Chapter 64

After riding for hours, Shendu reached a certain place that was completely out of human life. The place was full of green. The coldness pierced into bones, causing the skin to swarm with goosebumps when the icy winds hit the face and skin.

Shendu pulled Shen Nuo from the horse back carefully. Shen Nuo tightened his cloak around him with shuddering lips and looked around astounded.

Around him loomed a thousand pillar like enormous emerald green mountains, their tops hidden amid a thick impenetrable fog that swept leagues above. Looking above at the sky, nothing saved the view except for a thick mist. Not even the sun. The evening was deepening.

"This." Shendu said pointing at a tall stony pillar. "Is the entrance marking to the private territory of Li Yan. But the borders are sealed with mortal and deadly repulsive enchantments casted by Li Yan himself. No one can break through them except him. Not even me. It can burn me to ashes in an instant."

"..." Shen Nuo was speechless.

"But you can."

"Huh?"

Shendu sighed. "Shen Nuo, didn't Li Yan give you his blood promise? No matter what, the enchantments would still identify you as Li Yan if you pass through..."

Shen Nuo did not know what to say. He looked at the rising tall mountains that stood like silent gloomy ghosts under the gloomy sky. "This place..."

"Jingshan - Mirror Mountains. This is the place where Li Yan practiced martial arts when he was small. The place is full of spiritual energy. It's the private territory of the Li imperial lineage and no outsider is allowed. So you better be careful!"

"I understood." Shen Nuo said obediently, lowering his head.

"And, finally, don't force yourself." Shendu sounded a bit reluctant when he said this. "Though he might not have ended his seclusion, still half of the time had already passed. We cannot say how much he must have progressed through. He might remember you, but if his progress is fast, he might have already forgotten you. So in that case, I need not say what you should do right? You know what kind of a monster he is when he is angry. So you better hurry and come back to me. If you don't come back within an hour, I'll leave, understood?"

Shen Nuo nodded again, with a wildly beating heart. So when he passed the enchantments and walked through the mountains, he came an open heath like place full of refreshing lemon grass.

From the front most closest mountain, an enormous waterfall thundered down to the foot of the mountain, cascading into a thousand glimmering silver curtains and flowed down to a massive clear watered lake layered with an expansion of white lotuses.

And a thick mist floated above, kissing the icy cold water. Wet and mossy stones protruded by and then amid the steady silver flow. Shen Nuo was mesmerized by this beauty. But he did not know why he felt a strong sense of loneliness and melancholy, just by looking at the view forth him.

Suddenly he spotted a person far away, at the brim of a mossy stone by the lake with his hands behind his back, watching the thundering waterfalls silently. His long white sleeves reached the mossy stones beneath his feet. In his hand was a scroll.

Shen Nuo's heart bled. Who was that? Where's Li Yan? Perhaps that person might know....

He slowly stepped forth towards the rising stones where the other person stood but was suddenly caught off guard by a cold and icy voice.

"Do you think you can successfully pass through the enchantments that Zhen had casted and trespass here without Zhen knowing it?" That person spoke coldly.

Shen Nuo froze behind Li Yan with a shudder. He felt thunderstruck.

Wait - !!! That was... That was unmistakably Li Yan's voice but -

There was a strange tone in that voice that chilled Shen Nuo into the marrow of his bones. No! That wasn't the way normally Li Yan spoke to him...

The moment Li Yan turned to look back, Shen Nuo's heart felt as if stabbed. It was the person he knew, coldly handsome to the point of looking devilish... But also not the person he knew...

The Li Yan who stood infront of him now looked taller at least half a foot more than his usual tall self in his white and silver flowing robes. His hair had turned completely white despite his face that looked a lot younger if possible, with fair and smooth skin, dark and long lashes, straight and sharp nose and thin seductive lips.

But-

The pupils of his long and narrowed majestic phoenix eyes were now golden...

Between his brows was the beautiful silvery totem of a mark of lightning...

His hair that freely scattered down his waist was long and silvery white...

He didn't look like a normal human at all. Matched with his rare attire of silver and white, standing tall and lordly amid the stunning misty landscape of the waterfall, he did not look like a king at all, he really looked like an immortal...

Shen Nuo felt a strong pain in his heart. This... This is not the person he used to know. What has happened to Li Yan? Why was his eyes golden? Why was his hair white? What is that totem between his brows?

He did not know...

Li Yan had dressed himself in golden since the day he was born. When did he dress himself in white? This somehow made him look very distant and unreachable, like a moon in the mirror, reflection upon water...

Tears frosted Shen Nuo's eyes. "Li... Li Yan?" That voice was hoarse.

But the moment Li Yan saw who the other person was, he was shocked to the extreme. His thin lips slightly opened and closed. "You -"

If truth be spoken, he had already mastered the Phoenix Scroll by now, which gave him matchless powers.

To be honest, when one break through this technique, the skills would naturally help the person to forget his deepest obsessions. It would help him get rid of emotions which would root the way to many sufferings. That was originally the way a phoenix sage would enter the life of his celebacy first.

