Chapter 17

Jack stood at the edge of a cliff, gazing at the ocean. Normally, he found the sound of the waves calming. But he wasn’t in the mood to be calmed.

He’d fucked up. Badly. He should never have pushed Gwen like he had today in her office. He’d been mindless with wanting her and it’d made him stupid. If he would’ve just used his brain for one millisecond, this entire catastrophe could’ve been avoided.

Jack had hated leaving Gwen. He’d only done it because she’d asked him to. In his mind’s eye, he saw her with her arms wrapped around her, her eyes filled with fear.

Fear. She’d been afraid of him. It made Jack loathe himself for making her feel that way.

He’d texted her an hour ago, but she hadn’t replied. He’d almost called her; he resisted the urge. Even as he wanted to take her into his arms and make that fear in her eyes melt away, he knew that she’d need to initiate next time.

Jack went home when it got dark. He ate some tasteless frozen dinner. He drank more than he knew he should. He even considered calling Luke again, just to hear another human voice.

But the thought of telling his friend everything made Jack hesitate. The thought of spilling his guts to Luke made Jack want to drink another glass of whiskey. Probably the only way he would tell Luke about all this shit was if he were raging drunk.

When Jack heard a knock on his door, it was so faint that he assumed it was the wind. When it happened a second time, Jack lurched to his feet, frowning.

And on his doorstep was Gwen Parker. It wasn’t raining this time, fortunately.

Jack wondered if he’d drunk so much that he was hallucinating.

“Are you real?” he said.

Gwen looked down at herself. “I think so. Do I look not real?”

“You look like an angel and a demon all in one.”

Gwen let out a startled laugh. She stepped inside, undeterred that Jack hadn’t invited her in.

“A demon? That’s not a very nice thing to say to your friend.” She wagged a finger.

“Because you haunt me. No matter what I do. I need an exorcism.”

“I think ghosts haunt people, not demons.” Gwen went over and touched Jack’s cheek. “I’m sorry, for today. For everything.”

He closed his eyes, leaning into her touch. Pressing her hand that lay on his cheek, he said, “I’m the one who should be apologizing. I scared you.” He opened his eyes to see her face. “I never, ever, want to see that look on your face again. If I vow anything, it’s that you will never have cause to be afraid of me.”

“You stopped, Jack. You did exactly what I needed.”

“Not soon enough.”

She brushed her fingers across his jaw, feeling the stubble. Then she traced a line down his throat.

He’d been wrong: she wasn’t a demon. She was a siren, and he knew he’d happily crash his ship into the rocks just to hear her sweet voice.

“You stopped,” she repeated firmly. “I just freaked out. It was a lot of things all at once.”

“Again, my fault.”

“Then we’re both idiots. Will that work?”

That remark made him smile. “I won’t commit to calling you an idiot.”

Gwen turned away. She gazed at the bare walls of Jack’s house, at the basic furniture, the simplicity of it all. Of course, she found the one framed photo he had on a table and picked it up.

“This must be your mom,” she said. “And apparently, you were already good at scowling even as a kid.”

Jack looked at the photo over Gwen’s shoulder. It was one of the few family photos of Debra, Danny, and Jack together. Jack would’ve been five or so; Danny, just a baby. Their mom had had periods of sobriety, and this had been one of them.

Jack had remembered his mom waking him up and getting him dressed in an itchy shirt and slacks. She’d been excited, telling him that they were going to get their pictures taken at Sears. “I even bought you a bow tie!” she’d said, clipping on the little red tie that Jack had played with throughout the photoshoot.

“That’s my brother, Danny,” said Jack, pointing to the plump baby in his mom’s arms.

“You don’t talk about him much.”

Jack lifted his shoulder in a shrug. “We aren’t close.”

Returning the photo frame to the table, Gwen turned so she faced Jack. “My brother and I are pretty close, but not super close. I think we’re like any other brother and sister. Since Elliot moved away and got married, though, he’s been too busy to pay much attention to his little sister.”

“You miss him.”

Now it was time for Gwen to shrug. “I miss him; I miss our dad. I miss my mom, of course. It’s hard not having family close by. When I was young, I didn’t realize how much I depended on them. When Elliot moved, then our dad a few years later, I’ll admit a part of me felt kind of abandoned.”

Jack brushed a stray curl from her forehead. “I’m still here,” he rumbled.

“You’ve been a good friend to me. Better than I deserved, probably.”

“You deserve everything, Gwen. You deserve all the good in this world. Don’t ever think otherwise.”

She looked away, her lip trembling. Jack turned her back toward him. He kissed her gently.

It wasn’t a kiss of seduction: it was a kiss of promises. A kiss that said, ~I’m here, and I’ll always be here. ~Even if Gwen decided tomorrow that she wanted nothing to do with him, he’d watch over her.

“I want us to pick up where we left off,” said Gwen softly.

Jack stilled. “You’re going to have to be very clear what you mean.”

“I mean, I want to have sex with you. Tonight.”

A blush climbed up her cheeks, which was so charming that Jack’s chest ached. And then he thought of today in her office, and his cock began to harden. He’d been so close to paradise already. He didn’t know if he could survive getting so close again, only to be denied.

“Are you sure?”

