32. FORGIVE & FORGET

ACT FIVE SCENE SIX

FORGIVE & FORGET

sahar glacé

PERSPECTIVE

SOMETIMES I wonder why certain people behave the way they do. Although Asher's words were harsh, I learnt something about myself and that was to never ignore the past. Each mistake you commit in the past and choose to ignore will find you in the future, no matter how hard you try, you will be forced to meet with that mistake. People call it karma. My karma, Asher, he was here to remind me of my mistake.

Each time I look at him, I'm reminded of the past and the horrible mistake I made. I used him and ignored him. I spent years hoping that he'd forget what I did, so we could move past it and pretend it never happened. And that was my mistake, pretending that someone could forget so easily. He remembered everything and now I feel horrible.

And now here I was, in a pretty dress, sitting down in a lonely park on a swing. The wind brushes past me, it was a nice feeling, to be alone. I don't know why I feel that I should place other people's happiness above my own. I keep ignoring my happiness, I keep doing good for others only to receive no good back.

Will it always remain like that?

"I don't think it would."

It was Helius, a golden smile on his face.

"Helius." I stammer, confused as to why he was here. He was supposed to be at Luca's party and completing our deal by helping Luca. Helius simply smiles, taking a seat on the swing beside me.

"As long as you have me, you'll be happy, I'll treat you good and never expect good back because you just existing is good enough for me." his words felt heartwarming and just enough to make me feel a billion times better.

Helius takes a deep breath. "I don't think you understand how important you are to me and everyone else, so please, don't ever feel like this."

I felt my eyes watering. Everything he says feels like a dream but I can't seem to understand how someone could be so good. Every time we talk, the more I seem to feel more understood, he doesn't make me feel ashamed of how I feel. So this is the person my mother was talking about when she described the meaning of friendship. He's right beside me, making me feel happy.

"I won't, thank you Helius." I smile, standing up.

His eyes follow me as I pull him into a hug. I could feel his arms wrap around my body tightly. His hands rub my back gently as I rest my head on his shoulder. "Sahar, do you think I'm a good person?" Helius murmurs, his words were soft and gentle. I think he's a good person, someone with good morals and values - a friend that I can't even think of losing.

"I do, everything about you is good, you're my friend after all."

"Right, friend," he whispers, holding on to my body tighter. "We should go back, Luca needs you." his words cause me to freeze. After Asher's warning, I wasn't sure it was the best idea to return to Luca's party. But Luca needs me, not Asher. I don't want Luca to get engaged to a random girl, he doesn't deserve it, nobody deserves it.

The only way to let Luca out of this situation is to talk to his mother.

I pull away from Helius.

"We should go now, I don't want to waste any more time."

Helius looks up and smiles. "Selfless."

"What?"

"If there was one word to describe you it would be selfless and that's what I like about you the most, it makes me want to like you more." his words cause me to look down embarrassment. Helius is always upfront about what he has to say and that's the scariest trait about him, he isn't afraid to speak how he feels. Selfless, he doesn't know how selfish I was back in the past, I used Asher and still haven't apologised to him to this day.

-

BOTH of us arrive at Luca's party.

The moment we walk in I could feel the tension in the atmosphere. Helius places his hand behind my back, supporting me. I gulp as I notice Asher leaning on a pillar, talking to a dismal looking Luca. All I have to do is talk to Luca's mother in private and then everything will be alright.

"She's standing next to the large red flower decoration, go quick, I'll distract Asher and Luca." Helius whispers, his hands were no longer supporting my back, he was heading towards Luca and Asher. I take a deep breath and exhale, she's the reason why my mother is no longer here with me, she's the reason why I struggle to lead a normal life. Her pretty face is a horrible mask, all I want to do is tear it into pieces and shame her in front of everyone. Exposing her would make me feel better but I couldn't do it. I'll ruin Luca's life, his business will suffer deeply with his family issues coming into light.

I stand tall, walking towards the lady with raven hair. She was alone and gazing at the pretty rose decorations. She seemed so innocent and looking at her, nobody could assume that she's a lawless person. But behind that pretty exterior was a horrible woman with no care for the world - in this world, everything was about her and nobody else.

Before I could speak, she notices me and smiles. "I was waiting for you to approach me, it took you long but I do appreciate you're finally here Sahar." her words were like velvet, so soft and delicate. I could feel my pulse rising, everything about her screamed poison, a scornful character with no morals.

