Offside: Chapter 54

After a split second of debate, I rolled down the window. “What do you want?”

“Let’s chat.” Luke flashed me a shit-eating grin.

Without hesitation, I unlocked the door. Why not? My day was already fucked. My life was fucked, really. Plus, he’d caught me leaving Kristen’s, so he had the upper hand.

But I had a few tricks up my sleeve too. My phone was still in my palm, so I quickly switched on the voice recording app and set it on the center console, screen down.

Luke pulled open the door and hopped into the passenger seat. The overwhelming stench of his cologne wafted over to me, further amplifying my queasiness. He gave my truck a disdainful once-over. “Very pedestrian choice of vehicle. Fitting.” Leaning over, he handed me a folded piece of white paper.

I snatched it out of his hand. “What the hell is this?”

“You tell me.”

Transcript of video recording

— RECORDING BEGINS —

[music, background noise]

CHASE: Fuck. Hang on. Where’s the lighter?

FEMALE 1: Are you seriously stopping right now? What the hell?

CHASE: Chill out, Nikki. Just let me light this.

[background noise]

[coughing]

FEMALE 1: Oh my god. (coughs) That’s strong.

CHASE: I know. My dealer is the shit.

FEMALE 2: Gonna save some for me?

FEMALE 1: The joint or Chase?

FEMALE 2: (laughs) Both.

CHASE: Don’t worry, I can go all night. Can’t say the same for this spliff.

[laughter, background noise]

— RECORDING ENDS —

Ice ran through my veins. Spelled out like that, the encounter looked even worse. The world tilted around me, and I came closer than ever to emptying the meager contents of my stomach onto the floor of the truck. I’d barely eaten all day, so at least there wouldn’t be much.

And it was still only an excerpt from the video. Even with his apparent digging, Luke hadn’t been able to uncover the whole thing, either.

Gripping the paper, I read the transcript twice more. It was like reading a story about someone else. I wasn’t the person in that video anymore, and I barely remembered that night. When I tried to play it back in my head, it was all a blur. My hangover had lasted for two days after.

“Wonder if Callingwood Daily would want to run a story. Front page, maybe.”

I glanced up, keeping my expression neutral. “Where did you get this?”

“Fell into my lap. Kind of like that skank, Nikki, huh?” He snorted. “Or Female One, I should say.”

“What do you want?” I tossed the transcript onto the console between us.

“My private investigator does good work,” he said, ignoring my question. “I have a copy of the video too, but I’m sure you’ve already seen it.”

At this point, I wondered who hadn’t.

“In case you’re curious,” he added, “I only had to pay Kristen three grand to sell you out. I bet you’re willing to cough up a lot more than that to keep it quiet, huh?”

A hundred times over.

“Get to the point.”

Luke tilted his head and stroked his chin with an arrogant look on his face. “Isn’t Bailey up for a big scholarship package right now? I thought I heard something about an important internship too. Sounds like the kind of thing that could really set her up after graduation.”

My stomach did a nosedive. Bailey was one of five finalists who’d been selected to meet with the scholarship adjudication panel. Penalty Box Online had contacted her references and invited her for another interview on Friday, too. She’d been over the moon about both things all week.

If Luke had managed to track down the video, I guess I shouldn’t have been too surprised he knew other intimate details about not only my life, but Bailey’s.

“What does that have to do with anything?”

He paused and adjusted the collar of his pale yellow polo beneath his jacket. Oppressive silence filled the vehicle while he intentionally delayed, relishing in my fear. I looked at him blankly, refusing to give him the satisfaction of asking again.

“That video is interesting, you know. Female Two is off-camera the whole time. It would be a shame if people thought that voice belonged to Bailey.” Luke gave me a pitying look. “Making sex tapes with her boyfriend could really hurt her chances of landing those opportunities. Would hurt her future career prospects too.”

Panic gripped me by the throat, putting me in a chokehold. It took every ounce of strength I had to keep my voice level. “You know damn well that voice doesn’t belong to Bailey. I didn’t even know her then. And she was still dating you.”

Luke shrugged. “Good luck proving that. There’s no time stamp shown on that video. She’s with you now, and she’ll be guilty by association. And once the rumor gets out, they’ll always believe it on some level.”

Regret churned in my stomach. All this time, I’d worried about shielding her from Luke, but I was the one she needed protection from. Guilty by association because of me and my choices. About to pay the price for something I did before I even knew her. Something done to me.

“Again, what the fuck do you want? I know it isn’t cash.”

“End it.”

The words stabbed me in the gut like a rusty blade.

“What?” I should have been expecting it, but a small, desperate part of me hoped for something else. Anything else.

His blue eyes held mine, cold with malice. “Did I stutter?”

“She’ll never get back together with you.” My pulse roared in my ears. “This is about control. You don’t even love her. If you did, you wouldn’t do this.”

