â CHRISâ
"Ready?" Thion's arm draped over my shoulders as we walked down the hallway.
"She'll say no," I told him again.
My eyes stayed glued to the back of Ari's head. She was a couple of feet in front of us, occasionally getting lost in the crowd with her arm looped with Julia's.
The guys and I had the idea that this year, instead of all of us just agreeing to go together or finding dates, we were going to ask the girls to go with usâcollectively. No one was one-on-one, it was still us as a group but this way we're all going together but individually. It makes no sense but a lot of sense. We're all each other's dates basically and no one's linked to one person.
"She doesn't want to go to prom," I said firmly. "And I rather us not ask her if I already know the answer." I really just wanted to dodge the rejection and disappointment altogether. "And you remember what happened the last time I-"
"Rich, I'll punch you in your throat right now, don't even start that shit." His arm tightened around my shoulder and I rolled my eyes. "That had nothing to do with you and everything with that crazy fucker. Chill out." He jerked me playfully, but I really didn't have a great history with asking Ari to school dances. The first time was enough.
"Besides," he continued, "we should just walk up to the table and tell her to move so we can ask the rest of the girls to go to prom?" I didn't say anything because he was right. He always was. "It'll be aight. We're gonna ask her anyway. Cool?"
I nodded, but all I could think was that she was going to say no. I really didn't want her to because I can't...
Prom will be a nightmare without her, and I'll end up being an asshole on a low the entire night until my friends kick me out.
Thion laughed like he could hear my thoughts and steered me down the hall as the girls disappeared through some double doors toward the staircase.
"Come on," he said. "the guys have the flowers and stuff ready."
He jerked me lightlyâplayfully. I shook my head with a laugh and shoved him away.
"Get off me."
Grinning, he laughed and pulled me back into him. I shook my head again, but I couldn't help my amusement. Thion was one of the most affectionate guys I've ever met. It's overwhelming sometimes.
"You know I don't swing that way," I said mockingly, still trying to get out of his hold only for him to wrap both his arms around my shoulders.
Kids stared without a care as we went down the halls. It was a lot more than usual ever since those photos and videos circulated the school with Thion and Nate.
And because I'm not as unbothered as my friend, my face got hot with embarrassment. Not with what happened between the two, but just the staring in general. There are times when it unsettles me a lot more than others.
"Could've fooled me. You blushing," he shot back and I knew he had to be grinning wider.
"Cause people are staring too hard."
He made a sound, dropping one arm but keeping the other loose around my shoulders. "You'll get over that soon."
That was one thing he kept saying and it all had to do with me going to college and how I'm going to miraculously change when I do.
It was my turn to make a sound. I didn't believe his prophecy, but I didn't disagree with it entirely either. It's going to be a whole year away from home, by myself, making my own decisions and being surrounded by people doing the same, so it's not impossible.
"Yo, Nathion!" someone called the second we made it through the set of doors that led to the lobby. "You just running through these white boys, huh!"
We both stopped and while it didn't take me more than a second to find the person who that came from. Thion slowly turned his head and I'm sure the look he fixed him with wasn't an amused one because the guy's cocky grin fell until he was just smiling.
He held his hands up, backing away even though he's not close to us. "It's a joke," he called. He tried to act laid back, but even from here I saw that he was nervous. "Seriously, man! I'm kidding."
If people weren't looking a second ago, they were now. Thion getting into a fight right now is the last thing this school wants.
The worse part is, we knew the guy. We weren't friends with him but he's one of those guys we just knew. He's on the lacrosse team and I forgot his name but I don't talk to him as much as Thion does. So, he's more of a familiar face to me.
"Just a couple of weeks left," I reminded him.
Since what happened at the party him and Nate, they've been getting teased and mocked a lot. It's not something they didn't already know would happen, but you'd think some of these kids would grow up. Then again, it is high school and most of them are still premature. And won't be dying down yet because it's only Wednesday.
Thion had been handling it a lot better than Nate though. For one, Thion knows how to control his emotions. Half the time he either ignores it or looks straight at whoever's trying to bother him and grins. He doesn't regret it. But the only reason he gets pissed about it is because of Nate. He is more sensitive. He's not used to the spotlight outside of our group of friends and there's a video of him kissing one of the most well-known guys around school, so he doesn't get a break. A lot more people are noticing and talking to him now and it makes him uncomfortable. And they all think he's gay. In their eyes, Thion isn't gay, but the short guy with the Bieber cut and glasses is.
