Chapter 25: •CHAPTER-24•

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Burhan ki shadi dhoom dhaam se sar anjaam paa gayi thi. Walima ke baad hi woh usey agle roz hi laine aa gaya tha. Hafsa aapi usey drawing room mein bithaye kaafi der tak kuch kehti rahi thi aur woh unhen tasalli deta raha tha. woh un ki behan ko jaan se bhi barh kar chahta tha. usey takleef daine ka to woh soch bhi nahi sakta tha.

woh har tarah se uska khayaal rakhne ki yaqeen dehani krwa raha tha. tayyar ho kar jab woh neeche aayi to Burhan usey bohat fresh aur nikhra nikhra sa laga.

Jeans par safaid shirt mein malboos, baal saliqe se jamay hue, kalayi par qeemti ghadi. woh apni mukammal tayari mein hamesha ki tarah bohat acha lag raha tha.

jannat par nazar parte hi uski aankhon ki chamak uba rahi thi. woh uth khada huwa. Hafsa aapi ne unhen duaon ke saaye taley rukhsat kiya tha.

driving ke douran woh usse halki phulki baatein karta raha. mamool ke mutabiq jaisey kuch huwa hi nahi. jaisey koi teesra Fard uski zindagi mein aaya hi nahi.

yahan se woh seedha usey restaurant le kar gaya tha. uski mann pasand dishes ka order de kar woh maiz par uski taraf jhuka tha.

"kya khayaal hai lunch ke baad shopping par chalein?"

woh shayad uske sath ziyada se ziyada waqt guzaarna chahta tha. jannat uski aankhon mein dekh rahi thi. woh uska Burhan tha. woh zarra bhar nahi badla tha. uski zindagi jannat ki wohi ahmiyat thi. wohi maqam tha. woh usse aaj bhi utni hi mohabbat karta tha.

"Tum ne mere liye bohat barri qurbani di hai jannat! mein tumhara yeh ahsaan kabhi chuka nahi paunga!"

lunch ke baad jab woh gaadi ki taraf ja rahe the to usne kaha tha.

"Allah ne agar mujhe aulaad se Nawaza to un par tumhara bhi utna hi haq hoga jitna mera ya maheen ka."

woh khamosh ho gayi thi. aulaad ka zikar aisey hi us par zamur taari kar deta tha. shopping bags hathon mein pakdae jis lamhe woh Burhan ke sath ghar mein daakhil hui, nigah seedhi maheen par gayi.

surkh kamadaar jore mein malboos, nak sqck se tayyar nai naweli dulhan usse bohat khush ikhlaqi se mili thi.

Albata fazila tai ke tevar kuch bigre hue se lag rahe the. unhen Burhan ka shadi ke dosre roz hi jannat ko waqt dena bilkul bhi acha nahi lag raha tha.

Jannat moazrat chahtay hue apne kamre ki taraf gayi to Burhan bhi uske peeche chala gaya tha. Lounge mein samne baithi maheen ke chehre par aik tariqi si chhaa gayi.

Sartaaj ne to nazar bhar kar use dekha tak na tha. halaanke woh apni saas ke kehne par uske liye kitne shoq se tayyar ho kar baithi thi.

Fazila tai bhi sara waqt andar hi andar jalti kurhhti rahi thi. unhon ne to maheen se bhi keh diya tha.

"Sabr se kaam lena beti gulaam hai yeh jannat ka, waqt lagey ga par wo tumhara bhi ho jaye ga. aakhir tum usey baccha dogi."

apni bahu ka urtta rang unhon ne bhaanp liya tha. maheen badkat muskurayi thi. magar uski aankhon mein kuch tha, koi aisa ta-assur jo shola ban kar lehra raha tha.

•••

shadi ke baad Burhan apne haqooq o faraiz ka usi tarah khayaal rakh raha tha, jaisey woh shadi se qabal rakha karta tha. majboori tale dubi jannat ke liye soorat e haal kuch aisi thi ke usey bhi samjhota karna para tha.

woh maheen ko pasand nahi karti thi, na hi kar sakti thi magar phir bhi woh us ke kisi bhi mamlat mein dakhal andazi nahi karti thi. woh usey us ghar mein mukammal tor par is tarah nazar andaaz karti thi jaisey wahan uska wujood hai hi nahi.

jis zahani aziat se woh roz guzarti thi, is lehaaz se yeh khayaal uske liye behtar bhi tha. Shuru ke do mah sab kuch thik raha. na burhan ke rawaiyya me tabdili aayi na mohabbat me kami wakiya hui thi.

woh aaj bhi usey shiddato se chahta tha. aur us waqt tehi daman jannat ke liye Burhan ki mohabbat aab e hayaat se kam na thi. lekin jab maheen umeed se hui to jaha uski soi hui aziyate jaag uthi.

wahan Burhan ka dil bhi badal gaya. maheen pehley uski sirf biwi thi, ab woh uske bachche ki maa ban'ne wali thi. uska status ouncha ho raha tha. woh uske dil mein apna maqam banane mein kamyaab ho rahi thi. woh ziyada waqt maheen ko daine laga tha. Uski pasand na pasand ka khayaal rakhne laga tha.

