Chapter 21: Chapter 21

"Oof!"

Katrina rushed by my side. "Are you okay?"

"What do you think? I tripped when nothing was on the floor. This is hopeless!"

She shook her head slightly and helped me up, holding me still as I stumbled in the heels I had on. "I shouldn't have brought you my sister's clothes."

I looked down, eying the color. "It's fine, but...why red?"

"She was watching Pretty Woman – and tried out prostitution. But it didn't last, probably only an hour before she figured out what prostitution was. She thought the color red was...I don't know, eye popping I guess." She smirked, but only wound up wincing at the memory.

I let out a small smile, brushing off the jeans that obviously didn't fit me, since they were tighter than I desired. If I didn't know any better, I would have said my legs were cut off from blood circulation.

"So, you know what to do right?"

I nodded slowly. "When I see him...uh...I jump on him?"

Katrina sighed. "Kind of, without the 'I'm a psycho' stuff. You throw yourself at him. Say you love him if it helps."

My eyes widened.

"Okay, okay. Don't say that, just...say he looks hot – or...say, his eyes shine brighter than the ocean."

I scoffed. "That is the most cheesiest line I've ever heard. How many times have you used it?"

She looked around awkwardly. "A couple of times...now go! He'll be here any minute. I have to start off to class, tell me what happens later!"

Nodding once, I walked down the hall, holding onto the locker for support, and hearing Katrina's small steps as she rushed away.

She told me if I wanted to go through with this look, I had to be put on a show and act like a promiscuous girl whose done the 'deed'. Whatever the hell that meant. But so far, I hated being like this – and to add to that, I hated dressing like this.

This wasn't me.

I almost fell forward again, but clasped my hand around a lock and held myself up.

Smooth – very smooth.

I stood up straight, and tried to find the end of the heel that made me keep balance on the ground.

Were there training wheels for this?

I stuck my head out from around the corner of the hallway; nearly annoyed to death that Jesse hadn't shown up yet. Heaving a sigh, I started thinking repeatedly that this wasn't a good idea.

Other than the result I expected, there was still a chance that he wouldn't even care. But what I was worried about was that, what if he jumped on me instead?

The sound of giggling erupted from the hall, turning, I saw a couple. They obviously just stopped against the lockers, not having heard Katrina and I – and my fall that potentially sprained my ankle.

"...Right now?" I barely caught in on the hushed conversation they were having, though his voice croaked as the girl ran her hand down his shirt, and then back up.

This is getting ridiculous; don't these girls have any morals, at all?

She looked up, gazing into his eyes with a look I've never seen before – it was almost challenging, tempting, yet admiring at the same time. "Yes."

I blinked.

And barely saw her being pushed into the janitor's closet with him.

That's what this was? Staring after them, I suddenly had no doubts that Jesse would do that. But then again, maybe there was chance that he wouldn't. But what if he did? Was I ready for that? Could I pull that off?

While shaking my head, my eyes started to dart around in terror and uncertainty.

I can't do this. I can't.

I stumbled in the heels, and turned around in a rush.

What are you doing? Don't you want him to leave you alone? If you walk away, he'll just keep bothering you. Don't be a coward.

Vacillating at the corner of the hallway, I started to wonder if being pushed inside a closet was worth the trouble. But then I started to really think, if this outfit didn't pull off what I intended it to do, and only gave him more of a motive to keep bothering me – I'd have no other choice but to try to ignore him.

Though I had my qualms about that, judging mostly on the few days that already passed.

But anything, especially dressing as if I had no care in the world what everyone thought of me, would work at this point.

I held the lockers beside me for support as I turned back around and made my way back, and peered out of the corner just in time to see him opening his locker.

Closing my eyes, I leaned back against the corner of the hall and debated on just walking away or going through with this.

Was it worth it? Odds in one he won't buy a second of my act – but still, was it worth it?

I opened my eyes, blinking them a few times, and turned toward Jesse. I shook my ankle before I walked forward, begging to God that I didn't fall again. As the heel clicked against the tile floor, I tried my best not to make a face at the madly annoying sound. I walked out from the shadows, and I saw him.

Now, I'd be lying if I said he was dressed like a God – only because that would be a complete understatement. A low cut white t-shirt was covered by a loose and casual fitting black blazer, with dark jeans to add at that. After realizing I stared too long, I shifted my gaze to his face, watching with eyes like the girl I saw before. Admiration, though I dimmed it – not wanting to look like I just won the lottery.

I swallowed the lump in my throat. "Hi, Jesse."

Almost as if he were extremely bored, he side glanced at me, uninterested at all, and turned back to his locker. And then in a second, he completely froze, and turned his whole head my way.

I had to hide the frustrated and annoyed expression as he took in the outfit, eying the heels, mesmerizing every stitch of the pants, and staring at how low my shirt was.

What did you get yourself into?

Once he took in the outfit, he stared at my legs the longest, eventually trailing the gaze up past my hips and waist – and then just stopped altogether at a certain area on my blouse.

Ugh...

"C...C-Carson?" His lips shook, and he seemed to hesitate wildly when he looked up at my face. "What happened to you?"

That was my cue.

I smiled, remembering the expression the other girls had when they were around him, and walked with one foot in front of the other just like I had been taught in kindergarten. I let my arm extend outwards, brushing against the metal of the lockers – letting the locks clash together as I passed.

"I thought this would better suit my lifestyle." I said, lying through my teeth. There would never be any time in my life where I wore this kind of clothing again. I had to admit, trying heels for the first time for Jesse was sort of a let down – since my shoes seemed to be the last thing he had any desire in staring at right now.

He gazed at me with wide eyes as I found my way in front of him.

