â¤ARIANAâ¤
The game went on for a good hour and I was actually having a nice time watching them have fun. I'd switched to curling up on the couch and not on the floor halfway through and I was warm and comfortable. The only difficult thing had been keeping my face at normal room temperature.
Every time I'd glanced at Chris, he was either already looking at me, or he immediately met my gaze as if he'd felt it somehow.
About forty-five minutes into the game, he'd quit and took a seat on a one-seater close to the group, which I appreciated. Even though the angle he was sitting would require him to turn his head a fraction to look at me, he made it work. They were just glances, but I found myself texting him to stop looking at me. To which he replied:
'You're just so beautiful'
And that brought on another blush and me not replying.
I didn't hate the guy obviously, what happened at school with me and him, and Jared... it just threw me all the way off and I've been rethinking everything. How I was with them and how I'm supposed to be. Obviously, I wasn't all touchy-feely with Jared, but...
Now, I kind of just don't want anyone to touch me, which is kind of contradicting because of what I was doing with Nate when I first came. That was purely playful, though, along with how I am with the rest of them. Well, maybe I was different with Chris, but what I... felt for Chris wasn't the same for the rest of them.
But the fact that he felt the way he did, out of everybody else, spoke volumes to me. Now I just needed time to get myself back on track with who I was. Or who I thought I was anyway. Right now, I didn't even know what I wanted.
I focused on the ongoing game again. The bottle had stopped on Nate for like the third time since the game started but this time, he chose a dare. Well, they coaxed him into it and he eventually gave in.
He lifted his beer to his lips the same time some guy dished out his dare. It had all of us doing a double-take and Nate, a spit take.
"Excuse me?" He stuttered, eyes wide.
"I said," the guy repeated tauntingly, "make out with Thion."
It sounded even worse the second time. I let out a delirious laugh, covering my mouth. My eyes immediately went to seek out Nathion and found him almost instantly. He stood against the wall across the room, talking to some girl with legs going on for miles.
"Out of everybody here," Nate exclaimed, and I couldn't not grin with everybody else, "you ask me to make out with Thion?" he said it like an insult.
"What's wrong with Thion?" I blurted out before I could even think. I couldn't help it.
Nate blinked at me, dumbfounded.
"Yeah, Nate?" Jess backed me up and so did Jules.
"Okay, shut up," he pointed when we kept going back and forth. We laughed and he said, "There's nothing wrong with him, but he's one of my best friends," he emphasized. "That and he's... Thion."
"You gonna do it or what?" the guy pushed, and Nate made a face.
"Nate get with the 21st century, love. You'd make out with Anna if you had to," another girl I didn't know, said, gesturing to me.
Did she just...
I was about to put her in her damn place, but Nate replied, making me rethink it. "Her name is Ariana. And no," he shook his head, "no, I wouldn't. Don't act like you know me."
"Oop," I said under breath the same time a couple other girls said the same thing.
We all laughed, and I exclaimed, "Oh come on!" when Nate reached for a shot and downed it without a second thought.
But then he got up and my mouth fell open. He turned around. And he was walking over in Thion's direction.
Apparently, him and Chris take the shots when they have to do something difficult and not because they're not doing it. It's interesting.
That delirious laugh left me again when everyone started cheeringâwhistles and barking sounds rowding up. I sat up when Thion's attention drew over here because of the noise. He stared blandly, looking around at all of us before he saw Nate walking up to him. Thion jerked his head in a 'what's up' kind of way.
Nate didn't do it right away. Actually, it looked like he was telling Thion about it. Isn't that against the rules? Either way, as Nate continued to talk, Thion smirked before his face broke into a handsome grin.
My heart was pounding, and I gripped my chest, muttering, "Oh God, oh God." It was an excited but nervous kind of chant, where I just wanted time to speed up already because Thion was a very unpredictable person. You never know what he would do until he does it.
Just like I didn't pin him as an advice person until I met him and he kept slapping me with knowledge.
Now, I stared wide-eyed, waiting for him to do something. Mostly I see him laughing it off, but then I can actually see him doing it because he does not back down from a challenge. Ever. Not once since I've met him.