Pehle ehsasat mein farq aaya, phir tarjeehat badale lagi. shadi ke paanch saal usne sirf jannat ke naam kiye the. ab woh kuch waqt khalis apne bacche ki maa ke liye bhi nikalna chahta tha. aur yahin se faasle badhne lage the, dooriyon ka aaghaz huwa tha. yahin se badgumani bhi thi aur siskiyo ka aaghaz huwa tha.

aur phir rafta rafta sab badal gaya tha. jazbaat, ehsasat aur tarjeehat bhi. jane kaise woh nazron mein reh kar bhi nazron se oojhal hui, jane kaise Burhan ki mohabbat jab azmaish ki Bhatti se guzar kar niklee to phir mohabbat na rahi.

woh sidiya utar rahi thi. kandhe mayoosi ke boojh taley jhuke hue the. aankhen be basi ke ehsas se nam ho rahi thi. uska rukh kitchen ki taraf tha aur kitchen se Burhan wasif ki aawaz aa rahi thi.

"Kaisi baatein karti ho mahi! tum ne to mujhe mukammal kar diya hai."

woh jo pani peene ki gharz se kitchen ke andar ja rahi thi, uska yeh jumla sun kar darwaze mein hi ruk gayi thi.

Counter table ke is taraf maheen ka haath apne hathon mein liye woh sanjeedgi se keh raha tha. muskurata huwa purkashish chehra aur brown aankhon ki chamak kitna khush lag raha tha woh kitna kamal lag raha thaama maheen ke sath.

"Aainda aisi baatein mat karna bohat ahem ho tum mere liye!"

"Sirf ahem hoon? pyar nahi karte aap mujh se?"

woh jannat ko darwaze mein dekh chuki thi aur barri lagawat se pooch rahi thi.

"Ahem wohi hote hain jin se mohabbat hoti hai."

usay pathar nahi hona tha, magar woh hogayi thi.

mohabbat ka aitraaf. haan yeh mohabbat ka aitraaf hi tha. maheen se shadi ke poore 6 mah baad.

yeh mohabbat ka aitraaf tha. woh jis ki pehli aur aakhri mohabbat jannat thi, ab uski kul "mohabbat" uske bacche ki maa ho gayi thi.

"Haan mein janti hoon, aap ki mohabbat hi to mera sahara hai."

khush dili se muskurate hue uski aankhon mein ajeeb si chamak ubhri thi.

maheen ko apne baazu ke hisaar mein letay hue usne aahista se rukh badla tha aur tab uski nigah jannat par pari, aik lahaje ke liye woh ruk sa gaya. maheen ka haath uske haath se chhota tha. yuhin ghair iradi tor par.

Uski yeh harkat. maheen ko tao dila gayi.

"arrey jannat! tum kab aayi? hamein pata hi na chala."

apne tasurat ko narmi mein dhaltae hue

Usne khush ikhlaqi ka Mazahir kiya. Burhan ke samne uska lehja hamesha mithaas liye hota tha. woh jo yahan pani peene aayi thi gham par hi iktifa kar ke palat gayi.

taizi se sidiya charh kar jab woh kamre mein aayi to uska chehra aanso-on se tar ho raha tha. Usne kamre ka darwaaza band kar diya tha magar lock nahi lagaya. woh chahti thi jab Burhan uske peechay aaye to usey darwaaza band na miley.

ab woh bhaari dil ke sath bed par baithi thi. be qarari se ungliya chatkha rahi thi. ansoo the ke gire ja rahe the, dil tha ke ruka ja raha tha.

"Nobat yahan tak pahonch jaye gi?"

"Mehez chand mah ke andar andar"

woh be yaqeen hi hui nafi mein sir hila kar usne aankhen ragar kar saaf ki. phir khud ko sambhalte hue nigahein darwaze par markooz kar li.

"Abhi woh bhaga bhaga aaye ga aur kahe ga. meri jannat tumhe sunne mein ghalti hui hai."

