Chapter 31 - Leaving

Shen Shuyun's actual resignation happened more than a month later. Resigning at the beginning of the new school term was not an easy task; the approval process and handover were all very bothersome. When he left, he was already four months pregnant, with his belly starting to show. Fortunately, it was already November, and the weather had turned colder. Shen Shuyun was slender, and wearing a loose sweater, the curve of his belly wasn't very noticeable.

When he left, no one had noticed that he was pregnant. A few colleagues who got along well with him suggested holding a farewell party, but Shen Shuyun, thinking that such an occasion would inevitably involve alcohol, found every possible way to avoid it.

Shen Shuyun wasn't doing too well these days. As soon as October passed, his pregnancy symptoms came on fiercely. Every morning, without the need for an alarm clock, the nauseous feeling rushing up to his chest would wake him from his restless sleep before dawn, followed by the sound of heart-wrenching vomiting from the bathroom.

Shen Shuyun had stopped eating much at night. Besides the lack of appetite, another reason was that no matter what he ate, he would throw it up the next morning. The acidic, sticky substance would surge up from his stomach during the vomiting, burning his throat, leaving a disgusting taste in his mouth, which he really disliked. So, except for occasionally eating an apple, he simply stopped eating at night.

This caused Shen Shuyun to lose weight quickly. Wearing slightly tighter clothes would clearly reveal his bony frame— his spine protruded, and his butterfly bones stuck out on his back, their raised curves resembling wings about to unfold.

Before leaving W City, Shen Shuyun made time to visit the omega hospital, asking Dr. Wen to help him conceal his pregnancy. If Mr. Ning, who had scheduled his appointment, inquired, he was to say that Shen Shuyun had already undergone the marking removal. The doctor looked at Shen Shuyun, hesitant, but eventually agreed.

When Shen Shuyun headed to the airport, it was a dim evening. The temperature in W City had already dropped close to zero in November. He wrapped himself in a thick, soft down jacket and boarded a flight to Z City.

Although the airplane was air-conditioned, the temperature was still somewhat low. Shen Shuyun asked the flight attendant for a blanket, which he placed over his lower abdomen. Leaning against the window, he silently gazed outside. About forty minutes later, the plane finally began to taxi slowly, then suddenly accelerated, speeding down the runway. In the next moment, the plane's nose tilted upward, followed by the loud hum and the light, floating sensation of weightlessness.

Shen Shuyun watched as the ground shrank away, both the flow of traffic and the people below becoming tiny specks of sesame within the small glass window. Even the tall buildings that usually stood so majestically turned into tightly packed blocks.

Finally, a layer of clouds covered everything. The fluffy white clouds floated outside the window, obscuring everything with a blanket of white.

At this moment, Shen Shuyun realized clearly that he had truly left this city, leaving behind everything that was once here.

It wasn't just Ning Wan, but also the school where he had taught. Perhaps he would never return, and thus would never see those people again.

At this moment, Shen Shuyun didn't know whether to feel sad or relieved. He swallowed his sigh, took out his phone, and removed the SIM card.

He felt a bit of self-hatred for his weakness at that moment, but then he thought, he was only human, not made of steel. Why force himself to act indifferent, as if nothing could hurt him?

At his age, it was time to learn to make peace with himself.

After landing, Shen Shuyun took a taxi into the city. The first thing he did was to get a new SIM card at a service center. He didn't throw away the old one, but put it in a small transparent bag and tucked it into a compartment of his wallet. After turning on his phone again and took a taxi to a residential area based on the address in his notes.

Shen Shuyun had a friend in Z City named Xiao Ruan, who was his college classmate. They had shared the same dormitory for four years—of course, Xiao Ruan was also an omega. To prevent omegas from going into heat and causing incidents with alphas, the university had separate dormitory buildings for A's and O's. Before coming, Shen Shuyun had contacted Xiao Ruan, asking him to help find a place to live. Xiao Ruan offered to rent him a room near North Street, charging only fifteen hundred a month.

Shen Shuyun later checked online and found that the location was quite good, and the rental listings in that area didn't go below twenty-five hundred. He understood that Xiao Ruan was helping him out.

When he arrived at the entrance of the residential area, Shen Shuyun called Xiao Ruan. The call was quickly answered: "Hello, who is this?"

"It's Shen Shuyun. I've changed my number." Shen Shuyun couldn't help but smile at the familiar voice. "I'm downstairs at the apartment..."

"What? You're here so early!" Xiao Ruan exclaimed. "Wait for me; I'll come down to get you."

Z City is a southern coastal city, so even in November, it wasn't as frosty as W City. After standing for a while, Shen Shuyun began to feel hot. He took off his down jacket and draped it over his arm, quietly waiting for his old friend.

Soon, a man in a yellow knit sweater came out of the building's entrance. He waved enthusiastically at Shen Shuyun and ran towards him. Instinctively, Shen Shuyun took a step back, half-turning to protect his belly, in case the reckless pounced directly on him..

