Chapter 46: Wish

DANICA

Under the glow of the street lamps, we strolled side by side. I was leading us to the usual spot where Death always seemed to find me. I couldn’t help but voice the question that had been nagging at me.

“Why does it bother you so much?” I asked. “Me and Hugo? Why? You know he’s a good guardian angel. Don’t you trust him?”

He scoffed at my words. “Good guardian angel,” he repeated, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Maybe to you he is.”

I was aware of Hugo’s flaws, his inner demons, but I still believed in his goodness.

“Guardian angels aren’t supposed to fall in love,” he finally said, breaking the silence that had settled between us.

“You don’t know if he loves me or not…,” I began, but Klaus cut me off.

“It doesn’t matter. He’s already too attached to you,” he said, pausing for a moment. “In the human world, if you do something wrong, you go to jail. In our world, the punishment is much more severe. You’re exiled from the mythical realm,” he explained.

“Being part of this world means everything to us. Being forced to live like a human would be torture. When you go from mythical to mundane, the mundane world seems pointless, dull, and devoid of any purpose. In the mythical world, you actually do something that makes a difference. Like right now, for instance.”

“So, you’re worried about Hugo?” I asked, prompting a derisive laugh from him.

“I’m not worried about him,” he retorted. “I don’t really care what he does. Even when I was told to look up to him, I never could. Not because I didn’t think he was great and powerful, because I did. I just can’t idolize someone I don’t know… This situation just proves my point that he isn’t as great as everyone always thought.”

“Then what?” I asked. “Why does it bother you?”

“Because it’s wrong. People can’t just do whatever they want, ignoring every law… that’s not how it works,” he said. “There are reasons for laws like this… guardians can’t protect their charges effectively when emotions get involved.”

“Are you jealous?” I asked, trying to keep pace with him.

“Jealous of what?” he snapped.

“Because he’s done something you wish you could do? You want to love too, don’t you?” I asked, but he turned to me, his face twisted in anger.

“Don’t talk nonsense,” he snapped, but then seemed to regain his composure. “I’m sorry.”

“Is it nonsense though? You dedicate your entire life to protecting others. Wouldn’t it be nice to have someone? If you all wanted it, couldn’t you just say something to the one in charge? Loving someone couldn’t be that bad,” I said.

“You don’t get it, Danica. No one listens to lowlifes like us.”

“Lowlifes?” I asked, confused. “None of you are lowlifes. You have powers that humans can only dream of.”

Klaus rolled his eyes. “Our powers are weak and we’re never treated as equals. We’re bound to someone, expected to protect and die for them. There’s nothing enviable about that,” he said.

I stopped in my tracks, right in front of the park entrance where Death usually waited.

“You don’t like this…” I said, watching as he turned his back to me. But he also stopped, and I suddenly understood. “You don’t like being a guardian angel. You’re forced to do it. You hate protecting me, or anyone for that matter. You’d rather live a carefree life like a human, wouldn’t you?”

I saw him glance up at the sky. “I never asked for this. I never would have chosen this life,” he said, turning to face me. “How would you feel about living a life where you don’t even have a name until someone decides to give you one? You were the one who gave me a name that I actually liked and wanted to be called by. But I wanted that a long time ago. You have no idea how much I yearn for a normal, mundane life where I’m not burdened with any mythical responsibilities, where I don’t have to worry about this world. I just want to live. I want to have a family, I want to have something of my own, even if it’s just a one-room apartment with a low-paying job. That’s all I want. But I can’t have it!”

“Can’t you just escape from all this? Run away?” I asked, perhaps naively, but I was desperate to find a solution for him. I wanted him to have a chance to live the life he desired.

“Do you really think I haven’t tried to escape? It’s not that easy. I can’t just run away. There’s no life outside of this. It’s either live under duress or not live at all,” he confessed. His words shattered my heart, knowing he was trapped here, living a life he never chose.

Klaus was visibly upset, his anger and frustration palpable.

“I’m sorry,” I murmured, only to be cut off by him.

“No,” he said, shutting his eyes. “I’m here complaining about my problems while you’re potentially facing death to save everyone. I should be the one apologizing,” he admitted. “We should get going,” he suggested, attempting to shift the topic.

“Seeking freedom isn’t stupid, Klaus. Regardless of how big or small your problems seem in comparison to others, it doesn’t make them any less significant or deserving of attention,” I told him, capturing his attention. “For what it’s worth, I hope you find it,” I added.

He forced a smile and nodded in response. “Thank you,” he said.

Just then, I noticed Death sitting on a park bench behind him. Klaus must have seen him too.

“I’ll wait for you here. You should go now, there’s still a lot to do,” he said.

I approached Death, leaving Klaus leaning against a tree. Death was gazing at the pond in front of him.

“Dad…” I called out, sitting down next to him.

“How are the preparations coming along?” he asked, making it clear he was aware of everything.

I sighed and nodded. “From what I’ve heard, it’s not going too badly. There’s just not much I can contribute…” I admitted, then corrected myself. “Unless you count dying for it.”

We sat in silence for a while until he turned to face me.

“You don’t need my help?” he asked, a smirk playing on his lips.

“Can you even help?” I asked, unsure.

“No,” he replied, laughing.

I couldn’t help but roll my eyes. “Why even ask then?” I retorted.

“You were looking for me,” he pointed out.

“I didn’t realize I needed a reason,” I said, causing him to chuckle.

“There doesn’t need to be a reason, but I’m sure there is one this time,” he said. I had come here hoping for something, even if it was just a goodbye from my father.

“If you’re hoping I can save you from dying, I can’t. That’s beyond my power. If you want me to bring anyone to the energy field, I can only bring myself, but I don’t radiate much positive energy. If I’m there, it’s just empty space,” he said, looking me in the eyes.

“But I do want you to try your hardest. Yes, the world is counting on you, but don’t do it for the world. Do it because you can, because you have the power. Use your power for good, Danica. Do this for you, to prove to yourself that this is who you truly are, that there’s goodness in your soul,” he advised.

“And I know you might be scared, but everyone’s scared of something. Don’t let it frighten you. Use that fear to prove that this is worth fighting for.”

I hugged him, burying my face in his cold chest.

“Where will I go if I die?” I asked.

He laughed. “Let your imagination decide. That’s all you get,” he said, causing a single tear to roll down my cheek.

“Will you be there?” I asked.

“Someone has to watch over you when your soul leaves your body,” he said simply. He then leaned away from me and pulled something from his pocket. A shiny gold dime. He took my hand and placed it in my palm.

I looked up at him, his face serious. “It’s a death wish. You can ask for anything. I can’t bring back the dead, or heal the dying, and I can’t interfere with gods. Be reasonable,” he warned, leaning in closer. “You only get one, use it wisely.”

And then, like a mist, he was gone. My hand was frozen, the dime still in my grasp.

What could I wish for when I was teetering on the edge of life and death?

How could I use it to help me?