Haath pakde ga, ansoo ponchega, phir uski aankhon mein jhaank kar apna ehad dohraye ga.

"Bhala mujhe bhi tumahre siwa kisi aur se mohabbat ho sakti hai?"

phir uski aankhon mein nami aayegi aur labon par mohabbat ke naam ki tasbeeh

"Tum meri pehli aur aakhri mohabbat ho! tumhari jagah mere dil mein aur koi nahi le sakta."

aur woh foran man jaye gi. koi nakhra nahi dikhayegi. koi aitraaz nahi uthaye gi.

magar woh hum safar, hum nawa, majazi khuda, woh yeh sab kehne aaya hi nahi. baar baar aankhen masalte, gaal ragadte woh mutzari baithi rahi magar Burhan wasif! woh aaya hi nahi.

Siyah shaam ke andheron mein ghark. Uske intezaar mein be qarar. woh aik baar phir bhool rahi thi ke pichle teen mah se Burhan aik baar bhi to usey yeh sab kehne nahi aaya tha.

"Tum banjh ho jannat aur banjh aurat mard par aik boojh ke siwa kuch nahi hoti."

"Banjh aur bojh?"

mehroomi ka ehsas shadeed tar huwa. be basi ka ehsas qowi tar.

usne gaal par phisalti lat ko kaan ke peechay ursa kar maheen ki taraf dekha. kamadaar suit me malboos, light sa make up kiye, safaid dupatta apne wujood par phelaaye woh hamesha ki tarah nikhri nikhri si bohat fresh lag rahi thi.

usne danista apna dahna haath maiz par samne rakha huwa tha jis mein aaj gold ki aik nayi ring chamak rahi thi.

jannat ne khamoshi se refrigerator kar pani ki bottle nikaali, rack se kanch ka

glass uthaye aur thanda pani Undhelne lagi. uska baghore jaiza lete hue maheen ne chai ka sip liya.

"Bohat mohabbat karta hai woh mujh se, bohat khayaal rakhta hai woh mera aur kyun na rakhe? aakhir mein use aik baccha de rahi hoon."

lehjey mein taqqabur bhara tha, aawaz mein robiyat thi, aankhon se ghuroor jhalakta tha.

jaisey sara kamaal sirf uska tha, jaise ataa sirf uske haath mein thi. jaisey qaza ke faisle uski marzi, uski Mansha se hote the.

"Jitni toofani mohabbat woh tum se karta tha aur shadi ke baad bhi jis tarah woh tumhara khayaal rakhta tha, mein

to yeh samjhi thi ke woh meri taraf dekhe ga bhi nahi."

jannat ki zard rangat mein aik karb sa taher gaya. surkh o mutwaram aankhon ki nami kuch aur barh gayi.

"Aur ab dekho, itni mohabbat itna pyar aakhir kyun na kare mein uske hone wale bacche ki maa jo hoon!"

Itra kar kehte hue is ne apni gardan unche ki thi. Sar yu uthaya tha jaise woh kisi saltanat ki malka ho.

'Bhala woh kaise log hote hain jinhein Allah baghair kisi tadap, baghair kisi dua, baghair kisi intezaar ke sab ataa kar deta hai?'

Usne khaali glass maiz par rakh diya tha.

"Sach puchho to mein bhi usse mohabbat karti hoon."

"Shirkat daari ab mujh se bardasht nahi hoti."

maheen ne aik aur waar kiya tha. aur us ka har waar theek nishane baithta tha.

"Jab mein ne shirkat bardasht kar li to tumhe kya masla hai?"

Usne muthammil ho kar poocha tha.

"Tumhari to majboori hai, meri aisi koi majboori nahi hai, mein Burhan ke bacche ki maa ban'ne wali hoon, mein usey aik bacha de rahi hoon jannat tum use kya de rahi ho?"

"Pichhle paanch saloon mein tum ne use diya hi kya hai?"

tamaskhar urata huwa lehja.

jannat ka wujood chhalni huwa. Jawaban woh kuch keh na saki. maheen, Burhan ke hone wale bacche ki maa thi. usma palra bhaari tha. woh usse koi behas nahi kar sakti thi.

ab yahi munasib tha woh nashte ka irada tark kar de aur bhukhi pyaasi yahan se chali jaye.

"Tum use chhor kyun nahi deti?"

jannat ke qadmon ki harkat thami. kuch mathos ho kar usne maheen ko dekha. woh seene par bazu bandhe uske samne khadi thi.

"Tum hosh mein to ho?"