"And...what would that be?" I had to say, I was a little surprised that his voice broke when he talked. I didn't know if it was in my favor or his, all I knew was that I was making him nervous – something I never would have dreamt about.

Recalling the girl a while ago, I raised my hand to his shirt and pushed aside the collar of his blazer, letting my fingers trail softly down.

"Getting your attention," I whispered, and flashed my eyes up to meet his. I was going to leave it at that, but my next words found they're way to being voiced by themselves. "More of it."

His eyes seemed to darken, and he developed the strangest expression. It almost seemed as if he saw a ghost. In a daze, I kept trailing my hand down, and then raised it back up until I had the collar of his shirt again.

His sigh quivered when I let one of my fingers touch the skin at his neck. And I had to fight the rewarding smile that wanted to take precedence at the sound. "I uh...I have to go."

I pulled my hand back, faking a bewildered expression. He grabbed his stuff and shut his locker in a rush, bypassing me and disappearing around the corner of the hall.

I grinned, raising my fist up and bringing it down in a victory gesture. "Yes—!"

I would have said it properly, if I hadn't lost my footing on the heels and fell over. I barely had enough to time to hold onto the lockers before I fell completely.

Glancing around awkwardly, I brushed off my jeans and smiled as I followed after Jesse to class.

While even in the class, all he did was meet my eyes for a second and look away – but I was confused the entire time, because I couldn't read his expression, due mostly because he wouldn't stare at me long enough to see it.

Afterwards, he didn't make it any better. Reminding me of myself when I used to run away from him, he swiftly walked out of the class without a word.

I bit my lip, fighting a smile, and ignored the patronizing stares from my fellow classmates as I walked out.

~*~

I sighed. "I'm not wearing those again. They're death disguised as a shoe."

Katrina laughed, holding one of death traps in her hand. "I didn't know they weren't broken in."

I glanced at her. "What does that mean?"

"My sister had them on for only...minutes. They're like brand new; it's a miracle you aren't in a wheelchair yet. I mean, look at the size of these things!"

My gaze shifted to the heels dangling off of her finger, and I grimaced at the sight.

"I should have worn boots."

"I'll remember that next time."

I gave her a double take. "Next time? Isn't this enough, I mean, he ran away like a little girl already. Might as well not push it."

She set her stuff down completely on the picnic table, and moved around so that she was sitting on the bench closest to me. "Whose to stop him from making sure you're not pulling a fast one on him? It's not everyday a girl gets a makeover and hits on the guy she hates."

I didn't know whether to feel relieved that she said I hated him, or mad that she said it at all. Either way, I was even more angered at the chance of wearing those stupid shoes again. At the thought, I glanced down, letting my toes glide across the cold grass.

"Give it a week or two – and hey, if you're lucky, he'll just never talk to you again after today. I doubt it though, since you said he's bionic – what you're wearing is something he sees everyday," she said, and then looked back up. "Or maybe we're taking this too far, and you really don't hate him as much as you used to."

I shot her a warning look, uninterested in pushing the subject further than that, and directed my childish glares elsewhere.

But this was Katrina. Her talent was to ask questions, lots of them.

"Carson?"

Just swallow your damn pride already.

"I don't hate him," I muttered.

Before she could comment, I glanced at her and continued.

"But what would you think? Out of nowhere he talks to me, tells me I'm hot when I ruined his dad's car, and then he made up this huge plan to catch me looking jealous. I like him, sure, but not the same way he does. I tried telling him I don't like him like that, and it's like talking to a rock – making him run away from me is the only thing that'll work."

"I'm getting the feeling that you don't even want him to leave you alone."

I almost flinched. "If him and me can't be friends, why talk to each other at all?"

After a moment of stillness, she shrugged in agreement, and let her eyes direct back to the school. "Uh oh."

"What now?"

An amused expression crossed her face. "Playboy, six o' clock."

I tried to remember what that meant, and when I did, I glanced behind me. Walking up to us was a boy – cropped sandy brown hair, eyes I couldn't see, and a small smile on his lips.

I thought for a second that this was my calling. A boy who was finally going to talk to me, who wasn't going to torture me with grueling comments, and tell me he loved me because he wanted to, and not because he planned on taking me to his house – but then the moment shattered.

I was wearing my whore outfit.

Great.

"Carson, right?" He half-smiled, and I watched as the light glinted on his eyes. Somehow I felt drawn away from him because they weren't the same color as Jesse's.

Because in all honesty, I've never known a guy longer than I do Jesse. I would have said I was a repellent to most boys, but now I know it was only how I appeared to them.

"Yes. Are you are?"  I forgot to keep up my act, and let my attitude slip back into being a jerk. I couldn't help it.

My tone didn't seem to faze him though, since he remained smiling at me. "Kale. I used to be one of your brother's friends."

In all honesty, I still had no idea who he was. Darren had a lot of friends.

"Sorry, I don't remember. But you know what? I'll tell Darren you said hi, alright?" In desperation, I grabbed my bag, snatched the heels from Katrina, and pulled her with me as I ran off.

When it was safe enough to start walking, I leaned on Katrina for support as I struggled to put the heels back on. I saw she glanced behind us, smiling wide. "You didn't like him? Look at him – he's gorgeous."

"No."

I slowed down once we were close to the building of the school. In the back of my head, I had to remind myself that if I stayed a safe distance away from the other guy's here, then I wouldn't have any problems. So far, staying out in the open wasn't such a good idea – especially outside during our lunch hour.

"What? Are you crazy? Why not?"

I shot her a look.

"Because," I gestured to my outfit: the painful red heels, the tight dark jeans, the revealing scarlet blouse, and my fixed up hair. "If dressing like this, is what it takes to get his attention – then in reality, he's not worth it."