Alex
Nobody died.
I wasted three hours of my life.
Just like the way I wasted the past few weeks, months. Many more.
Glumly I pressed the big red round button on the remote as the screen goes blank as it shut downs completely in a blink. A zombie movie in which no one died? What kind of a cinematic experience is that?
"Hey Edmund" I holler turning to look at him through my shoulder, one of my arms casually placed upon the head rest of the couch "The movie sucked, it's a big flop. Hope your father hasn't invested much money on it"
The human I was trying to converse with ever so slowly turned his broad giantly clothed back from the kitchen and raised a brow at me.
I smirk, as I shrugged.
"Not that I care" at that his shoulder relaxes his posture screamed as expected from a typical you.
Damn. The upgraded level of savageness that flows through me.
"You have seen this thing three times since morning, what's the deal?" I lazily tilt my head back to Lee. For some hideous reason he maintained a fat grin while he enquired. This boy right here was a perfect subject for commercials on healthy teeth and gums. He could receive a kick on his sensitive member and yet scream all while smiling like a pennywise.
The guy sure can handle horror with happiness.
"Professionally gathering the negatives so I could piss him off" I say lazily as I watch his eyes lit up, like a puppy.
Since the day I began answering him without making him regret asking me a question. He had been questioning me a lot.
I wanted to stay humbly quiet the time when he first asked me when his facial hairs would be mature enough to grow, I don't even know what promoted him to ask me that since he practically trembled while he spoke.
Since staying quiet was rude, I gingerly had opened my mouth and blurted a fuck off.
It was in seventh grade.
He never showed me his face for a year.
I was glad.
But then I saw him cry, literally wail with his nose running like a leaking tap. It was because he got chicken pox right before his eight grade finals. It was Edmund I was looking for, I found him instead in his room.
The sight disgusted me so I offered a stack of tissues.
He thanked me as he blew his nose with a grin. That confused me, so I asked him why he was smiling like a lunatic?
The answer quite perked my interest.
"I am happy because my plan worked" he sobbed " I hugged a girl infested with pox, it worked. I knew it would. I would've failed if I had attended" squealing he jumped as I stumbled a step back. Immediately I retreated two steps away and with my dead clutch on the door frame I watched him horrified as he began inspecting the bumps.
Then I whispered to myself.
"I need to- I must save Edmund from this- whatever this is"
But I couldn't. They were far deep in the sea of friendship for my fishing cord to pull him out from this mess.
Edmund laughed it off, that was fine.
Then he began to make him hang out with us. That was not.
Then it was him suggesting we go camping. It became ridiculous.
He was the one person who, as pathetic it was to admit. He scared me.
Lee was unpredictable, he was crazy. I hated clowns, and he was a good looking clown. He drove cars at the speed limit that was unhealthy. It made me nauseous, it made Edmund smile.
And one day, he made me smile as well. I don't know or remember when it happened. He had his teeth extracted and his face was swollen up like lopsided balloon. His misery made me happy, as cruel as it sounded. That's how I began to talk with him. Just because he couldn't that day. It was torture for him not to be able to reply when he had been waiting years to talk with me.
And till today, it was just as weird. Our friendship.
"Edmund doesn't seem to care though. He is brushing off your criticism Alex" he nods, appreciative of his own observation.
"Are you both done bitching behind my back? Literally" Edmunds voice resounded the walls of his new York condo apartment. Silencing the ungrateful residentials. Us.
"You have big back" Lee mused as Edmund again raised his brows, now directed towards a narrow eyed lee. And then a smug look crosses Ed's features.
"yes I do have a big shoulder you Lilliputs, not only that" he then lowers his gaze, his lips twisting, displeased. we look down upon ourselves to see as he traded his gaze between the jeans zippers of Lee and I, then we both snapped our head in his direction as we realized it was our crotch he was looking at "My body also supports big-bigger than yours kind of big dick" he mouths us the last part as we both frown, offended visually.
"Big what?"
At the sound of such question accompanied by the feminine voice of Hailey a soft silence falls upon us.
And then, it gets lifted off by Lee. Slowly, tauntingly. And for me, interestingly.
"Oh, nothing" Lee smirks, throwing a wiggle of brow at a tongue tied Ed as I stifle a smile slumping more. "Edmund was just informing us how big his-"
"Ego is" and that's how you lose a girl Edmund. And what followed next assured me that he could confidently direct a movie on above given name and make it work. He was that terrible. "My ego" he smiled stiffly tipping his head, his cheeks oddly flushed with innocence as if he was just not in the quest to boast about his masculinity to two of his friends on lean side. "I have a big ego when it comes to believing in the films that my father makes. For instance Alex just had been praising one of them. Weren't you Alex?"
