Chapter 109

His confession rendered me speechless.

I had roughly guessed what Payne would say.

But hearing his declaration shook me.

He looked straight into my eyes with sincerity.

But time changes many things, and none of them are as changeable as the human heart.

“You know what I wish for?” (Rox)

“Anything. Anything I can do, I will try.”

“It is not difficult. What I want is to no longer be involved with the imperial family. I have no desire to enter the imperial palace.”

The Crown prince and Roxana were once on good terms.

However, as she fell in love with him, their relationship ended in tragedy.

Of course, Payne might keep his word.

But it was impossible to fully trust him.

And now that I had no emotional baggage, there was no need to marry someone I didn’t love.

You can’t bet your life on uncertain things.

Entering the imperial family was as glorious as it was dangerous.

At my words, Payne’s face turned pitiful.

However, as if he had already expected my answer, he did not show signs of disappointment.

After a few minutes of silence, he looked at me with a complicated gaze and opened his mouth.

“Unfortunately, the Emperor will not let it go so easily.”

“What does it mean?”

I frowned.

Payne said with a calm face.

“I think the Princess knows about the Grand Duchess of Croix who died a decade ago.”

You will know too.”

Of course, I knew.

Because Elvin’s mother, the Grand Duchess of Croix, had a close relationship with the deceased Duchess Lillian (Roxana’s mother).

I didn’t know what Payne was going to say, so I waited in silence for his next words.

“Because of that incident, a big wall was created between the Grand Duke of Croix and the imperial family, and the Grand Duke also retired from politics and is currently managing only the territory. Because of that, the power of the Grand Duke’s family has greatly declined and is not the same as before.”

“…”

“Just in time, the Duke of Lillian is strong and has wealth, honor, and even military power. From the point of view of the imperial family, there is no chess piece as good as that of the Duke of Lillian, so there is no way His Majesty will let go.”

“You mean your proposal was to help me?”

Instead of denying it, Payne added with a bitter face.

“If things were a little better, I would have found another way. However, His Majesty is concerned that a rift will widen between the imperial family and the duke’s family due to the princess breaking off the engagement with His Highness the Crown Prince.”

My heart was beating wildly and fast.

At first, I thought it was just for the purpose of completely suppressing the crown prince by using Payne’s marriage with me.

The most incomprehensible thing was that the emperor, who cared about his image, brought up the marriage conversation first, which was sure to cause great confusion.

But now that I heard Payne, I understood.

“Even if the Duke doesn’t have other intentions, the Emperor is always suspicious. In addition, the Duke has enough power to threaten the imperial family. Sooner or later, His Majesty may try to suppress the Duke.”

He looked at me silently and sighed lightly.

“The best way to stop this is for me to take over the marriage.”

Every single word of Payne’s words fell heavily on my ears.

For a moment, it felt like my eyes were going far away.

The duke was obviously a good father.

He did not, like other nobles, use his daughter’s marriage to benefit his family.

However, just because the duke was not like that, how could I be sure that others were not like that too?

The Duke’s authority was high, but it was a double-edged sword.

Didn’t they say that an angular stone is easy to hit?

In addition, the duke’s status was certainly high, but it was not that there were no people higher than him in the world.

Like the emperor, for example.

I was a fool for being relieved that the engagement was over.

I thought I was out of the wind, but it turned out that I was still in the middle of a violent storm, and if I took one more step from where I was standing, I would be swept away and thrown into the unknown.

“I understand what Your Highness said. But you did it unnecessarily. You don’t have to make such sacrifices because of me.”

“It’s not a sacrifice.”

Payne denied my words with a firm voice.

I looked at him with amazement.

Two warm and soft eyes were looking straight at me.

“It was also my wish to have the Princess by my side.”

It was dark all around and the moon was bright.

A gust of wind blew the branches and it rained flowers.

Like that night when I said goodbye to Elvin.

My strongest feeling at this moment was longing.

I was stunned at the thought that came to my mind at this moment.

I closed my eyes for a moment then lifted my head, and Payne was looking at me with a serious expression.

Reading the puzzled look on his face, I asked calmly.

“Why me? It seems that the 2nd Prince can achieve what you want without the support of the Duke.”

“The reason is simple. Because I like you.”

A breeze carrying the scent of flowers made my hair flutter and tickled my face.

I looked at Payne in disbelief.

Unlike before, I could see that his earlobes were slightly red.

It felt like my brain was going blank.

“I know things are out of order.”

Payne’s voice woke me from my thoughts.

Only then did I realize what I had just heard.

The blank mind slowly began to return.

