Chapter 8: Quotes

SLOAN

I flip on ~Clueless~ and settle on the couch next to Kade.

“Isn’t this, like, the world’s most quotable movie?” he says, chuckling.

“I think it might be a toss-up between this and ~Mean Girls~.”

~“I’m, like, totally buggin’,”~ he chuckles.

I laugh. ~“You’re a virgin that can’t drive.”~

~“Ugh, as if!”~ Kade makes an expression of mock-surprise. ~“He’s a disco-dancing, Oscar Wilde-reading, Streisand ticket-holding friend of Dorothy, know what I’m saying?”~

~“So, OK, I don’t want to be a traitor to my generation and all, but I don’t get how guys dress today.~

~“I mean, come on, it looks like they just fell out of bed and put on some baggy pants and take their greasy hair and cover it up with a backward cap, and, like, we’re expected to swoon?~

~“I don’t think so.”~

“Whoa, Sloan, that was commitment.”

~“Rollin’ with the homies,”~ I sing as I wave my hand in the air; Kade joins in and starts to wave his hand along with mine.

~“I feel like such a bonehead,”~ he says, laughing.

~“Where’s my white collarless shirt from Fred Segal? It’s my most capable-looking outfit!”~

~“Phat.”~

I giggle. “Holy shit, Kade. You bested me with ~Clueless~ quotes.”

“I’m not sure; you got out that big long one.”

“All right,”—I pause the movie—“it’s time to put your skills to the test.”

He smirks. “Bring it on; I have two little sisters.”

~“It’s not my fault you’re, like, in love with me or something!”~

“Whoa, low blow,” he laughs, ~“I’m sorry that people are so jealous of me. But I can’t help it that I’m popular.”~

~“Get in loser, we’re going shopping.”~

~“It’s like I have ESPN or something. My breasts can always tell when it’s going to rain.”~ Kade cups his pecs.

“Kade!” I say, laughing. ~“Is butter a carb?”~

~“But you’re, like, really pretty… So you agree? You think you’re really pretty?”~

~“Whatever, I’m getting cheese fries.”~

~“Four for you, Glenn Coco! You go, Glenn Coco!”~

~“The limit does not exist.”~ I laugh. “Shit, Kade, you’re really testing me.”

He chuckles. ~“I’m a mouse. Duh!”~

~“I can’t go out tonight, ah-heh, ah-heh, I’m sick.”~

~“One time, she punched me in the face. It was awesome.”~

We both descend into giggles, and my head naturally falls into his lap.

“Kade? Do you need to go home?”

“No, not a chance,” he smiles and starts to stroke my hair.

“That feels so nice.”

“I love touching you.”

“Kade.”

“I know, I mean it in a purely platonic way.” He lets out some nervous laughter.

“Archie never hangs out with me like this,” I admit.

“Then he’s a dumbass; you’re easily the most fun person I’ve ever been around. I’ll hang out with you every night that you let me.”

“What?” I gasp.

“I know what I am to you, and you know what? It’s enough for me,” he says assuredly.

“I probably shouldn’t say this, but I have been rethinking things about Archie since I met you,” I admit.

“So, I might have a chance?”

“I don’t know if I’m ready to say that, but you have shown me a new light. You’re amazing, incredibly fun, and handsome as hell.

“Don’t waste your time on me. You deserve so much more than I can give right now.”

“I’m patient,” he insists.

“Kade.”

“Sloan, give it up. You’re a catch, and as long as you let me be your friend, I’ll wait for you to realize it.”

“I want to say something but I’m drunk and I shouldn’t,” I admit.

“What if I promise not to act on it?”

I extend a pinky to him, and we pinky swear, so I say, “I want to kiss you.”

“Sloan,” he groans.

“Hey, you said…”

“I know what I said but I didn’t expect you to come out with that,” he admits.

“I’m sorry, Kade, I must seem like a total asshole to you.”

“No, actually, I see you quite clearly. You’re kind of trapped, and if you choose to stay with him, I need to duck out. I’m the asshole intruding in your relationship.”

“You’re not an asshole. Tonight has been the most freeing, fun night of my life.”

He smiles softly. “Sloan, you can’t say shit like that to me.”

“Why?”

“Because it gives me hope.”

“I’m sorry, Kade, I’m not trying to hurt you.”

“I know. Let’s watch a movie.”

I sit up next to him, and he puts on ~Son in Law.~

The last thing I remember before I fall asleep is Pauly Shore dancing around singing ~“Steven Tyler PJs.”~

***

When I wake up the next morning, I’m surprised to feel Kade’s scruffy cheek against mine. It seems I fell asleep on his shoulder. I try to escape without waking him, but it doesn’t work; he stirs.

“Sloan, you okay?” he says in an adorable, sleepy tone.

“I am. Thanks for being my pillow.”

“My pleasure.”

When I stand up, the hangover hits me like a ton of bricks. “Oh, ow!”

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“My head feels like it’s going to explode. I need food,” I admit.

He chuckles. “Yeah, we really tied one on last night, huh?”

“It was fun, I can’t believe you know all those quotes.”

“I can’t believe you got a tattoo.”

I look down at my wrist and realize I didn’t take care of it last night. “Shit, wasn’t I supposed to wash it or something?”

“Yeah, come on, I’ll help you.”

Kade follows me to the bathroom and unwraps my tattoo. It looks wet and sticky and a little bit blurry.

“Ouch, is it supposed to look like that?”

“Yeah. It’s fine,” he assures me.

I laugh. “It doesn’t feel fine.”

He turns on the water and helps me wash the tattoo and pat it dry. “You don’t want it to dry out; it will itch, and the color won’t stay as bright. Keep putting this ointment on it throughout the day.”

“Thanks, Kade. Do I smell like a bar?”

He laughs. “We both do.”

“I’ve got to get back to the venue and figure out how I’m going to make this ‘event of the season’ happen.”

He chuckles. “I was trying to help.”

“You did; now, I just need to deliver. Thank you for helping.”

“I wanted to.”

“I need to take a shower,” I admit.

“Okay, me too. I’ll head home, but thank you for hanging out with me last night; it was a blast.” He gives me a quick hug and heads for the door.

I feel sad that he’s leaving. ~Dammit, Sloan, what have you done?~

A few minutes later, I’m in the shower and I hear a knock at the door. ~Holy shit, who is that?~ I turn the water off and cover myself with a towel before I open it.

Kade is standing there with a nervous grin. “Sorry, but you left your phone in my car.” He hands it to me.

“Oh, thanks.” I suddenly get really nervous, realizing I’m nearly naked next to Kade.

“You’re welcome. Bye, Sloan.”