25

25

Before You Lie

KENDALL SAT on the frigid bathroom tile, painting over her mint-colored nails with black polish. She knew she should have removed the paint underneath first, but she didn't care. Lately she found herself not caring about anything.

The shower was running as Kendall painted her nails, waiting for Ryan to leave the house. She had hardly slept at all that night as the man she once thought she knew slept soundly beside her. A knock sounded on the door and Kendall stiffened, holding her breath. "I'm going now, Kendall. Stay safe. I love you."

"Stay safe."

Kendall's stomach churned. She was in a constant state of uneasiness and anxiety. It ate away at her, destroying her from the inside out like a parasite. She muttered a weak 'goodbye' loud enough for Ryan to hear. As soon as she heard the front door close, Kendall shut the water off and exited the bathroom.

Her hands shook as she carefully stepped into her car. The air inside the vehicle suffocated her—it smelled just like Ryan. His cologne lingered in the car and made every part of Kendall's body ache. It was almost as if he were next to her, telling her not to leave.

Without a particular destination in mind, Kendall started the car and pulled out of the driveway. She drove mindlessly, unaware of any turns or stops she would make. A while later, Kendall's subconscious lead her to Phoenix's apartment.

She knew Phoenix was still mad, but where else would she go?

Kendall made her way up to Phoenix's condo and hesitantly knocked on the door. It swung open suddenly after a few moments. Phoenix stood at the door, her eyes instantly narrowing at Kendall. "I don't want to see you," she said bluntly before beginning to close the door.

Kendall stopped her halfway. "Wait," she said shakily, trying her best not to cry. She was sick of crying, but she couldn't help it. "I have nowhere else to go."

Phoenix opened the door once again and took in Kendall's disheveled appearance. She looked exhausted. The area around her eyes were dark and sunken in, and her bright green eyes that usually danced and twinkled were void of all emotion except sadness. "Oh my God. You look awful." Phoenix stepped aside, inviting Kendall in. "What happened?"

Kendall could hardly speak as she sat next to Phoenix on her couch. "Ryan . . . he . . ."

Phoenix's brows furrowed. "Are you scared of him?"

Kendall nodded slightly and proceeded to describe what had happened two days prior with Phoenix giving her a look of disbelief the entire time.

"You need to fucking leave him, Kendall. This shit is serious."

Kendall looked down at her fingers and played with her newly painted nails. The glossy finish of her black nail polish was almost reflective. "I'm afraid that if I do, he'll try to hurt himself again," she spoke quietly.

"So what if he does? It's not your job to keep him happy." Phoenix stood up from the couch. "We'll figure something out together, but right now you need rest." Phoenix left the room and came back with bottled water and a blanket. She handed them to Kendall. "Stay as long as you need."

And so Kendall did. She slept the entire day, and for the first time in a long time, she was relaxed.

Kendall had woken up at sunset. She walked to the large window and stood in front of it, admiring the different hues of reds, pinks, and oranges smeared across the sky. The warm colors made her feel safe and comforted. In that moment, there was nothing Kendall had to worry about. It was just her and the golden sun that stretched over the horizon.

Then she turned on her phone. The anxiety she had felt free from for the slightest moment crashed into her all at once. A short yet ominous message from Ryan stared up at Kendall from her phone screen.

Come home. I need you.

"Maria's coming home soon," Phoenix called from the kitchen. "I'm making chicken Parmesan and spaghetti. Is that okay?"

Kendall's throat felt dry. "Yeah."

Another text.

Please.

Kendall exhaled. He needed her. She had to go. Kendall knew she would never forgive herself if something happened to Ryan because of her.

She had left the condo without a word. Before Kendall knew it, she was parked in front of Ryan's massive home. In Kendall's eyes, however, it was more like a cage.

Ryan was waiting for Kendall inside. He didn't say a single word to her when she came in. Instead of demanding to know where she was like he wanted to, Ryan enveloped her in a hug. Kendall didn't resist. She rested her head on his chest and sobbed heavily.

She was tired.

Ryan held her close and stroked her hair gently. Seeing Kendall upset was like a knife in the gut to him. Kendall was the kind of girl who only deserved to be happy. A frown on a face like hers seemed so foreign.