"Always as observant as ever." I mutter as she leads me towards a room. Her heels click as she walks along the marble floor. She shuts the door behind her, taking a seat on a black leather sofa. Her hand gestures towards the seat in front of her, I sit in front of her with a frown. It irritated me that she was being polite, when will she show her true colours?

"You've become a... grown woman." her eyes were focused on my thighs, she grimaced as she looked back at my face. She clearly is talking about my body, to her standards, she views me as fat. It did hurt, she views me as the same way my aunt does. I place my hands in front of my stomach, I hated that my dress showed the outline of my stomach, I hated that my body looked like this.

"I came to talk about Luca, not myself." I say bitterly, glancing deep into her eyes. She releases a laugh, looking down at me as if I was below her.

"My son, what do you want to say about him? Don't tell me you want to get engaged to him, a girl as big as you doesn't fit the criteria." her words sting. I lacked confidence in my body, for someone to comment on my body made me feel worse; my mind felt polluted with disastrous thoughts.

"He should be able to decide whether he wants to get engaged, not you."

She laughs once again.

"In this world there are two types of people. One that always thinks with their brain like me and the other," she looks at me pathetically. "The other that thinks with their heart, you."

"His engagement is better for business, we will get wealthier and that's called smart thinking. If you think about it the way you're thinking, you're too emotionally attached, you don't need love to lead a happy life... happiness comes from money, luxury and pleasure." her words lacked humanity, she didn't seem to care about anyone.

"My son is free to do whatever, he doesn't have to worry about breaking his wife's heart because love won't exist in their relationship."

"So that's how you view Luca's life," I say, glancing up to meet her deadly gaze. "Can't you tell he's not happy?"

"He is happy, more money means more happiness."

I scoff.  "Happiness can be found in anything but it remains permanent when it's shared with another person, nobody relies on just things to be happy, as people we need someone else to be truly happy and you're depriving Luca of that." my words fly past her, she didn't care, she believed in what she wanted to. She has an authoritarian personality, she's stubborn and refuses to change her beliefs.

"You want to be that someone else, that's what hasn't changed about you, you're still a cunning daughter of a useless house maid." her words were malicious, heartless and without doubt cruel. My mother was more than a house maid, she was a loving person with dreams and values. The lady in front of me stole everything, she crushed it into pieces and burned each and every last hope I held on to.

"I don't want your son, I wish best for him." I say curtly, clenching my fist tightly.

"You do want him, you're a pathetic person who wants him for his money — you need to act how you look because a poor girl like you has too much attitude." she states coldly, scanning her perfectly manicured nails.

I look at her in disbelief. "I've never liked your son in my life, all I want to do for him is be a good friend and here you are assuming that I like him for his money."

"That's what they all say, get out before I kick you out myself."

I pull out the document from my bag, it contained evidence for what Luca's mother did to me. I even have video evidence for what occurred years before, the person in the car was one of her workers who ruthlessly killed my mother in a hit and run. They didn't bother calling the paramedics, they just left her there to die in my arms. Her then sending me to a care-home known for their horrible scandals was the lowest of the low, she left me there to suffer and live a childhood filled with trauma.

I throw the document on the table in front of her. "Think about what I told you, you wouldn't want your son getting engaged after this." her eyes scan the document in horror, she knew exactly what was there and there was no denying that she was scared.

I reach for the door with an accomplished look. There's three types of people in this world. She forgot to mention that the third person thinks with their brain and heart. And that's exactly who I am.

"Wait."

I turn back with a nonchalant gaze.

Her pretty face was pale.

"I understand that you want Luca to not get engaged today, but before I stop that from happening, I need to know one thing." she says, glancing up at me. "You don't plan on loving my son, do you?" she grimaces as she says the word loving.

I simply smile. "I plan on loving him, he deserves everything in the world — that's what I'm here for, to be his happiness so he won't ever feel like this ever again because that's what friends are for, they're for life."

"You call that friendship?" Luca's mother laughs.

"Then what is friendship if that isn't friendship?" I question her.

"You're mistaking your relationship with Luca, I'll leave you to figure out what friendship really is." she walks towards me, her eyes scanning me in distaste. "You're pretty but if you want to be around my son, you need to lose weight." she opens the door, leaving me to glance at the mirror in front of me.

