Not Willing to Pay

RHIANNON

It took a long time, but we eventually ended up at the Tower Suites Reykjavik, a beautifully modern luxury hotel near the water.

We hardly spoke as we waited to be picked up and transported here. I think everyone is mentally overloaded with new information.

My bond with Isaac is both a blessing and a curse. I can feel everything he’s feeling. I can sense his nervousness, his fear that I’ll want to regain my memories and forget about him.

I can also feel his overwhelming love. I can feel that he wants me to do the thing that is best for me, even if that means forgetting our relationship.

I’m sitting on an oversized chair looking out over the water, while Isaac showers, alone. I can feel him pulling away, distancing himself from the heartbreak that might not even come.

I will choose to keep the memories of my current life if given a choice. I want desperately to remember who I am, to remember my life and my past, but not at the expense of him.

He is my future. I made a vow to love him and be the luna of his pack. Regaining my memories wasn’t a part of that deal. My oath was not contingent on whether or not I remember.

I know he’s struggling with his desire to give me everything I want, my past included, and with his need to be with me.

I’m struck suddenly by how completely unfair this is. Why can’t I have my past and my future? Why do I have to give one up to have the other?

I’m a fairy. How am I supposed to deal with this? I’m not even human, but I can’t remember anything about my past that is now much more complicated.

A sob bubbles up in my throat as hot tears streak my face.

I hear the water shut off and the bathroom door jerk open. Isaac is at my side in a second.

“Why are you crying, little mate?” His voice is soft as he kneels beside me.

His wet body is covered only by a towel wrapped around his waist. I start to feel the all too familiar flutters in my stomach.

I scan his muscular body, covered in water droplets. All the arousal I feel crashes as soon as I look at his face.

His honey eyes are rimmed with red. He was definitely crying before. I felt his sadness but I wasn’t expecting this.

Fresh tears spill over my cheeks as I grab at him desperately, pulling his body into mine.

“Isaac, I choose you. I don’t want the memories if it means possibly losing you,” I sob into his neck. “It’s just not fair, I want to remember who I am but not without you.”

He pulls my face back to look in my eyes. He looks hopeful, relieved that I want him and our life together.

After a moment, he crashes his lips into mine. The kiss is wet, desperate, sloppy. We’re both trying frantically to get closer and nothing is good enough.

He pulls me up and takes me to the bed. He lays his body over mine, covering me, pinning me down. It’s still not close enough.

I wrap my legs around him, digging my heels into his lower back, pulling him closer. It’s not close enough.

His tongue massages mine like he’ll die if he stops. We’re both panting and moaning into each other’s mouths. The air surrounding us is sticky and humid.

His tears fall down onto my cheeks and mix with my own as they roll down the sides of my face.

He pulls back from the kiss, and I reach for him desperately. He pulls my pants down and rips my shirt from my body. I quickly yank his towel, causing it to fall open and slide down his legs.

He leans down and reconnects our mouths. He grinds himself against me, causing us both to groan loudly.

“I love you so much,” his raspy voice shakes, his forehead pressed to mine.

“I love you.” I try to push our lips together again, but he pulls away.

“I told you I would help you, I would get you answers. You deserve to remember your life.” He pinches his sad eyes closed.

“I promised you I would keep you safe. He won’t find you again, he won’t hurt you. I will lay down my life to ensure it.”

“Isaac, stop, please. You are my life now, you and our pack. You are my mate, my family, my future. My love for you outweighs any want I have to remember.”

I slam my lips to his, not giving him the option of pulling back.

He runs one hand down the length of my body, stopping at the apex of my thighs. His skillful fingers run through my dripping folds as his body shudders.

“Ready for me?” he whispers before licking down my neck and attaching his lips to my mark.

“Oh my God, yes.” Tingles shoot down my spine as I grip his shoulders, digging my nails into his broad muscled frame.

He pushes into me at a steady pace. A deep, guttural growl pulls from his chest. He pulls his hips back, then snaps them forward, pushing into me hard and fast.

A strangled gasp mixed with a scream catches me off guard. I’m so consumed by pleasure I feel like I’m suffocating.

His pace is brutal, hammering into me so hard and fast that the headboard smashes loudly into the wall, over and over again.

“I-Isaac,” I moan against his neck. Deep within my core, a spring is being wound so tight that I know the snap will be devastating.

“You feel…fuck…you feel so good,” Isaac can hardly speak through his clenched teeth.

The moans falling from my lips are getting so loud that I would be embarrassed if my mind could think of anything other than the knot in my core.

I feel helpless.

I push my hips up, meeting his thrust, and we both scream obscenities into the air.

I feel my peak coming like a tidal wave ready to drown me.

When my legs start to shake, he actually thrusts faster, somehow moving so fast that the headboard sounds like the quick, steady pounding of a hammer against the wall.

I scream, a full-on piercing cry into the room as wave after wave of hedonistic pleasure wracks my body. Each spasm causes me to clench my walls around him tightly.

He leans down, pressing his face into my shoulder as choked moans and grunts fall from his slack, open mouth.

His body shudders, then jerks wildly deep inside me. He grips the sheets so tightly the fabric starts to tear.

“Fuck.” He grinds his hips into me, whining as he spasms again and again.

My legs fall open onto the bed as he tries to catch his breath, barely able to hold himself up from squishing me.

“I... That...” I whisper, my voice thick and hoarse from screaming.

“I came so hard I thought I was dying,” he whispers just as the phone begins to ring.

He moves his head slightly to sit up, but I am able to reach over without getting up. I grab the phone and place it over his face.

“Yes... yes... I apologize... yes, I understand. Goodnight,” he mumbles into the receiver.

As I hang up the phone, I feel his chest shake—he’s laughing.

“That was the front desk. Several people called to complain about ‘raucous noise and screaming.’ We need to keep it down or they’re going to ask us to leave.”

“Oh my God! Isaac!” My face burns red and he laughs again.