Last chapter so sad :(
Anyway enjoy xx
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I smoothed down the dress as I stared back at my appearance. I decided to go with a mid-thigh baby blue dress that hugged my figure and had a small cut at the stomach. My hair was down in waves and I wore silver hoops. I slid on my silver heels feeling happy with my outfit.
I've actually gotten quite comfy with wearing heels now and actually look normal whenever I walk.
I know I have other things to worry about. My now dead mother and Josh. But tonight I didn't have to deal with it. I can drink and forget everything just for tonight. I needed this.
I opened the door and entered the party where loud music rang in my ears.
As soon as I got downstairs it looked like a normal teenage party. Loud music pounding through the walls and people dancing everywhere. This tradition must mean a lot to them, a celebration to congratulate them on one less enemy. I didn't like that they were celebrating how they just killed people yet I couldn't be bothered thinking about it. Just one night of no thinking. No thoughts.
"Hey. You look nice" Richard smiled.
He wore casual black jeans and a white top. Well he cleaned up nicely.
I smiled. "You don't look so bad yourself"
"Let's get a drink" he spoke and grabbed my arm, leading me through the wave of people.
He handing me an alcoholic drink.
My eyes flickered to the drink and I grabbed it. "You only live once right?" I gulped the drink in one swift motion, drowning the contents.
"True that" Richard grinned and did the same.
Before I knew it Richard was grabbing more drinks and we were taking shots. I ended up losing count of just how much we were drinking.
I am definitely a lightweight so it didn't take me long to feel slightly light headed.
Richard yelled in excitement which made me giggle. Since when did I giggle?
I got more drinks and gulped it down. Feeling extremely drunk.
"Let's dance" I yelled to him.
We weaved into the middle of the crowd dancing around. People always told my I was a decent dancer, thanks to my hip hop lessons I took when I was younger. It has been quite a while yet being influenced by alcohol and the music I instantly fell into rhythm.
I didn't care who I was dancing with but at one point I turned to meet Xavier.
Now he cleaned up well. He has a habit of always taking my breath away. He was wearing denim jeans and a grey top that outlined his muscular figure. Something so casual yet he always seemed to pull it off.
"Xavier" I yelled hugging him as I got a strong whiff of his cologne. There's something about a guy's cologne that I love.
He rolled his eyes. "And your really drunk" he muttured.
"I'm not drunk" I spoke trying to act angry before giggling.
He rolled his eyes and left, either hating my company or trying to find some drinks. "Party pooper" I mumbled at his retreating figure.
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It's been a few hours or days, it's rather hard to tell right now because I seemed to have lost my mind. I had no idea where I was going as I walked up the stairs and entered a hallway with multiple rooms. I bumped into a pot plant making me stumble. I death glared at it. "Stupid pot plant"
I had no idea what I was saying.
I kept stumbling down the hallway.
Where was Xavier? Heck why am I even looking for him?
Even though I didn't want to admit it, I knew exactly why I was looking for him. Because being influenced by alcohol means you just want to spill everything, including the truth.
The truth is I like Xavier. A lot. I keep denying it yet I know deep down that it's true.
For some reason I thought calling his name out would be a good idea.
"Xavier" I yelled. "Where are you? Come out, come out, where ever you are"
A door opened next to me and pulled me in before slamming the door.
"Found you" I giggled.
His arms were still around my waist and his eyes connected with mine. I then realised how close we were, close enough that I was able to smell his minty breath. His hair was tousled which gave me the urge to run my hands through it. I had to fight every urge inside of me not to do it. To not give into my urges. Thank god I still have some self control.
I suddenly started dancing, twirling around in circles.
He frowned. "What are you doing?"
"I'm a fairy" I squealed in excitement.
He raised his brow in amusement.
I grabbed his arms and started twirling around. "Dance with me"
All of a sudden I let go and fall right on my butt. I pouted "Stupid moving floor" I muttured.
"The floor doesn't move Avery" he spoke, amusement glistening in his eyes.
"Yes it does it just did!" I tried to reason myself. "Wait, who's Avery?"
He rolled his eyes at me not bothering to answer. I suddenly got it. "Oh I know, your Avery!" I smiled widely.
He explained it slowly and loudly. "I'm Xavier and your Avery" before running his hand through his hair in a tired manner "Doesn't matter, your drunk"
He sat down on the edge of the bed and stared at the floor deep in thought. I frowned. "What'swrong Charlie?" I looked at the ground deep in thought, "Or was it Frank? Imean Xavier"
He glanced at me. "Your drunk and your not gonna remember this tomorrow, why waste my breath?"
I pouted. "Oh c'mon. I'm your fairy godmother, I'll fix it"
This didn't seem to lighten the mood. "I'm a monster" he muttered.
I frowned. "Nope, I'm 99.9% sure that your human". I suddenly realised how stupid my answer was.
He ignored me and went on. "I've killed so many people, some full of bad sins and others innocent. I never wanted to be like my father yet I turned out to be exactly like him"
I know he's done bad things but I never thought of him as a monster.
I felt less drunk and more sober as I started to think more clearly. "Your not a monster" I muttered.
