The old abandoned factory was just like I remembered it from the last time. Big, half down and with that weird scent of sweat, piss, weed an alcohol. The crowd was suffocating and loud, cheering like animals at every hit, and I flinch every time Connor took a blow.
He as already spit blood to the ground but that only seemed to spike the blood thirst of this bunch. I was unease, feeling not only nervous but worried and kinda scared at both the situation and heavy environment. I shifted closer to Trevor under the column and he sent me a brief glance, putting his arm on my shoulders before focusing back on the fight before us.
I wasn't that sure yet that we were friends. He was kinda weird, too straight forward and a little unease, but I guess kind in his own way. And he made sure I was alright in here while Connor was busy. And I needed this safety he provided I felt like throwing up at the display of violence before us.
Soon, but not as soon as I would have liked, Connor finally made the end bow, dodging the other guy and making them fall on the dirty floor before knocking him off. It was scary, but also... kinda hot. And I would blush at my own uncalled thought considering the situation, but I was too overwhelmed by everything else to fully acknowledge that thought or my reaction to that thought.
Only then Connor made his way here as the crowd cheered excitedly, exchanging the bet's gains and they call for new volunteers on this neanderthal show. I was on my tiptoes, anxious until the moment he stepped out the taped circle on the floor and then met him half way, letting my arms closer around his middle and letting his solid presence take away the previous stress.
"Oh my God, how are you? Are you okay? Are you bleeding? Do you need to-" but was halted in my ranting by his hand on my head, keeping the hood down to my eyes.
"Not now." he keep his other arm around me keeping me close.
A part of me wanted to believe it was because he needed me close as well, but it was clear what was really going on was that he was hurt and needed me to steady him. And also, so I wouldn't get lost in the oppressive crowd pushing and pulling, screaming and making loud noises more proper of animal than of humans.
I shouldn't have come. Connor didn't want me to, but when I say I would be he didn't tell me off either.
Maybe he wanted me here deep inside but knew it was right and so he acted like this. And yes, I was forced to hide and cover up once more.
Was it really so important that they don't know how I look like? Despites when around Connor, the eyes never navigated even remotely towards me. I doubted anyone would care enough to take full notice.
Same as last time as well, we went outside right after, not really wanting to spend more time than needed in that foul place and he leaned against the back of the car as Trevor took out his first aid kid. For the easy way they resolve this, it was clear this was his ritual. They made obnoxious bets, Connor got out there to be roughened up, and then he patched him and split the gains.
And that made me unease, it stirred something in my guts and got me walking side to side not knowing what to do with this energy.
After Trevor was done inspecting his ribs, Connor sat on the back of the car to inspect his knee. Even as collected as he liked to be, he winced when trying to bend it and my heart squeezed.
"Stop it." he finally spoke and even if his eyes were on his leg I knew he was talking to me.
Stop? "S-stop what?"
"Stressing. It's stressing me."
I huffed, but did stopped, turning to fully face them -ass well as I could through the hood that blocked part of my view fields.
He wasn't stressing. Not over this messed situation he'd put himself into, and certainly not over me. He must be mocking me.
I watched as he took the band Trevor was handing him and wrapped his need with it tightly. I hope he really wasn't injured.
"Does it hurts?"
Trevor chuckled from the truck, pulling away everything before closing it and sending me an amused glance, and then looked towards Connor. "You have a boo-boo, Conny? Want her to kiss it better?"
I blushed aggressively at his mock and Connor sent him an icy glare, tying up the band that peaked under the hem of his black gym shorts. He didn't even need to utter a word to let him know his thought on this one: Fuck off.
Trevor scoffed. "Don't look at me like that. You know I'm not that wrong." he looked over where a new car had just arrived and it was greeted by cheers and hollers from the rest of those lingering here in the skirts of the factory. "Hey, I'm gonna get myself some. Want something?"
By something, he meant alcohol. I knew how this worked from the last time. This new car that had arrived brought drinks and other stuff. Whoever it was that had the idea of monetizing their fun in here definitely hit jackpot. The moment the car arrived, lots of people moved to have a can a jar, a bottle or whatever it was this man had in stock.
I shook my head at Trevor's question and Connor shrugged. God knows if that was a proper answer to a yes or no question, but Trevor didn't seem to mind it and headed that way leaving us alone.