Thion turned to the girl next to him, who was also grinning widely, and said something. She shook her head, her straight dark hair following the movement like waves.
Then he turned back to Nate and said something. While Nate responded, Thion's eyes glanced over his headâat usâand I swear we all stopped breathing. He smirked and winked, before he reached out, still leaning lazily against the wall, and placed his hand on the side of Nate's neck to pull him in.
"Oh Christ, oh God, he's doing it," I mumbled in the quietness that fell over the group.
Nate braced himself by placing his hand against the wall as Thion tilted his head back with his hand and leaned down to press their lips together in a chaste kiss. At first. Until lips started moving and even from here, I could feel the heat.
It stayed quiet for all but a second, all of us watching as Thion used his free hand to curl his finger into Nate's waistband and pulled him closer as they kissed- no- they made out.
The room went up in hysterics, with people pulling out their phones to record it and take pictures. I heard all the excited laughs and delirious giggles along with the guys whistling and cheering obnoxiously.
A hand smacked on my thigh. "You seeing this shit?" Jess exclaimed, shaking me.
I laughed. "Yes, I'm right here."
My eyes went over to Chris. He's been sitting with his body slid down in his seat, but now he was sitting up, his elbow on the arm of the one-seater and his fist pressed against his mouth.
Like always, he seemed to feel my gaze and his eyes moved to me. I grinned, adrenaline drunk like everyone here, and he shook his head but I could tell he wore the same expression I did behind his hand.
My attention went back to the two friends who were still going at it. To be fair, they did say 'make out', and not just kiss. And my Lord, were sticking to it.
Thion angled Nate's head a certain way and Nate craned his head back even more as their lips connected. Again. The height difference was a huge factor in it too. While Nate was only a couple of inches taller than me, probably 5'3, Thion dwarfed him easily when they're standing that close and has to bend considerably to get down to Nate's height.
Smiling, I leaned back again. As exciting as it was, I knew it was going to cause some trouble somehow. I didn't want that to happen, but what started out as a harmless kiss got a lot deeper too quick, and while that's not a bad thing... I remember the barely-there kiss I gave Chris and where we are now. We're not doing so great, but our circumstances are different, and I'll just have to blame those and not the kiss itself.
Who knows, people kiss on dares all the time and nothing comes of it.
When the two finally pulled away, Thion immediately opened his eyes, taking in Nate's face. He said something that made Nate grin, and when he opened his eyes, he pushed Thion by the chest and stepped back. Thion didn't move but he mirrored Nate's grin and said something else to him.
I'd kill to hear what they were saying.
"He really is daddy," I heard Jess mutter.
"You didn't know?" I teased.
The biggest event of the night didn't take too long to die down. However, scrolling through social media had me stopping on multiple pictures and videos of Thion and Nate and what happened over an hour ago.
Since then, I haven't really seen Nate much, and one time he looked pretty upset but I saw Chris go after him, so I didn't have to. But I will if I need to.
During that time, only reason I had to get up was to go to the bathroom, but other than that, everyone came to me to have conversations. Personally, I just think they're sorry for me because I've been curled up on the same sofa, scrolling through my phone or watching everybody have a great time.
It's not like I wasn't having fun. I just... didn't have the energy to have fun standing up.
In all honesty, I didn't want to be here in the first place. I wanted to stay at Jules's house, wrapped up in some blankets, and wallow. They're the ones who convinced me that going to a party might get my mind off things and I fell for it. Stupidly.
Of course, they told me Chris would be here and at the time I thought, "fuck him." I was going to have a great time and act like he doesn't exist and be fine. And at first, I was... until I saw him snap at something Julia or Marianna said to him. It was something on his face that made my whole mood shift and it dropped me into that state I was before.
After our talk outside a while ago, I've felt better. Considerably. But I couldn't get his words out of my headâwhat he'd said to me after practically dragging me away from Jared. I really just couldn't get my mood out of the dump it was in.
