I took my sweet time to reach my locker. Derek tilts his head when he sees me and gives me a smile. The smile that once used to flutter my heart. The smile that made all my bad days good.
The smile that has no effect on me now.
"Hi," I tell him as I approach closer. Emery excuses himself and walks past me.
"Hi," Derek says. He tries to engulf me in a hug but I step back.
Getting confused, Derek looks into my eyes. His blue eyes that used to mean the world to me. The eyes that I fall for in the first place.
The very same eyes that make me feel to run away and cry alone in the corner now.
I gulp and look at him straight in the eyes. "I texted you, you didn't reply to them," I tell him.
Derek stiffens for a moment. "I-my phone dropped in the pool at the party on Friday," he says. "It wasn't waterproof, and I couldn't reach you for that. Though dad said he will buy me a new one."
I nod. He doesn't look like he's lying but I don't feel like trusting his words anymore. So what of his phone died? If he really wanted to reach me, he just could've used his parents' phone or the landline.
But I let it go. For now. "We need to talk," I say.
Derek nods and follows me outside.
"This better be quick. Don't want to make the princess late for her class again," he tries to joke. It had no effect on me.
Is this how fast feelings change?
"W-where were you on Friday?" I ask him once we're away from the school building, closer to the parking.
My question seems to startle him. I admit I'm sounding like a clingy girlfriend, but Derek has left me with no other option.
"I waited for you after your game," I tell him. "I thought you left for the locker early and waited outside for you. But you never came." I look into his eyes. "It was Owen who told me you left right after the match had ended."
His eyes widen. "T-that's not true." His face turns red from anger. "That Roberts was fucking lying." Or fear.
I ignore him and continue, "You could've at least text me. But no, you didn't. Not even a single call or text the whole weekend," I say. "I called you only God knows how many times, you didn't pick up. I texted you, you didn't reply. You just vanished any explanation. Do you know how worried I was? You could've been dead or badly injured for all I know!" My voice breaks in the end as I sniff.
He tries to step closer but I back away.
"I know you're busy, football is your life, and you literally breathe it. I never minded it. You know why?" I ask him.
"W-why?"
"Because it never made me feel less important to you. You- you cared for me. You always used to be there for me. You used to make my bad days glow. You used to make me feel wanted."
Derek opens his mouth. "I still-"
"No, you don't," I cut him. "You don't want me anymore. You don't care for me. Can you recall our relationship before the senior year? Can remember the last time you asked me how my day was?"
This time, Derek doesn't meet my eyes. "Can you recall the last time you had lunch with me? Or wait for me after school? Or drove me to school? Can you remember the last time we spent some alone time together and were just being ourselves?" I shake my head. "No, you can't. The only little time I get to spend with you these days is the fifty minutes of Chemistry class. That's how much I matter to you now."
I start crying. Derek doesn't move. He doesn't try to reach out to me. Or soothe me. He just stands there, watching me as I cry.
"What came between us Derek?" I ask. My voice, it almost sounds like I'm pleading. I sound nothing like the voice in my head last night when I thought of this conversation. I knew what I was going to say to him then. I told myself I won't cry.
But today, seeing him just in front of me. I can't do it.
Yes, it's been a while since we have fallen apart, doesn't mean I can't deny the feeling I had for him.
There was a time I thought he was the one. But now, it's nothing but thin air.
For a moment, he says nothing. Then, "So what do you want me to do?" He asks me.
I choke a cry. "I want-"
"You want me to give you all my time? All my attention?!" Derek raises his tone. His face changes from passive to irritation. "You expect me to leave football, my dreams for you?"
I shake my head. "No-"
"Shut up!" Derek shouts as his breathing fastens. He closes his eyes. I try to reach for his hands. But he steps away this time.
"Kiara, I'm so sorry to say this," Derek says opening his eyes again. "But I don't think I can do this anymore."
"D-do what?" I ask. "What are you trying to say?"
Derek hangs his head low. "You don't trust me anymore. You've drifted apart." Me? Does he think I'm the one who has grown apart when he was the one who has been ignoring me?
Then I feel the pain in my chest when he says his next words. "I'm sorry Kiara, but I think we're over."
The words come out like poison to my ears. But Derek doesn't wait to see my reaction. He turns around. I hear the first-hour bell ringing as Derek's footsteps start to fade.
But I stand there motionless.
What has just happened? Did-did Derek really break up with me? But I didn't want us to break up. I wanted us to work things out.
'Did you really?' A voice, deep inside my mind, asks.
I don't answer it.
Then I heard it again. The footsteps.
They're fast like someone's running. It gets louder with every passing moment. A part of me wonders if it's Derek coming back to apologize?
But that part gets disappointed when a taller figure than Derek stops in front of me.
But the rest other parts of me-
"Kiara?" Ashton asks as he steps closer. "What happened?"
He takes my hands in his. I don't move. "Snow?" He asks again.
His voice sounds so concerned that the spell breaks right then and there. Before my mind can register what's happening, my body moves and jumps in Ashton's arms.
Instead of jerking away or pulling back, Ashton wraps his arms around me.
"It's okay," he whispers in my ears. "It's all going to be alright."
I pull back and face him fully. I put no effort trying to hold back my tears.
"You weren't there in Mrs. G's class," he starts. "Miles told me you came to school with him this morning. I was so worried about you so I left the class to look for you. Then-then I saw Derek entering the building and I-"
"He broke up with me." Tears start pouring out of my eyes again. There's sudden pain in the pit of my stomach as I start to feel nauseous. My head starts throbbing badly.
Ashton stares at me. For a moment, I thought he was going to laugh or throw a party. But he does neither of those.
Instead, he wraps his arms around me and pulls me close. He doesn't say anything more for a while.
Then when my tears come to a stop, "Do you wanna skip the classes today?" He asks. "I'll tell Grace and Miles to collect your homework."
Without thinking twice, I nod. I need to get out of here. No way I can get back in like this. Not when Derek and everyone else is still there.
Ashton leads me to his car and opens the door for me. I get in and fasten my seatbelt. Once Ashton gets in the car, he switches it on and we pull out of the parking lot.
That's the last thing I remember before my eyes start to close and I fall into a deep sleep.
ð¸
So...Kiara and Derek broke up, did you have it coming?
What do you think will happen next?