at all times is all the assurance I need. You're a friend worth-keeping until the end of time, and I'm here for you, no matter what comes our way." She held his hand which was in the air as he was rambling, giving him a guaranteed smile, a lone tear escaping her eye. He was left speechless as he look fixedly in her brown tears-filled orbs, making his heart ache at his stupid attempt of hiding which caused her so much of pain, he never intended to be the cause of. But now, he knew it would be impossible for him to let her know where and why was he actually hiding and what had he gotten himself into....

/❦︎❦︎❦︎/

/Author's Note\

Guuuurl is in luuuuuuv!🌝

Boiiii is in quarantine-- 💀

Okay, sorry!

Well, how did y'all find the chappp!?👀

Yes, I'm leaving y'all on suspense again👉👈🌝

Drop down ur reviews in the comment section since the author wuvs reading them sm✨ and they motivate me to continue bursting new stories with my stupid writing!

Also, I wrote this chap while being sick🤧 with flu and a killing sore throat! So I was basically quarantined (thats where the above joke came from!💀)

and no, it ain't ✨corona✨

🙂

Also, I'm proud of myself for coming up with these stupid plots

*flips hair*

And of course, the stupid theories whick idek make sense to y'all or not- but still

*triple flips hair*

(my dramatic self literally did it thrice🙂)

Anyways, y'all should,

Take care!🥀

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