Xiao Ruan was still the same as before, lively like a hopping rabbit or a chattering bird, not changed a bit even though he was already over thirty. As soon as he saw Shen Shuyun, he wanted to hug him: "Shuyun, it's been such a long time since we last saw each other!"

Indeed, it had been a long time. The last time they met and chatted was three years ago when Xiao Ruan attended his wedding with Ning Wan.

Shen Shuyun put out a hand to steady him: "Don't be reckless."

"What's wrong? We haven't seen each other in three years, and you won't even let me hug you! Just because you have an alpha now, huh?"

"No," Shen Shuyun smiled, but it was a thin smile, like a delicate shell covering his face, "I'm pregnant...and I've divorced Ning Wan."

Xiao Ruan's breath caught, unsure whether to first process the news of Shen Shuyun's pregnancy or to be shocked that he was already divorced. He just stood there, wide-eyed, in a daze.

"Let's go upstairs and talk." Shen Shuyun blinked at him. "You weren't planning to catch up with me for an hour here at the entrance, were you?"

— — — — — — — — — — — — — —

"Ning Zong, Ning Zong?"

Ning Wan snapped back to reality, clasping the two rings on the table in his hand, and looked at Anna: "What is it?"

"The thing you asked me to inquire about yesterday—the status of Mr. Shen's surgery—I've already asked. The doctor said that Mr. Shen underwent the marking removal surgery and everything went well, without any complications."

"Good, I see."

Anna turned and left Ning Wan's office, her black leather heels clicking crisply against the floor.

Ning Wan sighed and rubbed his head, frowning with his eyes closed.

He recalled something Tang Yichuan had said to him a month ago.

At that time, he and Tang Yichuan were drinking, though Tang Yichuan wasn't in high spirits, while Ning Wan had drunk himself into a stupor. When they got to the second bottle of whiskey, Ning Wan's hand was stopped, and Tang Yichuan looked at him deeply: "Don't drink anymore; you're already drunk. There's no need to drink so much, even if you're venting your pain. If you keep drinking, I think you'll end up with a stomach bleed."

Ning Wan's voice was hoarse, a rough sound that came from days spent soaking in alcohol and tobacco, making it rather unpleasant to hear: "I...I divorced my husband."

Strangely, Ning Wan had thought he would tell Tang Yichuan about the divorce as soon as it happened, but he didn't... After handing the divorce papers to Shen Shuyun and leaving the house, he stayed alone for three days before he dared to go back and have a look.

That glance brought a searing pain to his chest. This house, once full of warmth, now felt empty because one of its owners was missing. At first glance, everything seemed the same; nothing much had changed in terms of arrangement. But Ning Wan knew that everything was different.

He went upstairs to the master bedroom, where the sense of emptiness was even more pronounced. Ning Wan noticed something on the bedside table and walked over slowly, picking up the rings, keys, and credit card left there, along with a note and a divorce agreement hidden underneath them.

The note bore Shen Shuyun's handwriting. His script was graceful, flowing yet full of character, making it easy to recognize.

It read: "I've taken all my belongings... If anything is left that you find bothersome, just throw it away."

Ning Wan clenched Shen Shuyun's wedding ring in his hand. The ring, cold from the absence of human warmth, felt particularly icy as he lowered his head and picked up the divorce agreement.

On the second page, the stark black ink caught Ning Wan by surprise—Shen Shuyun had blacked out all the sections regarding the division of property, clearly indicating that he wanted to sever all ties and wanted nothing.

A sharp pain spread through Ning Wan's chest, like a giant hand squeezing his still-beating heart, the pressure so intense it felt as though his heart would be crushed. A sense of regret slowly crept up on him, and he wondered where Shen Shuyun could have gone.

He began trying to numb himself with alcohol, using cigarettes and coffee instead of proper rest and sleep when he needed to stay awake.

Later, Ning Wan asked Tang Yichuan to join him for a drink.

Tang Yichuan was deeply surprised when he heard about the divorce. He stared at Ning Wan, trying to determine if he was joking, but it was clear he wasn't. So, he cautiously asked, "...Is it because of me?"

Ning Wan neither confirmed nor denied it; he just remained silent and then took a large gulp of the burning alcohol.

Tang Yichuan sighed, staring at the colorful bottles behind the bar for a long time before speaking again, his voice low, like cold water: "Ning Wan, you said you were always looking for me. Why? Do you think you love me?"

Ning Wan didn't avoid the question: "Yes... I always thought so."

"Don't confuse gratitude with love." Tang Yichuan propped his head on his hand, shifting his intense gaze from the bottles to Ning Wan. His words were like a sharp blade, easily slicing through the fragile reality, "I saved you when you were around ten years old. Did you really know what love was then, or what it meant to like someone? I suggest you think it through carefully and not do something you'll regret for the rest of your life."

"Persistence can be a good thing, but persistence in the wrong direction is worse than never having it at all."

Ning Wan, now back to his senses, kept repeating Tang Yichuan's words in his mind. He opened his hand and stared at the two silver wedding rings, his mind blank.