"I'm telling the truth," scowled James. He was standing defensively and if he had hackles, they would have been raised. "Sarah and I made out in the parking lot for, like, five hours. She's totally into me. Why do you care? Are you jealous or something?"
The same pain. The same pain erupted in his chest and settled there. It didn't leave - it wouldn't leave, not even when people told the truth, not even when Ewan held him close and told him they'd find Ezra.
Everything felt like a lie except for the fact that Ezra would die tomorrow.
That always felt like the truth when Ben told it to himself.
"Ben," snapped James, grabbing the boy's attention. "I'm telling the truth. Do you want to ask Sarah? Maybe rough her up too?"
He was bleeding from a cut above his eye. Ben had landed a firm punch there, which had knocked James back into the bathroom. Where they were now. The cut didn't seem to bother the other too much - he just seemed annoyed and mildly shaken.
This didn't feel right. Ben couldn't accurately decipher truth from lie anymore and it felt wrong to try to. So he stepped back, away from the door, and James took the opportunity to scamper out.
How dumb... how dumb... God, how dumb...
"Damn it!" he yelled, slamming his fist into the wall. Again and again and again.
It cracked and chipped until a giant block fell back and hit him on the cheek. He flinched back, pulling his fist away slowly. Blood leaked from his skin and it lingered on the cracks in the wall. Taking in a slow breath, he glanced around before going to the sink and washing his hands, watching the blood spiral down the drain.
He didn't know how he felt. Ewan and Gabrielle kept assuming he was just sad - depressed that Ezra was out there, possessed, with a hole right through his body. But he was angry and frustrated that instead of searching for him, instead of going out there to find him, he was waiting for school to be over.
Though it was true, also, that Ben spent every night searching for Ezra. He left right after school ended and got on his bike - he'd searched the whole town at this point, even gone to all the bordering cities, but he'd found nothing. Not a trace.
Ezra's dad had come to him twice at school, asking where he was. Each time Ben could only think about the fact that, if this went poorly, Ezra's mom would find him in a casket.
The only thing he told Ezra's dad was that he, too, was worried. He didn't know what was going on but he swore he'd find him.
And he got felt like he was letting everyone down when he never found Ezra.
It was always four a.m. when he realized he was too tired to look anywhere else. And the idea of going home was too much, so instead, he went to Ewan and he got two hours of sleep.
An Irish 'hey' interrupted his thoughts.
Ben turned around to find Ewan, bringing himself back to the now. Feeling a sharp pain in his hand, he glanced down to find it was still running under the hot water. He yanked his hands out from under the water and watched the steam rise off of them, pain blossoming through them.
"What happened?" asked Ewan, stepping forward.
"I..." Ben sighed. "I don't know. I don't... I don't know."
"Ben," Ewan soothed, taking his hands in his own. Ewan's hands were colder and it felt better. "It's okay."
"You don't know that," Ben breathed. He watched as the demon took a paper towel and wet it, beginning to dab at the wound on Ben's cheek.
"Am I lying?"
"I don't know," Ben choked.
Tears pricked his eyes at all the things he didn't know. All the things he couldn't control.
"He'll be okay," Ezra said. He smiled the most reassuring smile Ben had ever seen and soon threw the towel away. "He'll be oka-"
"Tomorrow," breathed Ben. He looked Ewan in the eyes before looking down at their hands again. "I don't think he'll be okay tomorrow."
Ewan sighed slowly. "I'm..." He shook his head. "We'll find him. Alright? I don't know how... don't know when... but we'll find him and he'll get out of this alive."
"How?" asked Ben. He clenched his jaw. "He has a bullet in his heart. He's... he's as good as dead once Gregory's gone."
Ewan's colder hand grabbed Ben's chin, tilting his head up. Their eyes connected and for a second time stopped. Everything was alright... until Ben started thinking again.
"What if Gregory did this on purpose?" he continued. "Possessed Ezra... maybe even made him get shot just so... I'd be forced to..."
"Ben," said Ewan. He narrowed his eyes as the two shared a very intimate look. "You can't control anything. Everything that's happening with Ezra is out of your control. It sucks, I know, but also it doesn't matter because... because whatever happens is out of your hands. Completely."
Ben let out a slow sigh. "I just want to save him," he whined.
Ewan went quiet, looking the other over. "We'll make it work. We'll make sure everyone gets out alive... But listen," he said firmly, drawing Ben's attention, "Ben, you need to believe that it'll work itself out. I can't do the believing for the both of us, right?" He grinned gently. "Not all the time, at least. Being the only pessimist gets a little tiring sometimes. Especially since I'm from He-"
Ben didn't let him finish. He leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Ewan's neck, burying his face in the other's shoulder. He sucked in Ewan's scent, which was Stirling's, but... it was nice to imagine, if only for a second, that it was Ewan. Actually Ewan who instantly hugged him back. Not just his soul.
