THE NIGHT IS A BLUR. The game, the crowd, winning. I still canât believe it.
Seeing that Cup, being on the team presented with it, and watching Diedrich carry it into the locker room and lift it into the air â¦
The celebration with the team is over-the-top and manic. We all drink from the Cup before Diedrich puts his newborn baby in it. I wouldâve spent all night drinking from it had that not happened. After that, all I could think about was how many babies had been placed in that thing and how many had pooped in it.
Itâs almost midnight before we finally leave the locker room, heading out. The team is meeting at a bar on the Strip, but before Ezra and I join them, weâve got a stop to make first.
Ezra and I hold hands in the elevator the whole way to the rooftop of the hotel Tripp said to meet them at.
When the doors open, obnoxiously loud cheers come from one of the rooftop cabanas, and the first person I see is Tripp standing in the entrance, pumping the air with both fists.
âYouâre a lot happier than I was expecting you to be,â I say as he attacks Ezra with a hug.
âDonât get me wrong, Iâm pissed you guys won.â Heâs smiling though, so heâs obviously not pissed. âBut a queer collective win is a very close second to winning ourselves. A gay just won the Stanley Cup. Thatâs epic!â
Ezra shrugs. âClearly the only reason Iâm dating Anton. Leveling up from awesome to epic is my destiny.â
We join the others in the cabana, and even though I still donât know these guys all that well, it feels like coming home. Foster, Ollie, Oskar, and Tripp are here, but Soren and West are both missing. Ayri still isnât sure if he wants to join, but I do.
And as if Tripp can read the thoughts going through my head, he asks, âYou finally in, Hayes?â
âYep,â Ezra answers for me. âTonight is his initiation.â
Ollie claps his hands, grin stretching across his face. âPerfect. Itâs been a while since Iâve had some Macallan.â
âMacallan?â I ask, looking around at them all.
âItâs a queer collective tradition. When you join us, you solemnly swear to never take a sip of Macallan outside of an initiation.â
Thatâs definitely not what I expected. Or, not all I expected. âThatâs it?â
âOh, and you have to buy the bottle.â
âOf course I do.â But hey, whatâs a few thousand dollars when Iâve just won the Stanley Cup? âYou know, this is a thousand percent tamer than what I was imagining.â
Oskar snorts. âWeâre not a frat. Weâre a group of highly sophisticated gentlemen,â he says with a shitty British accent.
âWho like to beat the crap out of other guys at work,â Foster adds.
âCan you blame me for picturing the worst when Ezra is in charge of these things?â
He pats my arm seriously. âIf youâre that distressed over getting off easy, I can paddle your ass later.â
âThatâs what he said,â Ollie mutters.
âIâm starting to understand why Ezra loves you guys so much.â I leave to buy the expensive-as-fuck alcohol, and I get the feeling thereâs a good chance Ezra and I will be puking by the time the night is over. Tripp joins me at the bar to help carry the glasses.
âNo Dex tonight?â I ask.
âHe wanted to come, but I said it was for the collective.â
âWhy?â
âThis is my space. Maybe that sounds a bit childish, but the next hour or so is for us. Thatâs sacred. Iâll catch up with him later.â
I can read the subtext in his words though. He needs space. I have no idea how long heâs been in love with Dex, but I bet it canât be easy.
His mood lightens considerably when we get back to the cabana, and itâs like our own oasis on top of the world. The lights from the Strip are all around us, soft music playing and mixing with the laughter and conversation around us.
We pour the Macallan for everyone, but as I go to take a sip, Ezraâs hand catches my arm.
âYouâre forgetting the most important part of the initiation.â
âI knew there had to be more to it.â
He pats my hand. âItâs just a toast, calm down.â
âA toast?â
âYep. All you have to do is lift your glass and say âHeyâo, Iâm gayâo.ââ
âOr however-you-identifyâo,â Foster adds. âBecause Iâm bi.â
ââHeyâo, Iâm biâoâ sounds like youâre saying ,â Ezra says. âAnd it doesnât rhyme.â
I lift my glass. âCheerâo to being queerâo? Is that inclusive?â
Ezraâs eyes soften toward me. âYouâre perfect.â
âI know.â
We all cheers and drink down the extremely expensive whiskey that tastes like regular whiskey. At least to me.
âYou know,â Ezra says after a few moments. âOne day, when we have a queer member in every team in the league, weâll need to book out the whole rooftop. Now thatâs a goal.â
Ollie shifts. âWell, you might need to start looking for someone new to cover New York.â
âWhat?â I lean forward, pretty sure I know where this is going but not wanting to hear it anyway. NHL players, weâre all for the sport. Itâs our lives. So when someone brings up the ârâ word, I feel it in my soul, because I know thatâs going to be me one day. To have to walk away and leave this part of my life behind.
Well ⦠I glance at Ezra.
of it behind. With any luck, Ezra will be right there alongside me.
âIâve got one year left on my contract,â Ollie says, âand I donât think Iâm going to renew it.â
âWhat will you do?â
âLennon was talking about creating my own hockey segment on his sports show. I donât know if being on TV is for me, but Iâd love to give it a try.â
âThatâs awesome.â
Ezra lets out a long sigh. âWhose ass am I going to check out when we play New York now?â
He gives me an evil look, and I squeeze his thigh in warning.
âI think the right answer here is your boyfriendâs,â Tripp answers, and the others laugh.
