27. Fire

I look at the gun in my trembling hand. And I decide for myself that I won't just let him get away with this. I came here for answers and I'm getting them one way or another.

I wipe my tears.

Aron comes into the living room and sees me with the gun.

"What the hell are you doing?!" He screams horrified.

He rushes to my side.

I aim it at the door and just then, Neil comes in.

He's got a black eye and a bloody lip.

He freezes as he looks at the gun pointed at him.

"Sky.." He says slowly. With that fake kind voice of him.

"Shut up!" I scream.

He flinches.

"Sky, you're not going to do this." He tries to manipulate me. He thinks he still owns me and I refuse it.

I've never fired a gun before so I could be doing it all wrong and getting myself hurt but I fire anyway. A loud bang fills the otherwise quiet room.

Neil screams, terrified.

The bullet hit the little desk beside him.

I point the gun at him again.

"Sky, you don't wanna do this—"

I ignore Aron.

"You're gonna listen to me now. And you're gonna answer every question I ask you. Understood?"

Neil nods frantically.

And I feel good. The power I lost comes back to me with every shiver of his.

"Why?" I demand. "Why did you do all that stuff to me? Why do you still?" Tears fill my eyes again but I refuse to acknowledge them.

I'M STRONG I repeat to myself.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

A veil of anger covers my eyes and I'm about to shoot but Aron pulls me back.

"SKY!"

"WHAT?!" I scream at him.

He's quiet.

I look at Neil again.

"I'm talking about all those years you raped a kid!" I scream.

"Don't tell me you don't remember! TELL ME THE TRUTH!"

He just looks at me shocked, his mouth open but no words leaving them.

"ANSWER ME!" I roar.

He flinches again.

"I.. I don't know." He stammers.

"Don't give me that bullshit! You do know! TELL ME!" I scream louder than I ever have. It's as if all the years of terror are bleeding out of me now. And I can't hold back.

He nods insanely.

"I.. like it, okay?" He says quietly. More to himself than to us.

I frown confused. I wonder if I heard him correctly.

"Everyone likes something. This is what I like. There are so many things that used to be taboo that are accepted now like.. gays, interracial people. Why can't this be?"

I lower my gun in horror. Is this really how he thinks?

He smiles to himself.

"You were so small. Pure. Even though you didn't know it. How precious young people are. Its something that you never get back. Youth." He keeps his eyes on the ground.

I feel the hairs on my arms stand up in disgust.

"I.. you—" I stammer, unable to even understand.

"Do you know how much you hurt me? Do you know I still get nightmares about you? I can't even be with my boyfriend" I point at Aron.

"He's your boyfriend?" Neil mumbles.

"Because I always have your fucking face in my mind? I wake up screaming, gasping for air. I get panic attacks. I can barely connect with anyone. You wanna compare that to a sexuality? You ruined me!" I scream.

"Look, every relationship comes with it's ups and downs—"

"Ups and downs?!" I feel myself get sick with rage and I point the gun at him again.

I'm ready to fucking shoot him but I don't have all my answers yet.

"Were there others?" My voice trembles with anger.

Neil looks away for a moment.

"Yes."

A tear streams down my face.

"How many?" I ask, trying to stay calm so I can talk.

He looks at me again. And I know that that look is going to follow me into my nightmares from now on.

It's the look of insanity.

"Some after you... before you..."

"How many?" I demand but I can feel my knees get weak as he looks straight at me, terrifying me.

Then he grins. "But trust me, no one compares to you."

And I snap. I can't fight for him to answer me anymore. Red anger covers my eyes and I can't see anything but the man I want dead.

I step forward, ready to pull the trigger.

"You fucking—"

Aron steps in front of the gun.

"Oliver, you don't want to do this—"

"Get out of the way, Aron." I growl. My voice trembling with rage.

"It's going to hurt you more than it'll hurt him, trust me. I'd know!" He says, despair in his eyes.

"Don't you think he deserves to die? After all those fucking kids he raped!" I scream. "Step aside!"

"Sky.." Aron pleads. "Don't do this." His eyes are sincere and sad and worried.

And the haze of anger disappears and I see myself from the outside. I see that I'm pointing a gun at the person I love the most.

"Please, don't do this.." He pleads, his eyes wet.

And I recognize the words. For I've pleaded them over and over again just a few minutes ago.

I lower the gun and Aron takes it from me.

I'm shaking and I can barely stand.

I look at Aron and my eyes beg for him to take me away from here.

He grabs my hand and pulls me to the exit.

Aron opens the door and I stand in the sunlight.

I look at Neil one last time and walk out.

***

No one said a word on the way to the hotel. Neither of us knew what to say. Neither of us wanted to say the wrong thing.

We're sat on the bed. Staring ahead of us.

I feel so terrible. In that haze of anger..

"I almost shot you." I whisper.

He looks at me. Surprised I broke the silence.

"You didn't, though."

"Doesn't matter."

Tears fill my eyes and I curl up in a ball as they stream down my face. I wince in pain. My heart hurts. I'm devastated.

Aron wraps his arms around me and pulls me to him.

"I was so scared.." I cry.

He holds me tight.

"I thought he was gonna.. If you hadn't shown up.."

I hear sniffing from above me. Aron's crying too.

"I was so fucking stupid! I thought he'd changed. It's my fault!" I yell.

"It's not! Okay? It's not your fault! He manipulated you! He took advantage of you and you're not to blame for that!" Aron screams.

I cry harder because I don't believe it. The voice in my head keeps blaming me.

"Look at me!" Aron makes me look at him.

"It's not your fault. You're strong. You did what you set out to do. You got your answers. And you told him your story. You did the right thing."

"I almost shot you in the process." I say darkly as I look away.

"But you didn't. You didn't shoot me. Because you're strong. Stronger than him."

I look at him.

Arons wipes away my tears.

"How did you get over there so fast?" I ask quietly, staring into his eyes.

"I.. never left." He chuckles.

I frown.

"I waited outside, like you wanted. But I never left that fucking hill."

I stare at him incredulously.

"Te quiero," I say as I rest my head on his shoulder.

"Te quiero." He says as he rubs my back. His low voice is like a blanket that wraps around me and comforts me.

I don't deserve him.

He's too amazing.

I sigh as I calm down in his warmth.

I kiss his collarbone and I fall asleep in his arms.