Chapter thirteen

"My parents left okay? Just like that without any goodbye. They had promised to be back that night, but when the doorbell sounded, there were cops by the door who announced the news of their death to me. I was shattered, broken in front of them. Then, I realized nothing good ever lasts. Just like that, they had left my life, not even a warning, they just stopped to exist. Then my grandma came into my life, she tried her best to love me enough to make me forget my parents. Three years later, she died. Slumped and fell. Then I realize they all always leave. No one's ever there to stay, no matter how well they love you. And it's the same in a relationship. It never gets old. They lose interest or decide to cheat or they just walk away..."

He had just expressed a part he had never told me about. He didn't talk much about his parents, just the fact that they had an accident and died. But it gave him not enough reasons to have his kind of thoughts about others.

"I've been with you Mason for more than six years. I saw every reason to leave you with the kids and walk away, but I didn't. I had just one reason to hold on to you, my happiness and that of the ones I call my family. Your parents left, doesn't mean I would too. You know, you should let go of that illusion. It's eaten deep into you and that's the truth"

"I wanted these kids, to show myself that it wasn't hard, to stick with them forever. I could do it and be an amazing father. I didn't want any commitment so I don't get broken.

But I met you instead Avey, and years later, I realized I was wrong, but I couldn't bring myself to accept that fact. I thought what if you wake up one day and realize you wanted an out, you didn't want to be part of it? What if you find someone, one who truly completes you and you decide to leave? I'm afraid, I was afraid of loosing again and so, I felt it was better to give myself no reason to. I'm sorry"

I gave a chuckle in disappointment. Even after all this years, he didn't know me. I had failed myself. I had dreamt of an amazing family but it had gotten out of my reach. I had two kids and that was a red flag for any man.

"I truly wish I could go back. Take back all the years I spent blindly, trying to love you, trying to see you as someone who wanted a real family. I wish I could take back all the years I wasted, praying and hoping you would see the importance of family. But I'm gonna do that Mason before it's too late. You deserve better than me and I truly deserve better than your sorry ass. Do well to take care of your kids okay, and true, lemme remain just it, the miserable mother of your kids who wanted to be more than that so badly that she didn't see you suffering from within. I can't stay, you know it. Go sort it out, the issue you have with yourself"

"Avey!" he called as I was about to walk off.

I paused and stared at him ready to listen to whatever he had to say.

"I was finally going to ask you to  marry me..." he said reaching out to his suit jacket as he brought out the jewellery box from earlier.

He opened it and an engagement ring was sitting right in it.

"And what stopped you?" I asked.

"I wanted to share that special moment with you. I was gonna open up, I wanted that moment to be just about us, I wanted to feel really loved"

There it was, I gave a sarcastic laughter. And then a smirk appeared on my face.

"Really?" I questioned.

"I would have never accepted. I've  thought about it, it's taken you this long to propose, then you tell me, how long's it gonna take us to be married?"

"You need help Mason, you desperately do"