He waved me off. “We could play armchair psychologist all day. It doesn’t matter. Question is, are you willing to blow up her life?”

The knife in my gut twisted and tore me apart from the inside, disemboweling me all over the inside of my truck. It killed me to think of Bailey losing out on something she clearly deserved. But it devastated me to think of losing her.

Luke held her future in his hands and he knew it.

I needed the other half of the video, the part where I’d gotten mad and called Kristen by her name. If nothing else, it would exonerate Bailey. Stewart’s PI would start digging, but who knew how long it would take to find it—if he found it at all? But then what? Leak it myself to prove it wasn’t Bailey? Even if I did locate it, the solutions were all shitty.

“Why would you do that to Bailey?” I asked, desperately searching for a shred of humanity hidden deep within him. “And Nikki?”

I could deal with the fallout in my own life, but the collateral damage in this scenario was criminal. The guilt I was feeling was off the fucking charts.

Luke scoffed. “Who gives a fuck about Nikki? As far as Bailey goes, if you make the right call, I won’t.”

“If I say no?” I asked hoarsely.

“I’ll make sure that a search for her name will imply she directs amateur porn. Potential employers, prospective boyfriends—because let’s face it, we know you two won’t last—even the teachers of her future children.” He leaned back, leisurely placing an ankle over his knee like we were old pals shooting the breeze.

Denial seized hold of my brain. “That can be scrubbed.”

“Not fully.” Luke smirked, his tone even more condescending than usual. “The internet never forgets, Carter.”

Neither did I. Somehow, I’d get even for this. But first I had to stop my life from imploding. Or minimize the damage, at least.

Morrison was nothing if not a coward, so I changed tactics. “You realize blackmail is a crime, right? A felony, in fact.”

“Eh. I’m not concerned about that.”

Holy fuck, he’d lost his mind.

“Why not?” I snapped. “You think your lawyer parents will bail you out?” I ran the risk of provoking him, but I was filled with so much rage, I could barely contain myself.

Luke remained eerily calm like the psychopath he was. “Speaking of parents, have you met Bailey’s? Lovely people.” He frowned, studying me with disapproval. “Not sure they’ll say the same about you if this video makes its way into their hands.”

“Are you willing to risk jail to take me down?” I spat out. “I could call the cops right now.”

“You can’t be stupid enough to think I have the only copy. If you do that, it blows up immediately. Putting me in jail won’t fix her reputation. Are you willing to gamble with her future?”

The answer was no—and he knew it. At least I now had his threats on tape. Problem was that wouldn’t stop him from going nuclear on Bailey’s entire life first.

“If you drag Bailey into this, jail will be the least of your concerns. I won’t have anything left to lose.”

Despite my violent fantasies about Morrison, I’d never seriously contemplated killing him. Until now.

“Oh, I don’t know about that. You have lots of other things on the line. Deluca and I have been chatting lately. Maybe he would be interested in seeing your film debut.”

“Go ahead,” I ground out. Tom Deluca was part of Los Angeles’s management team, and I spoke to him regularly too. “Do that and leave Bailey out of this.”

“Nah.”

I gripped the steering wheel, my knuckles turning white. “Why not? It’s me you want to punish.”

“You ruined my life.” He sneered.

Presumably, he was referring to the backlash against him after the last game. He’d never owned up to a thing in his entire miserable existence; that sure as hell wouldn’t change now. “It’s only fair I return the favor.”

“You ruined your own life.”

Luke barked a caustic laugh. “I could say the same for you.”

He wasn’t wrong, though I never consented to that fucking video in the first place.

“Anyway.” Luke feigned a yawn, shifting his weight. “I’ve drafted a detailed email to everyone Bailey knows, complete with video attached. Break it off, or I’m hitting send.”

Heartache rocked through me like never before, mingled with pure, unmitigated rage. My brain went into lizard mode, rendering me speechless.

“Other people have copies, so don’t try anything cute. And don’t even think about trying to fake a breakup and pull one over on me. I have eyes everywhere,” he said. “That’s how I found you here.”

My heart wrenched as I forced out the words. “If I agree, will you leave her alone?”

“I will.” He opened the door and slid out but lingered. “You have twenty-four hours to do it.”

I glanced away from the article I was working on, checking the time in the bottom corner of the laptop screen. Chase was over half an hour late. It was out of character for him not to text to let me know, but he’d been acting strange for the past two days. Distant and despondent, not like his usual self. No flirty or sexy texts, either, which we usually exchanged multiple times a day.

When I’d texted to ask him what was wrong, he’d shut me down completely. I could only assume he was stewing over his three-game suspension. He seemed to take it in stride at the time, but I could tell being benched really bothered him. Especially when they’d lost their last game in a brutal defeat.

