CH 69

ch 69 “moreover, my brother is unwilling to kill me.”

seven days later.

hearing indistinct voices outside the carriage, xie chaoling’s eyelashes fluttered. the voices were intermittent, as if someone was interrogating and questioning, and the back door of the carriage seemed to have opened, letting in some light. then he heard xie chaoyuan’s voice, which was much clearer than if he were separated by a door. his voice was calm and steady as he said, “my brother is in the carriage, and he has caught a cold.”

“if he’s sick, why is he still traveling and doing business?” the person outside the carriage asked.

“we’re making our last trip before the new year. i’m not comfortable leaving him alone, and i can take care of him on the road,” xie chaoyuan explained.

xie chaoling’s heart skipped a beat. he wanted to say something, but he couldn’t make a sound. before long, xie chaoyuan got into the carriage and closed the door, and his familiar scent enveloped xie chaoling as he was pulled into an embrace.

xie chaoling still kept his eyes closed as the carriage started moving again, and the sound of the wheels rolling over the sand and gravel outside gradually became clearer.

an uneasy feeling grew inside xie chaoling. he turned his neck with difficulty and finally let out a light cough. xie chaoyuan, who had been resting with his eyes closed, slowly opened them and leaned closer to him.

their eyes met, and xie chaoling was still in a daze. xie chaoyuan reached out and touched his forehead, whispering, “you’re awake.”

it took xie chaoling a moment to come back to his senses. the face in front of him looked particularly unfamiliar, no wonder he didn’t recognize him earlier. xie chaoyuan had changed his appearance.

xie chaoyuan seemed to be amused by his somewhat bewildered reaction, and his lips curved slightly as he said, “brother, do you remember what happened before?”

“you…”

xie chaoling only managed to say this one word, his voice hoarse, almost unable to speak, his throat was even more painful.

xie chaoyuan poured a glass of water and fed it to him. “don’t talk for now. you’ve been asleep for so long and just woke up. you’re probably still weak all over, and your throat hurts. rest for a while. it’ll get better in a day or two. don’t worry.”

xie chaoling stared at him, but xie chaoyuan persisted in feeding him water. after putting down the glass, he lightly brushed his fingers against xie chaoling’s cheek and explained, “you’ve been asleep for seven days. after we left the capital, we took a water route and then switched to a land route. we came here under the guise of a northwest caravan. the stop we made just now was the final border inspection. once we leave the checkpoint, we will have entered xirong.”

it wasn’t easy to evade the officials and soldiers of daliang along the way, but fortunately, they had no major incidents. they had successfully left daliang and entered the territory of xirong.

xie chaoling was taken aback and struggled violently, coughing incessantly.

“don’t get angry, big brother,” xie chaoyuan hugged him and patted his back gently. “you’re still uncomfortable now, try to speak less.”

“i can only do this. if i don’t take you away, your future princess will be entering the palace in two months. would you have me kill her? you don’t want that. you hate me for killing the innocent, and if i kill one, there will be another. instead of that, why don’t i take you away? from now on, we will never be separated again. isn’t that good?”

xie chaoyuan’s voice was very low, speaking close to xie chaoling’s ear. every word he said made xie chaoling feel colder and colder.

finally, xie chaoyuan’s lips pressed against his cheek and slowly caressed it.

xie chaoling struggled but couldn’t break free. the little strength he had accumulated in his body was drained again. he let his arms fall and closed his eyes. he didn’t even have the energy to be angry with him anymore, let alone respond.

for the next two days, they continued to travel non-stop. they would only stop to rest in secluded places after dark.

by the second night, xie chaoling was able to sit up and move around freely, but he still ignored xie chaoyuan, not responding no matter what he said.

in order to avoid drawing attention, only two eunuchs, wang rang and wang jin, were brought by xie chaoyuan, along with more than twenty loyal guards who disguised themselves as a small-scale caravan. with so many people watching, xie chaoling couldn’t escape and he had no intention of doing so either.

this is xirong, not daliang, and it’s not a place where he can ride a horse back home.

when the sky was completely dark, the caravan turned into the mountains and stopped at a place near the stream to make a fire and cook.

xie chaoling leaned against the carriage and daydreamed. xie chaoyuan knew he didn’t want to talk to him, so he didn’t bother him and got off the carriage.

