Chapter 31: Twenty-Six

I had finally gotten a bit of my motivation back two days later. I wasn't in tip-top shape but I was feeling... better, I suppose. I wasn't glued to my bed and telling anyone who came into my room to get the fuck out and I actually got out of bed. It was a slow process, whenever this happened, it always was. But brick by brick I'd build myself up until I could stand to look at myself in the mirror.

With the life I lived, I believed that was as good as it was going to get.

I'd barely seen Feyre in the last few days, but it didn't stop me from noticing the small things. Like how she'd been going out with Tamlin more often, she painted a lot as well.

I was happy for her.

But today I decided I would find my sister. I missed her.

I stayed true to my plans finding her laying in the garden just looking at the skies. I was silent as I walked over and lay next to her.

"What are you doing?" I asked as I looked at the sky. It reminded me of how it felt to fly in them. I smiled to myself a bit at the memory.

I definitely wasn't ready for that again, but I enjoy the memory.

Feyre sighed, "I miss everyone." She paused, "Do you think they'll even remember us in a few years?"

I sighed in turn, "I don't know." I replied, "We've been dealt a shitty hand and we just have to deal with it."

I knew it wasn't the answer she was looking for. She wished I'd say 'of course, they will. They're our family' but the truth was I didn't know. There was no way to know. I wasn't going to give my sister false hope that would only hurt more.

There was a minute of silence. The two of us just watched the clouds move along the sky as they were replaced by new ones. I heard rustling next to me and looked over to see Feyre now on her elbows looking at me with an evaluating gaze.

"Where have you been? It's like you've been a ghost."

I shrugged as I looked at my sister, "I've been dealing. It's a lot, I guess. I just needed a minute to sort myself out." My sister seemed to think on that sentence before she reluctantly nodded and moved on.

"It's different here." She stated as she laid back down, "I'm confused."

I thought for a moment as I nodded, "It's confusing."

Out of the blue, Feyre began giggling, "What?" I asked.

"It's just—it's just," She said in between her laughter, "That cloud, it kind of looks like Nesta." She burst out laughing this time.

I looked up at the sky searching for the right cloud—oh.

I couldn't stop my own laughter at the sight. I slapped at hand to my mouth to try to contain it, but I just couldn't.

Up in the sky was a cloud that looked just like my eldest sister, except it, was so accurate she was crossing her arms looking like she was pouting.

Maybe the clouds in Prythian had a sense of humor. Whatever it was, I was thankful. This felt normal. Like we were back home and just having fun outside. There were times when I just wished I hadn't grown up. That I could just be an innocent little kid forever.

Unfortunately, wishes don't always come true.

Our laughter cooled after a moment. And we sat in silence as we thought. "Let's go inside," Feyre spoke as she got up from the ground and offered me her hand. I quickly took it and she practically yanked me off the ground, causing me to stumble and trip as I tried to land on my feet.

Feyre doubled over laughing as she pointed at me like a young child.

I smiled, "Oh, you are so dead." I spoke as I quickly got up from the ground and brushed off my clothes.

Feyre's laughing stopped as she tried to keep a serious face but epically failed. She smiled once more before she broke out into a sprint and began running back to the house.

"Hey, no fair!" I yelled before taking off myself trying to catch up.

When we both reached the manor we were both severely out of breath. But one look at each other sent us into another fit of laughter.

And for a moment I think we both felt at home.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Feyre had spent most of the day showing me her paintings, there was even one of me, in which I looked absolutely fabulous.

I was feeling a lot better after talking with Feyre and just having fun for the day. I think I'd just needed a friend.

The two of us had ventured outside hearing some sort of ruckus going on. We cleared a small hill only to be greeted by a whole group of faeries carrying things into the woods; tables, chopped wood, flowers. Pretty much everything.

The two of us stared at them for a moment wondering what was going on. Until I felt a third presence join us. Luckily I knew the prick.

Feyre looked towards Tamlin and back to the faeries, "What are those?" she asked.

"They're setting up bonfires— for calanmai. It's tonight."

"For what?" Feyre clarified.

Calanmai. Calanmai. Calanmai. I knew I'd heard it before, I just couldn't for the life of me remember what it was. I swore I had a very selective memory, only remembering the things of the smallest detail.

"Fire night?" Tamlin asked. Another familiar word. Yet, I still couldn't place it.

I shook my head, "We don't celebrate holidays in the human realm. Not after your people left. In some places, it's forbidden."

Feyre continued, "We don't even remember the names of your gods. What does Fire Night celebrate?"

Tamlin rubbed his neck; the only sign he was nervous was, "it's just a spring ceremony. We light bonfires and...the magic that we create helps regenerate the land for the year ahead."

"How do you create the magic?" I asked skeptically. He had trailed off at that part and I didn't miss his nerves. What was he hiding?

"There's a ritual. But it's...very faerie." He clenched his jaw and began leading us back to the manor—in the opposite direction, "You might see more faeries around than usual—faeries from this court, and from other territories, who are free to wander across the borders tonight."

Just great, more faeries. Maybe I'd actually have some fun tonight.

"I thought the blight had scared many of them away?" Feyre questioned more as we walked. I stuffed my hands in my pockets as I listened intently.

"It has—but there will be a number of them. Just...both of you stay away from them all. You'll be safe in the house, but if you run into one before we light the fires at sundown, ignore them."