Ryan watched Kendall as she rested that night. He knew she hadn't slept at all the night before. Kendall would get over whatever rough patch she was going through. Ryan was sure of it.

Kendall's phone buzzed against the nightstand repeatedly. Ryan reached over his sleeping girlfriend to check it, and what he saw devastated him.

Displayed on the dimmed screen were three consecutive texts from Phoenix.

Kendall, why aren't you answering?

Are you okay?

We'll find a way to get you out of there. I promise.

There was no exact word to describe just how infuriated Ryan was in that moment. The fact that Kendall was slipping from his grasp upset him, and there was nothing he could do about it. The fear of losing Kendall caused Ryan to sweat and made the blood in his veins feel icy.

He refused to suffer from the pain and agony of a broken heart again. The mere thought of it made his chest ache.

Ryan would miss her, but he knew it had to be done.

If he couldn't have Kendall, why should anyone else?

★

Kendall awoke in bed by herself the next morning. Daylight managed to seep into the room through the half-shut blinds. Something was wrong-she could feel it. The first thing she did was check her phone. Kendall rubbed her eyes and read the first one she saw.

I thought I could trust you.

It didn't take Kendall long to connect the dots. Ryan had a way of finding out everything whether you made it obvious to him or not. There was never any point in keeping secrets or lying to him. And when Ryan was lied to, that was when he was most dangerous. For someone who's lies flowed as easily as water, he couldn't seem to handle being lied to.

Kendall leaped out from under the white sheets, not bothering to put on any shoes. She opened the bedroom door, only to find Ryan standing directly behind it with a large knife in hand.

Gasping for air, Kendall backed away, trying to think of something—anything she could use as a weapon. Just like in her relationship with Ryan, Kendall was completely defenseless. She felt weak, small, and worthless.

This was it. She was going to die. Every ounce of hope in her body had dwindled down into nothing.

Then suddenly she remembered the lamp on the nightstand next to her. Kendall quickly grabbed it by its silver base and yanked it, causing the plug to come out of the outlet in the wall. Mustering up as much force as she could, she hit Ryan's head with it and ran as Ryan fell to the floor.

Pure fear blinded Kendall. Her chest was heavy, and air was scarce as she raced down the spiral staircase. She knew that Ryan was determined, and he wouldn't stay down for long.

In her head, the same word kept repeating over and over.

Survive. Survive. Survive.

Just as her foot made contact with the last step, a heavy arm wrapped around her waist and pulled her back up the stairs. No matter how hard she kicked, screamed, and cried, Ryan would not let her go. In Ryan's mind, Kendall had to die. If Ryan couldn't have Kendall, then he didn't see why anyone else should.

He was only one deserving enough of her love.

Ryan brought her back into his bedroom and threw her against the wall, pinning her arms down at her sides. Kendall's heart pounded in her chest, the steady rhythm of it reaching her ears. "Please, Ryan. Put the knife down and we can forget this ever happened. Everything can go back to the way it was before."

"How do I know you're telling the truth?"

Kendall blinked. "Because I love you."

Ryan dropped his arm to his side, shaking his head at the ground. He laughed. It was a dark, menacing laugh that haunted Kendall. "Oh, Kendall," he said hysterically, almost sounding like a little boy. "Don't you know? You always blink before you lie." Ryan had been driven to the brink of insanity, his eyes practically bulging out of his head as he traced his finger over Kendall's quivering lip. "This is your fault, you know. You drive me crazy."

Kendall cried harshly and quietly, her shoulders shaking as Ryan stared at her with a crazed look in his eyes. "Please."

Ryan pouted. "Believe me. I really wish it didn't have to be this way." He drove the knife deep into Kendall's stomach and could feel her becoming weaker against him. Ryan twisted the knife slowly and let Kendall fall to the floor.

"Meeting you, Kendall Morgan, is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me," Ryan said as he watched the life slip from her eyes. Tears spilled from his dark eyes and raced down his tanned cheeks as Kendall's body became limp.

"And I don't regret a thing."

FIN.