"So, are you hurting or not?
"Alyson."
"Yeah, yeah, stop stressing you. But what about an honest answer?"
There was the smallest slope in his lip and he finally stood on his feet once more, slowly to test the resistance of his kneed but my guts unclenched when he made no further sign of pain. It mustn't be as bad as my imagination forced me to believe.
"Let's go." his arm when around my shoulders pulling us forwards.
"And Trevor?"
"He's already busy." he gestured over and I looked to see him in the car next to the one selling alcohol, standing between the thighs of a beautiful blond he was kissing viciously and I blushed.
"Oh." was all I managed, not really surprised but shocked at the same time. Was that combination possible? But my thoughts were interrupted when I noticed him guiding us south instead of north, bringing us further in this neighbourhood... could this even be called neibourhood? "Where are we going?"
"I want to take you somewhere."
"Really?" it softened something under my ribs. This was new. "Where?"
Connor smirked, guiding us away and I just let him. Even when he made no effort to respond. Maybe he didn't feel like to, or maybe he wanted it to be a surprise, whatever it was, I much rather think the later and let it be more romantic than aloof as we moved through these empty streets, with rubbish and probably rats. The music and the furore of the events at that factory.
He didn't limp as much now, but we walked slowly, and his arm came easily over my shoulders when we headed a bit further and I laced our fingers, keeping it there.
Apparently, where he was taking us wasn't that far at all. A little down the street and then he brought us into another lonely building much to my surprise. Into it. I could feel my heart speeding at the danger and forbidenness of this whole situation. I was pretty sure this was illegal. Not, go to jail illegal, but if the authorities caught us here we would be in danger.
Connor, of course, rolled his eyes, amused.
"If they don't bother controlling the fights, I doubt they would notice anything below Marcial's market."
"I guess..."
We were indeed further down that crowd of obviously unallowed street-fighting place, to get here, someone must pass that, and Connor had told me the implications with mafias got them off their radar.
It unsettled me to think Connor was mixed with something like that.
One thing was to play rebel, stray bullet and against everyknown system. But another was to get involved in such destructive bad things.
He wasn't even eighteen yet.
Even if he's told me he never interacts with the underworld crows and mobs, he did participate in the specatacle. Trevor had described like 'a freelance'.
As he helped me get to the roof I glanced down to watch my step, catching the bruising in his knuckles and feeling my stomach. He might be okay with this constant violence, but it wasn't that easy to me. At least now he wasn't limping as much. The band must be working and keeping it all together.
"Considering you can't walk straight, you really think it's safe to be up here?" I wondered, unease in my steps because this was -after all- the highest part of an abandoned place. This building didn't seem as rotten as the one where he had the fight, just unkempt and lonely, but still. "Are you hurt?"
He sighed forcefully through his nose, but I couldn't tell is he was getting irritated at my prying or just found my worriness amusing. "What do I need for you to believe I'm fine?"
"Stop bleeding?" it came out immediately and as a question and my eyes widened. Had I really just said that? But his lips quirked in humor instead of getting triggered and shook his head, helping me the last gape and so we fully stood on the roof.
It wasn't plain, instead it bent lightly, not enough inclined for it to be a ramp but enough to make my vision bent as well and my knees weakened at the sudden impression. This wasn't the tallest building, but it was at least five floors and I knew a fall this large would most likely kill me.
I clung unconsciously on Connor and it wasn't until I felt his hands prying mine from squeezing him to death that I noticed I was in somewhat a trance.
"Chill." he said making me look at him and away from the bending floor that ended in a vertical fall just a few feet away. His dark eyes sparkled with the soft moonlight and it tugged at something deep within my chest, helping me seize the now. "I won't let you fall."
"I-I know." I shakily breathed in, barely away of the soft shift in his impassive features. Like my words touched him. "Can we go down now?"
"Not yet." he cupped my neck with one hand, letting his thumb grazed my jaw in a soothing way as his other hand found mine. His skin hot and callous against mine and the soft breeze of upcoming spring rustled around us. "I do want to show you something."
"And it is up here?"