It's really messed up even though they all knew it was a dare. Even the people who weren't there know, but they shouldn't be making their own conclusions because they don't know Nate. But what can any of us do?
Moving his arm off my shoulders, I placed a hand on Thion's and gave him a small shove forward to keep walking. He did and I breathed out. If he started, only security could pull him away.
Thion pointed at the guy threateningly but kept moving. "That's why I let ya girl fuck me last year," he said instead, and by the look on the guy's face, that was the hardest blow for him. He stared at Thion with his mouth open while the hall erupted in gasps, laughs, and groups of kids getting loud. "And I'd do it again. Sit the fuck back, guppy."
I grinned but couldn't stop my laugh. I actually remembered the night that happened. We'd all been at the beach basically all day. We were there until night fell and ended up having a bonfire. A bunch of people came and made it a party and Thion had disappeared for a while. When he'd come back, he'd told me all about it. Not quite vividly but it got there. And she was on top.
He wasn't even sorry about it, because he said she seduced him, and her boyfriend, the guy currently still gaping at Thion, wasn't exactly a gentleman. He didn't treat her right, so she went elsewhere. And if there was anyone who girls went to to be treated right...
They're not dating anymore, and she graduated last year. I think that's why Thion said it. He wouldn't have if she still went here, I know for a fact. And this was the first time he was bringing it up again since it happened and he told me and the rest of the guys. He wasn't a huge fan of the guy but throwing it in his face that he slept with his ex while they were still together wasn't how Thion was. Unless he was pushed, like now. He's all for building ammo until it was necessary to crush someone.
We continued through the hallway, my hand patting Thion's back as the crowd got even more riled up at his last words. Some guys even fist-bumped him and patted his arm as they passed. But it was more in a way of him not backing down than anything else.
Thion shook his head as we went down the main staircase. "His dumbass," he said. "He's lucky I ain't drag his ass up outta that closet. How the fuck are you gonna come at me, try to embarrass me by insinuating I'm gay when you're sneaking around with all these lil boys? Come on now. Do better."
Of course, he was gay, and how Thion knew that, I had no clue. I chuckled before I could help it. Even when he was serious he found some way to sound funny. I tightened my grip on his shoulder.
"How'd you even know that?"
He grinned, looking over at me. "Might've caught him doing some suspicious shit over the years. Why'd you think I called him guppy?" He shrugged and we got to the first floor, maneuvering the crowd of kids. "When are these bitches gonna stop messing with me, Rich?"
That made me laugh loud enough that some kids turned to look at me.
"I really don't know." And I was serious. They all know not to mess with him and he's proving all of them wrong if they think teasing him like children is going to knock him off balance.
His next words were loud and addressed to everyone as his arms stretched out on either side of him and he looked around. "Just because I haven't knocked some teeth out this year and I'm being a good boy, don't mean I'm playing with y'all."
I shook my head and shoved him. "Stop being corny."
Making our way to the cafeteria, I was nervous. I shouldn't be but it was mostly my inner voice telling me Ari's going to say no. Again. That still shouldn't be an excuse because we're all asking them. I'm not asking just her so I shouldn't be nervous. She's not the only one that might say no.
"Can you chill?" I heard Sean say.
I didn't know he was talking to me until I felt their gazes. I turned to my friends. "What?"
They gave me a look.
"Calm down, bro," Heath said.
"I am calm," I lied. My hands tightened around the bouquet of flowers I held.
They all stared at me with the same expression before saying collectively, "Right," followed by scoffing.
I was about to defend my lie too before Nate cut me off with, "They're sitting outside for lunch, under the tree."
"Do we have to do this now?" I blurted.
Some of them laughed but it was Carlos who said, "Dude, prom's in a couple of weeks. There's no more time. If you knew you were- why didn't you ask her earlier then?"
"What?"
There were groans and I turned when I felt something on my head. Of course, it was Thion's hand. He gripped my hair.
I almost whine and punched him hard enough in the stomach that he grunted and dropped his hand. "Don't touch my hair! I'm tired of telling you people. This is why I cut it."
Thion recovered quickly, straightening but still rubbing his stomach. "I want to fight you," he gritted out.
"What the hell did I do?" I threw my hands up.
"What don't you do!" he exclaimed.
We'd long stopped in the middle of the hallway and they were all staring between me and Thion.
"You walk around acting like you don't want this girl and you do," he said in a tone that I couldn't argue with.
