My lips are still tingling.
I'm looking at her but I can still feel her lips on mine. Just like how they were a second ago.
She's standing right in front of me, just as breathless as I am. But now, I can see it clearer than ever. I know what Georgia is going to do. The hesitation she has, her fingers lightly tapping on her upper thigh, like she's about to put her wall up again.
Not this time, Georgia.
I reach for her wrist and I grip them hard enough so that she won't run away but not hard enough for it to cause pain to her. "Georgia." My voice is somehow steady although I am still processing the fact that we just kissed again. "Please don't do that. Don't act like you didn't just-"
"I know what I did, Jules." Her voice is soft, but the kind of soft that someone has when they have to admit something bad they've done.
I'm deciding to take another step closer to her and I can now feel hear breath again. We're close enough that I could kiss her again if I wanted to. And I really do want to kiss her again. I really do.
But I need her to say it.
"Then please Georgia. Please don't run from it."
Her eyes search mine and then her eyes forward to my lips but only for a second. She doesn't have to say anything but I know she is thinking of kissing me again.
My grip on her wrists loosen and she begins to pull away.
"Jules this can't, I can't-"
But I'm not letting her finish that sentence. "Stop." The tone of my voice is a little more stricter than I intended but I don't even care. "Just stop. If you regret it, anything between us, then just say it. If you don't want this, if you don't want me, then just tell me that. But please don't stand here and act like this didn't mean something to you. Because I'm done with that."
She's silent.
She doesn't even open her mouth to try and figure out what she wants to say.
The silence gives me an answer.
An answer I knew but didn't want to face.
I'm taking a step back away from her, and nodding like I understand any of this. When really I don't.
"The least you can do is not lie to me." My eyes close for a second, just so I don't have to deal with her face for a minute. "I'm done waiting for you Georgia. I can't keep living like this. Can't keep acting like any of this isn't damaging my mental health and acting like this is okay when really, it's not."
I turn around, ready to leave her house unsatisfied like all the prior times before.
But she stops me.
Not with words, or another dumbass excuse, but with her hand wrapped around my right wrist.
As always, I freeze when I feel her skin on mine. Yes, even if it's just her fucking hand.
"Wait."
That word comes out of Georgia's mouth almost as if it was a struggle. Like if that word came out of her mouth, it would signify what she wants for her future.
For us.
She's never done this for us before. She's never stopped or reached for me first. But now she has.
I say and roll my eyes as I turn around to face her again. "Why should I stop? Huh?" She's silent. "So that you can just repeat the same thing over and over again so I can feel so shit about myself?! I can't keep doing this Georgia."
Her grip on me tightens but then she slowly starts to let go. "I know. I know."
The way she says that, it's almost like she's giving in. That just like me, she's tired of whatever the fuck is going on between us and she's actually ready to let this relationship start to bloom or go somewhere.
I take another step forward towards her and to my surprise, she doesn't back away.
"Then what do you want?" I'm trying to search in her beautiful goddamn eyes but they're unreadable. They always have and they always will. "Because I've told you so many times what I wanted Georgia, and I swear to God I will leave here so fast if you just don't say it."
Her mouth opens but nothing comes out.
But who's even phased about that anymore? Because I'm certainly not.
"That's what I thought."
I turn, ready to walk out, once and for all.
But then she kisses me.
I don't even get a second to react before she presses her lips onto mine. Her hands cupping my face, like she's scared I'm going to go.
But I can assure you, I am not going anywhere anytime soon.
If you know what I mean. Wink.
I grab onto the waistband of her sweatpants, pulling her closer as I deepen the kiss until theirs nothing between us but our bodies touching. The kiss is messy, desperate, and most importantly, real.
She's running her hands through my hair as I hold her from the lower of her back and now I know that she wants this. Just as much as I do.
Maybe even more than me.
And finally, she stopped running.
