Chapter 5: iii

A SIGH ESCAPED Ryan's lips as she glanced at herself in the vanity.

Sky blue eyes that have lost its color. Dirty blonde hair cascading just below her collarbone and an expression that'll make even the most fiercest warriors turn back.

It was a look she normally didn't have.

Ryan Blair was normally a silent person, a loud mind but mouth shut. Always. Her face wasn't a moodboard, but rather a chalk board. Impassive most of the time.

But today, today the look she mirrored was something belonging entirely somewhere else. She was mirroring a look of anger, memories flooding her like the wave hitting the sand.

And just like the wave pulled back, her memories did too.

The blonde forced a smile, leaning closer as she lifted her hand up to brush away a single eyelash on her cheek.

She was preparing for this day for two months straight and she was hoping results could show. It was her ticket in, the perfect way to get what she wanted without people raising questions.

The blonde mentally reminded herself to thank Aanya for this someday, if she succeeded of course. Maybe then at least she wouldn't feel so bad about withholding stuff from her.

She brushed some strands of hair away from her face, tucking them behind her ear as the door knob turned and the door opened, Aanya coming into Ryan's peripheral view.

"Hey, everyone was kinda wondering why you were late for lunch. So they sent me to get you." She smiled as Ryan turned, mustering up the courage to plaster a fake smile.

It's only been half of the first day back and she was already struggling to maintain a normal facade. Guilt burned in the back of her throat for keeping secrets from Aanya. She knew the reason of course, the reason that Ryan had been preparing for these two months. But she was unaware of the plan that had formulated in Ryan's mind. Her backlash.

"Sorry, I lost track of time." Ryan bobbed her head and got up, grabbing her phone and room key.

Appearances were hard to keep up, but Ryan was glad, that when Aanya and Archer were there, there was a sliver of happiness that kept her from pretending. That small teensy laugh emitted from her throat actually genuine.

She locked the door from the outside, and treaded slowly along the dorm hallways, hand in hand with Aanya as they walked to have lunch.

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"WHAT'S UP loser?" Ryan commented as she hit the back of Archer's head, grabbing the seat next to him. She smiled at Carter, who was in front of her who smiled at her as well.

ALH's dining hall was spared no expense when it was built, it's glamour and splendor vouching for it. The large rectangular hall housed six large rectangular tables, natural light emitting from the floor to ceiling windows which would be doused with heavy drapes imported from France when the sky turns from a sky blue to a fiery orange as the sun retreats back.

Two large chandeliers hung from the ceiling and school staff were busy running around distributing plates of lunch to every student.

Despite her mood a few minutes ago, even just looking at Archer brightened her day up. Archer let out a choking sound, Ryan only now realizing that she had hit him in the head when his mouth was full of rice.

Ryan looked up from staring at her own plate of rice as she heard a muffled sound. She winced visibly as Archer choked on his rice for a few seconds, hitting the table in anger. She clutched the half empty glass of water next to him and chucked it to his mouth. He grabbed it, and chugged it down in one go. After he was done, he shot her a menacing glare, brown eyes gleaming.

"Whoops," She said, throwing him a sheepish smile. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to choke you."

"Who'd you choke?" A voice loomed over Ryan and she tilted her head up to look at Nora Adamms, (Arch's girlfriend) her bright smile contagious. "Arch." She replied, throwing Nora a sheepish smile.

"Oh my god, babe are you okay?" She asked, her brown eyes widening by a fraction. She set her phone opposite of Archer and took a seat, her long arm making contact with his chin. He nodded and pat her hand. "I'm fine Nora, it's all Ryan's fault." He squinted his eyes, glaring again.

Ryan apologized and turned her attention to Nora, squeezing her hand across their dining table. "Hey, Nora. How were the holidays? Must've been horrible to see Arch everyday." She treaded carefully to speak about summer as a whole and not focus on that party. The party. The one where everything went terribly wrong. The one where Ryan lost a piece of herself.

Nora's brown eyes sparkled. She tucked a piece of her ginger hair behind her ear and smiled. Her freckles seemed to have doubled since the last time she saw Nora and she looked like she had put on some weight. She opened her mouth to speak amiably about spending summer with Arch.

That was good.

Ryan couldn't help but smile at the girl as she rambled on about how their trip to the Hamptons was amazing and the weather perfect to tan at the beach.

Ryan couldn't remember exactly when she zoned out during Nora's speech but she did,  her attention focusing on the two boys that walked in to the dining hall.

