After Killian left West's house, he walked over to the rich side of town to see Harper. He hoped that he'd be willing to talk with him about everything that had went down between the two of them.
He wasn't sure who was on the other side of the door when he got there, so he took several deep breaths before ringing the doorbell, just in case it was actually Harper.
"Killian, come in."
Thankfully, The Graham's helper answered the door. She led Killian into the reception area in which he immediately plopped down onto an expensive looking sofa that wasn't there the last time he'd visited the house. Part of him wished she'd say that Harper was out, but he knew he couldn't avoid the topic any longer.
"Would you like something to drink?" She offered politely.
"No, thank you." He smiled, "Is Harper here?"
"He's in his room. He's always in his room."
"Incorrect!" A voice suddenly hollered from the other side of the room.
"I am actually walking down the stairs."
Harper gave Ms Rose a wink when he got to the reception area, and Killian a nod to acknowledge his presence.
He then slipped into the kitchen and headed straight for the fridge to get out a Red Bull for the umpteenth time that day.
His hand was about to grab a can when Rose appeared behind him.
"You need another energy drink, don't you?"
"Wow, you know me so well, Rose." Harper replied sarcastically before grabbing a bottle of Fiji Water instead. He closed the fridge then turned around before waving the plastic bottle in front of a frowning Ms Rose's face. "Water."
"Your organs are thanking you right now."
Harper rolled his eyes, then walked around Ms Rose. She'd been with his family ever since he could remember, she was like his second mother. She was his live in nanny before she started helping around the house, though, and she only started helping because Harper practically cried for a week straight when she took a job to take care of younger kids in another town. Harper was 15.
Killian was still seated on the extremely comfortable sofa when he headed into the reception area again, Harper gave him a once-over, then gestured with his head for Killian to follow him up the stairs.
A pungent smell hung in the air when they walked into Harper's room. It smelled like rotting junk food, dirty underwear and wet dog. Killian immediately covered his nose with one hand to block it out but it was too strong, none of the windows were open either. This was extremely out of character, Harper was the biggest germaphobe Killian knew. It made him wonder how bad things truly were for his friend.
"God, what is that smell?"
"My dying soul." Harper deadpanned, which made Killian look at him worriedly.
"Relax, I'm kidding. I'm pretty sure something died in here, though. A rat, probably."
"Harper, that's disgusting. We're cleaning this room right now."
"You are." Harper grimaced. "I'm not touching anything on this floor, that's gross." He threw the bottled water ontop of the bed then resumed packing his clothes; which was what he was doing before he got thirsty.
"Going on holiday, or something?" Killian inquired. He walked over to the other side of the room and pushed open the sliding doors to let some fresh air in.
"Nah, moving to Florida."
"What? You can't... do that..."
Harper's response was as casual as if someone had just asked him what his favorite color was. Killian hadn't expected that, the last time he checked, they were both staying in Maryland.
"Well," Harper shrugged. "I have to. My Dad enrolled me at The University of Florida. It'll be a relief to get as far away as I can from this place, if you ask me."
"You're leaving today?"
"In a month, just felt like packing everything up today. What about you? You receive that scholarship yet?"
Killian's eyes lowered to the ground as he remembered the hard decision he had to make on his own, it was one thing that he hadn't talked about with anyone. "I rejected it." He responded softly.
"The hell?" Harper exclaimed, he forcefully zipped up his suitcase then put his hands on his hips before staring at Killian in disbelief. "Are you insane?"
"Maybe. But my mom still hasn't found work, if I leave then my siblings will most definitely starve to death."
Harper did not agree with the way Killian was handling things, and he hated how irresponsible Linda was, if she cared about her kids' welfare at all, she would've found a way to make ends meet instead of lazying around the house, making her eldest child do all the work.
"You can work, and go to school, you know that? You did it this year."
