it is time, gays and token straights. the chapter i have been teasing for like 2 months
TWENTY
The Moon Controls The Tides (1/2)
The drive to the hotel was easily the most boring thing.
Just driving for an hour with no music was painful. He was pretty sure getting an AUX put in wasn't worth it, but that didn't mean it wasn't irritating to hear genres he hated, including radio talk.
Time passed by slow, but he eventually made it, and the others showed up only a few minutes after him. Marco spotted his car immediately and made his way over, staring at him through the driver window like a creep. Elias could only frown at him.
"You came!" Marco proclaimed when Elias pushed the car door open, backing up a bit.
"Yeah, I never said I wouldn't," Elias commented, shutting the door and hitting the lock button three times for his own sake. The breeze hit him as soon as he stepped out. "Oh. It's not super humid."
"Nope," Marco responded, then started walking ahead.
Elias glanced to the side and spotted Roman, offering a soft smile and falling back to walk alongside him. "Did you drive here on your own?"
Roman nodded. "I don't like Marco's music taste."
Elias chuckled. "That's fair. You could've come with me, you know. If you wanted to."
"Maybe next time," Roman suggested quietly. Elias glanced at him as they walked into the building. He held the door open for him, and Roman made a very awkward gesture of casting a look, then quickly looking away. Elias couldn't tell if he thanked him or not. He was so quiet.
Once again, he seemed nervous. Elias took his place back beside him. Was he nervous because of sharing a room? If that was the case, Elias wouldn't have minded if he wanted to get separate ones. It was no issue at all. Elias wondered why he asked if he was comfortable when Roman looked so stiff.
Elias didn't say anything though. He trusted Roman to speak up if he wanted to change anything.
"Keys," Felix said, turning around to hand them cards after he and Marco checked everyone in. Elias took his with a mumbled thanks.
"All in the same area," Marco told them as they headed to the elevator. They were barely able to fit all six of them in that one box. "So not too far away."
Elias jerked a little when the elevator started its way up, apologizing to Roman when he accidentally stumbled into his side. His legs felt uncomfortable from sitting in one position for so long. Roman didn't respond verbally; he just shrugged.
Marco started talking about their plans as they went from the elevator to the hallways to find their rooms. Gambling the first night â Elias was absolutely not going. Neither was Roman. Poor Felix was having to babysit three manchildren.
"Should we go do something together?" Elias asked as he stopped in front of their door. He slipped the key out from his pocket. "Or do you usually stay in on the first nights?"
"Uh â " Roman shrugged, again. "I don't really mind."
"So indecisive," Elias laughed, pushing the door open. "It's okay though. We can work on th â " His words died on his tongue immediately. He walked fully in to make sure he wasn't seeing things.
Roman immediately started his rambling, his instinct when he was panicking, Elias was coming to notice. "I swear I didn't know there was just one bed. Maybe there was a mistake? Marco probably made a mistake. We can â we can go ask for a change? I'll go talk to Marco right now â "
"It's fine," Elias said firmly, taking hold of his arm to keep him from running out with his tail tucked between his legs. "I'm okay with it if you are. Sorry, I just really don't wanna go through all that trouble. But if you're uncomfortable, we can ask for a switch."
"Um..." Roman trailed off, and his tan cheeks were tinged red. Elias wondered how someone so big and intimidating could be so sweet. "I-I'm fine with it, too. Uh â we can just put pillows? In the middle?"
"Okay. That works."
As Elias went to go set his things down, Roman started his apologizing habit. "I'm really so sorry. I don't know if it was an accident or Marco being an asshole, but either way, I'm really sorry. I know it's probably weird."
Elias sighed. "Roman," he stated, making him shut up before he could apologize again. "I told you it's okay. I would never force myself into a situation that made me uneasy. I trust you. I feel comfortable with you. Alright?"
Roman nodded quickly. Elias had an urge to hold his face in his hands â wanted to see if his skin felt as warm as it looked.
Elias gave him a soft smile. "You really are so cute. Stop worrying so much. Now, answer my question from before â you wanna go out or stay in? You have to choose one."
"Whatever you want."
"That's not an answer."
"Yeah, it is," Roman replied, frowning. "Whatever you want is gonna be either going out or staying in. So, I did choose."
Elias scoffed. "Okay, smartass."
Roman smiled a little. Elias couldn't help but feel warm at the sight â he didn't see it much. And it was nice to know he seemed to enjoy Elias' company as much as he enjoyed his.
"We're going out, then," Elias stated. "After we settle in. Are you hungry?"
"Yeah, kinda."
"Okay. Any preferences?"
"Not really. You?"
"Seafood." Roman's expression immediately shifted into one of pure despair. Elias laughed, kneeling on the mattress. "Did you forget I hate it, too? Relax."