Mistaking my relationship with Luca? What is she trying to say? And to be around Luca she wants me to lose weight?

Is my weight really that bad?

"Why do I always find you at the wrong moments?" I find Helius glancing at me through the mirror. He wraps his arms around me from behind, pulling me closer towards him. "Do you always ask yourself these stupid questions?"

I feel nervous as he securely grips my waist.

"Don't you understand that you're beautiful? How many times do I have to tell you this?" he scolds me. He's the only person who is constant with words, he keeps to his words and never changes his mind.

He rests his head on my shoulder. "I remember telling you that I like my girls thick." he mutters something under his breath, but I don't seem to catch it. I furrow my eyebrows, why does he always do this?

"You like what?"

"I like how you are, don't change for anybody please." I smile, everything about him still feels like a dream.

"Thank you, again."

He takes a step back. "No problem, we have something to see don't we?" he gestures towards the door. Luca's mother is going to tell everyone that he no longer has to get engaged. A smile forms on my face, we actually did it. Luca will be free and happy.

"Let's go!" I pull him by the hand towards the door. Helius laughs as he follows behind me. As we both return back to the hall, I notice Luca's mother standing on the stage with Luca's father.

Luca stood beside them with a blank expression on his face.

"As you know it's a Valdez tradition to get engaged on their eighteenth birthday, but today will be different, there will be no engagement because my son wants to finish his education and graduate college independently." Luca's eyes widen at his mother's words, he looks at his mother with shock as people in the crowd begin to murmur indecipherable things.

"I hope we all can enjoy the rest of the night." Luca's father says, raising his glass in the air. People follow after him and cheer. I notice as Luca looks dazed, it's as if he didn't expect things to go the way he wanted. I smile, it's what he deserves, to find his own happiness.

"See," Helius says, gesturing towards the other billionaire bad boys club members smiling and pushing each other playfully. "We all need you." he says, his words warm my heart once again. I'll be forever indebted to him, he's a friend that feels like a dream. Everything about him is golden.

"Thank yo—"

"How many times are you going to thank me?" Helius says, holding my hand. "I should be the one thanking you, my friend no longer has to suffer and it's all thanks to you Sahar, now go to the birthday boy." he smiles radiantly, pushing me towards Luca who still seemed dazed.

"Luca." the sudden mention of his name causes him to look up and meet my eyes. He smiles brightly and this time it was genuine.

"Sahar I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to say those things to you earlier, we are at that stage of friendship, you do mean so much to me," Luca says, suddenly wrapping his arms around me. I felt his tears on my shoulder. "I can't imagine my life without a friend like you."

I pull him away. "Let's continue to be friends, don't ever get mad at me again." I wipe his tears away, his bright smile causes my heart to melt.

"I won't, I promise." he glances down at my dress.

"You like it?"

Luca nods his head. He moves my bag away from my stomach, I instantly feel self conscious. His mother told me I was big, a girl like me can't hang out with him. I gulp as I feel his gaze on my body.

"Don't cover, you're beautiful." I felt my cheeks burn at his words.

Before I could take my bag from him he does something else.

"I'll hold this." he takes my bag and holds it. "It matches my tie." he laughs.

"You always surprise me." I mutter, glancing at Luca. His smile was pretty.

"We didn't have to do anything, it's weird how your mother suddenly changed her mind. I wonder who made her change her mind." I gulp, it was Asher. His gaze was focused on me. Luca still keeps his smile as he looks up at Asher.

"Whoever it was must've been good at negotiating, that woman is crazy." another voice enters the conversation, it was Jumin. As he notices me he smiles. I would've smiled back but Asher's gaze was distracting me.

"I agree, she is crazy, the person who changed her mind must've been beautiful." I hear Helius, his shoulder brushed against mine. I felt instantly comfortable, ignoring Asher's gaze. I don't owe him any explanation, I did what I thought was best. And it all worked out in the end.

"I owe my life to that person." Luca says. I nervously smile. I won't tell him it was me, he doesn't have to know what his mother did to me. He's innocent unlike his parents.

"Sahar, could we talk?"

Asher glances at me.

I nod my head.

Asher walks on as I follow behind him. But before I could leave Helius stops me.

"Let me come with you." he says.