Killian shook his head in disagreement, he knew he wouldn't be able to deal with that kind of pressure. Plus, he was never good at multitasking, he only survived working while doing senior year cause he was practically done with most of the year. "That's different, college is a different ball game. I'll probably be up to my neck in school work then."
"Hmm." Harper nodded, deciding to let the matter go. When things got quiet, his eyes awkwardly started wandering around the room as if he was seeing everything for the first time. He knew Killian didn't come over to talk about college, they never talked about school even when they were still friends. It made him wonder what he was there for.
"So, uh... I just... came over here to apologize, man. I've been kind of a bitch lately."
Oh... that's what.
"No, you just did what you felt was right. I can't hold that against you. I was kind of a bitch, too." Harper admitted.
He could try and blame the alcohol for his mistakes but truth is, he knew what he did, what he said, to Killian was wrong and completely uncalled for, especially after Killian had just gotten him out of a tight situation, that night was proof that his best friend would've done anything for him, and instead of thanking him like any normal person would, he acted like a complete jerk and almost destroyed their friendship.
"It never felt right, though. I was just... really hurt, you know? And in turn, I ended up hurting you."
"People fight all the time. What's the human race without a little conflict? That's what Steve Rogers said."
There he goes again, trying to relate real life problems with things that happen in the marvel cinematic universe. That's why I love him, though.
"What does Captain America have to do with his, Harper?"
"You know." He countered with a roll of his eyes, "Cause he sort of started Civil War."
Killian only nodded at Harper's comparison to their fight with Civil War, his best friend was The King of exaggerations.
"We both made some mistakes, I thought I could live with mine, but... it was hard. I just couldn't pretend I was fine with the way things were anymore.
Do you think we could forget everything and start over? You're my brother, and I love you. Pro homo... since you know, you're--"
"Nope, not gay. And I'm pretty sure it's yes, homo."
"That doesn't make any sense."
"Well, I don't care." Harper pouted. He cleared the clutter on his bed with one sweep of a hand and it landed on the floor, piling up on top of a pizza box which still had a few slices of inedible pizza in it, and was undoubtedly the one creating the putrid smell that wafted across the room.
"Come sit with me."
Killian grimaced, how Harper managed to live in such unsanitary conditions was beyond him. "Harper, we need to clean this room."
"Fine, fine! After this movie, though."
He switched on the flat screen mounted on the wall before scrolling through Netflix's library.
"Please, no. We've watched it two hundred times, already." Killian groaned as Harper stopped on the movie that they'd just briefly mentioned. His best friend only winked at him before patting the space right next to him on his bed.
"Let's break that record and make it two hundred and one, then."
--------
That same night, West finally headed downstairs after being cooped up in his room, or rather, stalling for hours, to talk to Paul about Simon. He could hear his dad arguing with the TV as he walked down the stairs. He expected his Dad's favorite show to be on, but it looked like Paul was trying out new things; Indian dramas, and it looked like they were just as addicting as the Korean ones. He'd also replaced his usual buttery popcorn with Greek salad and mint tea. He had been making healthier choices lately.
"Something came for you in the mail." Paul said as he pointed to a dust covered envelope resting on the coffee table next to his tea. "Looks like it's been sitting in there for quite a while. When last did you check it?"
"On the day of my birth." West answered. He snatched the envelope off the table without looking at it before sinking into the couch. "What is it?"
"It's a letter from University of Michigan."
"What? Really?" West inadvertently yelled. He sat up straight, then ripped the envelope open, tearing the letter in half in the process.
"Dear Mr Rickert, Congratulations and welcome! I am delighted to inform you of your admission to The University of Michigan for Fall semester 2018..."
He grabbed the other half of the letter, then continued reading silently as Paul watched intently.
"Fuck me. They say they'll cover ten percent of my tuition, too. They must've liked my audition..."
"That's... wow... uh, what audition was that?"
