Mallory
I sat at my vanity, nervously chewing on my fingernail and agonising over necklace options. The wrong choice could wreck my outfit. I loved making Reid's jaw drop when he saw me looking good, and jewellery options were no laughing matter.
I could almost imagine my boyfriend, if I closed my eyes. Leaning over my chair, his chin just above my shoulder as he pointed to the one with the blue gems, explaining that it would compliment my eyes best. I looked at the necklace silently, holding the gems up so they glinted in my bedroom's light. I chose the blue one, in the end.
When I went downstairs, Cleo was in sweatpants on the sofa, watching a Disney movie. She looked at me and gasped. "You're looking like a whole snack right now, Mallory."
I adjusted the hem of my dress, looking through my hair at her with a smirk. "Thanks, Cleo." I spun to show her the backless element, and she cheered, whooping like I was getting laid. But Reid and I were taking it slow, for now.
"Go get him!" Cleo cheered. "Like I said, if you need someone to knock some sense into that boy, I'm your girl."
I smiled gratefully at my best friend. "Thanks for having my back, Cleo."
"Any time, love. And remember," Cleo advised, "This is Reid we're talking about. He loves you. There's nothing to worry about as long as that remains true."
I resisted the urge to tell her that it wasn't true anymore. Love was a long way away from what I wanted. Emotionally blindsiding myself into thinking we were fine, wasn't working. I closed my eyes, trying to calm myself as a surge of anxiety enveloped me.
"Hey," Cleo got up from her seat to hug me. I clutched onto her for support. "It might not be okay now, but it will be. I know it will be. Someone with a heart as big as yours needs to share it with the world. Okay?"
I managed a tiny laugh, wiping my eyes. "Okay, Cleo. I trust you."
Fifteen minutes later, I was smoothing down the skirt of my blue dress and tapping the toe of my heel on the concrete pavement as I waited for Reid to show up. At last his car pulled up, and trepidation clawed at my chest. I felt my heart beat quicker as I locked eyes with Reid, who was lounging in the driver's seat.
I opened the door, sitting in the passenger seat as I adjusted myself, closing the door. Reid grinned broadly at me, his eyes lighting up. "Hey."
"Hi." I replied, smiling back nervously. It had been almost a month since I got ready for a date, excluding the times I went out with Reid since the accident.
Reid's eyes wandered down my figure, and he exhaled lightly. "You look more gorgeous than anything I could dream up."
I smiled, adjusting my necklace. "Does that mean you dream about me?"
"Every night." Reid replied humorously, which made me laugh. I tried to push away the thought that I actually dreamed about him. When you loved someone, everything about them became so dear. His face, his eyes, his nose.
I glanced away from him, taking in the street. Once I peeked back at Reid again, I found him already looking at me. I reached out to flick his nose, and he gave me a surprised smile in return. "Are we going, or do you want to spend the night looking at me?"
"I wouldn't mind looking at you. Don't worry, I chose a good restaurant." he replied, driving off. He peeked at me, giving a broad smile. "I wanted to properly take you somewhere for ages."
"For some reason, it's hard to believe that you used to dislike dating." I commented, touching my hair.
"That was in high school, when I was a clueless junior," Reid replied, smiling reminiscently, "University is a whole new thing."
Once we got to the restaurant, everything went perfectly. Reid ensured that I was comfortable throughout our date, and conversation flowed as easily as the wine poured into our glasses. "You know, I always wondered why you held me in such high esteem." I told him conversationally.
Reid looked at me with surprise in his eyes, then he laughed. "Mallory, you must have realized by now that you're a lovable person."
"Because you're you, Reid," I implored, taking his hand in mine. "That's a lot more than I need."
Reid gestured to me, his eyes wide. "See what I mean? You're exactly my type of person. If I had my memories back, I would never let you slip out of my fingers."
I smiled weakly. "You're still a sweet talker."
Reid shrugged. "I try. But I still don't know much about you. Tell me everything." He leaned back in his chair, giving me a relaxed smile.
I considered him thoughtfully. "You know most of the basics. I told you at Capulet's."
"I know enough to do a pop quiz on you." Reid quipped with a grin.
I raised an eyebrow challengingly. "Prove it."
He cracked his knuckles, mouth tipping upwards at the corner. "Deal."
