XXIII: This changes everything

《 ASPEN GRISWOLD 》

We never made it to Asheboro, but we found a clubhouse by the outskirts of Uwharrie. Had we not been so worn after the endless hours on our feet, we would have just walked past it. After all, it was the kind of place where people would start looking for food.

Everyone else must have thought the same, as the lock on the door remained intact and there was no sign of breaking in. We got in by mashing one of the square window panels in said door, and I expected it would set off an alarm, but it didn't.

Unlike in most of the buildings, the clubhouse didn't have stagnant air. There was dust on the round tables and at the backs of the chairs, but otherwise the space held an eerie sense of time standing still.

“Look.” Rain breathed, staring at something with wide, wondering eyes. My gaze swept around the room in fear of finding something dangerous from its corners. “It's snowing.”

Indeed, as I lifted my gaze to the windows, big ones that covered most of the front wall, the sky was dusted with snowflakes. Not those heavy ones that floated to the ground with an ease, but the kind that swirled in every other direction. That, plus the impressive lake view we hadn't seen from the other side of the building, made me forget about the inconvenience the snow would be.

That same childlike joy was mirrored in Rain's face, and he gave himself a moment before clearing his throat and clasping his hands together. “Well.. I guess we should get to work.”

There was an industrial kitchen, which we scoured together. We found bread, quite a lot of it, but it was all molded. The industrial sack of rice, three jars of jam, trail mixes and an impressive collection of spices, on the other hand, were more than salvageable. We also found more bottled water than we could carry and Heineken in glass bottles.

We weren't as lucky with winter clothes, as the club was for golfing and had little use off the season. But we collected all the blankets and long sleeved polo shirts we could find.

Our backpacks and tote backs were stuffed to the brim, and I wasn't looking forward to the trek back carrying all of that. There was one thing I was the happiest to have found, but I had to tie the pair of boots to the handle of my backpack, because I couldn't fit them in.

“We’re staying for the night?” I asked Rain, while he rummaged through the food supplies with nuts in them.

He had separated those from the ones we could bring back to the cottage. I was about eighty percent sure I had cured Rio's allergy, but we weren't taking any risks. On a brighter note, eating all the products that contained nuts during our trip meant we didn't have to walk with an empty stomach.

“It's getting dark, so..” Rain finished his sentence with a shrug that translated as: what else can we do? He handed me one of the beers with a lifted brow, and I accepted the bottle.

Even though we had had our near-death experience together and we had called each other friends, we didn't have much to talk about. For the most part, we just walked or sat in an amiable silence. If I asked something, Rain answered, and vice versa, but that was about it. It was fine by me.

Scooping Nutella straight from the jar, snacking on trail mixes and washing it all down with beer was more than fine as well. Soon after the meal Rain dozed off, his neck twisted against the wall in a way that was far from comfortable. I covered my mouth as I yawned so hard my eyes watered, and my eyes fell shut against my notice.

"Aspen."

My eyes flew open. It was dark in the room, so I had slept away for a few hours. It didn't quite sound like Phoenix, as it was so ragged with anguish, but it was him. My heart did a backflip, and I jolted to sit up with my palms pressed over my chest.

“Phoenix?” I called after him.

"Where are you?"

“I told you —"

"I need you, just.. fuck. Fuck.

Can you hear me?"

“Yes, I can!” I exclaimed, making Rain stir and mumble in his sleep. I lowered my voice: “Is something wrong?”

"If you can, haul your ass here ASAP."

I demanded again: “What's going on?”

"I'm losing my mind here.."

Was he being dramatic?

"..and I'm not just being dramatic."

“Phoenix, can you —” I began to ask.

"So, please, please come back."

“Dammit..” I reached for my backpack and tossed everything aside until my fingers closed around the familiar shape of Phoenix's Walkman.

“What's wrong?” Rain muttered. He was rubbing his eyes to shed the remnants of sleep, as I yanked the headphones to my ears. “Is it..?”

“Phoenix.” I told Rain, whose mouth snapped shut and eyebrows furrowed. I had pressed play, but instead of music I could hear a distant humming sound. “Phoenix. Can you hear me?”