Paul was never involved in the process of applying to different colleges. He didn't even know what career path his son had chosen. He vaguely remembered signing some forms, though. But that was months ago, anything that went back further than three months was lost to him. It was like someone else was living his life for him. He made a promise to himself to be involved in every important aspect of West's life from that moment.
"Well..." He faltered. "I- It's a music degree. "
West wasn't sure he'd ever get rid of the voice in the back of his head. The voice that told him to keep every little thing to himself, especially if it involved his music, in fear of his dad's disapproval. There were still times when he'd wake up in the morning and think that the past few months had been a dream, but the smell of burnt toast in the air always managed to snap him out of his panic, and reassure him that it was real- that his Dad was never going to hurt him ever again. (And that he needed cooking lessons.)
"A Bachelor of Music in Composition, to be specific." He continued. "I auditioned via Skype... I sang."
"Wow... that's-- that's amazing, Weston."
"Really? I mean-- You don't... mind?"
"Why would I? You're going to do great!"
West, on the verge of tears, latched onto his dad's shoulders and engulfed him into a bone crushing hug. Music was his dream, and to have Paul support him in pursuing it was more than he could ask for. "Thank you, Dad." He sniffled.
"I'll be honest, I didn't think you'd be going out of state..." Paul confessed after they'd pulled apart.
"For the longest time, I just wanted to be far away from here... far away from the people in this town, the rumors, and..."
"Me." Paul finished off.
Deep down he knew he was the real reason for West's wanting to leave.
He only started drinking as a way to cope with the grief, but before he knew it, he couldn't go a single day without drinking. That simple action, that simple decision to pick up a beer bottle was the worst he'd ever made. It almost cost him his family, and most of all, his life.
He wished he could've found a better way to cope, like gardening or perhaps a pottery class. He wished he could've raised West better, he wished he could take back all he did and said, but as always, wishing was pointless. The best that he could do now, was to support West's every decision and to be a better father than he ever was.
"Yes." West nodded. "I didn't think I had a choice."
"Do you still want to leave?"
"I do. This place isn't good for me, Dad. I have to do what's best for me, for once."
"Well, you're starting in a month," Paul said as he patted his pockets in search of his phone. "So we're gonna have to start looking for an apartment for you to stay, your tuition is covered, so no need to worry about that."
He scrolled through his phone, looking for his financial advisor's contact number. He hoped it still worked, he hadn't been in contact with her in years. Paul tried dialing the number, but it sent him straight to voicemail, he guessed it was because it was already after hours, so he put his phone away.
He had opened an account with their local bank a couple of years ago for West's schooling, what's great about it was that it was one that he couldn't access for a certain number of years, so the amount he'd left in there had been building up, he also deposited money into it whenever he could. The money in the account was enough for almost five years tuition.
"Who were you calling?"
"My financial advisor, have to pay your tuition before you start."
"What?" A wide eyed West bellowed. "You don't have to do that, I have money."
Not enough to pay for three years tuition, but I have money.
"What are you talking about? I've been saving for your college studies ever since 1st grade. You don't have to take out a cent."
The only thing I did right.
"Dad... Thank you."
Paul extended his arm to ruffle West's dark hair like he used to do when he was younger, "I'm proud of you, Son." He expressed genuinely. "Jennifer would be, too."
West noticed that for the first time ever, Paul had said Jennifer's name without flinching or closing into himself. He wondered if Regina had anything to do with it, but at that moment, all that was on his mind was Jennifer, once her name was mentioned, it was always hard to get his mind to think about anything else.
"What was she like? My Mother?"
Paul leaned forward on the couch before clenching, and unclenching his fists, this was a difficult topic for him. West was pretty sure his Dad was going to tell him the same old story he'd heard for years, but surprisingly, he actually started talking.
"She was the best friend I'd ever had. She approached Dennis and I on our first day at Easton High, said she'd never been friends with twins before... She practically forced us into friendship.
Not that I minded, I liked her the second I met her. Dennis, however...