I asked Reid a range of questions, from my favourite movie to my eye color, the latter of which I had to close my eyes for, and he got them all right. I stared at Reid in amazement when I gave up, and he just winked at me. "I pay attention. But I know there's a lot more to you. What about your family, do you have siblings?"
"I'm an only child, and I'm not on good terms with my family." I didn't realize that my expression became wistful, even melancholy, as I reminisced. But Reid didn't miss it. I could tell from the look on his face.
So I hastily coughed and changed the subject to our times at university. After a while, Reid regained his usual cheerfulness, smiling all too familiarly as I related various stories about us. He even occasionally asked questions, or commented on something with his old humor.
His loving smile used to be reserved for me, but now Reid gave it to everyone. I reminded myself that even if Reid was different now, I loved him regardless. Even if his memories never came back.
Then I realized that I never considered that outcome. What if Reid never remembered me? What if everything we shared was gone forever? What if fate decided we shouldn't end up together? There were too many questions. I was drowning again, suffocating in my overthinking.
"Mallory? Are you alright?" Reid questioned, staring at me with his hypnotizing eyes. They looked opaline in this light, shining with dark and light colors in the evening.
I blinked at him, forcing a smile. "Everything's fine, Reid. I have to go to the bathroom. I'll be back in a minute."
I stood up, forcing myself not to shake. I tried to control myself as I walked inside the small room clustered with cubicles. Then I allowed the floodgates to burst. I leaned heavily against the mirror as I drank in air, tears threatening to spill from my eyes. I was frustrated at myself for crying so often, but this wasn't normal. Losing my boyfriend of a year and a half didn't just happen.
This Reid was a stranger who looked the same, spoke in the same voice, lived the same life. But he wasn't mine. Rebuilding a castle from broken foundations, regardless of how similar the new castle was, would never replicate the old version. Incredibly selfish though it was, I wanted my old boyfriend back.
I tried to calm myself and looked for a back door. I needed to escape for a minute, to have space to breathe. I walked out of the bathroom, stilling my movements so I appeared calm, and eventually came across a door leading to the street. I left and circled back to the entrance, breathing in the fresh air. The tears on my cheeks dried quickly. I felt the swelling of my under-eyes quickly vanishing, and my heart settled in the quiet
And then someone approached me. I turned to take her in curiously, then my eyes widened in recognition. "I need to talk to you." Nina told me seriously.
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hours ago
Tony
I checked my phone for Reid's texts, and I sighed despondently.
Reid was taking Mallory on a date. He didn't know that I knew everything. He took Nina to a coffee shop the day before, and now he was dating Mallory. Everything was amalgamating into a mess of confusion. I didn't know how to pick apart the details.
I didn't know how to make Reid and Mallory right again.
Over the past few weeks, I began to suspect that Nina liked my brother. Nina spoke to Reid under the pretence of friendship, but she wanted more.
When I heard a knock on the door, I was bewildered to find Nina waiting on my parents' doorstep. She stepped forward to embrace me. I wondered how she had the confidence to pretend everything was fine between us.
"Things aren't weird between us, right?" Nina asked, looking up at me with doe eyes.
I frowned, ignoring the ache in my heart as I studied her face. "They are, but I still consider you my friend."
I let her into the house, and we sat in my room. Seeing Nina there felt surreal, like two separate parts of my life were binding together. Then I remembered that a few days ago, she came here to see Reid.
"So what do you want?" I asked Nina, once it became apparent that she didn't know what to say.
She sighed, looking stressed. "I need to get something off my chest."
That could never be good. "Okay. Is it something to do with Reid? You can tell me." I replied comfortingly, but I was willing her to stop talking. If it was what I thought, then I wanted no part in this conversation.
"Okay, but please don't hate me after this." Nina said, her mouth pursing at the corners. Her brow was furrowed.
I tried to ignore the fear that stemmed in me from her words. "I can't promise that."
She exhaled. "I guess I deserve that. Well, one night, I was drunk at Reid's apartment," Nina said pensively, cringing and wringing her hands. She caught sight of my expression and quickly backtracked. "I swear, Tony, I wouldn't have tried anything if I was sober. Reid took me home, and I probably said enough to make him suspect my feelings."
"Your feelings." I repeated numbly. My head hurt from the stress of Nina's confession; my heartbeat thrumming loudly against my skin. She didn't notice, but I was beyond surprise at this point. I felt pure disbelief, because I didn't think that Nina would actually admit it. I did think about it, but I dismissed the idea immediately.
