Ms. Reed's POV
My second most favorite day of the week.
Friday.
It's close to Saturday but not quite Saturday. On Friday's I still have to wake up early and see ugly ass faces I swear to never see once I leave this school or I retire. I also have to stay an hour after each school day to check emails, and meetings.
Also including the days where Jules used to come and see me because she wanted to.
Speaking of which, I'm in my boring ass classroom right now.
But I can't argue.
I took Wednesday and yesterday off because I honestly just needed a break from everyone and everything. My mental health hasn't been the greatest lately and I feel myself starting to crack a little more and more each day.
Although it pained me to be away from someone- who I will not say, those two days off were the best option for me.
Look, I'm only going to say this once and one time only. But I do regret all of the things I said to her on Tuesday. It's just better and safer that we remain a big distance from each other.
I'm sending a voice chat to someone on messages but the door is creaking open so it's ruining my memo.
My stomach drops and I don't even have to look to the left of me to know who just opened and walked through that door.
Of course she shows up.
She's probably been waiting all week.
"Didn't think you'd be here today."
I look up and see Jules standing right in front of me, looking composed. Something I wish I could be. What I wish I could've been ever since Monday.
"And you couldn't say this to me in gym today because? I told you that we shouldn't be in the same room alone together anymore Jules. It's not safe."
Jules lets out a scoff. "Enough with this Ms. Reed. Stop lying to yourself." There's a moment of silence, I am clueless of what to say but Jules opens her mouth again. "Are you going to pretend that night never happened? Or are you going to hope that I will?"
My heart drops and breaks.
Somehow, I'm even more speechless of what to say than before.
"Ms. Reed?" Jules looks at me, a shift in her expression. Concern filling her face.
My throat is tight, my fingernails are about to make scrapes on my desk, and I feel like I'm about to explode at any moment now.
"Tell me you don't care and I'll leave. I'll never bother you again."
I still say nothing.
What am I supposed to say?
The silence is unbearable and I'm now hearing Jules inhale very sharply as it's almost like she's trying her hardest to not let something show.
Jules looks down at the ground. "The least you could do is drive me home."
"No." No hesitation.
Jules eyes look straight into mine and I can see frustration building inside of her. "Yes. You've been ignoring everything that's been going on between us Georgia, and I'm fucking sick of it. If nothing happened then I'm sure you have no problem driving me home just like other times before."
I sit there, jaw dropped.
Even though she called me by my first name which is very inappropriate, especially on school grounds, she clocked me and she's right. If nothing happened then driving home shouldn't be a problem...right?
"Fine. Let's go."
Jules' face is casual but I can tell she's trying her hardest not to smile.
I stand up and make my way towards the door, not holding it open for Jules. I'm trying to stay as far away from this girl as I can.
We've been in the car for about two minutes now and all it's been filled with is silence. I don't even have my playlist playing. I'm trying to pay attention to only the road but my mind is not letting me. It keeps drifting to things I wish I could forget. Things Jules won't let me forget.
The tension is suffocating me. Probably suffocating her just as much.
I'm trying my best to not look at her but she's just so quiet. Unlike her usual self. Even when we were in a fight, she would try and talk to me. This time she's not.
Finally, Jules breaks the silence.
"You really love avoiding things, don't you?" Her voice is calm as she's looking at me but I'm still paying attention to the roads.
I gulp.
I'm not ready to talk about this. Not yet.
"What's your solution here, Georgia? Going to keep acting like it didn't happen? Because I swear to God Georgia I will keep hammering you about this until you finally fucking admit it."
I'm so close to unlocking my car doors and pushing her out of my car but I unfortunately care too much to leave her stranded.
Jules leans back in her seat, making herself comfortable like it's her car.
"Least you could do is drive me home." Jules shrugs.
Isn't that what I'm doing right now?
It takes me a second to register what she means by that.
I glance briefly at her, trying my best to seem calm and neutral. My heart is racing and pounding so fast right now but I can't let her see that.
