Chapter 41: To Regain My Honor, To Find Raese

She frowned. “They didn’t seem to see you as any less than each other.” She frowned. Remembering the fond way they’d elbowed each other in the Driter’s Den. “What could you ever do that’d be dishonorable? I cannot fathom it.” She studied his impassive face before continuing. “Sebastian and the red assassin didn’t view you as dishonored.”

“They wouldn’t speak it if they did.”

Is that really true? Mardichi likely would.

Loudly. A lot. To everyone…Like he grumbles about everything else.

“Neither seemed particularly shy in expressing their views when I met them.” She said. Eying him dubiously.

“There are many you haven’t met.”

Like the Captain. He may never forgive me.

Her chin jutted and he sensed his mistake. “Then take me to them and I shall decide if they see you as dishonored.”

“I see myself so!” He roared.

“Then don’t!” She stomped. Inadvertently crushing the bread in her fingers.

He rolled his eyes Heavenward, praying for patience.

“Woman!”

“Wolf!”

He growled in his throat missing the irony in him doing so at just that moment. “I must do this.” He tried to explain more gently.

She kicked one foot out, cocked a hip and crossed her arms over her breasts in such a way that she barely held the bread still in her fist. Disapproval written over her features.

He met her look unflinchingly. “This isn’t something you’ll get your way in.” He warned.

“I never do with you…Yet.” She tapped a toe.

“Ser…”

“Try to leave me.” She commanded impudently. Jaw tightening.

“You can be a wretch on occasion.”

“Frequent occasions.” She tossed her head like a wild mare.

“This is something I have to do for myself.”

They glared at each other a long while, and to his surprise, she finally relented. Arms falling. “You must stay safe and come back to me whole.”

Is she pleading me?

“You must stop trying to command me.” He countered.

“Do what I say and return to me and I shall give it my very best effort.”

He gasped at her impertinence. “You’re no-”

“Do not say ‘Lady’.” She lifted a finger to silence him. “You know what I’ll say…”

You say ‘you like that I’m no lady.’ He mimicked in his head. How many times have I heard her say it? He was beginning to regret ever confiding that to her.

“Where are you going?”

“The Paladines.” He sighed.

“Please come back. Take great care. You take my world with you.” She breathed.

“What are you saying to me?” His face showed shock.

Does she love me?

“I’m saying be cautious. Will you take the dogs?”

Absolutely not. I won’t rest if they’re not with you.

His lips tightened and he shook his head. “They need to be here with you so I won’t worry for you while I’m gone.”

She beamed. “You worry for me?”

He nodded reluctantly. Of course I do.

“How will I know you’re safe?”

“Have you not seen me in battle?” He gave her a lopsided grin. Making sky blue eyes danced behind the white tresses slashing his face in a slight breeze.

“I have.” She admitted. “But you won’t tell me what you’re up against.”

I’m not sure yet.

“Come.” He directed. Waving his hand over his shoulder for her to follow.

“What is it?”

“Have you ever been this far back?”

“No.” She said, puzzled. “I have seen your high fence back there.” She gnawed her lip. “And the dogs have led me to the perimeter several times. But I couldn’t see over and it’s too tall to climb.”

“But you’ve said nothing?” He shot out in surprise.

You’ve not been curious.

“I’ve enough sense to know there are particular things you won’t confide in me…Yet.”

“You say ‘yet’ a lot.”

“Things will not always be as they are.” She warned cryptically.

“You’re unduly confident.” He glanced back at her, quizzically.

Too confident.

I can promise you nothing. I’ve nothing to offer you.

“You will see.” There was a decisiveness to her tone that boded ill for him.

He led her across the main room and out a back door and then through a tiny hallway and a metal door so heavy, he grunted to move it. When he revealed what was behind the cottage, Serdephe shrieked in horror.

“What is that?”

“My kind call it a Sarabi.”