Nina sighed. "I like Reid. I've liked him for a very long time, but things happened, and now it's the perfect time for me to tell you. Nothing happened between us that night, I swear, but I know I gave myself away to Reid. Tried to kiss him, maybe. I don't know, but it was enough to make him avoid me afterwards."
"What happened after that?" I asked, forcing my expression into neutrality.
Nina looked so downhearted, staring at the tabletop, that I was sure she didn't notice my distress. Her eyes darted to the floor as she talked.
"Reid never mentioned it again, but we've never been alone together after that night. He probably did it for Mallory's benefit. I respected that decision." Nina's voice became desperate, entreating me to understand. "But now he doesn't remember. I can't help but think it's a chance for my redemption. I can be friends with him, free from Reid's opinions on me. I can start over."
"So you want to be friends with my cousin?" I dared to ask. Her behaviour was off ever since Reid woke up, and these so-called feelings was the only feasible conclusion. I saw how Nina looked at him sometimes, with longing desperation, and I subconsciously put the pieces together in my head.
How could I have been so stupid? Of course Nina liked Reid. But it depended on how she dealt with her feelings; that could change things, I told myself. Like it didn't already hurt enough.
"I don't know. If there's any chance that maybe, we could, I mean," Nina said doubtfully, conflict shadowing her eyes.
"And what about Mallory, your best friend? Isn't there some sort of code among girl friends? You don't date the same guy." I rolled my eyes. I was so over this.
Nina looked like she'd been hit by a bullet as she digested my words. "Listen, of course I feel bad for Mallory. But Reid doesn't remember her anymore. Maybe it's a chance at a fresh start, for all of us."
My lip curled. "You would love that, wouldn't you?"
Her expression twisted with anger. "Tony, you can't judge me for what I feel. Just as I can't judge you for what you feel."
My hopes crashed to the ground. I got up from my seat, unable to look at her. Nina's beautiful eyes haunted me, with their sweet lines. She looked utterly bewildered by my annoyance.
But I'd finally had enough. "You're being selfish. Mallory was nothing but good to you before the accident, and now you're going to do this? She and Reid haven't cut ties yet. Until that happens, I can't be friends with you if you're going to pursue him."
Nina stared at the table again, like she wanted answers from it, rather than me. "Everyone used to say that Reid and Mallory were made for each other. What if they aren't?"
I scoffed to myself, but she didn't move. Didn't even blink. "Reid and Mallory are made for each other. That's the point. They'll always find their way back to each other."
Nina shrugged awkwardly. "Isn't that kind of toxic?"
I rolled my eyes. "People throw that word around too much. Not every relationship is toxic if there's issues. No one's perfect."
A perceptive, sharp smile curled Nina's mouth. "Not even Mallory?"
I stared at her. "No one calls Mallory perfect."
"Shows how much you know, Tony," Nina crossed her arm. Then her expression turned earnest, serious as she leaned towards me. Hungry to earn my sympathy. "If I don't take this as an opportunity, I won't be able to forgive myself."
"So what does that justify?" I asked.
"Reid adored Mallory, I know that. I don't care if I only earn a scrap of that love from him. I want something to change in my life, and I'm done letting other people's happiness get in the way of my own."
It sounded oddly rehearsed from her, like she thought about this conversation for a long time. I realised that Nina carefully pre-meditated the past week's encounters. She never accounted for Reid's crash, obviously, but she calculated every consequence of it. In conclusion, she wanted my brother. Badly. She'd get him by any means possible.
I switched tactics. "Please, Nina. Choose anyone but him."
I wasn't purely being selfish, even though I still liked Nina. I couldn't turn my feelings off for her. I was doing this because Mallory was close to my heart. I already considered her my sister-in-law of sorts, as well as my friend. Seeing her happy with Reid soothed my heart, because I knew that she was there for him when I couldn't be. Their happiness had been snatched away, but I was sure that they could find it again.
"I'm sorry, Tony," Nina said with a certain brand of finality, staring at the table, "But I can't help who I fell for."
That pushed me over the edge. I saw red. I slammed a fist on the bed, making Nina jump and stare wide-eyed at me. But I didn't care anymore. I strode out of my room without another thought. It wasn't surprising to me that Nina didn't protest against it.
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