The two shared that hug for about a minute. Ben just breathed in the peace of the moment before pulling back, glancing at the ground. "I'll get some sleep," he said eventually. Nodding, he cleared his throat and looked up at Ewan. It was only Stirling, though. Lately, that fact had been making him uncomfortable. "Are you going home, too?"
Ewan nodded. "Yeah. Stirling's parents are... well, confused. I should talk to them."
"You should," mumbled Ben, nodding. "You should." He took in a deep breath. "Are you sure you don't want to... c-come home with me or..."
"No, Ben. You really need to sleep." Ewan kept grinning.
Ben blushed. "I would. We would."
It was Ewan's turn to blush. After an awkward second of silence, he cleared his throat. "Yeah. I know you... Of course you meant that."
"Of course I meant that," added Ben. He was still blushing.
"Of course," finished Ewan. "Yeah. Duh." He breathed something that sounded like, "We haven't even kissed yet."
Ben cleared his throat, glancing to the side. Then he put his hands in his pockets. "I'll see you tomorrow, then."
"I'll see you tomorrow," concluded Ewan.
The two stared at each other a second longer before Ben grinned cheekily and headed out, leaving Ewan in the bathroom.
"Ben!" snapped a voice behind him.
He turned around to find Mrs. Jennings, standing there with the same ruler in hand. Ben raised an eyebrow. "Still planning to hit me, Jennings?"
"What? No-" She sighed through her nose, heading towards him. "I came to tell you about your therapy appointment."
Right. That was probably today. "Oh," was all he said. He didn't even bother coming up with an excuse, rather narrowing his eyes and waiting for the wave of anger and disappointment.
"He said it went really well, Ben," Jennings continued. She smiled. "I'm happy you're getting the help you deserve. And no one's hurt today, which... seems like a good start, doesn't it?"
Ben went quiet before slowly mumbling, "Yes." He shifted. "Did he say anything else?"
"Legally, he isn't allowed to. But he did tell me that he hopes to see you next week." She smiled. "Keep it up, kiddo. Mr. Mariangela and I are very proud of you for taking that step."
Gradually, he brought himself to nod. He didn't say anything else and simply watched her walk away.
Whoever that therapist was seemed to be... flexible, at least. But he was fighting a hopeless cause. Ben wasn't going to go to therapy, no matter how polite or cool the therapist seemed.
He ran a hand through his hair and headed to his motorcycle, getting on and glancing around the school. At the kids walking around with their mortal-based problems - who cheated on who, who was going to the dance, who ate what.
It baffled him that no one really knew. No one knew what was going on after death. Ben did, though, and somehow that felt wrong. Why did he deserve to know? Him, with the broken family life and the one friend who was now shot in the heart and possessed? Him, who had killed a man and had completely ruined the lives of others?
Why had Heaven and Hell chosen him to do some good?
He sighed, slipping his helmet over his head. He started his motorcycle and rested his thumb on the gas -
"Ben!" called a very deep voice.
He lifted his head to find a dark man standing in front of his motorcycle. He was dressed in a tuxedo and he had a very kind yet concerned smile. His jaw was square and his hair was very short and very black.
"Ben Sawyer?"
Ben took his hand off the gas and took off his helmet. "Yes?"
The man approached. "I'm Thomas Mariangela... the one that saved your ass today with Juniper?"
"I would've been fine," Ben replied. He narrowed his eyes. "I don't need a therapist, though."
"I didn't say you needed one. Juniper did. And I'm gonna be honest, Juniper is a very good judge of character."
"I guess she has reason to hate me, then."
"Do I recall that you're the boy that beats up someone at least twice a week? The boy that blinded Charlie in one eye?"
Ben scoffed, going to put on his helmet again. "Therapy already sounds great."
Mr. Mariangela shook his head, chuckling deeply. "I never said your actions weren't uncalled for."
He held his helmet at his chest. Waiting.
"Give me a chance," the therapist offered. He spread out his arms. "What's the worst that could happen? You have to be open about how you feel for once?"
Ben snorted.
The ride home was gloomy, as it had been since Sunday night. However, today seemed just a little clearer. Just a little. And the thought of Ewan made the clouds part just slightly.