Her blue orbs invariably followed the both of them, focusing more on the boy with obsidian, raven black hair for a second. Her heart started pulsating suddenly and in haste she shifted her attention to his best friend.

Tate Sutton.

His brown hair was styled neatly away from his face, although two or three strands fell onto his face. His green eyes were piercing and were crinkling slightly, laughing at whatever the raven haired boy was saying. His school uniform consisting of a white button up shirt and black pants fit him well and his blazer was hanging off his right arm.

She could feel bile rising up her throat.

"...Ryan? What's wrong?" Nora asked innocently, her voice underlying a tone of worry. Ryan snapped back into focus, her head turning. From her line of sight she could see Aanya gazing at her with slight worry and pity, knowing full well who she was staring at, at first.

"Huh? Nothing." She said, forcing bile down her throat and a pretentious smile.

"Oh alright. How was the rest of your summer? Must've been very adventurous. You look, a bit different." Nora shoved a piece of chicken into her mouth.

Ryan almost wanted to ask if it was good or bad. True, she had become more lifeless over the summer, pain her only constant companion. But she had also started running again, her desire for revenge strong. She had lost a bunch of face fat, arm fat and thigh fat. It wasn't really visible, considering she hadn't bothered to buy new uniforms so those were baggy and hid her figure well.

"I'm just tired Nora," she passed it off with a small smile. It was still the first day and waking up to a strict regimen was physically taxing.

"Oh alright." Nora laughed. "I know what you mean though. I had AP Calculus as the first period. Remind me why I'm doing this again?" She groaned, setting her fork down.

"Because you're smart babe." Arch replied, sending her a small wink. Aanya made a gagging sound. "Ok, no mushy stuff in our table okay. There are others seated next to us and I don't think they want to hear it either."

Arch shrugged his shoulders. He was never much for PDA anyway. Not as much as Carter that was for sure.

Ryan watched as the others made small talk, with Carter munchingsilently on his food and onlooking his peers just like Ryan. She found a small smile tugging on her lips as she watched Arch and Aanya start a small squabble, Nora, as always trying to make peace.

Ryan was normally the first one to start a fight with Archer, but this time she just watched silently, shoving a small portion of food into her mouth whenever she felt like it.

"Shit," Nora cursed, staring at the Swatch wristwatch attached to her wrist. "I need to meet Mr. Keggs before lunch break's almost over. Looks like I'll be the first one to step out of this room." She glanced at Arch apologetically.

Arch shrugged, running a hand through his smooth blonde hair to straighten it out. "No can do I guess. I'll walk you out." He offered, standing up just as Nora did the same, waving at Ryan and her friends.

Ryan waved back silently, giving her a sweet smile. The blonde returned her attention to the food as Arch walked Nora out of the dining hall.

"So," Carter opened his mouth to speak, emphasizing the word 'so' as he wiggled his eyebrows. "Big plan tonight huh?"

He knows?

Ryan craned her neck a little bit, staring at Aanya. Aanya in turn smiled sheepishly and shrugged her shoulders. "I tell Carter everything. I mean it's harmless isn't it?"

"He's a guy." She deadpanned. "And a friend of Tate." She spoke the last part a bit quietly, not wanting anyone to overhear.

"Who cares?" Carter chimed in. "I mean, fuck. It's cool. Not gonna lie, plenty of guys have done it so why not girls?" Ryan couldn't help but smile at that. It was one of those things she liked about Carter; his honesty and actual sense of humor. (Sometimes)

"Yeah Ryan, it's Carter. He's not gonna tell anyone or anything. It's our little secret." The Indian justified her reasoning and finished her sentence off with a quick flash of her pearly white teeth.

"If it's a secret, why aren't I included?" Ryan's heart dropped for a mini second, the voice sending shivers down her spine in sudden fear. Her body relaxed as soon as she looked over her shoulder, Archer standing close behind her. He grinned for a second and scraped his chair over the tiled floor, taking a seat next to Ryan.

"Because you can't keep secrets dumbass." She deadpanned, shooting him a flat look. He responded by sticking out his tongue. "Real mature Arch." She commented.

She raised a brow at Aanya, her expression mirroring that of an amused smile. What was Aanya gonna tell Arch now? "Hmm I wonder Arch." Aanya snickered, throwing her braided hair back.

"You wonder what Aanya?" He responded, flashing his pearly whites. His slightly crooked canine shone through and Ryan couldn't help but crack a smile at how he's had that ever since he was small. 17 to 18 years and he's never bothered to fix it.

"Can you keep a secret?" She countered. Carter kept his head on the dining table, eyes closed but Ryan knew he was listening. It was pretty obvious with the way he tapped his fingers on the dining table every now and then.

