I'm sorry.
Amelia Black
I came upstairs while Adam finishes with Damien. When I said I was coming up he just looked at me and said, "My room." Then he gave me a kiss.
After he came upstairs, I was done with my shower and nightly routine so I joined him in his room.
"You smell so good." He hugs me as I join him in bed. He buries his face in my neck and kisses me there.
"Adam." I chuckle. What he's doing is kind of ticklish.
He flips me over and cages me, taking a look at my nightwear. His eyes darken. "You're so sexy." He whispers.
He then captures my lips and we start kissing. I shiver, my stomach floating with butterflies. Adam's lips are so soft and sweet.
After he pulls away, he just stares at me. Like deep into me, stroking my hair.
"Thank you." He says in a soft tone.
"For wh-" He cuts me with another kiss. A short one then he lies back beside me, going quiet. I cuddle into him and that's how we fell asleep.
****
Happiness. I feel like I'm in heaven because I woke up with biggest smile on my face, literally. Adam is still deep asleep.
A part of me wants to wake him up but I don't.
You know, I know I'm hot. With being number one in Hardwood's hotlist and all, I've always had high standards but never in my life did I ever think I would land a guy like Adam let alone be married to him.
He's perfection down to his core. He's handsome, smart, kind, successful and so much more.
I stare at him. His lips are so pink. So kissable. A strand of hair has fallen on his forehead. His hair is so dark.
I'm pretty sure I spent about twenty minutes staring at him before I got up and headed to my room.
***
I just showered and had my hair done. I'm now in my closet taking pictures and sending them to Juliet, my stylist to help me pick an outfit.
I wonder if Adam are going to do something today. Like go out on a date or just do something special at home.
Just cause we're married doesn't mean we shouldn't do the whole dating thing. It's a way to get to know each other more and grow our relationship.
Amelia's outfit
It took me over an hour to finish getting ready. Adam wasn't in his room after I was done, so I go downstairs to find him and he was in the kitchen with surprise, surprise!
"Oh, Damien, you're here." I walk pass him as I go over to open the fridge.
"I am genuinely sorry to intrude on a day like this but your guy and I have a meeting." He says.
I finish taking out the ingredients I need for my green juice and shut the fridge.
"You're welcome to be here anytime, Damien." I tell him. I like Damien. He's very lively and when it comes to Adam, was there for me right from the start.
"I appreciate that." He winks. He cleans up nicely. Adam has hot friends. Damien is wearing beige loose pants and a green sweater. He likes playing with colors and it works for him.
I turn to Adam who hasn't taken his eyes off me since I came in.
"Why are you looking at me?" I smile at him. I'm so nervous.
He narrows his eyes. "Come here."
I walk to him and holds me by the waist.
"You look beautiful." He says his eyes starring down at my body.
"Thanks."
He puts his hands on my neck and he kisses me softly, smoothly teasing his tongue with mine and then we pull back.
"Good morning." He smiles widely, his dimples flashing.
OMG! I'm swooning. How can someone be so beautiful?
"Morning." I blush.
After I was done making my smoothie, Adam pulls me to his lap and kisses my ear.
Damien has gone out to make a phone call so it's just the two of us and I'm suddenly nervous. It's so weird for him......us to act this way.
"Why are you tense?" He asks in my ear.
I raise my head and stare into his eyes, trying to take in how real is.
"Relax, baby." He commands in his sexy deep voice. I guess he can see through me.
"Okay." I sigh then wrap my arms around him, resting my face on his chest.
He hugs me back. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah."
He kisses my head then I hear him take a bite then he passes his fork to me, pointing it at my mouth.
It's a piece of melon so I take it. It's very sweet and delicious.
Adam and I keep eating in silence. He takes a bite then passes the next one to me. At some point, I shake my head and continues by himself.
After we finish eating, I get off his lap and push my hair back. "I'm so sleepy. I don't know why."
"You should have some coffee."
"You know I don't like coffee." I pout.
"I know but it'll help."
"Or we can just go back to bed."
He raises an eyebrow with a smile. "We?"
"Yes."
"As lovely as that idea sound, no, thank you. I have a meeting and I've already slept much more than usual."
"Yeah, you did and....no nightmares."
