WILLIAM FELT LIKE he was right back where he started. Moping by himself over another man, in his small house situated on the top of a hill. Waiting for his emotions to pass him, by allowing them to hit him all at once.
He stopped looking at his phone because every time he did, he got a notification that his viral post with Orion was still getting likes. He had thought about deleting the picture, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. Every time he admired the picture of him and Orion, it allowed him to pretend that they had met under normal circumstances. It was a glimpse of what they could have been if they had.
William couldn't stop thinking about the circumstances. All of William's desires were blurred together, to the point where he didn't know what he truly wanted to begin with. Even if it was Orion's job to grant wishes, had William only seen him as such a vessel? Was that why it was so easy for him to send the poor man away in the heat of the moment? What if the two men had met as normal guys at a library? Would there have been a better outcome because they were both humans that met under normal circumstances?
These are the thoughts that had been spiralling in William's head for the last month. He had trapped himself in his house without even realizing it. William was a prisoner in his mind, and the guilt and regret he felt held him down in shackles. Summer tended to be a time of freedom and carelessness, but if one was too careless, then freedom could be replaced with captivity.
He hadn't gone stargazing since he went with Orion. He used to do it multiple times a week, but he felt ashamed. He didn't want Orion to look down at him from the sky. He imagined that Orion would watch amusedly as he sat on the grass alone without Christian after making a big deal about getting back together with him. Although Orion would never do this, William's regret and shame made him think that he would.
William was forced out of his thoughts as a slipper flew towards his face.
He groaned as he sat up from his bed, and stared at the female reflection of him in the flesh. "Willow."
She stared down at him a few feet from his bed. Her curly hair draped down her shoulders, and her crossed arms already told William how she felt.
"William." She hissed, "I got a text from Christian. You've been MIA, and haven't spoken to anyone in weeks. What on earth is going on?"
William and Willow looked quite similar for fraternal twins of opposite genders, and because of that, he couldn't help but look at the frustration on her face and wonder if that was the same look that Orion had received before he faded away.
William stayed silent and laid back down on his bed. If he could explain this to anyone, it would be Willow, but he was hesitant. Willow's wisdom could cut through a person like a knife, and her sharp tongue was so impactful that people often found themselves speechless at her statements. He knew that if anyone would tell him off, it would be his sister, and he wasn't ready to hear about the stupid decisions he had made without a second thought.
"Is this about you breaking up with that guy in your post? According to Christian, you have known him for around like three weeks. Is it ever that serious?"
Was it that serious? William's despair didn't only have to do with the fact that he realized he wanted to be with Orion way too late, but because he quite literally was the destroyer of Orion's joy. He was a star in the sky, who was exhilarated to live the human experience, and William had taken that from him abruptly without letting him properly make peace with his departure. He knew how much Orion loved being here on Earth, and he still made that unnecessary last wish.
So, William let the guilt carry him through his days. The feelings of shame and regret told him to refrain from others. To hide, so that nobody would notice what a difficult person he was.
William knew he treated Orion poorly, but maybe if he told his sister, she would help him make things right.
William motioned for Willow to come sit at the edge of his bed, and on her way, she picked up the slipper she had thrown at him and muttered an apology.
"I need to tell you something, and I need you to believe me." William finally said to her.
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Willow hummed. "See, I would say that was absolute bull if you didn't look like a depressed, pathetic version of me right now."
William narrowed his eyes.
"But," Willow said as her voice softened, "William, I hope you know that you're not the only person in the world who has made a mistake. If you really do think you want to have another shot with him, even if it's just to satiate your conscience, go get him."
"But he's not on Earth."
Willow snorted, "Yeah, that part is kind of crazy, but I'm sure if there are flying star men you might be able to find some kind of magical, powerful rock on the sand to help you?"
"Willow", William groaned, "I'm serious. I can't even wish him back because you aren't allowed to have second chances...Could you help me wish him back?"
"Oh," Willow said absentmindedly, "yeah, sure."