two quarters of an hour later, wang jin came up to the carriage and poured water for xie chaoling: “this slave just boiled some hot water with the stream water. it’s quite sweet. you haven’t had a drink all day. just moisten your mouth. dinner will be ready soon.”

seeing that xie chaoling still ignored him, wang jin had to lower his voice and persuade him: “just drink some water. don’t be too hard on yourself. if you don’t eat or drink like this, even if you want to go back to daliang, you won’t have the strength.”

xie chaoling finally opened his eyes and looked at him: “why did he bring you out?”

wang jin lowered his head: “this slave doesn’t know either. this slave thinks that he is afraid that you won’t adapt. only this slave has served you and knows your habits, so he brought this slave along.”

xie chaoling didn’t ask again. after a while, xie chaoyuan got back on the carriage and brought up the prepared meal.

food was limited in the wilderness. xie chaoyuan pushed the soup in front of xie chaoling and said, “drink some. when we get to our destination in a few days, it won’t be so difficult.”

xie chaoling stared at the bowl of soup and didn’t move. xie chaoyuan said again, “if you don’t eat anything, you’ll be hungry and won’t be able to sleep at night.”

xie chaoling sneered and picked up the bowl of soup, finishing it in a few sips.

he was really hungry.

after putting down the empty bowl, he picked up his chopsticks and started eating.

xie chaoyuan looked at him and suddenly laughed. he didn’t say anything and picked up his own chopsticks.

after eating, xie chaoling got off the carriage for the first time in many days. when he got down, he almost fell because his legs were weak. xie chaoyuan reached out and supported him. xie chaoling looked back at him, withdrew his hand, and walked towards the stream.

these past two days, while on the road during the day, he occasionally looked out the window. the journey so far had been mostly through deserted wilderness. although xirong was a large country, the land was mostly barren. otherwise, they wouldn’t repeatedly invade the border of daliang and covet the central plains.

the autumn night was cool and the frost was heavy, with the moon casting a dark shadow. except for the faint sound of the wind, there was complete silence.

xie chaoling stretched out his hand, feeling the cool breeze passing through his fingers, and lightly closed his eyes.

“brother, are you still unwilling to talk to me?” xie chaoyuan asked softly beside him.

after a while, he heard xie chaoling calmly speak, “why did you come to xirong?”

“nowhere else to go,” xie chaoyuan answered truthfully.

he had taken away the crown prince of daliang and had become a wanted criminal of the daliang court. he had no place to stay in daliang or in any of its vassal states like bailing. xirong was his only option.

since the day xie chaoling had found out about his background, he had been prepared for this. perhaps if he had been more obedient and listened to xie chaoling a little more, xie chaoling would have been willing to help him keep his secret for the rest of his life. but he couldn’t do that. he wanted xie chaoling, so this day was destined to come.

xie chaoling sneered, “is xirong really a place where anyone can go? do you have any use or value in the eyes of those xirong people? will your so-called biological father really care about your father-son relationship and take you in?”

the wind blew away a strand of hair from his cheek, and xie chaoyuan raised his hand to tuck it behind his ear, and slowly said, “i have the daliang crown prince in my hands.”

xie chaoling frowned.

xie chaoyuan smiled, “as i told you last time, i found someone who is similar in age, body shape, and looks to you. i will disguise him to look like you and hand him over to them.”

xie chaoling’s expression turned cold, “and then what? let those xirong people use him to threaten daliang? it would be best to push him to the front lines during a battle between the two armies? are you planning to write another letter to let the northwest army know that it’s a fake, so that they can kill without hesitation, and finally i’ll ‘die’ on the battlefield and never be able to return?”

xie chaoyuan’s fingers pinched his earlobe and gently rubbed it, “do you still want to go back, brother?”

of course, he wanted to go back, but xie chaoling was not so stupid as to say it out loud and provoke this little brat into going crazy. he didn’t want to talk about this and changed the subject, “where did you find the person?”

“he was already a death-row prisoner, don’t worry, brother. i won’t kill innocent people. i’ll listen to your words.”

xie chaoling almost laughed out loud, “once you hand over the chip, it’s gone. it won’t be easy for xirong to accept you.”

“it’s not easy,” xie chaoyuan nodded, “but i was once a prince of da liang. even if i fled in a miserable state now, they must think i still have connections and eyes in the da liang court. just based on this, my father will treat me as a guest of honor.”

