In His Eyes Chap.6

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-Shax <3

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In His Eyes Chapter 6.

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“What the hell is going on?” Chris asked as he pulled me aside. He had brought Micah to the studio and for the past hour or so Micah hadn’t said a word to me. He sat across from me as he played with some clay, but not a single word had been said between us the entire morning.

“What are you talking about?” Maybe if I play dumb, Chris will leave me alone and I can go back to loathing myself for being inappropriate.

“Don’t act dumb with me, asshole. What happened between you and Micah? Usually by now you guys would have talked about the meaning of the universe and why it is that we walk this earth!” He huffed as he finished and I was taken aback.

“Ok, so maybe I’m exaggerating, but still… what the hell happened?”

I remained quiet as I glanced in Micah’s direction. He had the clay in his hands, but he seemed lost in thought. He raised his head a bit as if he felt me staring, so I had to look away.

Chris narrowed his eyes at me when I looked back at him, “What did you do?”

My eyes widen a bit as I tried to play it cool that I had done nothing, “do you really have to assume that I was the one at fault in this?”

Chris rolled his eyes, “Dimitri, baby, you’re fucking twenty-eight years old! Stop answering questions like you’re an innocent teen, for fucks sakes, and tell me what did you do? He has hardly opened his eyes the entire time he has been here. Especially when he’s around you, now are you going to tell me what did you do or say to him?”

I sighed and pinched the bridge of my nose in frustration.

“He won’t open up. He’s put up walls around him ever since I made that stupid comment a week ago. A week ago, Chris, can you fucking believe that?!”

“Ok, now I’m confused. I know Micah doesn’t take compliments that easy, but to be like this an entire week? Well, that must have been one hell of a compliment.”

Chris narrowed his eyes as I remained quiet about the compliment. I mean, it was just a fucking compliment! Anyone would have said ‘thank you’ or simply laugh it off, but Micah had closed himself up and I hadn’t been able to get to him in a week. What difference would it make if I tell Chris?

“I’m waiting, Dimitri.” He said in a stern voice with his arms crossed over his chest.

“I told him he had beautiful eyes… and next thing I know he closed his eyes and walked away form me. That was a week ago since I told him that, and up to this day he won’t open his eyes around me. He hardly talks to me and when he does is forced. When I take him to the library or to the community center, he avoids touching me as much as he can. You know he hates his cane, but in the last week he has used that damn stick more than he has in his life.”

My breath was ragged as I finished my rant. My chest was beating fast in my chest and I could feel the anger and sadness mix together inside of me. I sighed and slid down to the floor. I covered my face with one hand and the other lay on my side.

“I can’t do this anymore, Chris. It’s like he’s disgusted by me or something.”

I could hear Chris’s shaggy hair swish side to side as he shook his head, “He’s not disgusted, D’. Oh, and if you’re thinking what I think you’re thinking, I advice you don’t.”

I moved my hand from my face and stared up at him confused.

“There’s no way out, Dimitri. You agreed to this… you cannot just walk away because he isn’t making lovey-dovey eyes at you.”

I groaned as I closed my eyes and took a deep breath, “I don’t think he wants me around him anymore, Chris. I can’t live with someone that can’t even say a word to me without it feeling forced or meaningless…”

Chris sat next to me and squeezed my shoulder. We were quiet for a few minutes. All I could hear was the slight humming of the wheel. The quiet was broken by Chris.

“All I can tell you right now is that you two need to work this thing out. Explain that it was just a compliment and nothing else. Although, I wonder… why is this affecting you so much?”

He was quiet and I could hear the wheel clicking in his brain.

“That was just a meaningless compliment, right Dimitri?”

I stared ahead not uttering a word.

The small gasp that escaped Chris’s mouth made me want to smother him with a pillow. I swear there were times when I just wished he would be gay … so he could understand what the fuck I’m feeling right now.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

I shook my head, “There’s nothing to talk about since I’m not sure what I feel…”

Again, we were quiet. Chris rested his head on my shoulder as a sign of support I guess, and at that moment I thanked him silently.

“I’ve known him for three weeks, Chris. This can’t be…” I groaned without finishing my sentence.