I feel the pressure building inside of me. "No." I try my best to say that as firmly and as strictly as I can but nothing I say or do intimidates her anymore.
"Why, what's wrong? You scared?" Wherever this confidence is coming from in Jules, I fucking hate it.
The number of seconds of silence keep adding on as I stare blankly at the road. The walls keep closing in and I'm left with no other choice. "Fine."
I put my blinker on to go right- the direction I never wanted to go in unless I was alone.
The whole ride, I've been fighting with no one but myself. Jules has all the confidence and boldness somebody fucking needs and keeps forcing me to face everything that I've been trying to avoid.
I just pulled into my driveway and turned off my car. It hasn't even been a second since I turned it off and Jules is already out of the car.
She's making her way to my front door, acting like it's her house. Of course I have the key so she has absolutely no way to get in except from me unless she breaks in.
My mind is going all over the place as I'm opening up my door, regretting it more and more the further it opens up. This should be my home but right now it feels more like a cage.
Jules lets me walk in first and even though she just shut the door, she's not moving away from it. Almost like she's trying to stop me incase I try to escape.
"A stubborn woman you are, aren't you?" Her voice is low and not one stutter as the words flow out of her mouth.
I look at her. "I don't want this."
"Really?" Her eyes are now looking into mine, not with a flicker of sadness, but with a flicker of anger. Okay maybe a little bit of sadness. "Because if you didn't want this, you would've never let it go this far!" Her voice cracks on the last word and now it's obvious more than ever she was just trying her best to act composed this whole time. Manipulating me into letting her into my own house. And of course, I fell for it. Not because I was stupid, but because Jules is the only person I'd actually do it for.
She's right though.
I did want this.
I know myself well enough to know that if I didn't want this, I would've never let it go this far. But I did want this. And I fucking despise it.
Jules takes a step forward, away from the door, closer to me.
I should be saying something right now but I can't find what words to say. I'm too lost in Jules to even remember what words exist and when the appropriate time to use them is.
"Just tell me what you want, Georgia." She scans me, up and down. "Because I'm tired and I'm not going to let you hide from this anymore. Not from me."
The truth is sitting on the top of my tongue because I'm too scared to admit the truth. Once it's out there, then it's out. No going back.
She takes another step forward and instead of pushing her away from me, I do the only thing I can do at this point.
I reach for her.
Her breath fills the silence as my hands reach for her arms. Just touching her subtly lights up the fireworks inside of my body. The tension vanishes and her hands touch my arms and an electric current comes upon me.
She's looking up straight into my eyes and now we're close enough to where I can finally see it, the truth: She wants this too.
Before I can even stop myself, the slim proximity between us disappears and the rest of the world fades away.
Now, my lips are on hers.
Her lips are softer than how they felt the other night. Although they're softer, the kiss is filled with more desperateness than that night. This time, we're finally saying the words we've both been wanting to say. There's passion, frustration, everything that I've tried to ignore and everything that I've wanted.
She slides her hands down my waist and to my hips as she pulls me closer. Her hands stay there and she has the tightest grip on me, like she never wants to let me go.
The kiss ends and I can finally feel the weight of what is to come.
I'm breathless. Even more breathless than Monday.
I look at her, and she is just as breathless as I am. Her eyes filled with nothing but craving me even more. I want her just as bad but it's best to stop now.
"Jules," I whisper her name but her name is the only thing that comes out.
Her pupils are dilated and her lips are still parted like she's still processing what just happened.
"I don't want to go back, Georgia," she finally says. "I don't want to pretend anymore Georgia. Not with you."
And for the first time in what feels like forever, I'm realizing that maybe, just maybe, this is something I don't want to deny anymore and that we can both face what's next.
Together.
Authors Words:
Just wanted to say thank you so much for 10k reads. May not seem like a lot to some people but for me it is bc this silly little idea of a book I had came to life this big.
Extremely grateful for you all <3
See yall next chapter (its a good one)(I didnt even start writing it yet)