It didn't make any sense at all, yet the source was the bible, which revealed the truth far beyond the questioner's boundaries of knowledge as long as it was a question that God wanted to conceal. Tesilid's expression grew serious, for, as confusing as it was, he knew that the answer shouldn't be dismissed as nonsense.
He stretched the boundaries of his mind as he attempted to recall any information that might explain what the Great Bible of Truth had told him. After sifting through his memories, he did recall an incident when he was taken aback by an odd conversation he had once with Ailette. It had been while they were harvesting medicinal herbs from the dungeon of the mermaids.
"I've been under a curse since I was born, and it will cost millions of gold coins as an offering if I want to lift it."
"A curse? What curse?"
"The person I fall in love with will die, and I will die along with them."
For some reason, he felt sure that the memory was related to this situation.
"Could it be...?"
A great turmoil rose from within him, a form of shock and confusion that he could not easily control.
So what happened wasn't a result of the world's hatred toward me? It was because Ailette's curse had been activated? But for that curse to activate, she needs to...
There was only one logical explanation, and the thought of it completely took over his mind as his chest rose, then dropped again. He continued to inhale and exhale in long breaths, yet the tingling feeling that had come over him didn't seem as if it would stop any time soon. Perhaps his body was broken, for he had no idea where this thirst and burning heat was coming from. He raised his clammy palms and rubbed them from his eyes to his chin.
I thought, perhaps... But for it to be true...?
"Wow..."
It took a while for the truth to sink in, during which time he had to continue calming himself down. He had to rub his face several times before he was once again able to mask his expression. Despite the pounding of his heart, he did his best to think rationally. Now was not the time to sit around and bask in the glory of this new realization. He had to find a way to execute the bible's advice.
Tesilid lost himself to his thoughts for quite some time, and it wasn't until after several minutes of aimless musing that he was interrupted.
"What is your last question?"
Tesilid jolted and brought his spinning mind to a halt as he tried to think of his final question.
As the silence persisted, the bible urged him, "Ignorant human, tell me what you wish to know."
"Something I wish to know..." He rolled those words in his mouth like he was savoring them when he was reminded of the one question he'd always wanted to ask. It was a question he asked the Bible of Truth many times throughout many lives yet had never been given an answerâhow could he stop his returns?
Will the Great Bible of Truth be able to answer this question? Tesilid was extremely skeptical of the idea that this book might have an answer when the other did not. And, to be honest, he didn't think he could endure it if he was given yet another hopeless reply. He might even go insane, yet there was still a tiny bit of hope left in his heart. After all, today was the day he realized that he wasn't doomed to a life without light.
He summoned every last bit of courage that existed in his body and asked, "How do I..."
But the moment his lips parted, all the questions he asked in the previous Loops crossed his mind. During Loop Eighteen, he'd asked why he had to return and was told that he was meant to save the world. During Loop Nineteen, he'd asked how he could save the world and was told to kill the three Demon Lords and seal Chaos and Evil in the final dungeon.
Since then, he fully assumed the role of God's clown and asked about strategies on how to save the world until Loop Eighty. It was in Loop Eighty-Nine that he was betrayed by God and the rest of the world before he revisited The Bible of Truth, which was when he started asking about how to stop the Loops altogether.
He was prepared to waste his questions after Loop Eighty-Nine because they were more prayers than anything else by that point. He hoped that his repetitive questions would demonstrate how pitiful, wasteful, and devastating his life was and that this would somehow reach God, who might then grant him a reply. Unfortunately, that never happened. Hence, it was only in Loop Ninety-Nine that he asked a meaningful question after becoming completely resigned to his circumstances. He asked why the world was collapsingâhe asked about the truth.
Since then, several more Loops had gone by, and he even visited the lowest point of hell before arriving in Loop One Hundred and Seventeen. He wanted to ask about how to achieve his everlasting dream.
Death. He also wanted to know how to reach his newfound wish for this timeline.
Ailette Rodeline. Finally, he asked something that could address all of these questions at once.
"What am I supposed to do to become happy?"
He felt a surge of heat climb up his insides as if that one phrase scorched his stomach, seared his lungs, and rose hot and scalding up his throat to make its way past his lips. How great would it be if he could save the world in this Loop for the last time, grow old in a peaceful place, and drift into eternal sleep while holding the hand of the person he loves?
The only thing he wanted was a simple and peaceful life. He wanted something normal. He wanted to live like a human being. This type of wish could not be granted by mechanically sealing Chaos and Evil to save the world. Not even the complete destruction of the world and the obliteration of the core return mechanic would reward him with his dream. And because he knew this so well... It was devastating.
"Haha..."
He forced a laugh to mask his unbearably bitter feelings, filling the air with his empty chuckle. As he had dared to utter a word that never belonged to him, he believed that the bible would simply tell him that it was impossible.
What am I to do once the bible declares the truth? Would it not be better to return to the abyss? He mused that perhaps returning to drink the water from the Well of Immortality would be a good idea. Just like that, he became the most pessimistic person in the world and was staring into the dark and empty space between the gaps below his feet, when the otherworldly voice made the air tremor again.
"By converting."
Never in a million years did he expect to hear an answer, but not only that, the response he got was utterly shocking.
"What?" he asked, stunned.
"Convert. Change the god you serve, and your wish will come true."
The response he received to his reflexive question confirmed that he heard the bible correctly.
Convert? The paradigm that binds the human mind is powerfulâit's difficult for them to change. Worse yet, his identity as a holy knight of a monotheistic story universe did not allow his thoughts and opinions to move beyond the limits of that one god. He was faithful even as his god used him, so he never once dared to nurture the idea of serving a different god besides the Strict Order and Goodness. Yet this was the moment all of those restrictions were completely shattered.
There is more than one god in this world? It must be true if the Great Bible of Truth said so. Tesilid's thought process creaked with shock, like a rusty wheel trying to spin, but it still worked desperately to accept his new reality. There was only one other God-like figure he could think of besides the Strict Order and Goodness.
"Am I supposed to serve the Chaos and Evil?"
But verbalizing the thought sounded wrong instantly. He was attempting to make his way around the confusion caused by his ignorance when the bible slammed shut and the chains began wrapping around its cover again.
"You have exhausted your three questions. Your access has now been terminated."
The books that formed the space began crumbling down into the abyss as the Great Library of Eternity urged Tesilid to leave. It seemed that using the Great Bible of Truth had the same effect as clearing a boss to close a dungeon. He had to evacuate if he didn't want to end up in the landfill of the Demon Realm, so he descended the already crumbling staircase of books.
Thankfully, the exit gate that would bring him back to reality was waiting for him at the bottom of the stairs, which he walked through to return to the highest floor of the Mage Tower. The showering stars of the domed ceiling of the tower and the old collection of books welcomed him, yet his mind was still in disarray.
Pacing about the room, he plunged deep into thought, for he had no idea how he was to reassemble the broken framework of his mind. He was so preoccupied, he didn't notice that someone was approaching.
Step, step...
The steps matched his exactly, and he turned reflexively to find a person he had not expected to see.
With an oppressive energy, the other asked, "What are you doing here?"
It was as if he was staring into a mirror, except that the man had long black hair. Tesilid could feel cold sweat break out on his palms the moment he saw him, yet he couldn't help but chuckle.
So killing Leviathion wasn't enough, huh? It was almost impressive how many obstacles he was forced to overcome. And now, apparently, the world had sent his other self to kill Tesilid Argente.