Once he got home, he turned off the motorcycle and headed inside, putting his hands in his pockets. It felt weird to not instantly go out and check for Ezra. To flit around the city and those bordering it to find him. To wait until he couldn't keep his eyes open to go home, but not to his own. To Ewan's bed, where he'd stare at the ceiling until he managed to get two hours of sleep. It felt gross, to some extent, but also relieving.
Ezra would be okay today. Ewan had said that and it had been the truth.
Tomorrow was another story. Another story entirely.
So he hesitated at the door. Maybe he should go out looking again. No, he had to. This was the last day Ezra had and Ben wasn't going to waste it on sleeping habits. He had to find him and save him.
Even if it cost him his life, he'd make sure Ezra made it out of this alive.
So he turned around, glancing down to pull his keys out of pocket. His eyes followed the door and found that it was cracked open. Licking his lips nervously, he shifted and opened the door, gathering a shield at his right hand.
He surveyed the house, walking around until eventually he made his way to his room. Slowly, he opened the door. And the breath got knocked out of him.
There was Ezra.
He looked terrible. His skin was pale and sweaty, glistening with weakness, and he trembled and shivered. His eyes were wide and bloodshot and green, only glancing around like a rabid dog. And his clothes were drenched in blood, both shirt and pants, specifically around his waist and heart. Soon, he looked right at Ben and a wave of panic seemed to cover him like a sheet.
"Ezra," Ben breathed, swallowing weakly. "E-Ezra."
He didn't hesitate before taking a stride towards his friend to collect him in a hug, to heal him, to help him, but the other spoke up first.
"Don't come any closer," choked out Ezra.
Ben stopped in his tracks, about three feet from the other, and he held his breath. "Why?" he breathed. His voice cracked and he cleared his throat nervously.
"Ben, you need to leave," warned the other firmly. "He's going to kill you."
"I don't care," interrupted Ben. His heart was pounding and he felt like punching something, but he kept himself still. Outside, the weather began to swarm and darken. Rain fell harder than before and thunder rumbled. "But you're - y-you're going to be fine, Ezra, we're going to get you out of this-"
"I won't," he whispered. "I can't."
Ben blinked, refusing to cry. He shook his head. Deep down, he knew it was true - Ezra would die. But he had to think of loopholes, think of ways to fix this.
"You can," he argued. He shook his head, smiling gently. "Ezra, you can and you will. I can heal you - I-I can fix you, Ezra, I can make sure you get out of this alive no matter the cost." He went quiet. Ezra looked too sorrowful for this to make sense.
"You've seen it," Ben continued, taking a step forward. "Y-You've seen what I can do, you know that I can-"
"The second he's out of me," whispered Ezra, "I die."
Ben sniffed, licking his lips. "What do you... n-no, I can heal your... h-heart..."
Ezra shook his head slowly. "You can't heal what he's done."
Outside, lightning cracked right in front of his house. The building shook and things fell to the floor but Ben kept his eyes pinned on the other.
"What did he do to you," Ben said, not a question but a demand.
With trembling hands, Ezra lifted his hand to his shirt and pulled it down to reveal a black and red wound that dug deep into his body. Ben flinched back, unable to truly identify what was going on due to the tears blurring his vision.
"Shit," he whispered.
"He put it in my heart," Ezra confessed. "The only way to get him out of me is by taking the Enchantment out, which..."
"... will kill you," breathed Ben. He shook his head. "We can work this out. We can... we can make this work. It's fine. I-It's fine."
"Soon I - this body, I guess - will be beyond repair," continued Ezra, sniffing. Tears were in his eyes too and he shrugged, smiling humorlessly. "But it's fine. At least I got to see you, right? And hopefully I'll see Mom, too... and Dad... maybe even Rain-"
"No," hissed Ben, clenching his fists. Anger festered in him and the storm brewed until his window cracked and broke, shattering into his room and scattering glass along the floor. "This isn't how it ends for you, Ezra. He doesn't get to win." He spoke briskly and firmly but he kept his voice low, not wanting to get more out of hand.
"He does," Ezra said slowly, "and it's okay."
"How?" asked Ben. He clenched his jaw briefly before continuing, "You're the only thing I've had for eight years. The only person I've needed. You don't just get to leave because of... this dumb situation I've created."
Rain began pouring into the room but Ben didn't care. His eyes were glued to Ezra, rather, and he couldn't bring himself to even blink.
"That isn't his call," said a voice that wasn't Ezra's. Gregory spoke instead, and he chuckled lifelessly, shrugging. "What do you expect from him, Ben, really? 'Oh, fine, I'll live. It's my choice, anyway.' No - Ben, I put him in this situation. I put the Enchantment in his heart and Nathaniel put the bullet in his heart. This won't end well for him - or you, rather.