William enveloped his sister in a hug. For the majority of his life, the only person he could depend on was his sister. Their father was a felon who chose a life of crime over a life of camaraderie, and their mother was a self-absorbed woman who had no interest in the lives of her grown children unless it was the first of the month, when she frequently asked for money. William had attached himself to Willow all his life, and when Christian came around, he found himself attached to Christian.
William didn't want to live a life like this anymore. The constant state of sticking close to whoever was around him in his life proved to be tiring and felt restrictive. He wanted to choose intimacy with someone for once, not forced intimacy as a result of being born at the same time, or because they were forced to go to the same school and extracurriculars for eight years.
As he pulled away from their hug, he suddenly remembered something. "You know, part of the reason I wished for Orion to help me make Christian jealous was because you told me Christian started seeing someone else. Were you even sure about that?"
Willow's eyes widened as she nodded her head eagerly, and William crossed his arms as he awaited her response.
Willow dragged a hand across her face as she groaned. "Dude, so basically let me explain. You know Lucas, right?"
William nodded. He briefly remembered the shy, quiet boy being his sister's favourite friend in her statistics class.
"He had been.. trying to get with Christian for a while. I told him it would never happen, and he accepted that. Well, I thought he accepted that. Until I realized that they had been talking the entirety of last semester."
William raised an eyebrow. "Where is this going?"
"I'm getting there." Willow sassily put a hand out, forming a stop signal. "Lucas' dad is pretty big on art. He'd always show me these famous art pieces his dad bought with the help of his agent named Henry Steeles."
Well, shit.
Willow took a deep breath and shook her head. "When I saw Christian a week later talking to this said guy named Henry who also happened to have a business card with 'Steeles' on it in his suit pocket, I knew that Lucas had managed to get Christian Henry as his manager. Henry is a pretty hard-to-reach agent without connections, so I just assumed thatâ"
"That's how you knew that Christian and Lucas had been talking to each other, even when we were together." William chuckled painfully. "He was probably cheating, wasn't he?"
Willow nodded, looking away from her brother.
"And you didn't think it was important to tell me this?" William exclaimed before he paused and his voice got quieter. "If you told me it was Lucas and that they had been talking for such a long time, yeah I still would have been jealous, but I might've given up on him."
"I didn't want to hurt you, William. You take things like this really hardâ I mean look at your state right now. I thought it would have been easier for you to accept that he had met a new guy, not that he had been... sleazing with one behind your back for a while."
William wouldn't have wanted Christian back if he knew this information. Yes, he was attached to Christian, but he still had at least an ounce of respect for himself. He would have never begged to be with a man who was cheating on him for an entire semester. But, he also probably wouldn't have met Orion if his sister hadn't lied, so he bit his tongue and decided that he would deal with Willow, Christian, and Lucas later.
"It's... alright. I just hope you aren't still friends with Lucas."
" I blocked that loser after I realized he might have just wanted to be friends with me to get the deets on you and Christian. There's no way I would ever speak to him after all that."
William hummed with satisfaction.
"Now," Willow abruptly stood up, "let's go get your star boy back."
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William sobbed on the ground as his sister didn't know what to do. A shooting star never appeared, and this left William devastated. William thought that it was a direct rejection from Orion, but not everything is what it seems.
Willow soothingly rubbed his back. She squeezed him tight and whispered words of encouragement, but William didn't feel any of the emotions she was trying to evoke in him. He only felt sorrow.
"Maybe he's resting? Or there's a period where he can't grant wishes again for some time? Let's just go back, William. Let's just... forget about Orion."
"No." William sobbed. "He doesn't want to see my face ever again. I-I messed up so bad, Willow. It's eating me alive because I know that I didn't treat him well, and I can't even make up for it."
Willow was silent as she rubbed her brother's back once more.
He believed that he would never see Orion again. He hadn't known him for a long time, but he had known that he loved everything that he learned about him, and would love what was still left to learn.
William believed he would never be able to nurture a relationship between him and Orion ever again, and so he cried.
But it's funny how life works sometimes. Sometimes, the person to mend your troubles will be the person you least expect.