“It took Emily a week to know that she would be marrying Josh, so why can’t it take you three weeks to fall in love with Micah?”

I raised a brow, “Emily and Josh dated for close to two years before they got married, Chris.”

Chris shrugged, “She believes in love at first sight.”

I looked up the ceiling and sighed. Love at first sight, huh? It sounded like a fairy tale, but it also sounded like a possibility. The day I met Micah, I knew I had it bad even from knowing him an hour. At first it was because he was blind and the way he saw life and the world. Then, as I got to know him, I started to feel comfortable around. Comfortable enough to live with the guy, I’d say. Little by little, Micah started entering my thoughts, my skin, my heart… and now? All I wanted was to stare into his eyes and lose myself in them.

“What are you thinking? Please tell me you’re not thinking about doing the nasty with him… he’s one of my closest friends!” Chris pushed me a little and laughed. Though, I knew that he wasn’t kidding about what he had said.

I chuckled and shook my head, “Trust me, if I was thinking about that, I wouldn’t tell you.” He shoved me again and laughed it off with me.

“What are you really thinking about then?”

I sighed, again. “Bullshit aside?”

“Always,” He gave me a small smile.

“I was thinking that no one had ever made me feel this way before, other than Nick. Ever since Micah walked into my life, I keep seeing a future for us… a future I would protect the way I didn’t protect my and Nick’s future.”

Chris patted me on the back and smiled a bit, “Damn, you romantic bastard. You have to tell him, dude.”

I was about to say how bad that would be when we heard ceramic shatter in the other room. I jumped up and practically ran to where Micah was. He was holding onto the counter so tightly that his knuckles were white. The scared expression on his face made my chest tighten.

“Micah!” Chris came running after me. He pulled Micah to a chair and sat him down.

“You alright, Micah?” He looked around Micah to see if he was hurt and then shook his head in my direction; letting me know that he wasn’t hurt.

“I thought you guys had left or something…. sorry about the mess.”

“Don’t worry about it,” I mumbled as I picked up the bigger pieces and placed them on the counter. While Chris calmed Micah down, I cleaned the broken vase and made sure that there was no clatter on the floor.

“I’ll go bring the car around, “Chris said after a long silence. He left Micah and me alone in the studio, and the tension could be felt a mile away.

Micah got up from the chair and I went to his side to help him, “I can walk by myself, thank you.” He said curtly.

I had enough of the curt words and forced talk.

“You know what? I give up. You want your fucking independency? Then you can have it. I don’t give a damn anymore.” I grabbed my coat from the top of the counter and untied the apron. With one last glance at Micah, I left him where he was.

There’s so much one can take, and I’ve had enough. He wants his self sufficiency so bad? Then he can have it and fucking relish on it. I walked over to my car and ignored Chris yelling my name. Once the key was in the ignition I let go of everything and just focused on how fast I could drive without getting a ticket.

My phone kept ringing and ringing but I ignored it every time. I knew that it was Chris calling me to tell me how much of a bitch I was. I knew that, so I didn’t need him to say shit to me. I didn’t know where I was going, but an hour later I found myself by the beach. I always come here to relax and think. I turned the car off and got out. The sun was low in the sky, so it was making the water look darker as it sat.

Could I really be falling for him? He was a guy who I knew almost nothing about and here I was practically begging him to touch me… ok, that sounded so wrong but that was the idea. I wanted to hold him in my arms and tell them that everything would be alright. But… I can’t do that.

Again, my phone began ringing but this time I didn’t ignore it.

“Hello?”

“Hey, D’, long time no see. I heard you broke up with Nick, how are you?”

I smiled a bit as I heard Jake’s soft voice through the phone. Jake was an old friend. He and I practically grew up together, and when I came out of the closet, I came out to him first. He told me that he was gay too and we both came out to our parents at the same time. Jake was my safety net, he’s the guy I experimented with. He was my first on everything, for lack of better words.

Hearing his voice made me feel secure for some reason, “Hey, J’, I’m alright. Who told you about Nick and me?”

Jake chuckled nervously, “I called Damien yesterday and he told me everything that went down. I wanted to call you but work has me busy.”

