to be the most important person I meet in Spearcrest.
I know it the moment I see her take a seat on the blue felt chair across from me, the moment her eyes sweep over me to watch the painting on the wall above my head. Her gaze brushes over me like starlight, like itâs almost too remote for me to feel it.
I watch her intently, sensing her importance.
Sheâs small and very pale, her skin almost see-through, like white fabric thatâs been drenched in water. Sheâs wearing a blue cardigan with long sleeves, but I already know that the insides of her arms will be a map of blue veins. I donât need to worry about seeing itâIâll see it someday.
Her hair is light, too, the palest gold, like sunlight in the winter. Itâs long and tied back from her face in neat plaits. Everything about her is delicate and fragile, like a porcelain doll. Her eyes are big and vividly blue. Sheâs not beautiful yet, sheâs barely even pretty, but sheâs going to be.
Sheâs going to be one of the most beautiful girls in the world.
I know all this because sheâs special.
I can tell from her eyes when our gazes finally meet, and from the way her voice quivers when she tells me her name. Theodora Dorokhova. Even her name is special. I repeat it in my mind after she says it. When Iâm alone later, Iâm going to say it out loud, the way I do when Iâm reading a book and I find a particularly satisfying sentence. Too satisfying to keep in my head, so I have to speak it, so I can taste the words and feel their weight and texture on my tongue.
We speak, and the more I speak to her, the firmer her voice becomes.
The quiver of her first sentence fades away. She speaks with perfect diction, with a smooth cadence. Her voice is far more expressive than her face. Does she know this?
Our conversation is a test.
Thereâs a reason Iâm seeing this girl right now, a reason she wasnât at the summer school days when I met the other students who are going to be in my year. Thereâs a reason we meet like this, today, when Iâve come in on a random day because my father is meeting with the other governors.
Thereâs a reason Iâm the first person in Spearcrest to meet Theodora Dorokhova.
When our conversation transforms from a discussion into an argument, I decide itâs time to relent. I apologise for having offended her, even though I know sheâs not offended.
She replies that Iâve not offended her. Her voice is hard and cold. It has the satisfying texture of icicles, sharp but smooth.
Iâve angered her, I think, but itâs hard to tell. I hope I have. I have the feeling handling Theodora Dorokhova isnât going to be like handling other people our age. Handling her is going to be like handling an adultâlike playing chess against a greater opponent, not a lesser one.
Sheâll be good at concealing her true feelings, Iâm guessing. Sheâll wish to fight me without stepping on the battlefield, to gain her victories without appearing to be in the skirmish at all. Sheâll want to compete with me without ever acknowledging me as her rival.
Sheâs going to be difficult and rigid and cold, like a thing of steel.
And thatâs why sheâs going to be the most important person here. Because Iâll never be able to become the best I possibly can without being properly tested and challenged. Heroes donât become legends without fighting some great opposing force.
Theodora is going to become that great opposing force.
âWhatâs your favourite book, then?â I ask her.
Iâm not smiling at herâI donât need her to know her importance yet. Like an enemy kingdom, Iâm better off making sure Theodora never sees attacks coming. I need to keep her as unprepared as possible, on the back foot. I need to make her slip up, scramble, rally. Her failures will become my victories.
âMy favourite book is ,â she answers. Her voice is pleasantly sharp. I want to press it against my skin and see if itâll draw blood. âWhatâs yours?â
I donât have a favourite book. Most of the time, when I read, Iâm forcing myself. Forcing myself to get through dense prose, pausing every five minutes to look up words and references. I never read books that are easy to understandâI wouldnât respect myself if I read the novels and comics my peers are reading. Magic and teenage spies and superheroes.
I read because I am the son of Lord and Lady Blackwood, and that means I must be better than everybody else. My superiority demands superior intellect. So I read, but never for pleasure.
âMy favourite book is .â
Itâs only a half-lie. I liked , and the story is one I think about often. Whatâs not to love about the doggedness of vengeance? But itâs also an enormous book, and now Theodora Dorokhova wonât be able to look down on me for reading short books.
She smilesâa small, restrained smile, but the first Iâve seen on her face.
Itâs an odd thing, her smile. It holds light but no warmth, like the cold gleam of moonlight.
âOh,â she says, âIâve actuallyââ
Then the door to Mr Ambroseâs office opens, and Theodoraâs voice dies like the extinguished flame of a candle.
The smile dies with it.
A man precedes Mr Ambrose out. The man Theodora arrived with. I can only assume heâs her father, even though he looks nothing like her. Dark hair, hard eyes, and the sort of brutal, unpleasant strength of a big ugly factory.
Theodora looks up at him, her mouth still open. Her blue eyes are full of an expression I canât read or comprehend. I would have guessed fear if it didnât seem so unlikely to me that someone could be so afraid of their own father.
Mr Ambrose says goodbye to the man, then smiles at Theodora. âGoodbye for now, Theodora. See you on the first of September.â
She returns his smile, except itâs not really a smile. Thereâs no light in it, not even the cold gleam of moonlight. Itâs just a dull stretch of her lips.
âCome,â the man commands without looking at her.
He walks away. Theodora stands. Her fingers are curled around the ends of her sleeves, gripping the wool tightly. She hurries after the man without a word.
âNice to meet you, Theodora,â I say to her as she walks past me.
She turns and looks at me in surprise. Her eyes widen but she says nothing. Then her gaze slides off me, and she disappears around the corner.
âIs she very clever, Mr Ambrose?â
Mr Ambrose turns to me with a strange smile. âVery clever, Zachary. Just as clever as you are.â
I nod, his words confirming the solemnity I feel, the sense that Theodora is special.
âIs that man her father?â I ask.
Mr Ambrose nods slowly, casting one last glance down the corridor. âYes, he is.â He gives me a sudden smile. âWhen she arrives in September, Iâd like you to make her feel welcome, Zachary. Help her settle in, make sure sheâs okayâlook after her. Can you do that?â
âOf course, sir.â
âYou promise?â
âI swear it, sir.â
I say it like a vowâit feels like a vow.
The weight of it settles on me like the blade on the shoulder of a knight. Mr Ambrose has just given me a sacred dutyâa task too important to give anybody else. Itâs an obligation and an honour, one Iâll never abandon or fail.