My heartbeat drummed in my ears when I waited for an answer, but once there was none, I rushed to promise: “We found food and water, and we’re heading back as fast as we can. Just hold on a little bit longer.”

“I can hear you.” It was so quiet it almost drowned under the hum and the crackle of his magic. I noticed with a pang in my chest that the crackle, the sense of his being, had grown weaker. But maybe it was just the Walkman and the miles between his body in the cottage and mine in the clubhouse. “Thank you.”

It was so much more than a simple thank you; it was relief so profound he was drowning in it; calm after a storm, and also, resignation. Like he was tired and didn't know how much longer he could keep holding on.

“What is it?” Rain twisted his fingers into the fabric of my jacket, eyeing me with ever-growing worry.

“I don't know.” I set the headphones on my lap, and I began to throw my belongings back into my backpack, while explaining: “He asked me where I was, but I thought he already knew. It's not even been more than half a day on his side, so..”

“What else did he say?” Rain prompted me to go on. "Phoenix can be a little drama—”

“No.” I shook my head for emphasis. “He's in trouble. In real trouble.”

“Can you.. I don't know, try to visit his side?” Rain suggested.

“It only works when I'm close to him.” I raked my fingers through my hair. Down here, I was as good as useless. “We need to go back right now.”

Rain studied my face, then glanced out of the windows, while he probed his bad leg through the fabric of his trousers. It was dark outside, but as Rain took a deep inhale and let it out in a long exhale, he said: “Alright.”

We had way too much to carry, the roots were slippery underneath a layer of snow, and my feet still ached from our trek to the clubhouse. Only the ragged edge in Phoenix's pleading kept me putting one foot after another. It kept me pushing against the fatigue, ignoring how the straps of my backpack dug into my shoulders.

Then, in my haste, I stepped on another protruding root and stumbled to my knees. I groaned, cursing out loud, more out of frustration than pain. Rain was panting when he bowed down and offered his clothed hand to me: “You okay?”

“How long is this going to take?” I huffed, ignoring his question. I made no effort to get up, as I stared at the snowy, never-ending woods in front of us, my eyes blurry with tears.

I kept asking myself how half a day could be enough for Phoenix’s psyche to start crumpling. He was strong, stronger than he gave himself credit for being. I couldn't, much less wanted to, think of the things that could have made him so desperate in such a short time. It made no sense. Unless..

I stood up, dusting my knees. If I was right, there was even more of a reason to hurry back. Phoenix had asked where I was, even though I told him where I would be for the following week or two. We had counted that it would mean a day or two on Phoenix's side, but what if we were wrong?

“A day at the very least.” Rain wiped his forehead. His cheeks were ruddy, and his skin gleamed with sweat, despite the cold weather. I too could feel sweat running in rivulets down my sides and the back of my neck, because we were both exhausted and running on fumes. “At some point, we're going to have to rest, so it’ll be closer to two..”

“That's not fast enough.” I groaned.

Rain sighed and lifted his hand to squeeze my shoulder, but he halted halfway. He had been gazing forward, his eyes on something in the distance. Now he was sitting up straighter, his hand still hovering in the air, as his mouth opened to a small o. It reminded me of the bear, and how it had creeped behind my back, almost causing me a heart attack.

“Well.. This changes everything.” Rain said, a wide grin spreading on his lips just as I turned around to see the reason for his awestruck wonder.

Time stood still, and my breath, gasped out in surprise, was the only sound in the night. I had said my quiet farewells to the horses, thinking they had died that day Pierre and the others attacked the cottage. Then again, we never found their corpses, and it made more sense that they had been spooked by the noise and galloped away.

Now two of them had found us again. The chestnut brown stallion with the white stripe on his muzzle, Pegasus, and my black one, Banshee. My mind filled with memories of Phoenix and I riding them, and how his raucous laughter had sounded when he made fun of the name I gave.

“Yes.” I could feel a smile spreading on my lips as I brushed my hand along Banshee’s muzzle. He let out a loud whinny, nuzzling me back. “Yes. This changes everything.”

––––

Hi, so I was thinking of taking a little break from writing during the holidays. It's been quite a year, in good and bad, and now I just really, really need some relaxation and time with my family. Happy holidays!