18. FEAR OF LONELINESS

ACT THREE SCENE FIVE

FEAR OF LONELINESS

DEVON ACADEMY IS BRIGHTLY lit with exquisite chandeliers. Students were talking to each other in hushed tones. Their eyes were on a specific person, a beautiful dark skinned girl with euphoric brown eyes that could enchant any onlooker. Normani had her head held high, she carried a confident smirk, she was ready to destroy someone who had taken everything away from her. Her mind was filled with bright red thoughts that screamed revenge, she didn't just want Jumin Xu gone, she wanted his whole capitalist clan gone. Burned of their ego and their reputation on the floor with her above them.

"Thanks to Asher, you're here, better than ever." Solar says, the petite asian girl smiles, her beauty was astonishing. Her pretty brown hair that has recently been chopped short, she wanted to portray the view that she's mature, instead of the boring idea of being cute. She wanted to outshine many, but she wanted to do it in the most respective way.

"Little did he know, he brought chaos." Normani says, scanning her freshly done acrylic nails.

Sahar sighs. She wasn't sure with this revenge plan at all, she found it pointless. Her gut feeling was screaming that Normani is wrong, she's misunderstanding the whole situation. But there's always the feeling that she could be right. It bothered Sahar to the point where she wasn't sure how to react to Normani's return.

"I'll see you later." Sahar says quickly, turning away from her two best friends and walking away as fast as she can before they could question her odd behaviour.

She places her hand on her chest, her heart was beating rapidly. She couldn't stand the idea of having bad thoughts about her own friends, she felt as thought she was betraying them. At this point, she felt like a horrible friend.

"I didn't think you'd be upset on the day you friend returned."

She turns to meet the eyes of Asher. He had the same beguiling smile on his face, the one that she hopelessly found herself adoring as the days went by. She felt confused as to why she's acting this way, why is she behaving so differently?

"Don't tell me you regret your decision of wanting her back already." Asher says, leaning on the locker behind him. Sahar simply purses her lips, she wasn't sure how to respond. She didn't want to give away the fact her friends were planning a rebellion against the billionaire bad boys club.

"No!" Sahar blurts out. "It's just that I don't feel well today." she murmurs, causing Asher to frown. His eyes scan her face intensely, he reaches out to touch her forehead with his palm. He feels her temperature slowly, causing Sahar's body to stiffen. She felt her body burning with desire, the same desire she felt for him before. But he'll never remember it, he'll never remember being with her that one night. To him one night stands mean nothing, all he would have in his head are blurry images of hearts he has broken.

"You seem okay," Asher says, placing his hand on her shoulder. "Are you sure you're not upset?" he asks, waiting for her response patiently. Sahar simply looks away, she pushes his hand off her should abruptly.

"I-I'm fine, don't do that please." she whispers.

Asher furrows his eyebrows.

"Do what?"

"Act like you care." her response catches Asher off guard. He felt his eyes widen a fraction due to her statement. "I know you don't care, now that Normani is back, I think it's better if you and I end this companionship."

"What?" Asher responds, his voice lowering.

"Don't use me Asher, I don't want to be used as a little experiment for you, you wanted someone to hold, to talk to and learn about feelings with, unfortunately I'm not going to be that person for you, find someone who actually would want to do those things with you." Sahar says, walking off, leaving Asher to watch her fading figure.

He clenches his fists tightly. It wasn't supposed to end like that. She was supposed to be there for him, it was a part of their deal. As long as he brought her friend back, she'd be there for him. He wanted to understand people more with her, he wanted to learn how to be a good person. With her gone, he'll feel even more lonely. Without her, he would continue to be a horrible person.

She was supposed to be there with him. Help him become better, she was supposed to ease the loneliness. She's gone, she's no longer there. He can't be the richest person in the academy without her, he can't take over Luca's position as the leader of the billionaire bad boys club. She's Luca's weakness.

And without Luca's weakness.

He could never accomplish complete wealth.

sahar glacé

PERSPECTIVE

THERE'S SOMETHING WRONG with me. I'm enjoying the idea of Asher's presence a little too much, his smiles, his touch and the way he speaks to me. He talks to me like he cares about me, going against his reputation for being a cold individual. So I had to end this companionship he wanted between us. The more I speak to him, the more I get reminded of the past he'll never remember.

The night we both shared. He was drunk, and I, I was a stupid girl thinking he would actually admire someone like me in his sober form. When really and truly, nobody will ever admire me, nobody will ever respect me like I respect others. And that's the sad truth about my life, no matter how hard I try, people will always use me until they no longer need me.

Maybe I'm afraid. After Asher finds me boring, he wouldn't want to be my friend anymore or what he likes to call it, companion. I'm sick and tired of people who I trust leave me, I'm tired of this constant idea of being lonely. The constant stress of wanting someone to be there for me the way I'm there for them.

"You're crying."

I look up to find Luca Valdez standing in front of me with a pack of tissues. "Don't waste tears, waste tissues." he says, handing me a tissue. I frown at his appearance, i was supposed to be hating him. But why? Why am I grateful to see him? Why does my heart not accept the idea of me despising him?

"I'm being dramatic." I murmur, wiping my tears. Luca simply looks at me with a stoic expression on his face.

"Dramatic for feeling sad?"

I nod my head.

"I don't think you are, we all have the right to express our sadness are we not?" he looks at me, taking more tissues out of the packet. "Waste it, my company plants a lot of trees, it shouldn't be a problem."

His words make me laugh. "Seriously Luca, did you really have to involve trees in this conversation?"

"I didn't want you to think I'm a person who doesn't care about the environment."

"Why do you care about what I think?"

"I didn't say that." Luca says quickly.

"I could've sworn you said that."

"T-That's not the point, we're talking about you, refrain from talking about me." Luca stammers, looking up at me. His eyes meeting mine.

"But talking about you, makes me feel better." I mumble, I could feel my cheeks heating up. That was an embarrassing thing to say but I actually meant it. Talking to him about himself made me forget that I was sad for a moment, it made me feel better.

"I guess if it makes you feel better."

"Has anything happened lately? How are things with you and your father?"

Luca sighs. "He's still mad at me, the night he saw the both of us together, he got insane."

"That sucks."

"I wish he'd just understand, being rich doesn't make me happy, being rich doesn't make me want to live." his words were soft, it's as if he has been tired since his childhood. He despises the idea of being rich when he's one of the richest teenagers alive. But why? Why is he like this?

"What makes you want to live?"

Luca pauses, he looks at me for a moment. "I'm not sure."

"If it helps, I don't know either."

"I just want to be able to touch—" he pauses his statement, causing me to furrow my eyebrows. "Not touch, turn my life around a be a different person." his eyes were on his gloves, the same leather gloves he always wears.

"Is there something you're not telling me Luca?"

He looks at me before shaking his head. "Nothing, nothing is wrong, how can anything be wrong if you're here with me?" his words warm my heart, he's doing everything to make me feel better. Even talking about his misfortunes, I sort of feel bad for pushing him to the point to talk about his family and life.

"Thank you." I say, looking at him with a sincere expression. "For everything." I was wrong for misjudging his whole character based on what his family did to mine. He has his own fears, his own doubts and his own terrors.

"Don't cry over people Sahar, it's not worth it, I've done it and I 10/10 don't recommend." Luca says, handing me the last pack of tissues. Leaving me alone, to watch his lonesome figure fade away.

sahar has finally cut ties with asher because of conflicting feelings and the idea of losing a friend. her bond strengthens with luca.

sorry for the long delay of updating, i apologise. a lot has happened but now i'm motivated to finish this book. it's going to be a short book! it should end soon.