"Haan, hosh mein hu, aur dekhna chahti hoon aik banjh ladki kahan tak lad sakti hai."

Istehazi andaaz mein kehte hue woh kitchen mein chali gayi aur jannat sadme se gunj apni jagah khadi reh gayi thi.

'Banjh' wo aik lafz nahi banjar tha dil mein utartaa tha aur laholhan kar deta tha.

'Banjh'

wo mehroomi ka ehsas nahi, jalta huwa angara tha, wujood par girta tha aur bhasam kiye jata tha.

shaam ke paanch baj rahe the. sah pehar ka Sooraj ghuroob ho raha tha. woh apne kapre istri kar rahi thi. Muan kisi khayaal ke zehen mein aate hi usne istri rakh kar mobile utha liya tha. ab woh Burhan ka number Dial kar rahi thi. phir khamoshi se agle kayi lamhoon tak ghanti gunjti rahi thi. mobile shayad silent par tha.

Burhan ne khasi takheer se call receive ki thi.

"Haan bolo"

Uski mohabbat, inayat aur ulfat ki tarah, uske lafz bhi kam par gaye the. faqat do lafzon ka mustahiq jana gaya tha use jannat ko apna aap be had arzaan mehsoos huwa jaise woh khaak hai. peero taley rondi ja rahi hai.

"Aik tum ne to mujhe mukammal kar diya hai."

usne zehen mein ubharti is aawaz ko jhatak diya aur dheet ban mano, be hiss ho gayi. be hiss hui.

"As salam alaikum! kaisey ho?"

ghar mein to baat karne ke moqe kam hi muyassar the. kamre mein aana bhi taqreeban chhor diya tha usne tamam tar mohabbat, tawajah aur inayate doosri biwi ke liye reh gayi thi.

"Hmm, theek hoon! lekin masroof hoon."

woh aksar sochti thi, aaj phir sochne gayi thi, kya yeh wohi Burhan hai jo apni doosri shadi se up set tha? jo uske ehsasat ki itni qader karta tha ke baa-mushkil doosri shadi ke liye raazi huwa tha? jise jazbaat ki itni fikar thi ke ghar ko barqu qum qamo se sajane na diya tha. woh jo sirf uska tha, jo sirf usey chahta tha?

ab to un ke mabain bad gumani ki itni diware khadi ho chuki thi ke woh kuch kehna bhi chahti to keh nahi sakti thi magar aaj usey kuch kehna tha, faasley ki is deewar ko todne ke liye aik koshish usey zaroor karni thi.

"Mein soch rahi thi agar aaj tum aur mein, Hafsa aapi ki taraf chale jaye?"

Kya kabhi usne socha tha ke use is qader mohtaat andaaz mein dar dar kar Burhan se baat karna ho gi?

"Aur maheen ko ghar mein akela chore jaye?"

woh uske mutalbe par bhadak hi to gaya tha.

"Janti bhi ho uski tabiyat theek nahi rehti, aaj shaam doctor ke paas appointment bhi hai."

"Aal mein Hafsa aapi ne phone Kiya tha, aaj shaam khane par..."

"Unse moazrat kar lo! phir kabhi chale jayen ge."

Usne foran se call cut kr di. jannat mobile kaan se lagaye khadi reh gayi. khushk labon ko tar karte hue usne mobile rakh diya. aik baar burhan ki tamam tar tawajah iron stand ki janib markooz ki aur apna woh jora press karne lagi jis ka rang Burhan ka pasandeeda rang tha aur jisey aaj woh uske liye pehna chahti thi, uske liye tayyar hona chahti thi.

Aaansu the ke tap tap aankhon se girne lage aur yahi Burhan kaha karta tha.

"Mar jaye ga magar doosri shadi nahi karega!"

kapre press kar ke almaari mein hang kar ke wo bed par baith gayi. kuch der usne Hafsa aapi se phone par baat kar ke un se moazrat kar li ke aaj raat woh un ki taraf khane par nahi aa sakegi ke uski tabiyat theek nahi hai. uska dil tang sa hone laga. woh hawa khori ke liye bahar lounge mein aagai. samne hi maheen phone kaan par lagaye tehel rahi thi.

"Nahi Burhan! mujhe woh black wala hi chahiye. aap ko har haal mein mujhe wohi dilana hoga."

Doosri taraf se najane kya kaha gaya tha ke woh khilkhila kar hans pari thi. aik nazar jannat par daali phir aik ada se hata kar ruk gayi.

"Arrey haan, baby ka naam to abhi tak hum ne socha hi nahi hai."

jannat ko dekh kar hi usey apne hone wale bacche ka khayaal aaya karta tha.