I nodded as I answered, “Yea, I finally opened my eyes and realized that Nick wasn’t the one I wanted for me.”

Jake sighed into the phone, but it sounded more like a sigh of relief.

“So, where you right now? I’m in town for the weekend and wondered if you wanted to get together… you know, to catch up and stuff.”

A small smirk covered my lips at the mention of ‘stuff’.

“Where you staying at,” I asked him as I got in the car and started the ignition.

“Ambassador Palace,” Jake said shyly. That was the most expensive hotel on this side of town. He was making it big, and I was happy for him.

“I’m not that far from there,” an idea popped into my head and before I could think about it twice I was already talking, “what you say we go to my place and just hang out?”

Jake agreed happily and we clicked. Thirty minutes later I was parked outside hotel just waiting for him. Jake was a small guy. He’s about five-four in height and around a hundred and something in weight. When I saw him, I smiled. He hadn’t changed his hair color or style. Jake’s hair was pitch black and shaggy around the ears. When Jake saw me, he practically ran over to the car and opened the passenger door with a little too much enthusiasm.

“Hey, D’,” he smiled at me big as he put on his seat belt.

“Ready?” He nodded and I drove off. The whole ride to the house, my arm was around his shoulders. We talked about everything that had happened in the time we hadn’t seen each other. We talked about the old times and I had to park the car twice because I was laughing so hard I was crying.

As we neared the house, I felt a pang of something in my chest. My stomach felt heavy and I was starting to think twice about what I was about to do. Micah hadn’t said that I couldn’t bring friends over, so why should I worry? Jake is just a friend… a friend who knows me better than any lover I’ve ever had.

“Wow, you live here?” Jake said as his eyes widen as he took in the house. He climbed out of the car once we were parked and looked back at me in disbelief.

“Ok, I know you make good money doing pottery and stuff… but this house costs more than what I make in a year!”

I chuckled and walked over to the door, “It’s not mine, Jake. I share it with a guy.”

Jake’s smile faltered, “Oh, new lover?” He tried to play it off by smiling and winking, but I knew it wouldn’t work. I guess he still had feelings for me… and I hated myself for using him this way.

“Nah, just a guy I share the house with.” I opened the door and ushered him in. As I gave him a tour of the house, the front door opened and in came Micah along with Chris.

Chris glared at me when he saw me by the living room. He walked Micah over and helped him sit down on the couch. My jaw tightened when I saw that Micah was holding on to Chris’s arm. He didn’t want to hold onto me, but Chris? I took a deep breath and tried not to think about it.

“Hey, Chris, this is Jake, a childhood friend of mine.”

Chris shook Jake’s hand and when Jake extended his hand to Micah, Micah just smiled, “Sorry, I’m blind so I can’t shake your hand but it’s nice to meet you.”

Jake just nodded and said that it was nice to meet him too. All four of us sat in the living room and talked a little about random things.

“So, how did you two meet?” Chris asked; still glaring at me.

Jake smiled, “We practically grew up together, and when he came out of the closet so did I.” He shrugged like it was not a big deal.

Chris nodded, “It sounds like you two know each other as more than friends.” It wasn’t a question or even a subtle mention. He was stating the facts.

I chuckled as I tried to play it off. I glanced at Micah, who was looking down at his feet as if the conversation was boring. It ticked me off.

I was about to change the topic when Jake opened his mouth and made me regret ever bringing him here.

“Actually, it is thanks to me that Dimitri knows how to pleasure a man.” He laughed and Chris did too, but it sounded more like a sarcastic laugh than anything.

Again, I glanced at Micah and my eyes widen. Micah was staring right at me. At least it felt that way. It had been a week since I saw his deep blue eyes that I wanted to stare into them all night long. But something was wrong… they were black. His eyes were black.

“Chris, will you help me to my room?”

“I can take him,” I said, getting up. It was an excuse to make sure that I had seen right.

“No, Chris can do it.” His words were hard and without emotion. Chris got up from the couch and helped Micah to his room.

Jake and I were left alone in the living room and I wished I was completely alone.

“What was that?” He asked in a scoff.