But I still couldn’t think of what to say, so I kept my mouth shut.

“I am not asking for an answer right away. I know it’s unreasonable to expect a good answer in a situation like this. But… I want you to know that I meant what I said.”

A bitterness crossed Payne’s gaze at me.

“People will think it’s strange for us to stay out this late. Your father wouldn’t like it. So let’s go back.”

His lips raised as if nothing had happened.

However, the disappointment in his eyes was not completely hidden.

It seemed like he had a hard time managing his expression.

I nodded with a heavy heart. In the end, I couldn’t say anything to him.

***

Returning to the banquet hall, the emperor and the duke were still having a conversation.

They were discussing something with serious faces.

Other ministers, including the chancellor and Marquis Flynn, were also nearby.

Although the emperor had a gentle expression, there was always an unapproachable aura flowing from him.

He looked my way as if he felt my gaze.

In his sharp gaze, there was a coldness unique to the emperor.

When his eyes met mine, my body stiffened as if a large snake was coiling itself around it.

My heart was beating wildly.

Eventually, the emperor turned his head again as if nothing had happened.

My palms soon became damp, and I almost dropped the fan I was holding.

“My lady, are you okay?”

Seeing my poor complexion, Tien came over and asked.

“I am not feeling well. I’m tired, so tell my father that I’m going back first.”

“Yes. Okay.”

Tien nodded her head with a worried face.

While she went to tell the duke, I took a seat.

If she was concerned, Joan asked cautiously.

“My lady, are you not feeling well? Shall I call the doctor?”

“No. I am just tired.”

I did not know in what spirit I returned home.

When I entered the room and sat down on the bed, Joan was worried but helped me take off the uncomfortable dress and change into my nightgown.

“My lady, are you very tired? You’ve been looking blank since earlier. Did His Highness say something to the lady by any chance?”

She asked in a worried voice.

The maids were far away when Payne and I were talking, so they couldn’t hear what we were talking about.

It was cumbersome to explain and I didn’t want to let others know about this.

And most of all, I was so tired that I just wanted to rest.

“It’s not like that, so don’t worry about it. I can do the rest myself, so everyone leaves.”

I undid my updo hair, took off all the decorations, and tied it back up low and loose.

When I finished washing my face and lay down on the bed, I couldn’t even lift a finger.

Standing for a long time in high shoes and uncomfortable clothes was physically exhausting, but the mental fatigue was even more severe.

Payne had a caring personality and he made me feel comfortable being with him.

But after hearing his confession, I could no longer look at him the way I used to.

All the while I had been with Payne, I never thought he would fall in love with me.

I thought he was trying to get close to me for power. I had no idea that Payne would have such feelings for me.

While interacting with Payne, I prioritized stability and calculated the benefits to the family, not considering his feelings.

Since I was like that, I thought Payne was like that too.

‘Is it causal retribution?’

However, Payne wanted the marriage without asking me, so I didn’t like it.

Even if it was going to happen anyway, it was disrespectful and unpleasant.

I had no intention of sacrificing for my family.

Even if I were criticized for being selfish, it couldn’t be helped.

After all, I was betrothed to the crown prince, and Payne was a brother who shared his blood.

Even if the family affairs of the imperial family were complicated, it was incomprehensible to my common sense for an older brother’s fiancée to become a younger brother’s fiancée.

White moonlight came through the window and illuminated the room.

On one wall hung bunches of dried lisianthus.

The fresh flower had lost its vitality and was dried to be preserved, so it looked like it would crumble at any moment if I touched it.

The colorful red petals also changed color.

It meant that a long time had passed.

‘Half a year…?’

It wasn’t a long time …But now… it felt far too long.

My heart suddenly felt tight, so I stopped thinking and closed my eyes.

***

“Ha…”

Noah sat down at his desk and groaned.

The night was already deep and it would be dawn in a little while, but there were still piles of papers in front of him.

But he was worried about something else.

It was because of the report of a subordinate who had been to the imperial family for his mission.

Feeling a headache, Noah put his hand on his forehead and let out a deep sigh.

“His Highness, the 2nd Prince, has proposed to the princess.”

The relationship between Elvin and the princess obviously seemed unusual.

At least it seemed clear that he had a special regard for the princess.

But while he was away, what on earth happened?

Elvin was not only outstanding in his appearance, but also in his noble status and high in his own abilities, and he was even trusted by the emperor.

Noah often complained about him being cold, but in honesty, it was rare to find such an outstanding boss.

It would be hard to find such talent in the empire.

However, a person matching Elvin’s talent had now appeared.

“Sir, what should I do? Should I report to the master?”