Li Yan finally made up his mind for this and wanted to forget everything. But, even after mastering the entire scroll from back to start for several times, he still clearly remembered. He still remembered everything...

At times it really made him wonder what kind of a strong obsession he must have on Shen Nuo. It was simply beyond his comprehension to understand. It was simply inexplicable, and unspeakable...

Li Yan pursed his lips. "This isn't a place for you to barge in as you wish." He said in an unhappy voice. "You can leave immediately."

But Shen Nuo wasn't listening. He ignored the clamouring pain in his heart and determinedly stared at Li Yan with narrowed eyes. But he couldn't stop the tears that filled them gradually. "Li Yan, we need to talk!"

"What is there for us to talk about?" That voice was cold as ice. There was no slightest touch of gentleness in it.

Shen Nuo felt hurt. He gritted his teeth in pain. "I will leave after you answer all my questions!"

Li Yan looked away. He didn't speak. Shen Nuo blinked several times to forcefully restrain the tears that were going to leave his eyes. "Why did you send me the divorce?"

The sky was utterly dark above them now, with heavy clouds that flashed with soundless lightnings at random, brightening the entire territory of mountains for a second. It forebode storm. But it was no where near to the storm that Shen Nuo felt to the depths of his heart.

"Li Yan..." He suddenly choked. "I asked you a question!"

Li Yan tightened his jaws. "Isn't that what you wanted even from the beginning?" He spoke with a sigh. "Anyway, since I've already given you the divorce, there's no reason for you to hang around me, right? I've set you free. You can do whatever you like, go wherever you wish and marry whoever you -"

SLAP-!!!

Li Yan's face tilted to the side in the pressure. His ear was burning. He gritted his teeth and turned to look at Shen Nuo.

Shen Nuo's eyes were bloodshot, as if to drip not tears but blood. "Ok, you gave me the divorce and set me free, fine! Then tell me what on earth were you that you couldn't tell me anything before!"

Li Yan pursed his thin lips. His eyes were drenched with sorrow. "I told you in every single way I can." He spoke hoarsely. "If you had been a bit attentive on me, you would have understood."

Shen Nuo choked in tears. He closed his face with a palm, crying furiously. "Li Yan!" He shouted in pain. "I'm only sixteen! I don't understand many of your big matters that you work with, ok? I'm not as knowledgeable as you! I'm just a consort!"

He slowly felled onto his knees and sat down on the wet and mossy stone. His face was wet with tears. He was crying. "Li Yan, you should have just talked to me, ok? What's up with your f@#king cold face? Will you die if you talk a bit frankly without hiding all to yourself?"

He slowly raised his red eyes to look at Li Yan again. "Why do you want to leave me?"

"Because I can't make you smile." Li Yan said in a bitter voice. "You look very happy everytime you spend with others, even with Zhanhua. But you only cry whenever I'm near... But I don't want you to. So leave!"

Shen Nuo smiled hatefully, his eyes drawing even red. "Nice excuse! But I'm not a child anymore, Li Yan."

Li Yan couldn't take it anymore. He grasped from Shen Nuo's shoulders and shook him violently. "Why don't you understand me, Shen Nuo it's too late! Just leave me alone, ok?"

"Li Yan, what exactly the you hiding from me? Just tell me, we can solve it together, ok? I can help you!"

Li Yan's breathing was now extremely messy. "Help me? What can you do?" His eyes were red as if to drip blood. He stared at Shen Nuo's eyes with narrowed eyes. "Why don't you try to understand, Shen Nuo, I might accidentally hurt you. Because I'm already beginning to forget you!"

And these words ended up like a stab in Shen Nuo's heart. He shook his head furiously, tears pouring down his eyes. "It cannot be, no! Don't lie! You loved me for two lifetimes! How can you forget me just like that!!?"

Li Yan flicked his silver edged sleeve. Shen Nuo was swept away in the sudden and terrifying internal force and he was thrown into the lake. For his pure luck, the water was only slightly above his waist.

But the icy coldness of the water froze him to the marrow of the bones. His lips drew pale and chapped. His skin drew slowly bloodless as he breathed heavily with a lowered head. He slowly raised his eyes that were red with tears and looked at Li Yan.

"Shen Nuoyan, wake up if you're dreaming!" Li Yan said in a sharp voice. But that voice was slightly shuddering. "We both lived two lifetimes together but nothing came out of it! Why should you still force yourself?"

Shen Nuo was silent for a long time as he stood there in the mid of the icy lake, shivering. No one knew what he was thinking. Only tears gathered at his chin and dripped down onto the lake water. After a long time, he nodded smiling bitterly.

"Also true. I can only be your burden if I'm around you." He laughed gently. That laughter was wrenched in pain. He slowly brought out a small glassy phial from his sleeve. That phial had a glimmering water like liquid. He looked at it and smiled with red eyes.

Li Yan who stood at the bank went pale. Blood left his face.

But Shen Nuo shook his head and pulled the lid with trembling hands. He slowly brought the brim to his lips. Just as he was to swallow the scorching liquid, someone grasped from his wrist tightly.

