Vicky
WHAT THE HELL!
Iâm supposed to be the owner but somehow, Henryâs in control. Completely unbalancing me. Why did I think I was up to this?
I fold my arms tight over my chest like thatâll push down my confused emotions.
Heâs a suit-and-tie guy, the epitome of rich, entitled suit-and-tie guys, a man who has already tried to screw me out of something. A dirty player who thinks heâs the king of the universe.
I tear my gaze from him, put my focus on Smuckers. âWhatâs that? Okay then.â I sigh. âWhile Smuckers appreciates your effort, Mr. Locke, you really just didnât do it for him in the end. Smuckers votes no.â
âYouâre voting no?â Mandy says, glaring at me, then she turns to Henry, expecting him to do something. I supposedly run this company, but everybody is always looking at Henry for everything.
âSmuckers votes no,â I say, needing to take some kind of control back. âSmuckers didnât find the argument compelling. At all.â
Mandy stands. Sheâs mad. Everybodyâs madâtheir anger twirls my gut into a pretzel, but I stand there like I donât care. They tried to push me around and Iâm done being pushed around.
Never again.
âCan you articulate an actual reason?â Mandy asks in a barely controlled monotone. âOther than your being a jerk?â
âLetâs dial it back,â Henry says coolly. I donât know whether heâs talking to me or her. Maybe both. Heâs saying something about the software. A phased implementation, something.
Iâm not hearing him past the rushing in my ears, the thickness in my throat.
The horrible girl, hated by all.
Iâm back walking out of that police station, all the angry questions and cameras.
Iâm in my bedroom, hated Vonda OâNeil, venturing onto Twitter and Facebook, wanting desperately to find somebody out there defending me, saying they believe me.
It wouldâve meant so much.
The picture theyâd always post of me that summer became iconic. It was one my mom took of me just before weâd gone out to dinner at Applebeeâs the summer before. I was fifteen, standing against the hickory tree by the rusty fence, grinning like Iâd never stop. Iâd gotten straight Aâs and that was our dealâstraight Aâs gets an Applebeeâs dinner.
That was a good summer. It was just my mom and my sister and me, mostlyâno skeevy boyfriends.
Mom was in a program at the time, and she had some kind of prescription that leveled her out. And I felt like, if I just kept being the best daughter ever, things would work out.
Staring out at the camera that night, I couldâve never imagined all of America wouldâve ended up staring back at me, hating me just a year later.
Carly had encouraged me to wear her blue sweater today to go with my Smuck U stuff, but Iâm glad I didnât. Why did I think of such a crazy plan?
I straighten. Donât crumble. Hold your head up high.
I take a deep breath. âIâm sorry,â I say. âI can see why youâd be mad after being bullied and tricked. Or being threatened if you donât take a payout. Or being unfairly brought to the police stationâ¦oh waitâthatâs what you guys did to me.â
Mandy rises. âThis is impossible. This is not okay.â
Henry simply crosses his legs. âItâs a business problem with a business solution.â
Mandy slams her folder back together and yanks her laptop cord out of the wall. She walks out with all of the stuff hanging in her arms.
Heart pounding, I make a production out of closing my notebook and repacking my bag. I can feel Henryâs gaze on me. âWeâll revisit this thing,â he says.
I feel dizzy. I should give it all back. Hide in my turtle shell. Why did I think I could do this? Zip zip snap.
âHold on,â Henry says. âWe have something else on the table.â
I set my bag down. I sit. I fold my shaking hands in my lap. âWhat?â
âWe do charitable giving through the Locke Foundation,â he says. âI canât remember the last time we gave to an animal charity. With Smuckers on the board now, I think it might be a nice gesture for the foundation to fund up a needy local rescue or shelter. A substantial gift.â
I sit up. An animal shelter?
Kaleb is instantly on board, suggesting a giant cardboard check.
âLove it,â Brett says. âPeople are going to hear about Smuckers soon enough. Letâs make it a fun news story.â
âRight?â Henry turns to me. âYou wouldnât be opposed to that, would you? Or, Iâm sorry, Smuckers?â
âThatâs the last thing I expected,â I say
âDo you want to spearhead it?â Henry asks.