I'm honestly so unsure if this is going to ruin things between us or make things better. Because I don't want her to run away. But she said she won't. And I trust her. Right now though? All I want is more.
I let my hands begin to roam up and down the sides of her body, her t-shirt lifting up a little bit each time. I hesitate for a second, but I'm now deciding I don't care anymore.
We've gone far already. Whom will it hurt if I go a little bit farther?
I slip my hands under her shirt, pressing my fingers into her bare skin, and I can feel the goosebumps that just appeared on her skin. Then, she melts into me.
"Jules." She breathes against my lips as I can feel her heartbeat against mine.
After she says my name, I pull back away from her, only a little so I can look into her eyes. They're dark, full of something that I can't quite figure out. "What is it, Georgia? Do you want me to stop?"
She swallows. Her hands tighten on my arms as her gaze flickers between my eyes and my lips.
"No." She shakes her head. "I don't."
Well, lucky for her, that's all I need.
My lips connect with hers as I deepen the kiss even more than last time. I turn us around and move until her back is now pressed against her front door.
We stare at each other for a second as her chest rises and drops rapidly, like she still can't believe she let herself get this far.
But she's not stopping me.
And she's not stopping either.
She looks down at the floor but my finger lifts her chin up so she looks at me again. "Look at me Georgia."
She says nothing and neither do I. All I do is smash my lips even harder against her as her head hits the door. Her hands are just below my chest and this time my one hand is fully on her ass as my other is resting on the door.
Her touching me, even there is enough to send shivers down my body.
Now this time the roles are reversed and she slips her hands under my hoodie as the kiss grows more and more desperate.
Honestly, I don't even know where my hands are. All I know is that I physically cannot stop touching this woman. My lips part from hers as I begin to pepper kisses down on her jawline, and then finally her neck as she groans and rolls her head back.
"Jules," she murmurs, almost desperate.
I freeze for a moment, and look in her eyes as I begin to overthink and wonder if I just did anything wrong.
But my answer comes when she pulls me into another kiss, scared like I'm going to run away.
Definitely not going to happen.
I kiss her harder and harder and hear a small gasp escape her mouth when I pull our bodies even closer together.
She tugs at the hem of my hoodie. "Shit Jules."
I break the kiss, so I can look at her. "You okay? Did I do something wrong? If you want me to stop, I'll stop."
Her fingers brush the hair out of my face and tucks them behind my ear and she nods. "Yeah, I'm okay." She's breathless. "It's just, I don't know what I'm doing."
I let out a small laugh. "Me neither." And she lets out a laugh too.
And that's the truth.
I have no idea where this is going or what any of it even means or if she's going to regret any or all of this tomorrow morning. But all that matters to me right now is that she's here. With me.
"We don't have to figure it out tonight," I whisper.
Georgia lets out a shaky breath and nods again. Then I can finally read her eyes. She's willing to stop fighting this feeling, and finally ready to give us a go.
So I kiss her again, and this time I take my time with it, slow and gentle.
"Guess you're not pretending anymore, huh?" I tease her.
She rolls her eyes but still doesn't let go of me. "Oh shut up."
She's smiling, a very subtle smile but it's there. And it's a real smile.
Georgia pulls me in for one last kiss and then we finally break away from each other.
"Well I should probably get going now." Unfortunately.
"Fine." Her response catches me off guard. "But text me when you get home so I know that you're safe." She opens up her front door, letting me exit first.
I turn around and salute her. "Will do. Bye Georgia."
"Bye Jules."
And for once, Georgia walks out with me, instead of just staring through the window, acting like she doesn't care.
Because she finally does.
Authors Words:
Hey yall.....how yall doin?!
I refuse to read this rn bc ill cringe a lil so if theres typos sorry but I will be reading tmrw to make sure the grammar/typos are all good.
I hope yalls expectations are fulfilled
Sorry if u guys expected smut but i will LIT cringe
Idk maybe I gotta use like my snap AI to write that shit out or smthn idk