Chapter Five

A half hour later, Mia was clean, and her hair fully dry when she stepped out of the bathroom in her pajama shorts and tank top. She saw Adam laying in her bed beneath the covers before she turned the hallway light off and allowed the bedroom to go dark.

Even through the curtains, the light of the city shown in enough for Mia to see Adam lift the blanket as she approached. She slid next to him and rest her head against his chest. "Comfy."

Adam chuckled almost silently above her. "Well lucky for you, now that I'm getting older you'll finally get what you want."

"You're home," Mia pointed out. "That's all I wanted. The layer of soft chub is just a bonus. You always used to be so rigid to lay against. I could never get comfortable."

"Well, my lacrosse days are far behind me now," Adam told her. She vaguely remembered that he played the sport, but was never allowed to see him play, even after he graduated college and it was just him and his friends getting together for a game twice a month.

When a period of silence passed, Adam continued. "Tell me about your life. You never went into detail in your letters. You still working at the museum, or did your dad talk you into a corporate job after college?"

Nearly every day, Mia counted her blessings that her parents were much like Adam's, which was probably why the families had been close for the last several decades.

Despite Adam's parents having their fortune and working at big companies and despite his brother following in their footsteps, they just wanted their children to be happy. Adam had been in his second year of law school when he finally admitted it wasn't something he wanted to do with the rest of his life. At the time, photography was his hidden passion and when he got up the nerve to tell them he wanted to make a go of it for a living, they supported him fully.

Her parents were the same. They knew she was much like Adam in that way and they'd witnesses his own success when he followed his dreams. Unfortunately, Mia never found something she was passionate about, but got her degree in graphic design because she was good at it and it would be easy to find a job with the growing need. But so long as she was happy and not just sitting on her ass, they were fine with whatever path she chose.

"I still work at the museum. They have me running their website now, but I still do the tour guide thing. I thought about leaving and finding something that pays better, but it isn't easy finding a job that you really love and love everyone you work with. Plus, the hours are flexible."

"And friends?" Adam inquired further. "Please tell me you have other friends besides Zoey? I wasn't exaggerating about getting rid of that one. There's something mentally wrong with her."

Zoey and her were opposites; so much so that when they roomed together their freshman year, Mia thought about finding another placement. Despite them being so different, Mia realized that's what she needed at the time and still needed. She pushed her, fought for her and got her out of her comfort zone, forcing her to live her life outside of the box.

"Zoey's just concerned about me, is all. I fired her from setting me up because she was doing such a terrible job at it. Now she's convinced that I'll start collecting cats and become permanently celibate. I guess at my age I'm supposed to be going out on dates every weekend, kissing a bunch of frogs until I find a prince or something, and since I don't do that, Zoey's convinced I'm defective... or that I'm a terrible kisser since I rarely end up going on a second date."

Adam's right hand made its way into her hair, petting the dark strands. "Are you?"

"Mmm. Happy tickles."

Adam laughed above her again. "I forgot about this; your happy hair coma. You even had your mom buy a book for me with instructions on how to do hair styles. I remember when we'd all be watching Sunday football in your living room and you'd run in, hand me a handful of barrettes and hair ties and tell me to make you pretty."

"My dad made fun of you, until he realized I never asked him and got all jealous," Mia remembered. "He found all these tutorials and tried doing my hair. I looked in the mirror and started crying."

Another laugh. "You didn't answer my question before, you know," Adam pointed out.

Mia tried to think back, but was in her happy hair coma. "What was the question?"

"Are you defective, a bad kisser, or none of the above?"

She wondered if that was something you could ask a guy, but she'd be too scared to hear the answer. "Defective, probably, but aren't we all? Bad kisser... no idea. I was generally the one who declined second dates, so I don't think so. But it's definitely possible since I've only ever kissed a handful of people."

"Fair enough," Adam spoke quietly above her. "So, has Zoey always been pushy about your love life, or is this a new thing? Because I gotta say, she seemed thoroughly invested in it tonight. If she hadn't passed out drunk, she probably would have unzipped my pants and pushed me against you. She's a very... forceful woman."

As Adam continued petting her hair, Mia dragged her fingertips against his upper chest and felt a slight smile form on his face against the top of her head. "She's always been like that. I thought she was annoying about it in college, telling me I had to have as much fun as I could while we were still young. Then we graduated and ended up in the real world and I think she thought I was just waiting to have more of an adult relationship. Like I said, she's just worried about me and gets more blatant about it after a few drinks."