âMe?â I study Henryâs face. âIs this a trick?â
âDoes asking for your help to identify a charity to give a million dollars to seem like a trick to you?â
âA million dollars?â
âFor our portion. Partners might want to contribute if thereâs enough buzz. We can have a ceremony and introduce Smuckers. Have fun with it. Turn what my mother did into something positive.â
Iâm still stuck on a million dollars. âA million dollars?â
âFor our portion,â he clarifies, like thatâs the unusual part. And not CAPS LOCK! A MILLION DOLLARS! âAnd you can direct it to a specific organization. You know, if you have opinions. Or we can have a consultant handle itââ
âNo, I have opinions. Thereâs this dog and cat rescue shelter my friend runsâtheyâre really good. They just started a stray drop-off center and they could do so much.â
âLetâs schedule it up.â Just like that. Schedule it up. He turns to April. âGet the details and coordinate our calendars on the ceremony. Make a list of who to reach out to and all that.â Then he seems to remember sheâs my assistant, and he turns to me. âGood with you?â
I nod, feeling stunned. Why are they being so nice? But I donât forget my manners. âThank you. Theyâre going to be excited,â I say. âThat is generous.â
âItâs what the Locke Foundation is for.â
April is smiling in the background, because she is all about the Locke Kool-Aid.
âYou want to give your friend a call?â Henry asks. âWeâll want to keep it under wraps until we orchestrate the PR angle, but we can float the donation as soon as they need it.â
I get on the phone to Kimmy to deliver the good news. The board members file out while she squees into my ear. I promise her over and over that itâs real, that theyâre getting that money.
By the time I pocket my phone, itâs just Henry and me and Smuckers. Henry has Smuckers all leashed up.
âWhat?â he says.
âItâs just really nice. For the memory of your mother. For animals in need. For my friendâs organization.â I feel drained. Confused.
âI want to make this work,â he says. âThereâs no reason we all canât get what we want, right?â He takes a step toward me, extending a hand. âTruce?â
Iâm overwhelmed by his nearness, his unexpected kindness, the intense masculine energy that seems to be concentrated in his handâso much so that I feel shy to take it.
But itâs there before me.
I pause, mouth dry. Slowly, I place my fingers inside his. His hand is smooth and heavy, and it closes over mine, swallowing it up completely. Heat shivers through me.
âYou know what we need to do now?â he asks.
âWhat?â
âMake one of those ridiculous giant checks,â he says.
âThat doesnât seem like the kind of thing that would be in a CEO job description.â
âItâs in the CEO job description if the CEO says it is. I make the operational rules here.â He lets my hand go.
I stand there reeling, trying to untangle the annoyance from the allure when he takes Smuckersâs leash and heads across the tundra of blue elegance. Smuckers trots after him without so much as a glance back at me.
âHeyâ¦â I start after them. âYou canât just take Smuckers.â
He gets into the elevator and claps a hand over the door, eyes sparkling. Henry can do anything he wants.
âFine.â I get in and I stab the lobby button a few times. Stab stab stab.
âThe doors donât shut faster when you do that,â he says.
âShows what you know.â I stab it again. The doors shut. âSee?â
He rolls his eyes. And weâre alone.
The air between us is thick and heavy.
He turns to me, gaze serious. âWeâll whip out the check at the fabrication facility. Itâll be good for you to see some of the operations beyond the office.â
I nod.
Just then the doors open and two women come barreling in with a giant cart. âOh, Mr. Locke!â the older one says. âWe can take the next.â
âCome on, thereâs room.â He rests his fingers on my elbow and guides me back to the corner in order to make room for the huge cart. Itâs just a light pressure, fingertips to elbow, but the sizzle burns clear through me.
His eyes rivet to mine. Did he feel it, too? He removes his hand, and I think he did feel it, but no, heâs helping to adjust the cart.
âThank you,â the other woman says, with a gaze of enchantment.
Henry nods and grabs the bar at the back of the elevator.
The thing stops again and a woman and two small boys get on.
I set my own hand on the bar back there, right near his. His suit sleeve grazes my bare arm. My body hums with his nearness, with the tickle of fine fabric.