I couldn't think of one thing that someone would keep in here, but as I managed to glance past him. Both buildings before us were like framing the views of the city. This neighborhood was lower than the main city and way darker, so the perspective from here with all the fog was almost like watching a painting from the romanticism.
"I never have the camera when it matters." he snorted, taking out his phone from the front pocket of his hoodie on me -where he's left it since the fight- and handed it to me. I grinned gratefully, taking it when he type in his code. "Thanks." I snapped a couple pics, trying different lents and grateful he had the latest iPhone. Those really make some good pictures. "Is this what you wanted to show me?"
He shrugged, going to sit and lightening a cigarette as I enjoy different angles of this new perspective of Nortown. I was so used to seeing it from inside or from the other end than this was somehow grounding. And I love it.
When I felt like I was now taking too much time I went to sit by his side and sent me all the pics I'd taken and handing the phone back. He took it, putting it back in the pocket of my-his hoodie and hooking his finger on the cloth to pull me closer so I sat too leaning into him.
I melted, molding into him and letting my eyes adjust to the moonlight now that I didn't have the flash and the lamppost were way too low to help anything up here.
I saw his profile against the clearer background. I smiled when he turned to face me. "How did you find this place?"
He shrugged. "I didn't. Just thought it would be nice and chill."
"You... you've never been here before?" I could feel the initial nerves nesting under my skin once more. "Oh my God. The you don't even know if this is safe! We need to get out of here. We need to-"
"Alyson." he stopped me completely unbothered. "This place is on sale. They had it repaired a month ago. We'll be fine."
On sale? "How come there isn't a guard then?"
"Because no one really bothers to come down here."
Hesitantly, I sat again on my heels, eying around and it indeed looked empty but stable enough. Apart from the graffiti on the front wall... Connor shifted awkwardly, moving his knee carefully and I took his hand, at least checking his knuckles. My stomach twitched at the bluish marks all over them and the cuts in between. I wonder how he could act like nothing. I would be crying for sure.
"Be honest." my thumb hovered over the bruising without really daring to touch and I looked up to meet his sparkling dark eyes under the silver light. "Does it hurt?"
At first he didn't say anything. Just keep staring back as if reading my soul and I could feel something bloating in my chest and stomach, almost erasing the previous determination. But at least his jaw ticked: "Barely."
So it hurt.
"I really don't like these fights."
"They pay well."
I bit my lip glancing back down at his hand again. "This is what you plan to do for a living?"
True was that he said he had no intention to apply to any college, and truth being told, with how little interest he's shown in basic high school subjects it was hard imagining him studying any further. But then what?
"No." he said flatly. "But it's okay for now."
"And then what?"
He gave me a look, one that said he knew I was trying to pry and I just hope he didn't block me out at the realization. "Then?"
"In a few months, or years. You can't be earning from this always."
"Can't I?" I could tell now that he wasn't that fond of the conversation anymore, but I nodded, gulping and trying to act chill.
"It's dangerous. You will end up injured. For real. Or involved with the mob." he scoffed, but I wasn't over yet. "It's bad enough you do it like this, but not as something more serious."
"Are you done?"
Not by far, but I pressed my lips together, controlling the upcoming and nodded my head. To my surprised he smirked, brushing my hair off my hair and tilting his head as if to watch me under a different angle.
"It's almost cute you worry so much."
I could feel myself blushing and buzzing at his words. "Almost?"
"It's also annoying as hell."
I frowned, staring at the views again and torn between feeling offended or amused, because by now I kinda knew that he didn't mean those things as insults. They usually were his honest thoughts or his way to make humor out of the situation. Or out of me.
Because I'm annoying.
"I'm saving up." he said then, as if giving in some information before I let it get into me. And it worked. His vague response spiked my curiosity.
"Saving up for what?"
He shrugged. "Stuff."
I narrowed my gaze when no more detail came out of him. "Oh, please, don't be sooo explicit, I can't with all the details."
His lips twitched. "I like to draw."
Okay, now that was some information. I looked at him, intrigued. "Do you?" he hesitated, as if really considering that little piece of information he was giving away, and then nodded. "Like, when you pain in the walls?"
"And in paper. I got a notebook."
"Can I see it?" I blurted and he gave me a brief look before glancing away into the view before us, brushing his hair. If I didn't know him, I would say he was almost nervous. I backed down softly, not wanting to push this moment of open confession with my prying. "Sorry, it was worth a try. So," I shifted closer. "You like to draw."
