Chapter 23: chapter 23

ch-23 life has become dark. I didn't slept last night. I was worried, anxious, panicked and stressed at the same time. I can't go outside. the media will be waiting for me. Wait. 44 missed calls from Andrew. I am not picking UP his call! its all because of him. I hate him . I could have died peacefully but no. now What will I do! . if was not this silly to drown in water. but if I remember what he said yesterday. *" listen to me madi! I don't give a fuck of these websites. I just wanna say that I.. I LOVE YOU"*........... I.. just  can't really help but think is it really his fault.? do I also love him? . even though If I would have loved him then my love would not go against my terror. what Shall I do now? Shall I call him?  * knock * knock*someone is on my door. " madi. its me Andrew. please open the door. I... I am sorry"I really want to open the door but my fear is not letting me to. " Andrew please. leave me alone. "I cried" but madi.. "" just GO AWAY"I SHOUTED. " OKK. I am sorry madi. I hope you will be okay. "" I AM FINE! "I Lied. .................... my life.... its dark again. no joy. no happiness. just my terror and fear. I wonder.. if Andrew was correct. will I have to face my fear no matter what. is this the only way to be happy in life? I just don't want to Live. father... why have you left me in such a situation. I hate EVeryone. everyone is Selfish! I just will sleep.! ....................................... ........................ " madi. you will have to face your fear. no matter what. "" yes madi its not that hard as you think"" madi. don't be like your father. fight for your life."" but dadd.... AHHH. A DREAM . dad. mom! I started crying again. why can't I just Live like a normal person. I don't know what to do next. I will. I will stay at home until I feel like going out.