narrator's pov
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Sometimes we keep our pain inside, sometimes we express it through words, sometimes dance or when it bottles up too much we express it through voilence. But Ember had enough pain in her life, throughout her years it was all she had known
Pressure was always on her back, even from a young age most people looked up to her. Adults ordered her around and put her through experiences that a toddler should never have to. They exhausted her brain without hesitation. They thought it would help her in her future to study more or process information quickly
Hell, they've even trained her to keep her emotions professional when addressing a client the same way her parents addressed their patients. To summarize, Ember had never had it easy when it came to pain
It was always bottled up inside while she held a smile and learned to forget about it, but what no one teaches you was that pain will always live inside. Like a seed, feeding off your mistakes and regret. It is a silent killer, growing everyday without anyone knowing, then one day you feel it all. That seed becomes a tree. You crumble, you burn, you feel it all at once and that my friend is what I consider one of the most deadliest things to exist
Besides my text back game but we not finna talk about that
Ember found herself in a situation that she wanted to escape, Gabrielle's eyes on her made her feel just a slight pinch in her chest
How could someone sit and watch the girl they were falling for decide on spot to get back together with their ex?
It takes balls of steel and a head full of conditioned hair to sit through that cause babygirl I'd be throwing hands, feet and panties over that table. Try me bitch.
"Excuse me" Ember mumbled, quickly slipping her way out of the booth
That slight pinch in her heart was growing, it felt as it there was an imaginary hand wrapped around her throat and squeezing so tighly, desperately wanting the girl to feel that burn inside and out
What kinda black magic shit-
"You okay?" Fallon whispered, quickly grabbing the girl's wrist
Ember's lips curled to the side as she pulled a fake smile on her face, nodding slightly
"Yeah I just need some air" she mumbled
With one last glance over to the blonde who kept her head down, she sighed and went on her way as far away as possible from the three adults
It was what she knew. When her pain would come, it seeped in like the smoothness of the ocean's night, enough to make a sailor smile on his way back home. But then suddenly one wave was all it took to bring a boat crashing down, which is why Ember knew she needed to be as far away as possible from that wave
The girl tucked her hands into her pockets of her coat and took a deep breath in as she walked, knowing eyes were on her as she headed towards the door
Maybe she wasn't meant to find love as yet, maybe she was a path to guide the Gabrielle to the one she truly loved
But why did it hurt that bad? People can grow strong enough to whisper at the iron bars that hold them and see them bend out of their way, like the most crazy magic
That's what love can do, fix souls, fix brains, cure us all. Ember could only wish she could have mastered that way, but it was hard since she had been starving for so long
She could sit and act like there was no cage, wear a mask of coping and normality that she had constantly been fed but she could never rage against the bars. Instead, she chose to feel that tightness in her chest and stay silent
The girl pushed open the door, immediately feeling the cold air enter her lungs and get rid of the stifling breath she kept in from the tension a few seconds ago, bringing a few day into her body
She stood there in the cold, eyes blank as she inhaled the fresh air. It was as if her body refused to move, that wave teased her, making sure she knew that her feelings were in control and she couldn't do a thing about it
It controlled her like a machine, stopping her from doing anything it didn't want. So she stood there with nothing more on her mind than the feeling of her own lost
There was another escape route, yet it was one into another great pain. It was possible to be so emotionally starved that you slip through the bars, no longer bound but with your soul crumbling. What followed was endless emotional marathons on bleeding knees. God knows how much she had learned how to hide the pain, how to look normal. She understood why some go cold inside to escape the pain of isolation, why they let their empathy wither and die, numbness over feeling, mental anesthesia.
Regardless of the pain, living with an incomplete soul is a form of death, and she would rather be a humane human in pain than a zombie needing to bite others to feed
Others would have emotional scars, she was still bleeding because her heart was strong. The thing is, you just need a new bond and you'll be fine, you'll be as good as new, still independent and strong. Love is as the blood in our veins, it needs to flow
But the thought of anyone else was worse than anything she could imagine
"You okay there?"
A warm and familiar voice filled Ember's ear, catching her attention as she glanced to her
"Yeah, sorry I was just...."
"It's okay, you don't need to explain yourself hun" The girl chuckled
Ember smiled sweetly as she sucked in the cold air into her lungs, stepping a few feet closer towards the woman
"What are you doing out here?" Ember questioned
"My shift haven't started yet" She smiled
"You're the one that always gave me free hot chocolate right?" Ember asked
"Ah, you remember me. It's an honor to be living rent free in your mind" The barrister smirked
"I-" Ember's eyes wided as her lips parted and curled in the corner
"That was smooth, not gonna lie"
"Meh, I try" The girl giggled
Her hair was short and curly as they hid under a grey beanie. Ember's eyes ran over the girl's white button up that had a brown apron over it with the shop's logo on it. There was even a cute rainbow bow under her collar that Ember couldn't help but smile at
She had recognized the girl since the beginning, the same barrister that had given her hot chocolate and had small talks with her in the morning
Yet her words seemed a bit different in the moment
She could feel the girl's eyes running all over her body, burning a trail into her skin as they reached back up to her eyes
"So where's that girlfriend of yours?" the girl asked
"I... Don't have a girlfriend" Ember mumbled
"Shit, so you're saying I actually have a chance?" The short hair girl asked making Ember tilt her head back and smile
"You don't waste anytime huh?" The brunette asked
"I've waited a long time for you, I'm not sure I can wait some more" The girl said, taking a step closer
Ember rose a brow at the girl but stayed in her same position facing her
"What happened to the blonde girl you were chasing after?" The short hair girl asked
"I'm... Not sure myself" Ember mumbled, glancing over to the shop
The view of the adults were clear since their booth was right next to the glass wall of the shop
But the brunette furrowed her brows when she noticed it was only Henry and Fallon sitting at the table
Where was Gabrielle?
"Trouble in paradise?"
"If I'm being honest, it doesn't seem like paradise right now" Ember mumbled
"Hmm, let me guess. She's straight?"
"Wha-"
"Any girl that hasn't snatched you up yet is either two things. Straight or dead because even the visually impaired would hop on you by now" The short hair girl said
Ember shook her head smiling as she tried to stop the slight burn in her cheek. It had been a while since someone had made her blush
"Are you saying you want to ride me?"
A/N
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