"Yes. And I thought that maybe-"
"Maybe." I encouraged when he again didn't seem that sure to open up.
His brows pursed together -whatever mental fight he was having, was completely forbidden to me. But then he seemed to snap back here and looked at me for a long moment. And before I could object anything else I was distracted by his arm stretching between us and my eyes easily found the known ink in his skin, drawing words, tangled with branches and webs of other things all mixed and oddly harmonized in the chaos.
"Yes." I reached out to trace the pattern of the brenches curling up his arm and intertwined with the black letters of another word marked in his skin. "I almost got them memorized." I traced down and 'S' and ended up following the lines of the shapes of birds across his inner forearm. "I like this one."
"I made it."
"What?" I snapped my gaze up, startled, but he was glancing down at it without a readable emotion in his face. "You?" I too looked down at the ink and noticed the thick likes of it, unsure at some points and they did have a similar trace with the graffities he's left all over the back of the school's building. "This is what you mean that you like to draw?"
"Handpoke."
"What is that?"
"It's when you literally push the pin to your-"
"I get it." I cut before he could get explicit. I was very apprehensive and just thinking of poking that disign by hand made me dizzy and he smirked.
"Trevor knows someone that had one of those tattoo machines and he let me use it from time to time."
"Is this what you're saving up to? To get one of those machines."
He bounced his head, like balancing the best way to express his actual feelings. "Not exactly. I want a pen, and also a study. If I save enough, I could move to LA and see what happens from there."
A tattoo study. Now that was something I hadn't contemplated, but that sounded... good. It was something he might even enjoy doing for a change. I followed the lines of the draw on his skin, mesmerized.
"It suits you." I muttered at the end, seeing more and more that perspective. "It could really work."
"That's what I thought."
The sarcasm in his tone was evident enough to notice even if you weren't familiar with his monotonous tone. I smiled, shaking my head at it.
"It's nice." I moved to run my nail over the last bird. "Do you have more?"
He nodded and brought his other arm, taking his time showing me his other trial on the skin. That was risky, a part of me was mesmerized by his revelations, but the other was freaking out at the idea of messing up and having forever imprinted in my body my trial. Knowing myself, I would have definitely messed up.
He had five in total, the birds, a few words on his other arm and the numbers of over his hip bone, following down the V. I traced them too as he lifted the hem of his shirt to show me.
"You're birthday."
"Norah's."
I giggled. "Yes, the same in both cases. It's cute you got it."
"She's been always there. A bit too suffocating, but there." That was his way to say he loves her very much without wanting to actually say it. "Are you done feeling me up?"
And just like that my smile froze and I could feel my whole body flushing. There he was again. Making fun of me. My hand pushed away as if his skin burned now.
"Always making fun of me." I grumbled, offended once more and this time ashamed too. I wasn't feeling him up. And he knew. He was just trying to ease some of the tension by saying something blunt like that.
Connor snorted a laugh, taking my chin and moving my face towards him. "You're so easy to wind up."
"At least I don't snap." but again it only amused and the fluttering in my chest increased at the tiny lopsided grin. So close his breaths caressed my face just as softly as his fingers moved from my chin to tangle with the hairs on my nape. "Why do you find it so funny to get under my skin?"
"No clue." he kissed me stealing my senses with his attention. It was almost romantic in here. The intimate place, the moon shining above us as the only source of light, the soft weather of spring...
His arm curled around my waist, pulling me right against him and my head spun at the loving air around this all. My palms traced up his chest, feeling his heat soaking the sleeveless shirt, slowly not to push any button and deepened the kiss, earning a low sound from the back of his throat that burned through me like acid. But pleasant acid that made me see fireworks.
As I leaned fully into him, his hands traced up my spine, slowly and taking his time, and then I felt the powerful way they gripped my shoulders and one slid over the base of my throat while his mouth travelled down my jaw and neck. His dominating moves and my easy submission made it all so irresistible. It was freeing, being at the mercy of someone else. And Connor likes to be in control. We just fit like that. And that was alluring too.
But I winced when he found the sensitive spot still bruised there. It was again that mix of pain and bliss that I was yet to understand other than how good it made me feel. How high.