The couch dipped close to my feet when someone sat. I looked up to see Thion at the spot. He took my feet in his hands and pulled my legs onto his lap. I locked my phone and leaned back against the armrest, resisting the urge to pull my legs back up to my chest.
"Hi there," I said with a grin.
He took one look at my face and rolled his eyes. "Only reason I'm here is because you've been sitting here moping."
"I wasn't moping," I disagreed and cut him off before he could take the conversation to a place I wasn't ready to discuss again. "And you know that kiss is already viral? Especially since people kept pointing out the two of you are best friends and you're straight." He shrugged, pulling at my socks subconsciously. "Lots of them are saying their gaydar's going off," I sang teasingly but I was actually serious. Most of the comments were people saying how the two of them weren't straight, or they won't be friends for too long now.
"One thing y'all should've known about me by now is that when I decide to do something," he said, turning to meet my eyes, "I don't give a damn what the public wanna say about it."
"Well, excuse me." But I couldn't help my grin anyway.
"He's my boy," he said, looking forward again and shrugging. "I wasn't gonna embarrass him and it had to be special, so fuck anyone who wanna talk shit."
"Why'd it have to be spe-" I stopped, my mind going to one place. "Wait..." I eyed him, and hesitated when I spoke again. "That was..."
He nodded once. "His first kiss." He said it casually and leaned forward to reach for something at his footâa beer. He took a drink, leaning his head back against the back of the couch. "And Nate... he has a problem sometimes. He gotta prove people wrong and I wasn't gonna put him on the spot like that. Not with all you," he turned his head to me again, a smile on his face, "fucking instigators," he finished, and I laughed.
"That's so sweet of you, though." I smiled, trying to pull my legs away but he tightened his hold. He knew what I was doing.
"He might look back and regret doing it- at least, for it to be on a dare. But he can't say it was terrible."
"You tellin' me?" I retorted teasingly.
"Not like you'd know," he smirked. "I don't be putting these lips on anybody."
I gaped, feigning offense. "I'm just gonna," I tried to pull my legs away, but he laughed, still holding them. "Cause you want me to hurt your feelings and I'm not into that right now."
He took another long drink before he said, "Speaking of kisses." He turned his body partially to face me. "You and Rich talk it out yet."
My eyes widened dramatically, and I leaned back with my lips pursed. "And why is kissing associated with me and Chris?"
"Cause he should be kissing your ass after-"
I didn't even hear what he said after that because I started laughing hard. That was the last thing I was expecting him to say. 'Kiss and make up' maybe, but not that.
"I told his ass," he pointed at me. "I told him I'm gonna beat his ass if he don't apologize to you- stop smiling, I'm not playing."
I laughed again. "Now you doing too much." I shook my head with a chuckle, looking away. "And he has, but..." I shrugged, forcing myself to keep the smile on my face.
"C'mere."
I looked back at him and he had his arm outstretched, coaxing me to sit closer. My stomach felt squeezy and I almost did, but then I heard his voice in my head again. You're really not tired of being called a hoe? Looks like you love it actually. It's kind of embarrassing.
I shook my head at Thion, pulling my legs away and pushing myself further into the couch. I smiled at him though, even if my throat felt like it was closing and I couldn't breathe. He watched me for a silent moment.
I cleared my throat, shaking my head. "I'm fine-"
He cut me off, getting up. "Ima fuck him up."
I lurched after him, my heart sprinting, and clutched his arm, pulling him back down. "It's fine," I said, panicked, and leaned under his arm and held it around my shoulders to keep him next to me. I forced a laugh. "It's okay, we already talked about it."
I looked up at him and shook my head when his eyes kept roaming the room. "Thion," I said, snapping in front of his face. He took his time looking back at me, and when he did, I gave him a look. "You're not fighting him. He already feels shitty-"
"I don't give a fuck," he said slowly, shutting me up. "And you don't feel shitty?"
"It's not a big deal- stop!" I leaned into him more when he tried to pull away. "Seriously, stop. What happens with me and Chris is our business and I don't want anyone threatening him." I gave him a pointed look and he sighed like a kid getting lectured. I smiled. "Believe me, he's suffering. And he will be for a while."
