chapter 23

I was standing near the wall and Shiv was infront of me. His face was very close to me. I touched Shiv's forehead and checked if he have a fever or something! When I touched him like that I asked "are you alright!" "what are you doing?" He asked me with surprise as I asked him about his health suddenly."You are behaving strange, that's why I'm checking if you have a fever or is there any difficulties with you" I replied.Obviously there is something wrong with him otherwise how could a person's demeanour would change overnight!His eyes were used to be full of innocence before but now it looks like the eyes of someone who has the confidence to conquer whole world. He can trap anyone and can make anyone bow to him. His presence and aura were like an emperor.Did he get back his memory! Is it his true self! Then if he would get back his memory then why would he stay with us! If he have some difficulties and he can't go back to his house, still no one would like to stay with a single mother with two kids and would pretend as kid's father.That was why I'm sure he didn't get back his memory otherwise from his behaviour I felt he was different from the Shiv we met first.He didn't answer anything about it and went away on that day I also didn't look into it. After that I got busy for the next day feast. I invited all people including all my inn workers and their families. Radhika also came with her whole family. It felt like a festival in my house and my children were very excited for it. They played around and made new friends. Before they had no friends I thought it was because I restricted them to go out unnecessarily. But later I understood it was because they felt inferior to others for not having a father and many times other children also bullied them for not having a father. That was why they didn't put any effort to make friends. But this time they were happy as our whole family were together and it was our first day together as a whole happy family. This might be a fake family where no one have actual relationship but together we  made a perfect combination. Radhika and her husband helped me a lot with arrangements. Shiv didn't get bath for two days because of his injuries, Ayush and Radhika's husband  helped him to take a bath. Then they dressed him up with the new clothes I brought for him. He looked very handsome after wearing those clothes I brought for him. I also forgot that he was not my real husband and complimented him."You look very handsome in these clothes" I said."Then do you mean without these clothes I won't look good!" He said. "Huh!" I never thought about him before in this way. But why he looks eager to know my answer! "I never thought about it before but now I think about it your face proportion are perfect and you are a handsome man with a nice body" I replied. He doesn't seem satisfied with my answer as I said it like I was complimenting an object."I never expected such an honest answer without any expression from my wife on our first day" he said."Come on! I gave you an honest answer and you don't look even satisfied with my answer.If you feel bad then I would said you look ugly next time" I said. "I'm not unhappy with your answer, I'm unhappy that you didn't add any emotion with it. You have to feel before saying such things and when you said it directly like this it sounded fake" he said."I don't know what you actually want but we are a fake couple there won't be any feeling between us in future and I don't have the thing that you calls feeling ..." I said in a cold tone. "Hey there is something on your hair" he said and suddenly get close to me, his lips were very close to my ear and he slowly said in my ear "you looks very beautiful in this red sarre" he said and then stared at my face with a smile. Then suddenly Radhika came in and he went outside with a smile. From his sudden closeness I felt something in my heart and I felt hot air in my surroundings.Radhika was near by and she saw us like that. She started to smile and said "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have came in like that. But let me tell you one thing, you two are giving the vibes of newly weds". "Don't talk nonsense, you know truth of our relationship very well. Nothing is possible between us so don't ever say anything like this again" I said with a rude tone and she became silent."Leave that matter, come here I have something for you" I said and brought a small box out of almirah. "This is for you" I gave that box to her."Why are you the only one always giving me! What is it?" "Check it for yourself" She opened the box and saw a gold bracelet inside it."This is!" She looked at me with shocking eyes."Actually untill now due to my complicated past life I never trusted anyone. It's also same for you...I gave you many things and used you because I needed you at those time. I had selfish motives behind all that but  this time I am giving this to you to apologise for everything and wanted you to accept me not as your boss but as your sister. Can I be your sister!" I asked with tearful and guilty eyes. "I neither thought you are taking advantage of me nor you are my selfish boss. You accepted me when I actually needed help from someone otherwise I would have lost myself a long ago. So, you never did anything bad to me and you don't have to apologise me for those things. From the first day we met, I already took you as my sister" she said. We smiled together and hugged eachother.We hugged eachother for the first time and I realised my heart which was as cold as ice slowly melting and My views on this world is changing. "I hope someday you can also share all those pains you are hiding in your heart" Radhika said. *****We started rituals and everyone participated in it. I thought those rituals were just a formality but we have to pretend as couple there and we did everything as a husband and a wife. I didn't knew those things would happen there otherwise I wouldn't have planned to do that. Doing a ritual together wouldn't not make us a couple. Any ritual, any certificate can't make us a couple. To became an actual couple we have to stay side by side for our whole life but he won't stay with me for longer and I also won't accept him later.Let's just pretend until we can pretend as a happy family.