Roman tossed one of his shirts at him, right in his face, only making Elias laugh louder. "I hate you," Roman mumbled.
"Oh, really?"
"Yeah."
"That's such a shame. Because I like you. You're really gonna hurt my feelings like that?" Elias tilted his head, watching Roman put his clothes in drawers, looking like he was sulking. Elias had an urge to hug him; he wasn't sure why.
Roman paused. "Is it okay if I take a shower before we go?"
Elias blinked, playfulness fading. "Go ahead. Hey â did the joke upset you?"
"No, no," Roman replied, shaking his head. "That'd be dumb to get upset over that. I'm just gonna shower now because I might forget to later."
Elias nodded, sitting down on the bed and crossing his legs. "Yeah, go. No rush."
As Roman left to go do that, Elias laid down and checked his phone. He had one text from Mars waiting, and it was a picture most likely taken by one of Lily's moms. Mars was at the beach â maybe that was what Elias and Roman could do after they ate.
dad (-: -
Cute (: I'm glad you're having fun
He put his phone face down on his chest, then threw his arm over his eyes. He felt a little tired. Not bad enough to where he couldn't go out, but enough to make him close his eyes for a little bit.
Okay, so maybe a lot a bit.
He had fallen asleep without meaning to. And when he woke up, it was due to his own brain telling him to get his ass up. When he opened his eyes, he looked to the window, and there was a lack of sunlight streaming in past the curtains. Instead, it was dark. Or getting really close to it.
Elias sat up immediately. He spotted Roman sitting at the circular table in the corner of the room. "Why didn't you wake me up?" Elias asked him, wincing at the weird hoarseness of his voice that sometimes came with naps.
Roman put his phone down. "Uh, you looked tired. I didn't wanna bother you."
Elias blinked slowly. He furrowed his brows. "What time is it?"
"Almost eight."
"I slept for five hours," Elias whispered in disbelief. "Please tell me you ate."
Roman's silence was an answer in itself.
"Oh, you big idiot. I'm gonna shower, get dressed, then we're going, alright? Look up what's around us and choose what you like most."
"Uh, but you â "
"No buts. I'm fine with anything. And I feel bad for falling asleep like that. You choose."
Roman just sighed.
Elias did what he said he would, and when he came out fully dressed and rubbing a towel into his hair, Roman perked up. "Did you find something?" Elias asked, sitting down on the end of the bed.
"Uh, yeah, I think so. Also â not trying to be rude, but â you're like, really bossy when you wake up."
Elias blinked. "Huh?"
"I mean, I don't know for sure yet obviously. But you kinda â uh, you're snappy."
"Oh." Elias went through his interaction with Roman earlier, and the ones he had at the diner with the group. Not only was he not a morning person, but that seemed to extend to naps as well. "Sorry. I have a solution: don't talk to me until an hour after I wake up."
When Roman stared at him like he was thinking very, very deeply about what he said, Elias told him: "That was a joke."
"Oh. Oh, okay."
Elias cracked an amused smile. "You ready? Let's go."
They decided to walk since it was nearby. And the weather was nice, so it wasn't a hassle. Roman was quiet. He always was â but Elias wanted him to talk more. Partially because he really liked his voice, and partially because Elias liked having conversations with him. They were never not interesting.
Elias gently nudged his elbow against Roman's arm. "You alright with going down to the beach after? I haven't been to one in a while."
Roman nodded. Elias glanced at him as they walked. The breeze was ruffling his hair, the color looking much darker under the night sky. The street lamps highlighted parts of his face when they walked under them, and his eyes became this honey brown for a quick few seconds that Elias found pretty. He was staring straight ahead, had been the entire time so far, but he looked to the side at one point, catching Elias' gaze.
Elias perked up. "I was staring, sorry."
"Um, it's okay," Roman mumbled, pressing his knuckles against his cheek, obscuring Elias' view of the bump on the bridge of his nose and the way it almost hooked at the end. "I was about to st â never mind."
Elias raised an eyebrow. "You backtrack a lot. Just say it. Nothing you say will be embarrassing with me."
Roman looked at him again. Had that beauty mark under his eyebrow always been there? "I, uh â was gonna say I was about to stare at you, too."
"Now how would that be awkward to say?" Elias teased. "You caught me looking at you already. I'm not embarrassed. You could tell me anything and I wouldn't bat an eye."
"Do you mean that?"
Elias slowed when Roman came to a stop. He turned around to face him, brows furrowed. "Why are you asking? Yes, I mean it."
"If â If I told you something, it wouldn't change anything?"
"As long as you didn't commit a terrible crime, yes."
Roman smiled weakly at that, a puff of air escaping his nose in the form of a quiet laugh. "I didn't commit a crime, don't worry. Feels like I did though."