Li Yan stood infront if him with narrowed eyes. At some unknown moment, he had returned to the water.

"What is it?"

Shen Nuo smiled. That smile looked indescribably beautiful. "Poison..."

Li Yan tightened his jaws. The force exerted on the wrist doubled and Shen Nuo gasped in pain. The phial slipped through his fingers and felled into the lake.

"You still don't try to understand me, do you?"

The Emperor was still staring at him coldly. Shen Nuo did not know whether because his eyes were blurry or he was imaging things, he thought he saw that there was a sudden touch of wetness in those cold eyes, though his face remained indifferent than ever.

There was a slight touch of some unfathomable feelings mixed with depression and disappointed in those slightly raised phoenix eyes of Li Yan. He gritted his teeth, his forehead veins, bulging.

"Shen Nuo, you're going too far!"

"So what?" Shen Nuo said bitterly. His voice was very hoarse. "I have my own dignity. This has nothing got to do with you. Didn't you say we are already divorced? Should you still care?"

Li Yan kept staring at him for few seconds. Then suddenly he raised Shen Nuo from the waist and sat him on a nearby flat stone. Shen Nuo's back slammed onto the mossy stony wall behind him and Li Yan trapped him in a dead lock between his mighty body and the stony wall.

He slammed his strong palms either side Shen Nuo's waist, onto the wet stone where Shen Nuo was sitting and he leaned down to Shen Nuo's pitiful height.

"Sentence by sentence, without missing a single word, repeat everything you said just now." Li Yan said in a low and a venomous voice.

Shen Nuo's lips were trembling. His entire body shuddered violently from Li Yan's aggressive movements from few seconds ago. Tears kept pouring down his lowered face. Low sobs escaped his tightened lips convulsively. He looked no different than a scared child.

Li Yan who saw this, felt his heart tighten. For nearly a half an hour, he tried to scare off Shen Nuo from here only because he did not want him to suffer in the future. He was a person to die. He still did not know how Shen Nuo would react if he tell him this truth. It wasn't that he wasn't hurt.

Shen Nuo's every word from today were but sharp swords and daggers in his heart. It was just that he endured. But Shen Nuo was like a puppy that was being disowned by the owner. It kept clinging hard and did not want to leave at all.

And now when he saw Shen Nuo's pitiful self, he felt hurt. He tried to raise Shen Nuo face to him but Shen Nuo slapped away his hand, crying loudly.

Li Yan sighed. "Nuo Nuo..." He said in a soft whisper. "Look at me."

Shen Nuo slowly raised his tear stained face to look at Li Yan. Streams of silver waters curtained down from the nearby rocks and felled down cascading upon the teeth of uneven rocks, wetting his long and shiny raven hair.

Water lines trickled down the side of his face, felled down from his pale chin along with his tears, trailed down his rolling adam's apple and disappeared into his wet chest lapels.

His dew frosted lashes were dark and long like fluttering butterfly wings as they trembled slightly. His trembling wet lips were like small pale pink cherries. And his half wet handsome face was fully frosted with dewy water drops.

Dark strands of scattered hair glued to the sides of his long face, adding a different charm.

But his beautiful glassy eyes were red and moist with tears which added a sorrowful taste of melancholy and bitterness.

Li Yan silently pursed his lips, caressing Shen Nuo's hair with his fingertips. That gesture could be said to be very intimate, as they both, one standing, one sitting, held close to each other, with their faces close and heavy.

Li Yan leaned down and hugged the trembling person in his arms. But their foreheads were pressed against each other and their eyes met and locked.

"Tell me." Li Yan said softly. "Tell me everything that's bothering you. I'll tell you the truth."

Shen Nuo looked at him sadly. "What are you hiding from me?"

Li Yan's heart bled. He wanted to tell the truth. He wanted to tell he won't be living too long.

But could he really say that? Could he say he was raised just to sacrifice himself for the betterment of the state one-day? He was also human. There were also things in this world that he was reluctant to leave.

But his final attempt to forget them also failed when he realized even after mastering the phoenix scrolls, he still remembered everything.

He opened his mouth and struggled. "Nuo Nuo, I... I..."

His voice was utterly hoarse. No matter how many times he tried to tell, his tongue didn't yield to him. He shut his eyes furiously, hugging Shen Nuo tighter and painful tears left his eyes. Finally he opened his mouth and said something he didn't want to say aloud instead of what he really wanted to say. "Nuo Nuo, I love you!"

For a split second, a silence followed with both of them stunned. Shen Nuo's heart burned. Li Yan... He really said that he loved him... But, it didn't matter him anymore. He did not move his eyes from Li Yan. "Don't run away from my question." That voice was firm.

Li Yan was silent for a long time. Only tears moved down his pale expressionless face. But his red and narrowed eyes were wrenched with pain as they stared at Shen Nuo in a dead lock. Then suddenly without warning, he pushed Shen Nuo against the mossy stony wall and locked his lips with him.

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(OMG it's the next chapter. I'm super nervous though... 😅😭 Don't worry, everything will be cleared and you'll get the chapter you had been waiting for ages. But don't report me, ok?)