The look in his eyes darken and he just nods.
"Do you have them a lot?"
"Yes."
"What do you see?"
He strokes gently strokes my cheek, taking his sweet time before saying, "Nothing you need to worry yourself about."
And then he walks away. That's it?
He just left me standing there. This is going to be challenging. Cracking Adam open. I just want to get to know him.
****
I just woke up from a two hour nap. I've been thinking about Jasmine so I've decided that I'm going to go see her at the Summit.
Adam is still in his home office so I go there and knock.
"Adam."
"Hm?"
"I'm going out."
"Okay." He says. I wait for him to say something but he doesn't, instead he just asks, "Do you need anything?"
"No."
****
I arrive at the summit and Chloe opens the door for me.
"Hi." We hug and air kiss. "How is she?"
Chloe shakes her head. "It's bad."
I enter the bedroom and see Jasmine cuddled up in a Louis Vuitton blanket. There's like twenty pieces of used tissue around her.
"Jasmine." I whisper.
"Hey." She smiles then opens her arms. I hug her and kiss her head. "How are you feeling?"
"Better now. Thank you so much for this."
"Of course."
"So what happened?"
"You won't understand, Amelia. Our lives are just........different."
"That doesn't mean I won't understand you."
"Try me."
"For the past few months, I've just felt empty and lost." She starts. "Despite having amazing friends like you guys and my family, I just felt so fucking lonely so I started going to The Snipe."
"And that's where she met Finn."
Finn? That name sounds familiar.
"He's the top racer there. We started hooking up and then I literally did everything he wanted me to, gave him everything."
"But that's so unlike you, Jasmine."
"I know!" She cries and ducks her head to sniffle. "But I was scared that if I didn't he would leave me. I just needed love Amelia, I needed someone."
"I get it."
"You do?"
"Of course. That's how I felt when Liam was gone. Even though I had you guys, I felt lonely and misunderstood."
"Right! Finn was there, Amelia and he was different from everything I'm used to. I just didn't think he would destroy me like this."
"What really happened that night?"
"I caught him cheating on me after I realized that he bet everything that's in my account on himself."
"What?"
"Here's where it gets crazy. He won but the money mysteriously disappeared."
"So he stole from you and then cheated on you on the same night."
"Yes and the thing is, I wasn't even heart broken or anything like that. I was just angry so I went to confront him snd the girl that he cheated with started defending him so we got physical and the cops came."
"Wow."
"Yeah."
"So what are you going to about this?"
"I don't know. Nothing, I guess."
"Jas! You can't let him get away with it."
****
"What are you doing?"
I jump back in fear and quickly hide the keys behind in fear. So yeah, I'm in my parents' house about to steal my dad's Mercedes.
Adam has trackers on all of our cars and if I want my plan to work, I can't let him know it.
"Austin?! Hey!" I smile at my younger brother.
"Are you stealing dad's car?"
Yes, I'm still my father's favorite car which is also my favorite.
"Nooo. What are you talking about?" I start stroking the ends of my hair.
"Amelia, I'm not an idiot."
"Look, why are you even here? Aren't you supposed to be doing community service or something?"
Austin, my cousin Hayden and some of their friends were caught doing drugs so my dad had them arrested but they got a plea since is there first offense.
"We're doing that but we're also on lockdown."
"Where's Hayden?"
"He's upstairs, sleeping."
"How have you guys been? Have your lesson yet?"
"You know dad asked Adam to talk us and yeah, it helped."
"Why would he ask Adam? He's not a freaking life-coach."
"Yeah but as you know, he's been through the same thing. He even went to rehab and stuff."
I stand there in shock because I don't know how what my brother is talking about.
I don't because Adam never tells me anything and freaking upsets me.
"I have to go." I tell Austin.
"I'm going to call dad."
"What? You can't do that."
"Fine but in return, you owe me."
I roll my eyes. "Okay."
"I'm serious."
"Okay. Bye."
****
Amelia's dad car
"Amelia, I have a bad feeling about this."
"Emily, we're helping out our friend." I remind her.
"I know but if feels like...high school." She whispers.
"And that's a bad thing?" Camilla asks suspiciously.