Elias frowned, then took his arm and moved them out of the way of the few passersby that came around. "What's wrong? You can tell me. No judgment whatsoever."
"It wouldn't change anything, right?"
"You already asked me that. It wouldn't change a thing, Roman. I promise."
Roman swallowed tightly. He seemed more nervous than Elias had ever seen him. "Because... it's something I keep thinking about. And I feel like I'll explode â if I don't say it."
Elias touched his arm. "You're kinda worrying me here. Are you dying or something?"
Roman did that nose laugh again. He facepalmed, shaking his head. Elias felt like he was in a video game where he just got a new achievement: "Achievement Unlocked! New Roman Expression."
"No, I'm not dying."
"Thank God."
"Um..." Roman trailed off, rubbing the side of his neck. He was avoiding eye contact. "I-I can't even say it."
Elias gave him a sympathetic look. "If I turn around, would that help?"
"I don't know."
"Let's try it. Turning around." Elias showed his back to him and listened expectantly, eyes trained on the birds perched on power lines. "I'll only turn once you tell me to."
Roman groaned, and it sounded muffled, as if he did it behind his hands. "Fuck it. Fine. God, I feel like a teenager again. Uh â I... I think â no, no, I know. Um, I really really like â "
They both startled at the sound of Elias' phone ringing. His head was spinning as he reached for it. Was he about to say what I think he was going to say? Elias stared down at the screen. It was that stupid unknown number. Again.
"Sorry," Roman whispered. "You can take that."
Elias turned to face him. "No, it's fine, it's just a random number that keeps calling me. Spam, probably."
Roman was looking down at his hands, pinching his his index between his other fingers, twisting his hands this way and that, rings being pushed up and down. Elias watched him silently for a few moments.
He wasn't quite sure how to respond. Roman liked him. There was no way you could interpret that any differently. And now things were making a lot more sense. The blushing, the nervousness, the constant kindness and worry, that whole talk a few months ago about the person he was interested in.
It was him he was talking about, wasn't it?
Did Elias like him, too? Did he feel the same way he felt?
All he knew was that Roman was someone he felt safe and comfortable with. He liked his company, his personality, his little quirks and habits he started to notice over the months of knowing him and seeing him almost every day of the week. He never got tired of it either.
Elias wasn't sure. He compared his interactions with him to the ones with his other friends. He definitely treated Roman differently. But was it because he liked him romantically, or did he see him as more of a best friend? How exactly were you able to distinguish between the two? He'd always had a little trouble with that.
Elias stared some more. Could he imagine kissing him? Dating him? Doing romantic things with him? He tilted his head absently. He looked at his lips â he was biting at them, one of his nervous habits. Elias had the urge he always had to press his thumb down and separate his teeth and his bottom lip.
He never had these weird urges with anyone else, now that he thought about it.
"You're really quiet," Roman whispered, voice sounding wobbly. "Can â Can you say something? You don't even have to respond. You could â uh, you could say we should go eat already. I'm hungry, too."
"How do you know you like me?"
Roman blanched. "What?"
"I'm not invalidating you. I'm asking because I can't tell if what I feel for you is the same as what you feel for me or something else entirely."
Roman was silent for a couple moments. Until, "I just... like you. I-I don't know. I just â whenever I'm around you, I get this light feeling. I feel happy. I smile more, talk more. I always want to be around you. I always admire you â you're unfairly attractive. S-Sometimes I even just... find myself wondering what it would be like to, uh, kiss you. And you make me less nervous when it comes to speaking. You... You're so comforting to me, you know. It's impossible not to have feelings for you."
Elias was happy around him. He smiled more around him, talked more, teased more. He looked at him a lot â his eyes, his nose, his face and body. He felt at ease around him. He felt his worries lessen when he was around him.
He looked at his lips. He imagined reaching forward, taking his face in his hands and pressing their mouths together. The image brought heat to his face.
"I-I don't know how to respond. I don't mean that in a rejecting sort of way, or in a rude way. I'm just... trying to sort out my own feelings."
"I'm not asking you to like me back or say whether you feel the same or not," Roman quickly said. "I just... wanted â needed, to tell you. If â If you wanna switch rooms now, I completely get it."
Elias gave him a fond smile. "Idiot. I already told you nothing would change, didn't I? I promised."
"Yeah..."
Elias held out his pinky, shook it in front of him. "I never break my promises, Roman. And I don't lie either. I'll have an answer for you, because I know secretly you want one."
Roman sighed, hooked their pinkies together. He looked embarrassed again.
"Don't act all weird with me now," Elias mused. "Like I said â nothing to be embarrassed about. You don't have to worry about anything when you're with me, okay?"
Roman inhaled shakily. "Okay."
___
A/N: time to not upload on wattpad for two months
jk
kind of
also this was 3k words but it doesn't feel like it for some reason