I wanted him to look me in the eyes yet he refused to look. He didn't want me to see him. He was afraid I'd see what he truly feared.
"Yes I am" He replied back.
My hand cupped his cheek making him face me and stare into my eyes. His eyes were filled with pain and regret.
"What your feeling right now is pain and sadness, emotions Xavier. I believe anybody capable of feeling human emotion is capable of being saved" I murmured staring straight into his eyes.
He didn't draw his eyes away from mine. "I'm not good for you Avery, as much as I want to be"
I shook my head. "I'm not Miss Perfect Xavier, I've done some bad things too. Everyone does"
He laughed. "Like what? Killed someone?"
I couldn't answer that.
He looked conflicted. "You deserve someone good for your Avery. Someone that's not me. I kill people." he laughed humoressly "And I kidnap innocent people"
"It's not your fault. My now dead father sold me so it's his fault and you never harmed me or used me in the way other men would" I replied.
This made him slightly angry. "Stop trying to justify my actions!"
He looked so conflicted. Like he was having a war with himself and there was nothing I could do about it.
"I'm not justifying your actions" I stated truthly. "You really want to know what I think of you?" I asked him.
He didn't reply yet the look in his eyes told me to continue.
"I think you are a bad person Xavier" I started in a somewhat angry tone. "You've done terrible things. Killed people. Manipulated people and I do blame you for almost everything that has happened to me"
He hid the flash of pain with a cold stare. "You think I like doing this? Being this person?" he asked with a painful expression.
"This is all I have" With a broken expression. "So I do what I have to do. And the only way to do that is to block out every emotion. You don't feel, you don't care. It's easier that way"
I stared at the man in front of me. He's human and if anything this shows exactly that.
"Feeling is part of being human. You have to let it all in. At first it hurts, you feel pain and sadness, but then it gets better where you can feel at peace and happy" I explained to him in a soothing way.
Although I was talking to Xavier I also felt like I was also talking to myself, giving myself the advice because I had also done what Xavier was doing. Pushing everyone and everything away.
"I can't do it" He covered his forehead with his hands.
He was in excruciating pain and I couldn't bear to see him like that. While I would say that it's because I don't like seeing people in pain and I like helping people but I know there's more to it than that. I know I have a soft spot for Xavier, I hate to admit it to myself but I'd be lying if I said I don't.
I grabbed his hands and gently pulled it away from his face. "You've lost everyone. You've been hurt more than you let on and betrayed every time you open up your heart. Your scared of letting anyone in because your scared your going to lose them" I gave a small laugh "Trust me I understand more than anyone"
He knew exactly what I was talking about. I could see his facade slipping. He was dropping his guard and that was progress.
I wrapped my arms around him. His body tensed before relaxing. It wasn't long before he wrapped his arms around me, embracing me in a hug. We just stayed there. None of us wanting to ruin the moment.
"I'm not going anywhere" I reassured him, my voice just above a whisper.
His breath fanned my bare neck as I leaned back to see his ocean blue eyes staring straight back at me. We were so close, only inches apart. Seeing him in a vulnerable state made me realise the cold front was just an exterior and he was just scared of letting anyone in.
His eyes flickered between my eyes and my lips as he leaned in closer.
I knew this was wrong. Heck it felt wrong yet when I was around him I couldn't help myself. Every bone in my body tried pulling me back yet somehow I couldn't resist, whatever I felt for Xavier was taking over.
Our lips connected as I slid my hands into his hair tugging lightly. His arm circled around my waist as he pulled me impossibly closer. The kiss was electric like nothing I had ever felt before. It was passionate yet urgent, as if either one of us would slip away in a matter of seconds. His lips are soft and luscious as his tongue moves in rhythm with mine. My whole body felt ignited as I leant in for more.
He pulls away slightly as we both catch our breath.
"God what are you doing to me Avery?" he breathes out in a husky voice.
I had no idea what I was doing.
Maybe, I was beginning to develop feelings for Xavier.
Oh shit.
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Long chapter for y'all, so your welcome.
First of all don't ask for more chapters because I didn't finish on a cliffhanger (death glares at the people that are commenting write more).
When I first started writing this book I had the plot of a girl who was bullied to come back embracing herself and standing up for herself . I hope that this can empower people in similar circumstances because I know heaps of people get bullied. This impacts on people so much, I should know, it can damage someone's life. My word of advice and what I hope stands out from this book is don't give them the satisfaction of hurting you. Instead bounce back better then ever and show them that they were wrong to mess with you. Of course if anyone needs someone to talk to message me, I'm a great listener and I am more than happy to talk to you about it. I'm here for my homies :))
I also want to take this opportunity to thank you all. I feel like writing this book was such a journey. I've learnt so much from this book and have developed so much as a writer and I'd like to thank all of my readers for it. Without you I don't believe I would've gotten this far in writing this book and wouldn't have gotten so much experience. So I am going to end this note now before I possibly become too emotional and won't be able to stop writing ;)) This brings an end to I'm back bitches. Thank you everyone for this amazing experience
Remember to comment and vote.
~ Ashley