âWeâve got the Prime-Valu people on four,â the one woman says, unaware of the strange combustion in our corner. âThat room projector bulb issue, but just to be safeâ¦â She seems to wait for his blessing.
He smiles his dazzling smile, the one Carly showed me in pictures, pleased with his minion. âExcellent call.â
The women rattle off some corporate jargon. Itâs clear that they just really want him to see theyâre doing a good job. Everybody loves Henry, magical CEO of the world.
I fix on the projector cord, neatly wound up at the side of the cart, trying not to feel him so keenly.
Latrisha, my furniture maker friend, once said that living, growing trees extend beyond the actual physical space they take up. Standing next to Henry, I think that itâs true of people, too.
Itâs not just the body heat of him; his shining power seems to take over the little space. Maybe thatâs what won him that hot bachelor award, that the space around him seems to crackle with power. Even the elevator is all about Henry.
I should inch away, but the giant cart is taking up ninety percent of the space. And anyway, heâd assume it was because of him. Like Iâm overwhelmed with him or something.
Itâs in the CEO job description if the CEO says it is. I make the rules.
So arrogant.
Around the twenty-fifth floor Iâm wondering if itâs a smell thingâhe has this vague masculine scent with manly notes of cinnamon and something musky. I breathe it in, letting it fill my nooks and crannies.
Maybe thatâs whatâs affecting me. Maybe heâs wearing some pheromone concoction. A zillion dollars an ounce, made from the tears of mighty lions.
Heâs watching the numbers, so I turn my head slightly, in service of my scientific inquiry, breathing him in, telling myself he wonât notice. Itâs cinnamon and musk and something oceany. Deep mysterious ocean with huge surges of waves.
I catch one of the boys studying me. âAre you smelling him?â the boy asks. âYou were smelling him!â
âNo, I wasnât.â
âYou turned your face to him and your nostrils went in and out. That means you were smelling him.â
I smile like I think heâs cute and then I give the rest of the women a baffled look.
Everyone gets out. The door slides shut.
Roller coaster belly flip.
Henry pushes off the wall with the lazy grace of a large predator. He shifts so that heâs leaning sideways, eyes like sea glass, gaze glued to my lips. He lowers his voice. âYou were smelling me?â
I grip the bar. âWhy would I be interested in smelling you?â
âI can think of a lot of reasons youâd be interested in smelling me.â He gets that amused smile I hate so much. He seems to think itâs funny.
My skin heats. âName one.â
âHmm.â His eyes drop to my neck. âIâm going to go with lust.â
âOh my god, you are so full of yourself.â
âThatâs not a no.â
âSeriously? Do you automatically assume every woman wants you?â
He watches me, curious.
âSeriously. You think everyone lives to scrape at your feet, scrambling for crumbs of your attention and approval? Trying to smell you? And if a girl is truly lucky, maybe youâll pick her?â
He tilts his head. Waits a beat.
âWell?â I demand.
âOh, Iâm sorry. Are you waiting for an answer? I thought that was a rhetorical question.â
âOh my god!â
He beams at me, and right then those lopsided dimples appear. The smile that tugs at my belly.
This is his genuine smileâI recognize it as such instinctively. Itâs the smile that cameras never capture, the one thatâs not part of the Powerful Prince Henry show. Real. And so human.
Was he teasing me with the smell thing?
The elevator stops. The door opens.
And heâs on, folks. Heâs straightened up and giving the million-dollar smiles to the group of senior execs. He places his beautifully masculine hand on the elevator door to keep it open and he turns to me, waiting. Ladies first and all that.
Heâs greeting the men by name, joking with them as they file in. They treat him with deference, like heâs a minor deity.
We head out through the fabulous lobby with Henry carrying Smuckers. Heâs macho enough to carry a little dog. All eyes are on him. He knows all names.
I may control fifty-one percent of the company, but the world is Henryâs billion-dollar oyster.
And how does he remember so many names?
Itâs a crisp, sunny day, cool for September in New York. Magically, a limo is there. The driver opens the door.