He's never really said it like that, and it shut me up. He used to point out that I liked her and that was easier to dismiss or get out of because I could easily turn it into something else. But him saying I want her, that only has one meaning behind it and added with his tone, I couldn't get out of it.
"You do," he added again bluntly. "I'm tired of this shit okay?" He laughed dryly. "Look I usually don't care what any of you wanna do," he said, looking at all of us now, "but when you start going crazy and do fuckshit like this guy," he pointed at me and all I could do was stare at him blankly, "I'm gonna have to step in. This right here," he gestured to me. "it isn't healthy. Don't do this."
Some of the guys discreetly tried to hide their smiles and cleared their throats, trying not to laugh.
Thion turned back to me again. "She is driving you crazy, Chris," he said slowly. "And she ain't doing shit than be herself. You can't hide it and you're still trying to act clueless when I visibly see you getting addicted to her."
I scoffed. "She's not some drug, T."
He eyed me. "You're not convincing me. I'm saying all this because we're all friends here." He held his hands up briefly, pinning me with a look. "You were one of the most laid-back guys in this groupâprobably number oneâthen you met her. I'm not saying she's a bad person, she isn't; but you keep denying your feelings for her and it's making this worse-"
"I really don't have to listen to this," I cut him off. A pressure was building in the back of my head and I knew my face was red. "I don't need you or anybody telling me what my feelings are for anyone. I don't need your therapy. And I don't need this."
I held out the flowers to him but when he just stared at me with that deadly calm, I shook my head and dropped it. I stepped around him. Or I tried to anyway.
I flinched at the coldness that pressed against the side of my face, pulling away and turning to glare at Thion.
His eyes widened unapologetically. "You're bruising."
"Of course, I'm fucking bruising, you put it there," I snapped back.
A throat cleared across from us. "Language. I'm sure you boys don't need more detention time than what you're already going to get."
Huffing, I turned back toward Mr. Howard. Our principal.
He sat across from us behind his desk with his hands resting lazily on the arms of his chair. He was an average-sized man, mid-forties I'd say, bald, and obviously hits the gym at least once a week. His beard was cut low, and the salt and pepper facial hair giving away his age because his appearance didn't.
His hand ran over his jaw as his brown eyes moved from me to Thion, trying to find a way to approach this situation. There were two folders in front of him on the desk and no doubt the one that's open is mine.
He had two fingers pressed against his temple, rubbing his russet-brown skin as he sighed at whatever nonsense Thion just said that I wasn't paying attention to.
I've never been in his officeâI never had to beâand I'm seconds away from hyperventilating then killing Thion because this is going to go on my record. I don't have nor want anything on my record!
Gritting my teeth, I jerked to my right then reached up to snatch the ice pack from Thion when he pressed it against my face again. "My hands work." I scowled at him but tossed the ice pack on the desk in front of me.
I leaned back in my chair, crossing my arms and staring at Principal Howard. He had the same expression on his face, but the slight amusement that was there wasn't hard to miss.
The worse part was they knew each other personally. Before this school year, Thion was taking regular trips to this office so much that they're pretty much brothers at this point. His anger issues are really no joke, but he's been a lot better. He told me he'd still been coming to see Howard throughout the year, more like a therapy-type thing to talk about his classes and whichever student's been trying him lately.
If it wasn't obvious, we fought. And I'm pissed. He's been sitting here all calm and unbothered while I'm barely stopping myself from attacking him. It was all a blur of fists and I remember feeling each hit, but all I could focus on was Ari.
Somewhere between me throwing my last punch and security parting the crowd, she'd been there. When teachers and security guards were the only things stopping us, I'd heard her shout.
"What the hell are you doing!"
We'd both, Thion and I, turned to see her standing in the spot where the security guards had cleared, looking pissed as hell. She was marching over too until a teacher stopped her, and they dragged us off to the nurse to get cleaned up before bringing us here. Since then I couldn't really think about much else. I could feel the swelling in my jaw, the ache in my stomach and multiple places on my face, and my back was starting to feel all wrong too, but all of that was muted.
I know she's probably worried and as much as I wanted to see her, I really couldn't face her right now.
"Hey," Thion whispered, draped over the arm of his chair and leaning toward me. I pursed my lips in annoyance. "You mad?"
Principal Howard dropped his head with a cough that did nothing to hide that he was trying not to laugh. I gave him a look.