She was also a total nerd, she lived for Batman and The Joker comics. This one time, Linda got her a Detective Comics shirt and she literally wore it everyday for 2 weeks straight, pretty sure she slept in it, too. Linda ended up stealing it from her bedroom, to this day she denies having anything to do with the missing shirt, but I know she still has it... locked away somewhere."
The look on Paul's face was one of pure nostalgia. He hadn't told West about his mother in fear of the feelings it'd revive; grief, because he missed her so much. Anger, because she was taken too soon from her loved ones' lives. But all he felt right then was joy, she may have left the world a little before her time, but the impact she made in Paul's life was Great. He didn't know what love was until he met her. In a way she was still there, she was a part of West.
And that fact was the reason why Paul was able to love West so deeply, like he was his own son.
"And she cared for others, even when they didn't deserve it, you inherited that quality. I was also... in love with her. But I was too much of a coward to let her know."
Jennifer died before Paul could reveal his true feelings. Her death was sudden and very unexpected. Naturally, after delivering a baby, the uterus contracts and pushes out the placenta. In Jennifer's case, small pieces of the placenta were left attached to her uterus which caused excessive bleeding, then later lead to shock, and finally, death.
"Do you think she felt the same way?"
"She told me every day how much she loved me. But it was only as a friend. I knew how much she loved Simon, though. Those two were inseparable."
"Does he even know about me?" West asked as he remembered what he originally came downstairs for.
"No. Your mother wanted it that way."
West furrowed his brows in confusion, "You just said they were inseparable."
"They were... It was just... complicated."
"Then un-complicate it."
Paul was about to protest, but the determined look on West's face told him that they'd be on the couch the entire night if he didn't spill the beans.
"Simon had lived in the children's home in Downtown Cambridge his whole life, your mother started volunteering over there when she was about 13, I think. That's how they met." He stated after a heavy sigh.
"How old was Simon?"
"12. They were just kids, really. They started off as friends, but it later developed into something more, 3 years later, some folks from London finally adopted Simon... I still remember how happy he was to finally get out of that place, to finally have a family. So he said his goodbyes to Jennifer, and left. She found out she was pregnant about a month later and uh, I guess she wanted to keep you a secret cause she was scared his new family would've kick him out. He was only 15, she believed he deserved a chance at a happy life, a chance to have parents.
No one else knew about her pregnancy except our friend group, and her parents... who later kicked her out because she wouldn't 'Take care of the problem'..."
West immediately understood what the last part meant. "Abort me..." He muttered softly.
A couple of months ago, he probably would've preferred to have been aborted, but he had so much to live for now. Himself, His music, His Dad, and most importantly, Killian.
"Yes. If you were wondering how you ended up in my care, it's because my Uncle took her in, too. So when you were born, I just... couldn't find the strength to give you up. One thing I know, though," Paul added whilst reaching for West's hand.
"Is that your parents loved one another. I witnessed it first hand, you might've been unplanned but you were definitely not a mistake. You are Love."
West felt a tiny smile slip past his lips, knowing that his birth parents held so much love for each other put him at ease. It made him feel wanted and loved by them, too - even though they'd never met. "Thank you. For telling me."
"I suppose I knew this day would come... you asking 'bout your birth parents. I mean, you've been asking, but I always managed to redirect everything. I wasn't ready to lose you, still aren't. But I can't postpone the inevitable, or stop you from looking for your father."
"What you talking about? You're my Dad. I'm not going anywhere, anytime soon. Well, I am leaving," He admitted "But... not forever."
He gave his Dad a playful nudge before breaking out into the biggest grin Paul had ever seen.
"I'll talk to Dennis. Maybe one of his friends from the station can look Simon up on their database. We'll find him."
"I appreciate that."
It was a bittersweet moment for Paul, on one hand he was glad that his son finally knew the truth, and on the other, he was scared of what these new revelations meant. He was truly afraid of losing West but alas, he smiled.
"Anything for you, son. Anything for you."
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