Kill them, I believe that's what he really meant. Maybe I'd read it wrong. Oh, well. My directions were better anyway.

"And we're not invited to your ceremony?" I asked as I looked up at the High Lord.

His head turned to me with an odd look, "No. You're not. Either of you."

Translation: You are invited. You should go.

"Alright. If you insist." I spoke. Tamlin gave me a scolding look as if he knew where my thoughts had wandered.

We walked in silence the rest of the way. I was already planning how I'd get to the festivities. Tamlin surely wouldn't provide my transportation so I'd have to find my own.

As we entered the garden I noticed Tamlin had gone rigid. His breathing had begun to come in gasps. I felt it. The cold slithering along my bones, it felt like the naga, but different. More alive. Tamlin turned to us, "Stay hidden, no matter what you overhear, don't come out." He pushed both Feyre and me down behind a bush and when I looked back, he was gone.

I'd give him hell for that later, but right now I was focused on keeping us safe and listening to what was going on.

There was the sound of footsteps on a gravel path from Tamlin and Lucien. That's where Tamlin must have gone. Feyre began to move, but I stopped her with a hand on her arm. She looked over to me and I shook my head just as Tamlin's growl ripped through the air.

"I know what day it is," Tamlin spoke not to Lucien. I assumed he was glamouring the other person, seeing as they were invisible to me.

A low horrific voice replied, "You're continued behavior is garnering a lot of interest at court." the voice was dark and evil sending shivers through my body, "She has begun wondering—wondering why you haven't given up yet. And why four Naga wound up dead not too long ago."

Despite the dire situation, I smiled to myself. This "she" had seemed to cause much trouble, maybe it was good I'd inconvenienced her.

And it was oh, so much fun.

"Tamlin's not like other fools." Lucy's voice rang out, "If she expected bowed heads, then she's more of an idiot than I thought."

The voice hissed and my blood chilled at the awful noise, "Speak you so ill of she who holds your fate in her hands? With one word, she could destroy this pathetic estate. She wasn't pleased when she heard of you dispatching your warriors." the voice began speaking directly to Tamlin, "But, as nothing has come of it, she has chosen to ignore it."

There was a deep growl from the High Lord, but he seemed to remain calm as he spoke, "tell her I'm getting sick of cleaning up the trash she dumps on my borders."

Creatures like the Naga and Bogge?

The invisible voice chuckled, "She sets them loose as gifts—and reminders of what will happen if you try to break the terms of—"

"He's not." Lucien snarled, "Now, get out. We have enough of your ilk swarming on the borders— we don't need you defiling our home too. For that matter, stay the hell out of the cave. It's not some common road for filth like you to travel through as they please."

The invisible thing laugh again, a horrible, vicious sound, "Though you have a heart of stone, Tamlin," it said, "You certainly keep a host of fear inside it." the voice sank to a whisper, "Don't worry, High Lord." it spat his title—not that I really minded, "All will be right as rain soon enough."

"Burn in hell," Lucien replied. The thing laughed, there was a flap of wings before the two males let out a sigh in relief. I stood from the bush.

"What kind of hellish demon was that?" I asked, crossing my arms and shifting my weight to one side. Feyre stood up as well, brushing off the leaves from her clothes.

"What did you hear?" Lucien asked both of us.

"Nothing." Feyre replied, "I– well nothing I understood."

I understood bits and pieces but I was still missing something important. I could feel it, it's why nothing was piecing together.

"Are either of you going to answer my question?" I added again, "What was that thing?"

Tamlin sighed, "There are certain faeries in Prythian that inspired the legends you humans are so afraid of. Some, like that one, are myth given flesh."

I wanted a species name. Since I couldn't see the creature, I would have liked to give a face to the name.

I was extraordinarily good at remembering species, techniques, tactics, helpful information, and other important things. It's just the less important things like people, holidays, and things similar to that is when my memory decides to fail me.

"If the Attor saw them—"

My blood practically froze.

"It didn't." Tamlin interrupted.

"Are you certain it—"

"It didn't." Tamlin hissed.

"An Attor." I repeated, "God those things are nasty little things." I shuddered, "Disgusting. I can't believe I was within fifteen feet of that ilk."

Tamlin and Lucien gave me an odd look, "You've seen an Attor before?" Tamlin asked me, his voice holding a serious tone. I turned my eyes on him.

I smiled at him, "You see this is the exact reason I love knowing things others don't. It just makes the game all the more fun." I inhaled and looked to the sky before turning my gaze back to three of them, "See you all at dinner." I stuffed my hands into my pockets once again as I sauntered towards the manor.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

I was back, baby. And I was better than ever. Maybe I needed a friend, or maybe I needed just a little danger. I didn't care.

I felt fucking good. I was in the lead and Cauldron, I was loving it.

Maybe I needed that run-in with the Attor, to break me out of the cage I stuck myself in for a few weeks.

If danger was what I needed, that wasn't going to be a problem. I was practically a magnet.

Whatever it was, I wouldn't let myself become that shell again. I just wouldn't.

I had crawled into bed that night with a smile as I listened to the sound of drums ringing across the land on Calanmai.

─── · 。ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

A/N: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, Dani's back and it's Calanmai! I'm so excited.