He looked down at me then and stared at me silently. "You promise?"
I choked on a laugh. "He's supposed to be your friend!"
"And I have no problem letting my friends know when they're wrong. You should know that by now too."
"I know."
He nodded as a way to say "good."
I rested my head on his shoulder as I said lowly, "He apologized a lot and said some things... did some things that's making it hard for me to stay mad at him."
"Heard he told everybody he's a virgin."
Holding back my grin, I said, "He did. And he put me on the fucking spot too, but... I know he did it for me. The idiot."
Thion chuckled and I spotted some dude walking into the party with a huge vase of flowers.
"Those are pretty," I told him, nudging Thion and pointing at the guy.
I didn't know what kind of flowers they were but there were different types and different shades of purple with some yellow in there and a little bit of white. The guy was in a uniform too, so it's obvious he's delivering.
"I think those are yours," Thion said.
I looked up at him, confused. "What? Why?"
"He's looking at you, and he's walking over here," he laughed.
"No," I denied, then looked back at the guy. Thion was right.
I sat up, shaking my head. "No," I muttered again.
"And," Thion continued teasingly, "He got your favorite colors."
I kept shaking my head as the guy came closer, a smile on his lips.
"Ariana?"
"No," I whined when almost everyone was staring. My face heated, but I held my hand out for the vase when he handed them to me. "Thank you," I strained out with a painful smile.
The guy chuckled, nodding, then turned and headed back for the exit.
Something rested on my shoulder. "Let's read the card," Thion said excitedly, peering at the flowers.
I looked down at him with my eyes narrowed. "So, fucking nosey." I could tell he was grinning, and I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. I reached for the pale, yellow card anyway, even though everybody knew who it was from.
I exhaled, smiling sarcastically at everyone watching, before I opened it.
'What if you hadn't run into me that morning?
What if I'd known you were a junior and not a freshman?
What if your eyes didn't light up when you smiled as we got to know each other?
What if I hadn't gotten to know you?
What if I'd known you before?
We'd had more time before I fucked up.
I'd know everything you are and wanted.
I could've still seen your eyes light up a thousand more times when you smiled.
Still would've made fun of you for being a year younger.
Given you a dozen more times to run into me.
We would've had more time if I hadn't fucked up.
But we both know I would anyway.
So, you can tell my mom.
Your Babbling Fool,
Nikolas â¥'
Through all of it, I kept my eyes narrowed to stop myself from smiling, but I knew I was failing miserably, and when I read the last line, I couldn't hold back my snort, though it was the signature that made me grin like an idiot.
I tried to stop, and my gaze went to the ceiling in attempt to roll my eyes. I hardly got it right though.
"Damn, I guess I don't have to whoop his ass then," Thion said and I laughed. I needed it because I'd started tearing up.
He knows I'm a fucking crybaby and he goes and does this shit.
I shook my head with a smile and snatched my phone up. I dialed his number and he picked up after the second ring. I had no clue where he was or if he'd be able to hear me, but it wasn't that loud in here, so it's not a total dumb idea.
"It's really not even that deep, Chris," I said before he could say anything. He tried to talk but I spoke over him. "It's not that deep. It's really not that deep." Thion pressed his ear against the phone and my cheeks hurt from smiling so hard.
"You like it," he said, and surprisingly his end was quiet. It wasn't a question because he knows how I get when I like something. And this? I loved this.
"You really didn't have to," I told him, moving away from Thion when he tried to turn my phone so he could put it on speaker. I pushed him away with my hand on the side of his face and he leaned back, gaping at me. I held back a laugh as I listened to what Chris was saying.
"It took me half an hour."
I bit my lip, my face hot. I'm smiling too much! "To write it?"
"Yeah."
"Why do you have to be so..." I looked down, playing with a violet petal between my fingers.
"I fucked up. I wanted to apologize," he said, his voice low.
I tried not to focus on how hot he sounded, and replied, "You have." I laughed, running my fingertip along a stem.