Henry turns to me, eyes a lighter, brighter shade of blue out in the sunshine. âHow do you feel about walking a bit?â
âIâd love a walk.â
He puts Smuckers down, and we set out through the crowds.
I catch people staring at us and I get the old familiar stir of worry that Iâve been recognized in spite of my hair-color changeâlong curly red hair was one of the more remarkable features of Vonda OâNeil.
Then I realize itâs Henry theyâre watching. Even outside! Young starchitect billionaire Henry Locke. Sure, theyâre looking at me, but only to see who heâs with.
And then somebody snaps a picture of us.
My heart starts to pound. Itâs okay if someone takes my picture, but what if they put it online? I look very different with my glasses and dark hair, but itâs not like Iâve gotten plastic surgery. Discreetly, I slide on my sunglasses. And then he looks over at me and I wonder if he noticed the cause and effect of that.
My thoughts are interrupted by a fight up aheadâtwo guys have gotten out of their cars. Thereâs glass on the road. Fender bender. Voices are raised.
Henry grabs my arm and puts me on the other side of him and sweeps Smuckers up in his arms, all this without even breaking stride. He mumbles something about the menace of texting while driving, but Iâm stuck on the weird chivalry of him.
The crowds thicken even more near the subway station, but he keeps Smuckers under control. Strangers usually canât hold Smuckers right. Henry gets Smuckers.
âYouâre good with him.â
âWe grew up with these dogs,â he says flatly.
Just then I recognize the corner weâre on. âHey, we have to walk up the next street. Come on.â I lead down the block and turn, and there it is. âGriffin Place.â
âWhat?â
âGriffin Place, my fave building.â I point at the statue halfway up, the crouched winged lion. âSee? My sister, Carly, and Iâ¦itâs just one of our favorites.â
âOh, the Reinhold building,â he says.
âRight,â I say. âYou probably know all the names.â
âBeing a smirkitect, you know. It goes with the territory.â
âThe Reinhold,â I say, trying it out, like finally learning the name of an old friend.
Weâre moving closer to it. âIn all of Manhattan? You like the Reinhold best?â He sounds incredulous.
âWhat? Itâs great.â
âHmm.â He seems to view it as an odd choice. Looking at it through an architect CEOâs eyes, I suppose it is. The building isnât tall, itâs not special in terms of fancy flourishes, itâs not even oldâitâs the 1940s kind, all blocky gray stone and deep rectangular windows. But the griffin is cool. Brave protector friend, mouth open in a silent roar.
He slows across the street, in the middle of the block from it. âWhat about it?â Like heâs trying to see it. He really wants to know.
âItâs the griffin,â I tell him.
âWhat is it about the griffin? A lot of buildings have them.â
âI donât know,â I say, but I do know.
âAesthetically?â
âNo.â I feel his gaze on me, and I know Iâm going to tell him. I want to. I donât know why. âSymbolically.â
âWhat does this one symbolize?â
âA moment in time,â I say. âWhen my sister and I first got here, we got lost. We took this bus and it was a disaster.â I smile, like it wasnât any big deal, but it was terrifying. âShe was crying, and I pointed this griffin out and made up this stupid story about him being our brave protector friend.â
Thereâs this silence where I wonder if Iâve said too much.
âDid he help? The griffin?â
âA lot,â I say. âShe stopped crying and we took pictures of him. I printed one out and put it in the kitchen. If nothing else, he scared the cockroaches back down into the drain.â
âYou came here after your parents died.â
âSomebody has been busy investigating my background,â I say.
âSurely youâre not surprised we investigated. Considering.â
I shrug. According to our fake identities, our parents died in a car crash, then I graduated high school at age seventeen and got custody of her.
All lies. Except the custody-at-seventeen part, though it was more like I took custody. Got my baby sister out of a dangerous situation and myself out of the blinding glare of national hatred.
We keep on walking. I take a last look back, remembering myself then. Traumatized, slouching through the crowds in my new brown hair and innocent court clothes, hand-in-hand with Carly, finally away from Momâs lechy boyfriend with his creepy stare that got creepier every time she passed out.
Away from Momâs growing desperation for money for the next fix.