“I think you should go, I’ll call you a cab.” I said taking out my phone and dialing the number. I didn’t let him talk me out of it, because I needed to be alone.

The black of Micah’s eyes made me feel uneasy.

Twenty minutes later, Jake was in a cab to his hotel and I was so close to punching a fucking hole through the wall. I heard the door to Micah’s room open and close. When I popped my head out from my room, I saw a very angry Chris staring at me.

“You’re one fucking idiot, you know that?”

He didn’t wait for my answer as he walked away. I heard the front door close and sighed. Great, now he hates me too.

I was plopped on my bed, staring at the ceiling, when I heard a knock at my door.

“Yeah?”

Carefully, Micah opened the door and closed it behind him.

I sat up on the bed.

“Hey, Micah, I’m sorry about today… I mean… damn it.” I placed my face in my hands; trying to think of a better way to tell him that I is an idiot who had fallen for him.

I felt his hands caress my hair. They felt unsure but at the same time determined. He caressed down to my neck and up my hands that covered my face.

“Dimitri…?”

I looked up to find myself drowning in his deep blue eyes. He caressed my face and I leaned my cheek against his palm. My breath caught in my throat when Micah leaned down and kissed me softly on the lips. It was the most electrifying kiss I’ve ever had. In that moment I knew… I had fallen for Micah Anderson.

Micah pulled away and he stared into my eyes; it felt that way, at least. He wrapped his arms around my neck and I wrapped mine around his waist. It was a weird position, but having Micah in my arms made everything so much better.

“I’m sorry I reacted the way I did. It’s just… I’ve lived in my own little world for so long that I didn’t know what to do or say. I’ve been self sufficient from the moment of the accident till now….”

“Now…?”

“You came into my life and mixed everything up. I thought I knew what I wanted, but now I find myself not knowing. I tried to shut you out, but I’ve been sitting in my room trying to think of a way to get out of this situation, but I can’t. I couldn't shut you out, no matter how much I tried. I thought you were the same as any other person: you'd come, and then you'd go. But the more I tried to shut you out, the more you tried to get in. Until tonight… when Jake said that it was thanks to him…. I knew what I had to do… I’m sorry if I’m imposing on you, Dimitri.”

I was surprised. This had been the most Micah had ever said to me. My heart was beating fast against my rib cage and the smile on my lips was growing in size. I kissed his shoulder and tightened my arms around him.

“Answer me something; do you want to be alone?”

Micah pulled away and on reflex my arms tightened even more around him, if that’s even possible.

He chuckled and sighed, “If being alone means being without you, then no I don’t want to be alone.” I stared into his very emotional eyes and smiled.

He bent down for another kiss and this time I deepened it by pulling him down on the bed with me. I held him tightly as I traced his lower lip with my tongue. It felt so right to have Micah in my arms that I didn’t want to let go, but unfortunately I had an important breakfast in the morning.

“I would love to continue kissing you and telling you how important you are to me, but I have to get up early in the morning.”

Micah’s smile turned into a slight frown and I sighed. I got up from the bed and sat him on the couch in my room.

“What… what are you doing?”

I pulled the comforter off of my bed and pulled the blankets back. Once the bed was ready to be slept on, I went over to Micah and started taking off his shoes.

“Dimitri…?”

I continued taking of his shoes, followed by his socks, and when I reached his shirt Micah stopped me.

“What are you doing?”

“Getting you ready for bed,” his grasp on my hand loosened and I pulled his shirt off. Seeing Micah shirtless in my room made my pants tightened up front, but I decided to play nice and slow. Rushing things would be a really big turn off.

Once Micah was ready for bed and so was I, I carried him in my arms and placed him on the bed nicely. I could tell that it bothered him that I was treating him like a child or like a cripple, but I explained that I was a hopeless romantic and he just chuckled. I climbed behind Micah and pulled him against my chest. I pulled the blanket over our waists and wrapped my arms around Micah.

Micah sighed contently, “Good night, Dimitri.”

I placed a kiss on the top of his head, “Good night, Micah.”

I would have thought that having Micah in my bed would make sleeping impossible, but his soft snores were like a lullaby to my ears and soon I was fast asleep.