"It's okay, I'll talk to him, maybe I can finally explain myself for the last time, if he doesn't want to talk anymore I'll understand." Because what I did was unforgivable and it's reasonable for him to be angry at me. Helius shouldn't ever know what I did, because what I did was selfish and not selfless.

"I'll be waiting for you." he says. I nod my head before walking into the room Asher entered.

I shut the door behind me.

Asher glances at me. "I'm glad you did it." he murmurs, instantly looking at the ground.

His words surprise me. He felt glad.

"There was no other way for this engagement to stop, I didn't want you to talk to his mother because there's something wrong with that woman. I was going to find another way but I couldn't because there was no other way," Asher says before hesitantly looking at me. "She's not the type of person to talk to, she's manipulative and judgemental — she uses your biggest weakness against you." Biggest weakness. She must've realised I struggle with self confidence, so she went straight for it.

"And I know what your biggest weakness is. It's sad that you feel this way about yourself, I know you see a problem but I don't, I never did and I never will." I gulp at his words, the only thing that I liked about him in the past was his ability to make someone feel better. "If you continue to feel bad about yourself, you'll let your weakness take over your mind, you'll feel unhappy and that's not how you should live your life, Sahar."

"Nobody wants to live their life with their weakness continuously forcing them to feel bad, you made me realise that I shouldn't either. I admit that everything I've said to you was wrong, I felt hurt for saying those things to you and I can't imagine how hurt you must've felt because you were the person who took in those words." he runs a hand through his hair. "I'm a terrible person, each time I try to be good I fail and each time I try to be bad I succeed, what I'm trying to say is that I don't deserve you at all because someone needs you more than I need you."

"Who needs me?" I murmur.

"You need yourself, you need to love yourself before you ever think about anyone else. Stop trying to make others happy when you're not happy yourself, that's what I can't help but dislike about you. Why do you always think about others and not yourself? Can't you see yourself Sahar, can't you see how much you need yourself?" his words cause my body to shiver. I need me.

"Even though I told you that I hate you, you still listen to me, you still talk to me like I'm a human being. Aren't you supposed to be angry at me, feel angry at me, I don't deserve your kindness, a bad person shouldn't feel good, they should feel bad for what they did." he grabs my arm and placed it near his face. "I deserve it, punch me because my words were rude and disgusting."

I glance at his pleading expression. I pull my hand away from him. "I just wanted an apology."

He looks at me. "I don't understand."

"Asher, just because you made one mistake doesn't mean I should remove you from my life completely, I believe that people can change and I know that you can, mistakes are a part of human nature, we can't pretend that they don't exist."

"But she left." a tear slides down his face.

"Who left?" I murmur.

"My little sister. I made one mistake and she left forever."

His words cause my heart to numb. This is the person a Normani described as a murderer. She really uses a person's mistake and turns it into a horrible lie. She wanted to ruin Asher because of a small mistake.

"Asher you need to understand that it won't always be like that, you repented on that mistake and apologised sincerely so it's okay. I won't leave you for one mistake, ever." he looks at me sincerely.

"I'm sorry."

His apology causes me to smile.

"I'm really sorry, I can't explain how sorry I am, I hope you forgive me." he says, glancing at me.

"I'm sorry too." I say, a weight feels as if it's being lifted from my back. "I shouldn't have left you two years ago, it was my mistake of pretending as if nothing happened at all when something did."

"I always wondered why you left." Asher says quietly. "You left me without a word, moved classes and I never really saw you at school." he says, the guilt I felt was rising at each second.

"I thought you were like this to everyone, that you used them and never spoke to them again." I mumble, now that I think of it, what I did was childish and irresponsible.

"I was never like this to anyone, I never did that to anyone, you were the first person I've ever—"

"Oh my gosh." I blurt out. I took Asher's virginity. What's wrong with me? How could I do that to him? How did I believe those rumours and leave him without a word?

I felt his hand on my shoulder. "Hey."

I look up.

"It's alright, I forgive you and you forgive me, let's pretend everything never happened." I look at him and nod my head. The best way was to forgive and forget.

"That's the best way." I respond.

"Let's be companions again." he smiles, his hand reaching out towards me.

—

what are yours opinions on this chapter? how do you feel? who do you ship? there's still more drama to come, but i'll let these nice moments last for a few chapters.

thank you for 95,000 reads! i appreciate it so much. let's get to 100k! hopefully i will update a chapter tomorrow too :)