“deceiving them,” xie chaoling sneered and turned to leave.

the night had fallen, and the guards outside had all fallen asleep except for a few who were on duty. xie chaoling laid in the carriage, covered with a cloak, and a thick woolen mat underneath. although he was not cold, he was not sleepy either.

only now did his mind have the energy to think about things. he didn’t know what was happening in the capital now, and it was impossible to find out. xie chaoyuan would probably take him to the capital of xirong, and he could try to contact the northwest army and find a chance to return.

the carriage door opened and closed, and after a rustling sound, xie chaoyuan laid down behind xie chaoling and handed him something: “take this, brother, to keep you warm at night.”

it was a hand warmer, but xie chaoling didn’t take it. xie chaoyuan directly stuffed it into his arms and said, “hold it.”

his once slightly cold hands quickly became warm. xie chaoling held the hand warmer and didn’t move. xie chaoyuan embraced him lightly from behind and whispered, “it’s a bit colder here than in the capital. you just arrived and might not be used to it. be careful not to get sick. when we arrive in lido, i’ll find a chef from the da liang to make dishes to your liking and build a house in the style of the da liang, planted with flowers you like. you’ll be satisfied for sure.”

xie chaoling remained silent.

“if you don’t want to talk, then sleep,” xie chaoyuan lightly patted his waist.

after a while, xie chaoling suddenly turned around, opened his eyes in the darkness, and before xie chaoyuan could say anything, he felt something pressing against his lower abdomen—it was the short knife, already out of its sheath.

xie chaoyuan’s eyes flickered but he didn’t dodge. he stared at xie chaoling and said, “is brother planning to give me another cut, like last time?”

“do you believe that i’ll kill you?” xie chaoling whispered close to him.

xie chaoyuan shrugged it off. “even if you kill me, you won’t be able to leave. do you still remember the way back to daliang?”

“besides, you won’t be willing to kill me.”

xie chaoyuan said the last sentence.

the knife was easily handed over, and xie chaoyuan threw it aside, pressing xie chaoling’s wrist hard and biting his lips fiercely.

xie chaoling made a soft “hiss” sound. the man forced his tongue into his mouth by brute force, stirring it up wildly, causing his tongue tip to ache and making it difficult to breathe. xie chaoling was very uncomfortable with this one-sided suppression. when xie chaoyuan finally slowed down, changing from biting to slow and deliberate kissing, xie chaoling seized the opportunity to bite his tongue as if taking revenge.

he only let go after tasting the bloody taste in his mouth. xie chaoling turned his face away and took deep breaths, his breathing unsteady, while xie chaoyuan looked at him with lowered eyes, gently wiping away the silver strands at the corner of his mouth with his fingers.

xie chaoling glared at him, extremely angry.

xie chaoyuan lowered his head again and touched his lips to xie chaoling’s already rosy lips, returning the short knife to him, “that was my mistake, brother is willing to give it to you. if you want to kill me, go ahead. perhaps if you kill me, those people outside will be willing to listen to you and send you back.”

he was deliberately provoking him. xie chaoling had been holding back for many days and was indeed provoked into anger. the tip of the knife was pressed against xie chaoyuan’s heart.

but he didn’t move it forward.

they locked eyes in silence, their breathing the only sound in the cramped and dark carriage.

after a while, xie chaoyuan lowered his head and kissed xie chaoling’s hand, and the knife in his hand fell to the ground with a sound.

xie chaoling grabbed xie chaoyuan’s clothes and pulled him towards himself, tumbling awkwardly onto the carriage board. he raised his head and fiercely bit xie chaoyuan’s adam’s apple.

xie chaoyuan allowed him to vent and gently stroked his back.

xie chaoling pushed xie chaoyuan down and switched positions, half of his body pressed down on him, with one hand propped up beside him, looking down at the man beneath him.

breathing heavily, xie chaoling was still panting, and his hair had come undone. with his long locks falling down and sticking to xie chaoyuan’s face. he hooked a strand of it with his finger and played with it.

“do you still want to kill me, brother?”

xie chaoling’s eyes grew darker, as he slowly leaned down and closed his eyes, accepting his fate as he kissed xie chaoyuan’s lips.