"No!" Nicole and I say while Emily answers."Yes!"
"Val just texted. The tow truck is here."
"Alright, let's go."
"We should have involved the guys in this."
"Are you saying we can't handle this on our own cause we're women? What's wrong with you?"
"That's not what I'm saying! The guys have been here several time they know how things are."
"Cam has been here a lot of times too."
I see Adam calling me. I roll my eyes then answer. "Amelia."
"Yes."
"Where are you? Your car is at your parents' but I'm told you're not there."
"Yes."
"I'm worried about you. Are you going to tell me where you are?"
"I'm at the Snipe."
The line goes silent for a good minute then he finally speaks, "Why?"
"I have something to take care of."
"Amelia, that place is dangerous."
"You would know that, wouldn't you?"
"Excuse me?"
"Look, you didn't seem to care this morning so right now, you shouldn't either." I tell him then I hang up.
Adamð: I was in a meeting when you left.
Me: I know. Good for you.
Adamð: Yes, it was. If you have a problem, say it. I'm not in the mood to play games.
Me: You're never in the mood for anything.
He calls again but I don't answer. I put my phone back in my handbag and walk back to the girls.
When I got tired of Adam's calls, I send him a text.
"You okay?" Nicole asks.
"Yeah, I'm fine. Let's go."
"So since Finn is like the best racer here, he races last. The competition has six levels. It's starts with two amateurs and the winner goes to the next round and race someone else. It keeps going like this till they reach the final level."
"And that's with Finn, right?"
"Yes but Amelia, these things happen every weekend and Finn has never lost."
"Well, that's why we're here. There's a first time for everything." I smile.
****
"Cooper just texted. They've got the car."
"Really? How?"
"He's really good at like sneaking in and stuff."
"Oh-oh look who's here." Val says.
I turn my eyes from the race and I see Liam, Colton and Jacob coming up to us.
"Emily, did you text them?" Nicole asks.
"Yes."
"Gosh! You're such a scaredy-cat."
"No, I'm not. Shut up, Camilla!"
"You are! You can't even tell your boyfriend that you're pregnant. News flash! You're going to start showing soon."
In a blink of an eye, Emily pours the smoothie she's drinking all over Cam's face and we all gasp.
"You hormonal bitch!" Camilla lunges to attack but Val and I hold her back.
"She's pregnant." I remind her and I guess that explains why she's being so cranky.
And yes, this night is starting to feel a lot like high school.
Emily walks off to Colton while Valerie goes with Cam to help her wash off.
"Hey." Liam comes up to me with a smile. Hw looks good.
"Liam, hi!"
"Good to see you." He hugs me and I hug him back.
"You too. I can't believe Emily asked you guys
to come here."
"She didn't. She just told Colton where you were and we figured you might need help."
I roll my eyes. "We're not damsels in distress."
"I know but this place is dangerous." He says on a serious note and it's so weird.
"You sound like him."
"Who?"
"Who do you think?"
"Adam? He doesn't approve of you coming here, does he?"
I nod.
"Trouble in paradise?"
"I can't do it. I can't be with him, Liam."
Liam looks like I told him his pet died. "What? Are you serious?"
"Yes. Adam and I are just too different. I'm an open book while he's the most mysterious person I've ever met. He won't even give me a chance to get to know him. How could I ever be with someone like that?"
"How can you not? He would do anything for you. He literally shattered his walls for you, Amelia."
"You don't know what you're talking about."
"Yes, I do! More than anyone. He called me and asked me to come back. I asked him why and he said, "I think she will happier with you." For how long do you think Adam has had feelings for you? Do you think it was easy for him to make that call? All he wants to do is to make you happy, try for you." He says.
"You should ask yourself if you've given him a chance to do that." He then adds.
"I just don't want to go in, only for it to end and then I would have to suffer all over again. You have no idea what I went through after you left Liam."
"Amelia, do you think it was easy for me? I literally had a jet waiting for me at the airport. I didn't have the chance to say goodbye. Our dads were standing by me as I wrote that fucking letter. I was dead when I was in Spain. I couldn't get off my bed, couldn't eat. All I could think of was that you were here married to my brother. I saw the woman I loved marry my brother. What do you think that did to me?"