Iâm not sorry I took Carly out of there. She was so young and vulnerable. I saved herâI know that to my bones. But she saved me, too. She was a reason for me to keep fighting.
We stop at a Starbucks. I get a java chip Frappuccino and he gets a latte. We take a cab the rest of the way.
The fabrication facility is a giant warehouse on Front Streetâthe old kind with arched-top windows.
We enter a massive, well-lit, state-of-the-art space full of state-of-the-art machinery in bright, primary colors. The place hums with activity and guys in Locke-blue jumpers making giant things out of metal and wood.
âWe make doors and windows, refurbish heating plants, that sort of thing,â he says over the din. âLocke owns so much property, it stopped making sense to sub this stuff out.â
I keep expecting Smuckers to react to the loud sounds, but Henry holds him tight and scratches his snout in a vigorous way, lulling him with an overload of attention.
Is it possible thatâs what Henry is doing with me? Is it working?
He knows peopleâs names here, too. A few come up and pet Smuckers. We head to an elevator bank at the center of it all and take it up to the drafting floor. We cross a tundra of desks and people doing things on huge computer screens to get to a place with lots of long tables.
He hands Smuckers over and pulls out a piece of foamcore the size of a door. âIâll cut this down a little for the check.â He takes it to a table that has lots of measure markings and slices off two hunks with a large box cutter. âI donât actually do this, typically, but I donât want to pull people off jobs that have been waiting in a queue.â He pulls his phone out of his pocket and taps. Soon heâs the proud parent of a giant printout of a check front. He spray glues the back of the check and we roll it onto the foamcore, working together to avoid bubbles and wrinkles.
Just like that, we have a giant blank check from Locke Worldwide. Itâs signed, but thereâs no dollar amount or recipient.
âMaybe we should get an armored car for this.â
He doesnât reply; heâs setting the check aside to dry. Heâs careful, even a bit of a nerdy perfectionist. âCome here,â he says.
I straighten. Was it a little sexy, how he said that?
He leads the way to a wide-open space full of architectural models; desks and cubicles line the perimeter. âWe have a few exciting projects you should be in on,â he says.
We end up at a table displaying a five-by-five block area covered with tiny buildings and roads and cards and tiny green trees and people.
He puts Smuckers down.
âI thought architects only made these on TV. I mean, donât you have computers for this nowadays?â
Henry kneels down, getting eye level with the thing. âBuilding is one of the most tactile things you can do. Weâre creating physical environments. Making them tiny first, holding them and situating them, it reveals new things about the buildings and the spatial relationships. You see what feels right on the ground.â
He touches the tallest building.
âWhere is this?â
âNowhere yet. Itâs going to be along the Queens waterfront. The Tenâthatâs what we call it.â
I figure out the blue is the East River. âDude, I hate to tell you, but Queens is all built up along the river.â
âThereâs a swath of factories there that are moving to a less expensive area. Weâll knock them down and replace it with residential and green space.â
âIt looks nice.â
He twists his lips.
âYou donât think it looks nice?â I ask.
âIt could be better, but itâs good for what it is.â
âIf it could be better, why not make it better?â
âToo deep in the pipeline.â
Smuckers takes this very inopportune opportunity to jump up and grab at a bit of fabric thatâs dangling off the side. The entire model jerks, and a soda bottle at one end dumps all over a corner of it.
Henryâs on it instantly, sopping it up.
Another guy rushes over to help.
They both look alarmed that the tiny buildings and tinier trees got wrecked. Itâs all very strange, because this is just a model. Itâs a train set village, people!
Then I realize Henryâs really upset.
Henry and this guy talk about whoâs available to fix it up, and I get the feeling they want to quick-fix it, like thereâs an ogre who lives in the closet who will come out and wreck the place if the model is messed up. Honestly, the whole thing is weird. Is Henry not the CEO?
Everybody is on an RFI deadline, whatever that is.
He scowls in his surly way at the wrecked side of town. Iâm glad Iâm not the person who put the soda bottle there.
âRight. Okay.â Henryâs tone is that kind of fake calm where you know anger is just under the surface.
He gets this cool intensity sometimes. Itâs a disturbingly winning combination.