'Hmm, theek hu lekin mashroof hu!'

jannat ne sar utha kar aasman ki taraf dekha. woh andar ki ghutan se tang ho kar bahar aayi thi magar bahar ka habs shadeed tha. uska dam ghutne laga.

"Mere liye ab uske paas chand lamhe bhi nahi rahe?"

"Yahi Burhan tha jise poori duniya mein siwaye jannat ke aur kuch nazar hi nahi aata tha aur ab sab nazar aata tha siwaye uske!"

halaq mein aanso-on ka phanda sa ataaq gaya. kya maheen theek hi kehti thi. zindagi mein to woh use rakhe hue tha magar dil se to kab ka nikaal chuka tha. warna woh kuch to ehsas karta, kuch to khayaal karta.

woh thakey hare andaaz mein wapas palat aayi. mulazma khana ki tayari kar rahi thi. usne khud ko kamre mein muqeed kar liya.

phir usne gaadi ki aawaz suni aur uth kar khidki mein aagai. maheen khaas tor par Burhan ke liye tayyar hui thi. uska pasandeeda rang zaib tan kiye kisi phool ki tarah khuli khuli lag rahi thi.

Tayyari se wazeh tha woh sirf hospital nahi jayege. aaj raat ka khana bhi kahin bahar tanwil farmaya jaye ga. aaj raat bhi woh takheer se lotege.

mulazma ne dastak de kar usse shaam ke khane se mutaliq poocha to usne mana kar diya. aaj raat phir usey bhooka hi sona tha. darwaaza khulne ki aawaz samaat se takrayi to uski aankh khul gayi thi.

ghutnon se sar uthatay hue usne be ikhtiyar samne dekha. Burhan sard nigahon se use dekhte hue darwaze mein khada tha.

chehre ke tassurat sard the.

"Tum aa gaye Burhan, mein tumhara hi intzaar kar rahi thi."

Burhan ke tasurat hanooz sakht hi rahe. woh uski khamoshi se kuch pareshan hui.

"kya baat hai, sab theek to hai?"

"Maheen ke sath tum kis tarah ki baatein karti rehti ho?"

"jee?" woh khaak na samjhi.

"hum honeymoon par kahan gaye? kahan ghumte phirte rahe. mein ne tumhe kya gift diye. hum ne waqt kaise guzaraa?"

"yeh sab.. yeh sab use batane ki kya zaroorat hai? kyun dil jalatii ho uska jannat, woh up set ho jati hai"

woh ek tak usey dekh rahi thi.

usne ye nahi poocha jannat tum ne kuch khaya ya nahi. mein tumhe roz akela chhor kar chala jata hoon tumhe dar to nahi lagta? tum khafa to nahi hoti? tumhe waqt nahi deta tum se baat nahi karta tumhe kahin bura to nahi lagta? kaha bhi to kya? danta bhi to kis baat par? fikar hui bhi to kis bat ki?

"jannat! aakhir tumhe ho kya gaya hai?

"Kyun apni aur meri zindagi mushkil bana rahi ho yaar!"

woh zich ho raha tha. aur jannat apni jagah sakit baithi thi. 'maheen kuch bhi kehti hai aur woh yaqeen kar laita hai?'

Kuch bhi batati usne kuch kehne ke liye labon ko harkat di magar aawaz ne sath na diya. aawaz baaghi hui, aawaz karb hai aur wo madoom hui.

"Mein samajh sakta hoon mehroomi ka ehsas bura hota hai, magar is mehroomi mein doosron ko aziyat pohanchata, unhen neecha dikhnana kam az kam us ki tawaqqa nahi kar raha tha mein tum se..."

Jannat ke andar chhan ke se kuch toota tha.woh sar taa pair laho lohan hogayi.

'Sirf mehroomi hi hai uske andar? aur kuch nahi?'

'Jazbaat, ehsasat, khawab khwahisaat aur kuch bhi nahi?'

"Mujhe apne bacche ki bohat fikar hai aur maheen ke sath tumhara rawaiyya meri bardasht se bahar ho raha hai."

woh keh kar chala gaya aur jannat sun hote wujood ke sath baithi reh gayi thi. Is baras jo khizaa utri thi woh sirf dharti par hi nahi uske wujood par bhi utri thi. woh usey bhi be rang kar rahi thi. Uske hisson ko bhi jhaad rahi thi.

farq sirf itna tha dharti ki khizaa guzar jane wali thi.

magar uske andar ki khizaa uske andar hi rehne wali thi!

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