Oh shit. I don't think I ever sat down and thought how Liam felt when he saw me get married to his brother.
"I'm sorry, Liam. I cried everyday."
"And you think I didn't? I had never cried so much in my life. Losing you was the worst thing that has ever happened to me. No one has ever made me happy the way that you did."
Romance aside, I don't think there has been a time in my life that I was happy compared to when Liam and I were dating. We had this bond, like we were soulmates. He completed me and any bad thing that happened, I was confident I would get over it because I knew I had him. He was my safety net.
"Liam..
"I love you, Amelia. I always will. I would never have left if in anyway I thought you were going into the wrong hands. I trust Adam and I trust that he's crazy about you. He's just never been shown or experienced loved so he doesn't know how to go about it."
"But what if doesn't work out? Look how I spend my evenings while he's there making billion dollar decisions."
"It doesn't matter how different you are, Amelia. What matters is how you feel for each other and yes it's going to hurt but that's only a proof that the person was worth loving, just like you and I. At least that's what my therapist told me."
"You have a therapist?"
"I did, yeah, until Ian decided it'd good to sleep with her."
"Classic." I smile.
We start hearing voices and loud shouting.
"What's that noise?"
"Hey, what's going on?" Liam asks one of the bouncers.
"They're saying that Finn's car is missing."
I spend two seconds trying to decide if I should pretend to be shocked worried or just keep my expression blank.
"Finn's the top racer, right?"
"Yeah."
"What happens if he doesn't have his car?"
"The sixth round is cancelled and the winner of the fifth round takes the championship."
"Oh shit."
"Yeah, that would fuck Finn up."
Exactly what I want. I excuse myself and then head on to the next part of the plan, FF. Which stands for Finding Finn.
I find him in a dark secluded area. He looks upset, smoking what smells like weed.
"Are you okay?" I ask him in a sultry voice.
"Do I look like I'm okay?"
"Oh, sorry. I'll just go."
"No! Come back. You're hot. What's your name?"
Ew, ew, ew.
"Does it matter?"
"You tell me. What's a girl like you doing here?"
"I wanted a fun night."
"I'll give you a fun night."
"Not sure you're bad enough."
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah. Are those drugs?"" I raise an eyebrow.
"Yeah, heroin, molly and benzos."
"You take this everyday?"
"Fuck, yeah."
"I can help you, you know."
"What are you talking about?"
"I can help you get back your championship." I smile.
"Look, all these questions and playing around, is it some kind of role play you're into? Cause you're driving me mad right now."
"No, I can actually get you back your championship."
"How?"
"Cause I was the one that took in the first place." I say waving my phone so he sees the photo of his car.
He lunges towards me to I don't know, attack? But Cooper is right in front of me holding him back. "Back off."
Cam's bodyguard comes from behind and puts handcuffs on him.
"Oh, hey, Finn." She smiles as she joins us. Finn glares at her then look back at me.
"You fucking bitch! I'm gonna ruin you!"
"Good luck doing that from jail." I smirk.
"Look, you're going to call Jasmine, apologize to her and then give back all the money you took."
"And why the fuck would I do that?"
"I have you admitting to multiple crimes on tape."
He stares at me in disbelief.
"The police are on their way so tick tock."
"You don't know who you're messing with."
"Just apologize and bring back the money, Finn." Camilla tells him.
"Fine!"
Thirty minutes later, we have what we want. Finn has his car back and we didn't call the police. Finn still lost his championship though. Giving it back to him was actually never part of our plan.
Everything was fine till I got a call from home.
And I kind of have a feeling it has to do with the text I sent Adam earlier.
Me: I can't do this anymore.
I made a mistake obviously but Adam doesn't know that.
****
"What's going on, Wesley?"
I can feel the tension all over the house though I have known idea what the hell is going on.
I see Damien pacing around looking worried as hell.
"Damien! What's wrong?"
"What did you say to him?" He asks simply. He's looking at me with disappointment.
"What?"
What's he talking about? I'm about to ask him but I don't because frankly, I rather see for myself. I don't even have any idea on what's happening right now.
"Where's Adam?" I ask Wesley.
"He's upstairs with Dr Sloan."