"All right." Howard sat forward, clearing his throat to get professional. He places his linked hands on the desk, staring us down, his brown gaze unyielding. "Anyone want to tell me what happened."
Thion raised his hand after a moment of silence. I still didn't look at him. "I started it," he said.
Howard gestured to him, the rings on his fingers glinting off the white lights. "And why's that?"
"He was pissing me off," Thion said simply. "So technically, he started it."
I kept my eyes forward and addressed our principal. "He got mad at me because in his twisted brain," I paused when Thion made a protesting sound but continued anyway, "he wants to tell me what I feel for a girl and get mad because I don't see it."
Howards eyebrows raised and he turned his gaze to Thion.
"Nah, nah, nah, don't give me that look," he said, moving to the edge of his seat. "This boy does everything under the sun to try and get Ari's attention. He almost pisses himself whenever he has to ask her to go out with us, he struggles not to be physically close to her, snaps her like twenty times a day." He pushed himself even closer to the edge of his chair. "And look, he buys her breakfast every morning- I can sit here for the rest of the day and tell you everything he does for her that he doesn't do for the rest of our girls not nearly half as much. So yeah, I got pissed cause he's been doing this for too-"
"What the hell do you want me to do, man?" I cut him off hardly.
He turned to me, meeting my glare and I got a good look at his face. The left side of his lips were swollen and there was a split on the bottom one. In the time that we'd went to the nurse and came here, the cut on the edge of his eyebrow, covered by a thin Band-Aid, was just as swollen. A dark red bruise surrounded by a deep violet color was below his left eye and getting even more swollen every time I glimpsed it, and the same thing went for the one on his other cheek that was bigger. Basically, both of us aren't going to be looking so hot tomorrow. And even with all of that, he didn't give the slightest hint that he was uncomfortable.
"Admit it," he said slowly, not breaking our gaze. "Stop acting like this. You are going crazy."
I laughed humorlessly.
"Look at yourself bro." His voice raised with his next words. "You out here losing your mind if she's not talking to you and calling her a hoe if she talks to other guys-"
"I didn't call her that!" I exclaimed. But he just gave me a look that I didn't argue with.
"You don't have to reassure me, that's not why I'm doing this, Rich." He shook his head. "I know you haven't admitted it to yourself and it's messing you up. I just don't like seeing you like this. And I've never seen you like this. Not even with Danni. I'm just looking out for you that's all and you've been pushing me more and more toward a blackout."
I looked away, dropping my eyes to my bruised fists.
"I can't do that," I said lowly, letting my mind wander there. To my feelings for her. I stopped before I could go any further. "I can't do it."
"I'm not saying you should act on it." I saw him twist more toward me, but I still didn't look at him, just pressed at my knuckles until they stung. Just to feel something else. "Just admit it to yourself. Stop trying so hard to not feel anything, cause it makes it worse."
I shook my head before turning my head to him. "It's not like I'm scared of what... I might-" he cleared his throat loudly and I rolled my eyes. "What I do feel... for her," I corrected, and he hummed. "It'll just make it harder for the both of us when I leave, that's all."
It felt like breathing again after being underwater for a minute. My shoulders relaxed and even if I was still pissed at him, a calmness fell over me and tension I hadn't felt before left my body. All at once, memories of her flashed through my head; her laughing, smiling, crying, and everything all of those made me feel. I knew there was no going back after saying all this out loud and finally accepting it, but I decided to take Thion's advice.
"It's just a year." He chuckled, a hand dropping to my shoulder. I didn't know that part of my body hurt until he did that, and I flinched. "My bad." He moved his hand. "But look at it this way- it's one year where you can come visit whenever you want, and she can come visit you. It'll fly by, then y'all gon be going to the same college. Happy ever after," he finished and sat back.
My lips twitched at the thought and I turned to him, smiling. "I like how you already know she's getting in."
He pursed his lips, giving me a look. "With your mom mentoring her? She's getting in."
I agreed to that but bit the inside of my cheek to stop from chuckling. "True."
"Are we good?" he asked, tilting his head.
I made a show of thinking about it then nodded. "Yeah, we cool." We did our handshake briefly and I smiled at his grin.
"Perfect!" There was a clap and Thion and I turned forward again.
"Shit, you still here?" Thion retorted and we both fell into a round of snickering.
"Funny," Howard said dryly, but it was obvious he was glad that the hard part was over. "But now we have to lay down your punishment, boys, so get comfortable."
"Cool, but I need to talk to you about these kids you've got in this school here."