"Let me be blunt - there are two ways this ends. One, you decide your life is worth more than Ezra's and you let him die. You think maybe, maybe you can save him if you just heal him once the Enchantment is out of his heart - spoiler alert, that will also kill him because once the Enchantment is out of his heart, he's dead. And I designed it that way so that even if you heal him once the Enchantment is out, you've still got to dig your greasy little hands around for a bullet.
"Two, you give your life up. I take the Enchantment out, keep him alive, and Gabrielle can fish the bullet out. We'll get some of this very, very advanced technology to heal him and... well, that's the end of it. Everyone is happy."
Ben swallowed weakly. "How?" he asked, unable to finish his thought.
But it wasn't even a question... Of course everyone would be happy once he was gone.
The demon scoffed, motioning to the area around them. "Look at this, Ben. You're causing a hurricane. Does North Dakota want that? Does anyone in Grayville want that? Hell, Ben, do you want that? And furthermore, who suffers when you die? No one I can think of," he continued, "and no one, I'm sure, that you can think of."
Ben was quiet. Gregory took it as a sign to continue.
"What happens to Ewan when you die? Hm? He goes back to Hell, lives the life set out for him, the life he wanted before it was you who screwed everything up and made him come to the Surface. Before it was you who ripped him away from his best friend and ruined their friendship. He doesn't want to be here. He doesn't even want to be with you. He wants to be home, Ben.
"And Gabrielle? She gets to live life unpossessed. Elizabeth goes to Heaven again and Gabrielle lives a happy, lovely life all by herself in her own head. She finds a boy she loves and then she's happy. You never happened. She's not even known you for a week - do you really think you mean something to her?"
"I do," choked out Ben, but he didn't believe it.
"And Ezra. Ezra finally gets to have friends once you're gone. All his life, you've been holding him back - you've been the reason he has no friends, no love, no life, Ben, and you have the opportunity to fix that for him. You die, I leave, he's healed - maybe he even gets the surgery? He's a normal boy again who can live a normal high school and college career. In fact, every kid gets to live a normal high school and college career because you're gone, Ben, and you're not there to play judge and executioner, deciding who gets cut up and who gets to stay beautiful."
Gregory shrugged. "And you. You get what you've always wanted."
"What have I always wanted?" Ben asked, but it wasn't a question again - it was a demand.
"You've always wanted to make a difference."
He opened his arms wide as if to emphasize the scenario. "And here I am, giving you the perfect opportunity. You can do all of that by only handing over your Enchantment to me and... dying."
"Okay," said Ben.
Gregory paused, arms still open wide, mid-presentation. He licked his lips and glanced around before scoffing. "Okay?"
"Okay," Ben repeated. He lifted his hands and removed his Enchantment, feeling drained of power the second it was off. But he took it off and let the chain fall into his hand. Shaking, he held it out to the other. "Take it and kill me."
The demon glanced down at the Enchantment, looking baffled. But he didn't hesitate. His hand shot out like a rocket and took the Enchantment. Instantly, it began to glow.
"This... If only you knew the power within this, Ben," scoffed Gregory, shaking his head. "If only you knew what you were giving up. How absolutely dumb to give up something this priceless." He licked his lips, then slipped it in his pocket. "Now, Ben... Now you die."
And Ben was ready.
Gregory was right - everything would be better the second he was gone. The school would be better, Ezra would be better, Ewan and Gabrielle would be better, even his father, probably, would be better off. He was going to make the world better.
No one even had to notice he was gone.
The demon raised a hand and glass from his window rattled before lifting itself off the ground. It hung in the air and practically seemed to wait to impale him, and he took in a deep breath, waiting. Ready, more than anything, to just get it over wi-
"Stop," said a man's voice.
And then everything else happened in a split second.
A squeak that could only be Ezra escaped his lips and his hand flinched. Ben only had enough time to turn his head and look at the man at his door before he felt five sharp pains in his chest. Before he felt the breath get knocked out of him at the sight of his father. Before he watched his father's jaw clench. Before his feet forced him to turn around and look at the tall man, now blurred by tears, and before he stumbled back and coughed up blood and glanced down.
Five glistening pieces of glass were stuck in his chest.
And they were deep. He could practically feel them protruding out of him on the other end, digging into his skin and even penetrating his bones.
Taking in a shaky breath, he collapsed to his knees, feeling the glass shift within him.
Hands clasped his arms and Ben's eyes fluttered open to find his father grasping him, looking him square in the eyes, saying something he couldn't understand. Ben gasped out breaths.
His body felt like fire.
"Ben," his father said firmly. "Stay awake."