âReal talk though.â Ezra leans forward. âNHL or not, youâre queer collective for life. Same as Soren. Same as any of us. We donât need to replace you because while you might not be a hockey player anymore, youâll still be one of us.â
He and Ollie share a smile. The kind that can only be understood by them. Ollie and Soren were first, but Ezra wasnât far behind them. He came out after being signed to his first team. They only ever had each other, and I understand why he needed this. Why we all do.
âBetter make it one hell of a last season, then,â Foster says.
Ollie lifts his glass. âCheers to that.â
We all tap our drinks together, but then Tripp lets out a loud groan.
I turn in the direction heâs looking and see Dex heading right for us. At the look on his face, Tripp goes from annoyed to concerned in a second flat.
âWhatâs wrong?â Thereâs an edge to his voice that sounds like heâs ready to attack whoever made Dex look so dejected.
Dex steps up into the cabana, takes Trippâs glass, and downs the entire contents.
âFuck, Dex,â Ezra says. âYou donât shoot this shit. Youâre supposed to sip it.â
âWhatâs the point?â He slumps into Trippâs side and face-plants into his shoulder.
I exchange a look with Ezra.
âAh, Dex? Whatâs up, buddy?â Ezra asks.
âJessica.â
Tripp immediately scowls. âWhatâs she done now?â
âShe used the â
â word again.â
Iâm confused. âIdiot?â
â
.â Dex looks up to pout at Tripp. âIs it true? Am I an irresponsible fuckboy who will never be ready to get married? I can commit.â The panicked look on his face and the way he tugs at his collar says otherwise. âI canâcould. If I wanted to. Obviously.â
âUh-huh.â Tripp pats his head, avoiding eye contact with the rest of us.
âHug me, Trippy.â Dex pulls Trippâs arm around him and buries his face again. Trippâs eyes fall closed, and the poor guy looks in pain.
âHey, Dex,â Ezra says, standing suddenly. âYou look like you could use some shots. Come get them with me.â
The two of them disappear, and Tripp slumps forward, letting out a long breath.
âYou okay?â I ask.
âYep,â he says, sounding more like heâs trying to convince himself than us.
âYou need to get over that,â Ollie warns.
âIâm working on it.â
âThe best way to get over someone is to get under someone else,â Oskar says at the exact moment one of the servers arrives to collect empty glasses and bottles from the table.
The server almost trips over himself and then turns bright red.
âHey,â Oskar says to him. âThis is our man Tripp. Heâs a professional hockey player and is bendy.â
âHi, Iâm going to go die now.â Tripp tries to get up, but Oskar pushes him back down on his seat.
âWhat do you say?â Oskar says.
The server looks back toward the bar and then to Tripp. âI get off in an hour.â
As he walks away, Oskar calls after him, âI promise Tripp can get you off faster than that.â
Tripp sinks farther into his seat while the rest of us laugh.
Ezra comes back, and I pull him down into my lap. Iâve never been more grateful to have found him than I am at this exact moment.
âWhat are you doing?â he asks playfully.
I press a hard kiss to his lips. âHolding my prize.â
âNormally Iâd call you out on being cheesy, but do go on.â
I tug him down so my lips are pressed to his ear. âRemember what I said our first time together?â
âWhat part?â
âThat when you see me lift that Stanley Cup, all youâre going to think about is me fucking you.â
Ezra shivers.
âDid it work?â I ask.
âNo.â
Well, fuck.
He pulls back and laughs at the look on my face. âBecause Iâm constantly thinking about it. Always. Whenever I look at you, whether you have the Stanley Cup or not.â
I stroke his cheek. âOkay, I like your way better.â
When he kisses me, itâs softer, slower. âWant to head out soon?â
âYeah, we should probably meet the team.â
âWe should ⦠after a celebratory quickie?â
âYouâre on.â
âAh, guys?â Foster says. âWe can hear you.â
The others shake their heads at us.
âWell then,â I say, standing and taking Ezraâs hand. âI guess we donât need to make an excuse to leave, then, do we?â I grab the bottle on the table. âAnd weâll be taking this with us. See you guys in a few weeks.â
Ezraâs organized a trip with them that Iâm more than ready for.
We leave the way we came, hand in hand, and when the elevator doors slide closed, I step in close. âWhere are we going?â
âIâve got a room.â
âSmart man.â
âIâve been telling you this the whole time.â He squeezes my hand. âWeâre going to be celebrating for a bit, but once thatâs finished ⦠we have the whole summer. Just us. No practice, no games, no hockey.â
âThat sounds perfect.â
âAnd I was thinking, since youâre not in love with your place, maybe, while you look for something else, you could stay with me?â
âMove in with you?â
âIf you want,â he hurries to say. âNo pressure. Weâve been basically together the whole season, and letâs face it, with all this free time, Iâm going to want to spend at least ninety percent of it naked, and being naked at home alone feels sort of sadââ
I cut him off with a kiss. âLetâs do it.â
âYeah?â
âYouâre pretty great, you know that?â
His smile is huge. âYou know, I distinctly remember you saying youâd never say those words.â
âI can admit when Iâm wrong.â
âYouâll be doing that a lot, then.â Ezra kisses me. âBut youâre pretty great too, babe.â
The thing is, nothing with us is guaranteed. Our careers, our teams, even the cities we live in. I want to spend as much time as I can with Ezra while I have it, so then if we are ever separated, weâll be stronger and ready to face that together too.
The NHL might be a big part of our lives now, but that wonât always be the case.
Ezra will be though.
I can feel it.
No matter what happens, no matter what we go through, weâre going to do it together.
Boyfriends who win Stanley Cups together stay together.
Thatâs my superstition.
And Iâm sticking to it.