He smiled against my mouth. "Sorry." my breaht hitched as his thumb moved across that sensitive spot. I wasn't sure if the bruising was a hickey, the chocking, or a mix of both. The thing was that it stung more now than when he put the mark there. "Are you sore?"
"I'm fine." I murmured, shifting closer, but even in this darkness I could feel that his attention now wasn't on my face anymore but on my neck. And there was also another shift in his neutral expression. The little hints that give him away weren't amused anymore, or allured... now he looked almost stressed. "Really."
"I don't wanna hurt you." his knuckles grazed my cheek and my eyes closed, leaning into his touch. "I just-" he bit his lip, shaking his head as he tried to explain it again: "Seeing you in my control... it gives me... power. It turns me on." I shivered, sharing that feeling. "I really don't wanna hurt you."
"You won't hurt me." It came out barely as breathed words while my mind melted.
"I could." he whispered too, tracing the bite mark on my neck and giving chills. "You need to stop me if I get carried away. I can't hurt you."
"But you didn't." I insisted. "It didn't hurt me, it wasn't that kind of ache. This was... it turned me on as well." Connor frowned, considering it as his nails traced the sensitive area of his lovemark. "Or when you grab me, or choke me..." my cheeks burned, but I forced my eyes on his long enough for him to see the truth in my gaze before letting it cast down, self consciously. "I like that too."
"Do you?" his stare was back on my neck, his fingers lightly hocking on the collar of my sweater and tugging it down to see the other marks there as well. Could someone look mad and excited at the same time? Because Connor did, and considering how little he let on, that was a hard expression to read. Did he enjoyed those marks on me? Was he worried about my wealth being? His fingers let go and my cloth covered it all leaving me cold without his touch. "We need a safe word."
That I wasn't expecting.
"You mean like in 50 Shades?" he eyed me amusedly and I blushed harder. "N-Norah made me watch it!" I rushed but he grimaced.
"I didn't need to know that about my sister, but yeah. If we're gonna keep doing... this, we need one, and whenever we said it, no matter what it is, we stop."
I giggled, looking away, overwhelmed by it all, "You're not gonna hurt me that much." but he used his thumb to brush my jaw line and made me look back at those dark pools that were his eyes. He was dead serious.
"I hope I don't, but it isn't just for you. This goes both ways."
My head panged at that. "I will never harm you." I whispered, for the first time realizing the weight of what we were really doing.
I was new at all this. And kinda so was Connor, but he came from a traumatic past on the matter. And considering his way of dealing with intimate relationships now was so dominating, he was right: we were both at risk. Him for obvious reasons of possible emotional scars and me for being on the receiving end of this kind of bond.
Connor gulped and, for the second time since I met him, he actually looked vulnerable. My heart melted at the foreign sight and all I wanted to do was pull him in my arms and made the stupid feeling go away.
"So a safe word." I said instead, trying to ease the heaviness of the moment by talking and he hummed.
"That would be useful. What was it in the movie?"
I blushed, just thinking back at it made me all self-conscious, but I tried to squeeze my brain for it. "Red, I think." I looked at him carefully, but -surprise- there was no visible reaction. "How does that sound?"
"Fine, I guess." his brows twitched, still unsure. "But make sure to-"
"I trust you." I insisted, meeting his eyes for more force in my words. "It's good we have a word, but I know you won't hurt me."
He perked one brow, mischievious glint in his eyes and he pretended to push my shoulder, edging me closer to the border. Deep down I knew he was joking, but my panic took over either way.
"Red, red!" I clung to him, wrapping my arms around his waist and felt the rumble when he chuckled. Chuckled. That amazing, weird sound of him. I would smile, but my heart was still beating harshly for the fright and his arms came around me as well, tangling easily through my hair.
"You were saying?" there was a smile in his tone, but I buried my face in his neck, taking in his scent.
"Connor." I cried out.
"Didn't think you would use it so soon."
"I didn't think you would t-try to throw me off the roof!" I retorted and he snorted. I felt him shaking his head before he pressed his lips on my head and melt a little more.
"Come on," he began to stand and help me up as well. "I'll take you home."
********************
QUESTION: Dreamed job?
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