But Ben could hardly keep his eyes open. He felt cold and overheated at the same time, his body trembling as he sucked in breaths. Pain engulfed him with every slight movement of his body and he gasped, gripping his father's shirt tightly.
"Please don't go," he choked out. Blood spurted from his lips. "Please."
"No," said his father. "I'm not leaving. I'm going to call Ewan."
Ben had no objections and simply choked out a cough, blood spurting to the ground. His head was resting on his father's shoulder and he continued to gape and choke.
Hands fumbled around his jeans pocket before they took his phone, and minutes passed as Ben just knelt in his father's grip and waited... waited...
Things were getting hard to comprehend. Everything, actually, was hard to comprehend and he just stayed there as his father clutched him, watching as his vision blurred.
He was dying - it was worth it. It was okay. It was okay it was okay...
Soon the door burst open and Ben watched absently as Ewan and his father began to talk.
"What the Hell did you do to him?" yelled Ewan. His face was blurry and contorted. "What the Hell did you do to him?!"
"Fix him," hissed his father. He kept his voice low and soft. "I didn't - I didn't do anything, just fix him."
"I can't," said Ewan. "I-I can't fix him. Wh-where's his Enchantment? Sh-Shit..."
"Gregory took it," mumbled his father. "He's the one that did this."
Ewan took in a deep, shaky breath. "Sh-Shit. Uh... Um... E-Elizabeth might know... kn-know what to do... Oh, Ben..."
His father didn't reply and Ben blinked lazily as Ewan drew his phone from his pocket and began to talk to someone on it.
The pain had begun to numb - everything, actually, had begun to numb. He couldn't feel a single thing and he couldn't think a single thing, not anymore, and all he could see was Ewan and he wanted to smile and tell him he'd done it, he couldn't stop him, he'd finally done it and everything was okay now, he could be happy, he could go back to Hell, but he couldn't form the words and he wasn't even sure if he was thinking that or if he'd already thought it.
"Don't worry," croaked Ben. He licked his lips. "This is... th-this is how it's... supposed to be-"
Ewan was suddenly very close to Ben's face and the two shared an intense, blurry stare.
"No," snapped Ewan. "No. This isn't how you go out."
Ben blinked, and when he opened his eyes, Gabrielle was there.
He didn't know how much time had passed.
"How do we help Ben?" Ewan asked. His voice was gritty and tense and Ben grinned because he'd never heard him talk to sternly. It didn't really suit him and Ben coughed up a laugh.
"O-Oh!" gasped Gabrielle's voice. "Oh, goodness!" Instantly, she was gone, and Elizabeth knelt beside him instead. Ben's brain could hardly keep up with the changes. "I'm going to pull the glass out," she said firmly. "Keep him still."
"Please," Ben pleaded. "Don't save me. God, please don't-"
His father's arms looped his own, pulling Ben's back towards and keeping him still. He took in a sharp breath then gasped as the glass was ripped from his body. Each piece slid out in what felt like slow motion, and he felt every second of it. He felt it graze his skin again, seeming to produce more cuts that would never heal because once they were out, it felt like lava had seemed into the wounds and were burning deeper into his body.
"Shit, that's a lot of blood..." whispered Ewan.
"Get towels and medical supplies," commanded his father. His deep voice rumbled through Ben but he just kept blinking absently, gazing at the floor as blood began to pool down his skin.
"Get his shirt off," said Elizabeth.
His father hesitated and Ben could practically feel the heated glare that the two shared. Then his father began to pull up his shirt, and Ben whined. It was too cold for this... or hot... probably both, but he wanted his shirt on.
"Ben," commanded his father.
Chills raced down his spine and soon he went limp, allowing his father to remove his shirt. Cold air gushed onto his body and he shuddered, gasping in pain as his father then picked him up and pulled him over to the bed.
Every slight movement felt like a new gash, a new, ice-hot pain erupting in his body. One of his father's hands wrapped firmly around his waist while the other stayed on his neck, careful to stay away from his wound.
"Why'd you keep that one in?" he asked. His voice was getting distorted and hard to hear.
"If we remove that, he may never recover. It's too close to his neck," whispered Elizabeth. "He needs his Enchantment."
"We don't have time for that," hissed his father.
"Well, we don't really have a choice," replied Elizabeth. "Unless you have some magic you can pull out of your ass to keep him alive-"
"I don't," snapped his father. He shook his head weakly and his voice broke as he mumbled, "I don't."
"Right," said Elizabeth. "So we need his Enchantment - even though you don't even... know what that is. Ewan and I will make a plan - just... stay with him, alright?"