Dr Sloan as in my therapist? I'm so confused. I press the elevator button and then head upstairs. I don't know why they're not saying anything.
I hear voices from Adam's room and I rush there. Chase is standing and talking to an unfamiliar guy.
"Chase."
"Is Adam in his room?"
"Yes." He replies, being stand-off-ish as usual.
"Is he in there with Dr Sloan? What's going on?"Â I ask and who the hell is this man.
He's middle-aged, wearing formal clothes and he has glasses on. Is he Adam's friend?
"I am Dr Sloan. It's a pleasure to finally meet you, Mrs Black." He says.
Huh?
"I believe when you heard the name "Sloan" you mistook me for my wife, Bridget."
Oh.
"Yes, I did. What's going on, Doctor? Why are you here? And where's my husband?"
"I'm your husband's psychiatrist." He explains.
So Adam has a psychiatrist? I'm surely learning things about him today and none coming from him!
"Mrs Amelia." Marina joins us.
"Yes, Marina."
"I've brought food to the living room for you."
"Thanks, Marina but I'm not hungry."
"But you look tired. You should at least sit and have a cup of water."
She's not going to give up so I sigh and follow her to the living room.
"What's going on?"
"Mr Black. He's breaking things." She says like it's nothing bu the usual.
"How often does these things happen?"
"I've seen a few and every time it happens, the doctor comes."
"Mr Handel said no one should tell you but I called Cooper because in my country, wife takes care of husband. She must know."
"Yes. Thank you very much, Marina."
After Marina left, Dr Sloan comes and sit with me in the living room.
"Look, I don't care what Chase has told you. I'm Adam's wife. I deserve to know what's going on." I tell him in my best no nonsense manner.
He smiles. "I agree. That's why I'm here."
"I'm not sure if he's told you this but Adam has been diagnosed with clinical depression since he was about seven years old." He says.
Oh my God.
"Um, he's never told me that."
"I thought so. You asked what is going on. Adam's condition is associated with RSD which stands for Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria. When triggered, Adam has outbreaks."
"And by triggered you mean.."
"You breaking up with him on the first day of your relationship, yes."
My heart drops. Holy shit. This is my fault.
"I didn't mean to. I was just mad at him."
"I understand."
"Can I talk to him? And explain that it was a mistake."
"You can try but I would suggest that-"
I'm out of the living room before he finishes the sentence. When I reach Adam's bedroom door, Chase is no longer standing there. I wonder if he's inside.
I twist the door knob and go inside and it's dark. The blinds are open so I there's light from outside coming in. Not much though since it's like one am.
There's a figure sitting on the bed. His back is facing me. I open my mouth to speak but I can't. I wonder what's he's going through, what he's feeling.
Did he like me that much for him to get affected like this?"
"Get out." He says.
His voice is cold and husky and I swear I can hear the pain it. He hasn't even turned around. How does he know it's me?
"Adam, I-"
"GET OUT."
Well, now I'm fucked.
****
Hello everyone. I hope you're all doing well. I know it's been a while and I'm so sorry. Honestly, I don't think I'm good of a writer as I used to be.
I started this book when I was 15 (I'm 19 now, by the way) and at that time, I had it all figured. I knew what I wanted to happen and how I wanted it to end but as I grew older, I started disliking my original ideas and tried my best to improve them.
Writing is so hard. Sometimes I finish a chapter and after I read it, I realize how bad it is so I delete it and start rewriting. For this chapter, I know how I wanted it to be but I couldn't find the right way to write it down.
I really want to give you guys the best content so all I ask for is patienceð¥º.
I created an Instagram account where we can interact and maybe I can share sneak peeks with you. One of you suggested this idea a long time ago so I decided to with it.
The username is 'goldencorde' if you would like to follow. You guys can give me more inspiration and we could figure out how to make this book and updates work.
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This chapter was honestly so hard to write because of the transition of Adam and Amelia's relationship.
What did you think of the first part?
Any thoughts on what Jasmine is going through?
Do you think Amelia and Liam can form an honest friendship?
How do you feel about Amelia's mistake?
Will Adam forgive her?
Please vote, comment and share.
All the love. â¤ï¸â¤ï¸â¤ï¸