Still, I couldn’t shake the feeling that something else was going on.

Unease settled in my gut, and I returned my attention to my write-up about the school’s art fair. From beside me on my desk, my phone vibrated and lit up with a new text.

A photo attachment followed. Fear creeped in as I dragged my fingers across the screen, zooming in. It was Chase on the porch of a green house. The door was open, and Kristen was standing in the doorway.

No.

A familiar form of agony settled in: betrayal. Just like with Luke. Learning about this from him was beyond ironic, like everything was coming full circle. My mind backpedaled, frantically searching for a reasonable explanation. Maybe the picture was old, from before. But then why would Luke even have it?

From inside my bedroom, I heard Shiv answer the door and let Chase in. When he crossed the threshold into my room, his posture was stiff, and his eyes were haunted. He even looked guilty.

“Hi.” He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans, leaning against the doorframe.

More alarm bells went off in my head when he didn’t come close and give me a hug or kiss hello.

“Where were you earlier?” I was too upset to be strategic about how I approached what was going on, and his standoffish behavior was only causing me further panic.

“Practice,” he said. “Look, we need to—”

My heart sank. Strike one. He lied.

I cut him off, giving him a sharp look. “You sure about that?”

“What do you mean?” Chase frowned, but guilt swam in his eyes.

“Did you make any other stops along the way?”

Please tell me the truth. Please own up to it.

“I had to do a few things, yeah.”

Pushing my desk chair back, I stood, watching his face carefully. My pulse revved. “Was Kristen one of them?”

Chase broke eye contact and looked at the floor, shaking his head. Almost inaudibly, he muttered, “Of course.”

“What the hell is going on, Carter?”

There had to be an explanation for this. There had to be a good reason he was there, and he was going to tell me what it was. I trusted him. I believed in him.

He looked back up at me with so much anguish in his eyes that tears welled up in my own. “Nothing happened with her. I swear.”

Yeah, I’d heard that line before—a few too many times. But never from him. None of this made sense.

And the worst part was that it felt like he was telling the truth.

I sucked in a jagged breath and sank my teeth into my bottom lip to stop myself from crying. “Then why were you there?”

“I—” He faltered, shaking his head. “Can’t.”

My voice cracked. “Please tell me. I want the truth.”

This was not happening. Could not be happening. This was the guy who’d been there for me unconditionally, even when I pushed him away. Who’d been nothing but patient and kind and—most of all—honest with me. Sometimes brutally so.

“No,” he said more firmly. A flicker of his usual self-assured demeanor appeared, but it disappeared almost as quickly. “I haven’t even looked at anyone else since I met you. I think you know that.”

“I thought I did too, but I need an alternate explanation.”

I took a step, followed by another, and drew closer to him until we were within arm’s reach. His jaw ticked as he watched me, but he didn’t move. Neither of us moved. I searched his face, probing, like I might see into his brain if I tried hard enough.

“I need you to trust me, James.” The muscles in his neck were strained, his voice matching.

A strangled sob escaped from the back of my throat. “How can I trust you when you won’t give me an answer?”

“I love you more than anything in this world, but I can’t give you that.” His eyes held mine, pained but unreadable. “And we can’t…” He let out a heavy sigh. “I can’t be with you right now.”

My world shattered at my feet.

“What?” I shuffled back, putting space between us like it would somehow protect my heart. “How can you—how can you say you love me and then turn around and do this? You don’t want to be with me anymore? Just like that?”

Chase started to reach for me and caught himself, dropping his hands to his sides. He balled his hands into fists, flexing and releasing. “That’s not—I want to be with you more than I want anything.”

“Right,” I retorted angrily. “Except you’re choosing not to.” An ache erupted in my chest, so consuming that I thought I might literally be having a heart attack. I loved him. He loved me. I knew both of those things to be true, so how could this be happening?

It was like learning everything I thought to be true was a lie.

“I’m sorry,” he said. “This is what’s best.”

I opened my mouth to respond, but the words didn’t appear. We stared at each other, bathed in unspoken words and unanswered questions. The silence stretched on and on while my heart bled out on the bedroom floor, one beat at a time.

Finally, he cleared his throat. “I should go.”

With another pained look, he turned and started for my bedroom door. Still frozen to the spot with disbelief, I watched him disappear into the hall. Moments later, the sound of the front door shutting quietly behind him followed.

Tears erupted in earnest, accompanied by huge, gulping sobs. I couldn’t stop the tears, couldn’t catch my breath, couldn’t make sense of what Chase had said. Everything we had was gone. And I still didn’t understand why.

“Bailey?” Shiv called. “Are you okay?”

“No.”

Seconds later, she stepped into my room. When she caught sight of me, she rushed over and threw her arms around me. “What happened?”

My voice cracked. “I don’t know.”