"Yeah, but it wasn't enough, and I wanted to see that smile in your eyes again."
"Can you stop!" I covered my face because I was cheesing, and people were still staring. "And just because that happened doesn't mean you should go around buying people flowers."
"I don't buy flowers for people," he said. "I buy them for you."
I threw my head back on the couch. "Oh my God. I fucking hate you."
"You said you love me?" he teased.
I chewed on my lip before mumbling, "Yeah." The other end went silent except for the crickets chirping and crackling in the connection. "You just can't let me be mad at you, so I give up."
His response to that was a sharp laugh.
"Where are you?" I shoved my feet into my shoes, not even bothering to put them on all the way.
"Where you found me the last time."
I didn't hang up as I adjusted the vase and got up.
"Ouu, makeup se-"
I threw my phone at Thion only to gape when it actually hit him. In the nose.
He swore, holding his nose and leaned forward. "You fuck-"
I set the flowers down quickly and kneeled on the couch next to him, trying to tilt his face up to me. "I'm so sorry! I-it was reflex!"
"Get off me," he grunted, trying to pull away. "Ion know how he deal with your abusive ass."
"I-I'm sorry." It really wasn't funny, especially after he said that last part. "I'll go get ice."
I got up but he pulled me back. He was shaking his head at me and making weird faces when I looked at him again.
"It's cool. I was just playing." He got up, working his nose with his fingers.
It was my turn to shake my head. "No, it's already getting red."
He nodded. "Yeah, that's cause I'm pale as fuck. Go." He nodded toward the back of the house. He knew where Chris was. I have a feeling he goes out there a lot when he comes here.
"You're not that pale," I said. He wasn't. His complexion was more of a honey-kissed tone. "Are you sure?"
His expression went blank. "Stop babying me. What I look like to you?"
I held my hands up defensively. "Sorry. It's not like I threw a phone at your face."
He grinned, stepping back. "Rich still on it." He jerked his head to my phone laying face-up on the couch.
I went for it quickly, snatching it up and placing it by my ear. "Hello? Hey. I'm sorry."
When I looked back at Thion he was giving me a smug grin.
"You okay?" Chris asked worriedly.
"Yeah," I breathed, telling him I threw my phone at Thion. He laughed loudly and I shook my head, getting my phone before heading toward the back.
When I got out there, we'd already hung up, and I spot him and Nate laying in the hammock, staring up at the sky and talking.
I smiled widely. I absolutely loved my friends. They're all just so open and not scared to show intimacy and I can't get enough of it. I've always been affectionate but they're the ones who taught me it was okay to show people affection without it being taken as a sexual gesture. They made me okay. That's why the whole thing with Chris kind of messed me up, especially since I wasn't even touching Jared, but I won't let that stop me right now.
"Aren't you two adorable," I teased, still grinning.
They both looked to me and grinned. It was the cutest thing ever. And made me chuckle as I walked closer.
"Wanna get in?" Nate said, trying to make room in the middle.
I shook my head, peering at them. The hammock was pretty huge but... "I don't think I can fit."
"You can," Chris said, nodding for me to get in.
I held his gaze for a second, something warm burning in my stomach and making my face hot.
I shook my head, moving my gaze to Nate because if I kept staring at him, I'd melt into the grass. "No, I feel like I gonna try and it's gonna flip over or something."
Nate laughed, leaning over the side of the hammock mockingly and I stared at him wide-eyed because it looked like he's a second from falling on his face. "Ari, we've done this before. Get in the hammock."
I narrowed my eyes at him but made my way over anyway. I paused when I was almost there and walked around it. They groaned dramatically and I laughed out, "Can you wait?"
A small step stool was at the base of the large tree a couple feet away from the hammock and I took it up and carried it over closer. I placed the vase down on it dusted my hands as I walked back over to them.
I was on Chris's side now and I noticed I'd have to go over him to get in the middle, so I said, "Move over."
He gave me a look. "Do you really wanna be on the end?"
A brief flash of me falling out and breaking something popped up in my head. I shook my head with a face. "Nah."