She touched his chest. “Completely sure.”

* * *

Gwen felt her nerves disappear. Maybe it was because she was entirely in control of the situation. Or maybe it was because she knew she’d always be safe with Jack.

His eyes were dark, his nostrils flared, as she caressed his chest. She remembered how it’d felt, pressed against him in her office, and she wanted to strip out of her clothes so there was nothing between them.

Jack cupped her cheek. “What’s the safe word?”

“Salmon.” She wrinkled her nose. “I won’t use it this time, though.”

“You don’t know that for sure.”

Strangely, it seemed like Jack was hesitating more than she was. Not wanting to argue with him, she began to unbutton his shirt, pushing it aside to reveal a white undershirt underneath. His chest was rising and falling in quick breaths.

Gwen kissed him over his heart.

“You’re killing me,” he growled, sifting his fingers through her hair.

“Then take me to bed.”

Jack glanced at his bed: it was probably no bigger than a full, and Gwen wondered if they’d both fit. She hadn’t thought about those kinds of logistics when she’d decided to drive over here.

“How do you have sex with anyone in your bed?” Gwen mused aloud.

Jack let out a startled laugh. “Because I’m usually on top. Don’t need a big bed for that.” He grinned. “Or we can have sex on the table, in front of the fireplace, outside—”

“Okay, okay, I get it. You’re a sex fiend.”

“And you love it.”

She couldn’t disagree. They undressed each other in between kisses, laughing when Jack struggled to unhook Gwen’s bra. They laughed when Gwen began to take off Jack’s jeans, only to remember he was still wearing his shoes.

They finally tumbled into Jack’s bed, naked and glorious, and Gwen couldn’t stop kissing him. She felt like she was going to burst out of her skin from sheer happiness. Had sex ever been this exciting for her? Not even when she and Tim had been newly married had she felt like this.

Jack soon made sure she was under him, just like he’d described. He kissed her as his hands traveled the length of her body. He cupped her breasts, flicking her nipples, before kissing and licking seemingly every inch of her skin.

When he sucked a nipple into his mouth, Gwen arched and moaned. When he swirled his tongue inside her belly button, she giggled.

But it was when he parted her legs and licked her already wet core that made her want to scream. She bit her lip, pleasure bursting like fireworks inside her veins, as he played her body like a musical instrument.

“I want to hear you moan,” he said, his voice guttural, as he looked up at her. “Don’t try to stay quiet. There’s no one around to hear you, anyway.”

Gwen had always tried to keep any noises soft during sex. It’d been embarrassing, and the one time she’d been too loud, Tim had teased her about it for weeks.

But that memory faded as Jack pressed one finger, then a second, inside her tight sheath. Her orgasm hovered at the edge of her consciousness. Her entire body tightened.

Jack let her hang at the edge until she whined. He just laughed softly at her.

“I want you to come around my cock.” His heated whisper made her shiver. He gave one last soft lick of her clit before crawling up her body.

He kissed her as he riffled through his drawer. Eventually, he had to stop kissing her to find a condom. He swore when he struggled to find one.

“You clearly weren’t prepared,” said Gwen.

“I’ll keep them in a jar by my bed next time,” he quipped.

Her near-orgasm had faded somewhat, and she watched with heavily lidded eyes as Jack rolled a condom down his length.

Then he was on top of her, pushing her legs apart, his breath on her face. He watched her intently as he pushed inside her.

Gwen gasped at the fullness. Where she expected pain, there was none. Only some pressure, then a feeling that made her tremble. She clenched herself around him, which made Jack’s eyes close.

“Gwen,” he whispered.

Then he started moving. Gently, slowly, never breaking eye contact with her. Gwen reached up and took his face to bring him down for a kiss.

The bed squeaked with every thrust; Gwen’s toes curled from the pleasure. She could feel that lovely orgasm returning, like the sound of a train soon approaching.

“You’re so tight, so wet.” Jack kissed her harder as he picked up the pace. “Are you going to come for me, baby? It feels like you’re nearly there.”

Gwen could only nod. She moaned loudly as he thrust, faster and faster, his pelvis hitting her clit just enough that it didn’t take long for her to reach her peak.

When her release hit her, she cried out. Jack caught the sound, kissing her, as Gwen’s orgasm swelled and burst. She felt like she was caught in a tidal wave, except it was glorious and warm and she never wanted to return to shore.

In the throes of her own climax, she felt Jack’s cock twitch. He groaned as he came. The sound made Gwen feel powerful. When he collapsed next to her, she felt like she could conquer the world.

Jack pulled her into his arms. Pressing her face against his shoulder, she took in a shuddering breath. She felt like she could either start laughing or crying. Maybe a little bit of both.

“How are feeling?” said Jack, looking into her eyes. His cheeks were still flushed.

Gwen took stock of her body: she felt boneless. Weightless. A sheen of sweat covered her skin, and she was probably flushed from cheeks to chest.

“I feel awesome,” she replied.

Jack kissed her forehead. “Same.”

Sighing happily, Gwen snuggled into his embrace. He was so warm and strong; she wanted to stay with him, in this bed, and never leave it.

“Go to sleep,” Jack murmured. “I’ll watch over you.”