I mouth it was terrible as he softly glares.
Hailey and Ed began dating a week ago, I wasn't interested in how it all started, but I was entirely focused on how it'll proceed. The one good reason why I was entertaining myself with this on going chick lit romance was-
Edmund sucked.
Even Lee could do better than him. And since it was Hailey who was an abstract version of me, it was fun to see the six feet something guy squirm under her gaze. Since he never took the chance with me no matter how awfully explosive I was.
"Where are you both off to?" wheeling the conversation Edmund shuffles out of the kitchen as Clarissa joins Hailey. All dressed up and ready to leave. Edmund hugs Hailey from side as she smiles craning her neck, a little more and she can sprain it.
But to my dismay he leans and kisses her.
Lee rolls his eyes and I slouch more, sighing.
"The ball Ed, we have an appointment with stylist" Clarissa grumbles as she crouches down to zip her boots.
At that Lee and Edmund snapped their head to watch each other, baffled if I precise. Then both them simultaneously read down the time on their wrist watch and then at me. Perplexed I blink slowly. And just felt next.
I feel it, as Lee stumbles to ground and grab my legs and Edmund's hands snake down under my arm pit. Too perplexed I sit steady as I get levitated. Warily I feel my shoulders squeeze my cheeks as they carry me grunting.
And that's when I leisurely opened my mouth to speak my doubts out.
"Why am I being treated as human hammock?" I frown pouting, looking left and right as they gave me free carry on ride.
They don't answer me, I wiggle my brows at Hailey who blinks at me rather amused.
"Want to help a man in need? I am being manhandled here" hopefully I offer Clarissa and Hailey as they eyed me for a second more before turning to leave.
Ofcourse they tolerate me because they are friends with Ed. No one ever comes near me willingly.
I mentally make a note to never give Hailey any relationship advice. I won't even reveal her that his boyfriend wanted me to kiss him one fine day and call myself gay.
That rhymed so good.
"I haven't showered since three days Ed" I say bored now, the rhythmic momentum of them carrying me now a lame motion I was becoming accustomed to. Just how big was this home?.
Well, not bigger than mine. I smirk as I was soon discarded by the floor. Just like that. Not on my feet. On floor.
And it was my bathroom.
I got up crawling and stumbling, dusting the sweat pants, feeling a bit dizzy as the blood rushed to my head. Edmund strides to the sink and washes his hand.
"I told you I hadn't showered in-"
"I got it okay" he barks, suddenly facing me angrily. Lee stood just a step behind him. His features much softer and relaxed than Ed.
"Okay" I whisper nodding. He then hastily removes the baseball cap from my head, the absence of black covering causes my undyed hairs to stick up in a manner that even a drenched ginger cat would be ashamed of such color and mess.
"Now strip and get into shower" he strains his voice, as if controlling his emotions. But I could register only one of his concerned attempt towards me.
"Woah" I pat his shoulder "Too desperate dude. I am not-"
"We have three hours before the ball begins" he takes an intimidating step towards me as I scowl, looking up at him. Even standing with my tip toes strained to make his height â less daunting, "And we need to sober you up till that"
I go back to my original height as his words sluggishly hits me, I was good at hiding it but how?
And soon Lee gives me the answer to my unvoiced thoughts, sophisticatedly from behind.
"Edmund keeps count of the drinks in cabinet" I stare at them both retreating a futile hideous step back as I switch my gaze to Edmund as it was him who continued
"And it just so happens that a few of them has been missing since morning"
I grit my teeth, as my back feels the sturdy smooth texture of shower glass.
"I am not drunk" I whisper closing my eyes.
"Stop fooling yourself" Is what I hear him say, they had been soft, they had been supportive. I was surviving because of them. But then it were times like these. They had to do what they had to.
"Will she hate me? If she sees me like this" I question naively, they don't answer. Because they know I won't believe them. "I tried not to drink but-" I then began choking on my words as I felt someone hug me. I don't open my eyes as Edmund pushes me inside.
Before I could speak I felt the warmth leave me as heavy sprays of cold water began to hit me. The force blurring and burning my vision. But clearing my head.
Drenching and drowning a boy who was drunk but not drunk enough,
and vaguely sober to not be genuinely sober enough.
***