Archer pondered slightly before shaking his head. "Probably not. But I'll do my best, I swear." He replied, all too seriously, raising his palm, like he was reciting some oath.

It seemed to please Aanya and she shrugged. "Hmm, okay then. Ryan why don't you tell your dear best friend?" She batted her long, thick eyelashes and smiled maliciously. Ryan scoffed as Archer shifted his attention towards her, eyes gleaming with interest.

She waited a while, staring back. He clicked his tongue in annoyance after a few seconds and motioned with his hand for her to tell. "Okay, okay, so it's basically like a rite of passage."

He scrunched his eyebrows up, a look of confusion flashing on his face. "A religious act? Aren't you a Buddhist?" She squinted her eyes at him, sending him a look of deadpan.

"What does the fact that I'm a Buddhist have to do with anything?"

"No I mean," he clarified, staring at her. "You said rite of passage and I thought eh maybe you're becoming religious or something..." he broke off realizing that it connected no sense whatsoever to her being a Buddhist.

Aanya snorted slightly. "It's a rite of passage between girls Arch." She explained. She straightened her posture, dropping her hands to the table and intertwining then together. "We do a dare and like, I don't know, have fun with it."

"Ok?" He asked stupidly. "So why is it a secret?"

"Because, blonde boy," she rolled her eyes profusely. "It includes other people and they can't know." He held his hands up in surrender. "Wow okay i'm confused. Just tell me what you all are planning to do."

"So during holidays, the girls got together and we kinda did spin the bottle." Ryan explained, tucking her hair behind her ear. "And we all kinda got drunk so I-" she was interrupted by a giggle from Aanya. "Okay okay so, Ryan accidentally agreed to one of the most celebrated rite of passages the girls in ALH have done since a long time." She chuckled, emphasizing on the 'long'.

"What was it?" Archer asked, cocking his head to the side. He stared at Ryan for a few minutes, earning a small sigh from her. "Since blonde boy over here is pretty dumb," Aanya grinned, "lemme say it in the most simplest way. Basically, Ryan's going to break a boy's heart." She pursed her lips in mock sympathy.

"What?" Arch laughed, throwing his head back. "Lemme guess, Ryan's going to try to 'seduce' - is that the correct word? It's cringe - and then break his heart? Wow you girls are dumb."

"The thing is Arch," Ryan cut in, "what you just called dumb - which I agree - is basically what all of you idiots do everyday. It's basically what Carter does everyday, so technically speaking? You just called guys dumb as well." She deadpanned, narrowing her eyes at him.

"I didn't say you were dumb for that," he retorted, throwing her a glare. "Then what did you mean?" Carter intercepted, raising his head up.

"I meant that the girls were dumb for choosing Ryan to do it." He replied simply, leaning back on his chair as he crossed his arms.

Ryan raised an eyebrow, staring at Arch. "I mean I was half drunk when I accepted but what's that supposed to mean."

"No offense Ry, but seduce? You? Really? I mean look at this," he enclosed his hand around her arm. "You're basically a stick. And do you even have boobs?"

Ryan snatched her hand away, tugging at the neckline of her shirt to check her boobs. Archer leaned in as well, raising his eyebrow to structure his point. The blonde sighed. Before she could protest Aanya smacked Arch's head, throwing him a disapproving look. "Stop staring at other people's boobs Arch."

"I'm just justifying myself," he raised his hands in surrender. "Besides Ry, you've got no butt as well, so I really doubt you'll be able to even get whoever's attention, much less seduce him." He stated rudely, running a hand through his blond hair.

Ryan didn't really know if she should feel insulted (she did feel insulted) or to not feel anything because it was Arch. He was her best friend and he was, always unabashed to say whatever he felt.

But this time, she felt a spark of irritation. Yes she lost weight, but she wanted it. And to say that she couldn't mesmerize anyone completely pissed her off. And being completely out of her normal character, she glared at Arch, opening her mouth to speak.

"Are you sure?" She challenged, her eyes glinting. "Yes," he said coolly, staring at her. "There's no fucking way."

Ryan smiled menacingly, "then challenge accepted. Watch me Arch. Guess I'd better get going then, it takes a while for me to get ready."

Ryan got up from her chair and walked a few steps, stopping at her third step and smiled over her shoulder.

"Loser buys burgers Arch?"

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Hey guys :) this is literally the longest time I've taken to write a chapter lol. Sorry for the late updates I still have exams lol. I hope you enjoyed tho. Love,

-Din