There was one thing still bothering Mia; something she brought up as a passing thought and he'd asked her further about. Now, she hated not knowing the answer to it. But as the wheels in her mind turned, it was also a salvation of sorts.

"I need to ask a favor." One that was so much bigger than he could imagine. One that would not only give her the answer she wanted, but another answer to a question that weighed heavily in her mind since she was barely old enough to understand it herself.

Her two questions were:

Was she a terrible kisser?

And,

Was what she felt for Adam all these years just a silly fantasy getting in her way of living her life?

"Anything."

While Mia could have easily let this moment pass her by and live with regret, it was also a rare opportunity to kiss him with minimal damage to their friendship; so rare it would likely never happen again. If he said no, she'd accept and move on. If he said yes, she could finally find out if her fantasy was a reality or not.

Mia lifted her head from his chest so she could look at him. "Let me kiss you and you can tell me if I'm bad at it because now it's bugging the crap out of me. I've never asked a guy before and I know you'll be honest."

Adam's pale blue-green eyes narrowed on her and he let out a heavy breath through his nose. Whether it was ten seconds that passed or ten minutes, Mia wasn't sure. With the way he was looking at her, his poker face faltering just a little, it felt like hours. "Fine."

Mia's brows furrowed. "Seriously?" She honestly didn't think he'd agree and now that he did, she hadn't a clue how to proceed.

A corner of his lips turned upward, and Adam closed his eyes. "Go for it. Whenever you're ready."

Now that his eyes were closed, Mia took the time to study his relaxed face. At the club, she noticed there was more gray in his hair. Now, as the city lights showed through her curtains, she saw the wrinkles in the corners of his eyes. Her beautiful Adam was getting older. He was just over forty, not very old, but still. Like he'd missed her growing up, she'd missed the forming of his gray and age lines.

"So... is this going to happen?"

Mia shook the thoughts from her head and lowered herself to his lips, remaining there for several moments before placing a single chaste kiss against them.

His eyes remained closed as he spoke. "Is that seriously how you kiss your dates?"

She was well aware that her hesitance showed in her kiss. This was Adam, and it terrified her that if she let herself kiss him the way she wanted, the way she always imagined, he'd see the truth. "I prefer testing the waters before I jump in."

"And now it's time to get your ass in the water because if you want me to judge you based on that, you're getting two out of ten. You're always safe to be yourself with me, Mia. You don't need to hold back."

Before Mia could allow her mind to talk her out of it, she kissed him with slow intimacy, parting his lips with her own and allowing her fear to slip away with each passing moment. Her kisses became harder as she lost herself in them, until they no longer became hers, but his.

The change was so slow and she was completely lost at the moment that Mia hadn't noticed it, but when she felt his hand pull her head deeper against him, she felt it with everything she was. Adam was kissing her back. Not gently. Not politely.

His mouth forced hers to part further and his tongue slid in her mouth, dragging it across the tip of her own tongue until and they moved as one with an indescribable magic. As the sensation surged through her, Mia whimpered against his mouth and her hand gripped the side of his neck.

The sound of vomiting coming from the bathroom across the hall seemed to jolt Adam back into reality and his head dropped back down to the pillow. When Mia opened her eyes to look at him, his own were scrunched closed and his fist was tapping against his forehead. That poker face of his had completely washed away, only leaving them with the harsh facts of what he felt.

He was eighteen years older than herself.

He had known her since the day she entered this world.

He was friends with both her parents.

Their families had been in business together forever.

They were never supposed to kiss.

And so Mia was forced to brush it under the rug for the sake of Adam's sanity. Though she'd always loved him, there was nothing more important to her than having him remain in her life, even if that meant her own heartbreak.

"So, what's my new score?" Mia kept her voice as casual as she could, hoping the shakiness she felt building up in her stomach and up her throat didn't pass through her lips.

Adam's eyelids softened before they opened and he let out a heavy breath, his poker face returning. Maybe he knew what she was doing. Maybe he was still ignorant of all that she felt for him. It didn't matter. If they played the game of denial long enough, they could make it through this. She could keep him, even if he never kissed her again.

"Ten."