He hummed and chuckled. "Okay. All you have to do, is place your leg in the middle-"
"So, I have to... like walk over you?"
He gave me a lazy look and I could tell he was high. I had to stop myself from giggling at his face. "You're not walking. You don't wanna stand in it, just... put your leg over and hoist yourself in."
He is so fine. Especially with his eyes all low and his lips glistening.
Sighing like a pathetic fool, I moved closer to him, sliding my feet out of my shoes. I untied his sweater from around my waist. I'd taken it off a couple of minutes ago when I'd gotten hot, but didn't give it back, just in case. I threw it at the top of the hammock.
I placed my hand on his shoulder, looking between the two of them. "Guys, if I fall, both of you go down with me."
"So dramatic," Nate laughed.
"I have to be," I said to distract myself as I placed my leg over Chris's hips like he told me to. "Since no one cares about me falling and dying."
I pressed my hand against the inside of the hammock to balance it since it was tilting too much toward me. Something touched the back of my thigh, at the edge of my shorts, and I gasped at the coolness, but warmed when I figured out it was Chris's hand. I looked down at his face and his eyes were not on mine... But on my chest.
I didn't have to look down to know he was getting a full view of everything under my crop top. It wasn't like it was a fitted one. His hand slowly slid up and over my ass, and if he hadn't had me blushing all night, this was definitely the action that made it happen now.
"Chris," I hissed out his name and he blinked, his eyes moving up to mine lazily.
"Yeah?"
I choked on a laugh, my body shaking with the effort... and something else.
"Sorry, he's out of it right now," Nate said, and the hammock shifted then he held my hips and pulled me in fully.
I fell on Nate with a shriek then I started laughing as the thing swung.
"Did he actually write that poem?" I asked Nate as we readjusted so I was in the middle and not on top of him. I couldn't help but ask because the guy I was talking to on the phone and what I read on that piece on paper was not here right now.
That's when I saw why they wanted me in here so much. The sky. The stars.
The large stretch of black was decorated with twinkling lights, shining brightly, and some of them even moving. I found myself staring with my mouth hanging open.
"Of course, I wrote it."
I turned my gaze to Chris. Now he was looking at my face, a slight frown on his lips.
"No, I didn't mean it like that," I said. "Not that you can't do it, just... not in your state..."
He frowned even more. "What state?"
I rolled my eyes. "You're obviously high, Chromosome."
Nate laughed so hard that the hammock rocked. I grinned at Chris's smiling face.
"Ran out of 'Chris's'?" he asked.
"Kinda," I admitted, turning my gaze back to the sky. I let myself get lost in the stars for a second. "I'll be back on my game soon though."
"Had a really good blunt. You should've been here-"
I cut him off with a laugh. "There's no way I would've smoked with you." I sighed when both their body heats started warming me. I could easily fall asleep here. It's like having two personal heaters that gave off fresh cologne and a faint weed smell. It was soothing.
"You sure?" He almost slurred it and I smiled at how cute it sounded. "It was good."
"I believe you. But no, I wouldn't. Maybe next year."
He hummed. "I'm holding you to that."
I shook my head. I doubt he'll even remember this conversation.
Turning to Nate, I took in his profile. His eyes were closed, his lips parted, and his head swaying slightly from the low music coming from inside.
"Were you smoking?"
His lips twitched in a faint smirk. "A little."
I turned away. "Learning so much about you guys tonight."
"You don't like it?"
I blinked lazily, my eyes closing. "I don't care if you do."
Chris took my hand gently and I only opened my eyes when he kisses my hand softly. I smiled at him. "You're so corny."
"Absolute corniest," he said shamelessly with a smile that made me question if he was actually high or if he was acting.
"Couple more weeks," Nate said, and we knew what that meant.
Chris and I kept staring at each other, and he held my fingers against his lips, but his eyes weren't sad, and his face didn't fall. Neither did mine. It was a silent agreement; take advantage of the time we have until it's up. No more crying, or hurting each otherâjust fun, and laughter, and as many crazy shit we can all get away with in the next couple of weeks.